Behind the Lens

by Heather Dahlgren

  After doing individual shots for everyone except for me, Brinley, and another girl, Kallie finally calls me. I follow her down to the water, and once we are there, it is straight to work. “Take your shirt off, cross your arms, and give me a serious look.” I toss my shirt behind her and do exactly as she says. “Perfect, now I want you on your knees, hands in your hair, looking up at the sky.” Shot after shot, she tells me exactly what she wants, but it’s the last two that really intrigue me. “I want you on your stomach, arms stretched out right where the waves lap onto the beach.” The waves lapping on my hot body are a much-needed relief from the hot sun and photographer. “Now flip onto your back, and put your arms under your head, and close your eyes.” Once I do that, I can hear the clicking of the camera, and then I feel her legs straddle me as she is standing over me. I’ve never been more grateful in my life to have my eyes closed. “Damn, Jax, these are amazing. You can rinse off now.” I sit up and she smiles at me. I’m so caught off guard that I don’t notice the sound of the wave, and it smacks me in the face, knocking me backward. I stand up quickly and look at her. She has her hand over her mouth, and her eyes are the size of half dollars. “Holy shit, are you alright?” I laugh through my embarrassment.

  “I’m fine.” I walk into the water and go under with the next wave, getting as much sand off me as possible. I turn to walk back up and there is Kallie snapping away. “You never let an opportunity pass you by, do you?” She laughs and continues to snap more even as I wipe my face of the water dripping down.

  “Honestly, Jax, no, I never let an opportunity pass me. We just met so you don’t know that, but ask Brinley. We’ve been friends since college. She’ll tell you how I am.” She laughs while shaking her head.

  “Kallie, I have to say I’ve never met anyone like you.” She smiles, but I can tell she’s not sure if that is a compliment or not. “That’s a good thing, believe me. I’ve never seen a photographer more passionate before. It’s been amazing to watch, honestly.” I am rewarded with that genuine smile.

  “That means more to me then you could ever imagine. Alright, let’s head back so I can finish up these shots. I’m fucking starving. You can go grab lunch now if you want. After I finish with Brinley and Melanie, we will have an hour or so break. So go enjoy, but just be back here at three o’clock.” I stop walking, reach out, and touch her arm. She stops and looks at me.

  “Do you like burgers?” She just stares at me. I laugh and ask again, “Do you like burgers?”

  “Umm, yes?” I smirk at her confusion.

  “I’m going to grab some burgers with Blake and the guys. I’ll bring you back one. How do you like it?”

  “Oh no, you don’t need to do that.” I stand in front of her and realize just how much taller I am.

  “If you don’t tell me how you like it, I’ll bring it back the way I like it.” It doesn’t take her long to tell me just how she likes her burger. I give her a wink, and we walk back up to everyone. She calls Brinley down for her shoot, while the rest of us go to grab some lunch. I made sure to ask Brinley and Melanie what they wanted to eat as well. I’m not an asshole; I couldn’t bring Kallie back food and not the other girls.

  It takes us a good half hour to get the food before we head back to the beach. Some of them stay and eat there, but most of us go back. “What are you trying to be class pet or some shit?” I glance over at Blake before looking back at the road.

  “What the fuck is that supposed to mean?” He switches the radio station and drums his fingers on his lap.

  “You know exactly what I mean.” He’s right. I’ve never gone out of my way to make sure a photog gets lunch, but in my defense, we’ve never done a shoot like this. “Think it through all you want, brother, but you’ve got a hard-on for Kallie.” Douche bag is right, I do.

  “I’ll admit is she fucking stunning, and I am intrigued by her, but I’m not stupid enough to fuck up the chance at working with an amazing photographer.” He chuckles as I park the car.

  “Jax, sometimes I think you forget just how well I know you.” I get out and slam the door because son of a bitch, he’s right.

  THIS DAY SO FAR HAS surpassed my expectations. The weather is perfect, the setting is breathtaking, and the models are awe-inspiring. The chemistry with all of them as a whole is amazing. When I was eating my lunch that Jax so generously got for me, I flipped through some of the photos and I’ll admit I’m proud of myself. I can’t wait to get home and get them all on my computer to start editing. “Kallie, did you say I was shooting next with Jax?” I look over at Melanie and smile. Everyone wants to shoot with Jax; hell, I was taken back when I first saw him. Of course, I knew who he was; you’d have to live under a rock not to know, but holy fuck, in person, I can honestly say I’ve never met a sexier man. His blue eyes hold such intensity and mystery, his body is . . . shit let’s be honest here, makes you want to rip off the rest of his clothes. He’s muscular and the way the tattoos wrap around his arms, damn, it just makes him that much hotter. “Kallie?” I snap my head up to Melanie. Fuck, I forgot she was talking.

  “Sorry, sweetie, it’s been a long day. Yes, I want a few shots of you with Jax. Then I’ll finish off with Jax and Brinley. That way everyone has been photographed with everyone.” She gives me a huge smile as she walks away, and my stomach tightens a bit. Well, what the fuck is that? I see models hooking up all the time, why should it bother me now? I shake my head to clear it of these unnecessary thoughts and pick up my camera. “We are almost done, guys. I need Jax and Melanie for a few shots, and I’ll finish up with Brinley and Jax. I want to get a few shots of all of you at sunset, so don’t go too far.” They are all just laughing and having a great time, which makes me happy because I want them to enjoy working with me. I make my way down to the water once Jax and Melanie head down.

  When I get down there, they are talking, and Melanie is definitely bringing out the full flirt—laughing, light touching, pushing your tits out. Yep, she’s full flirting. “Alright, guys, just a few shots, I know it’s been a long-ass day. I want these to be intimate. Jax, I want you to hold Melanie close to you, maybe run your fingers down her face or touch her hair, but I want you both staring into the other’s eyes.” I change lenses on the camera before putting the camera strap around my neck. “I’m ready when you are.” Jax wraps one of his strong tattooed arms around her waist, resting his hand low on her hip. He gently pulls her close and drags his thumb down her cheek. I actually witness her gasp. I can’t stop snapping; it is stunning. They are both so amazing at what they do; no further instructions are needed. He rests his forehead on hers and cups her face with both hands, and he kisses her forehead before moving down and pressing his lips to hers. I’m not going to lie; it’s fucking sensual and one hell of a turn on.

  “What the fuck!” I pull the camera away and see Jax step away, staring angrily at Melanie.

  “What’s wrong?” I look at both of them completely lost. Jax just continues to stare down Melanie, and her face reads of complete embarrassment.

  “I’m sorry. I guess I was just in the moment.” He shakes his head and finally looks over at me.

  “Sorry, Kallie. I didn’t intend to fuck up the shoot. I’ve just never had a woman grab my cock before while shooting.” I whip my head to Melanie.

  “Melanie, what the fuck? You know better than to pull some shit like that. We are done. Go get Brinley.” I’m so fucking pissed. The pictures were stunning, and she had to go fuck it all up.

  “Kallie, please. I’m sorry, I just let the moment sweep me away.” I shake my head in disgust. What the models do on their own time is their business, but when I am shooting them, I will never allow one to be uncomfortable and Jax is now. I can see it on his face. Not to mention, she grabbed his cock. What the fuck!

  “Melanie, we are done. Go.” She shakes her head and walks up the beach.

  “Jax, I am so sorry. I don’t know what the fuck to say.” He takes two steps closer to me, putting him pretty much as cl
ose to me as they just were.

  “I’m sorry. I should have just continued, but it shocked me. I feel like an asshole for ruining the shot.” I’m overcome with his body heat and the intensity in his eyes. I feel my nipples getting hard when he rubs my arm. I can’t even speak; I’m so mesmerized with this man. I know I need to back away to break this trance, but I can’t, I’m glued in place. He moves his hand down to mine and grabs it, squeezing lightly, never once breaking eye contact. He pokes out his tongue the slightest bit, wetting his lips, and I realize I’m biting mine.

  “Shit, what the fuck happened?” Boom! That’s the bursting of this sexual bubble I was just surrounded in. I pull my hand away from Jax as quickly as possible and spin around to Brinley.

  “What the fuck is that supposed to mean? Nothing happened.” Guilt, that right there is guilt talking. Never, ever have I been so fucking stupid as to let my guard down with one of my models. I am disgusted with myself for even thinking for a moment what it would be like to be fucked by this God of men.

  “Nothing happened? Then why the fuck is Melanie up there freaking out?” Oh, fuck, shit, right, Melanie. Oh my God, she was talking about Melanie, not me. “Jax, here, I figured with this drama you could use a cigarette.” He grabs it from her and lights right up.

  “Damn, thanks.” He walks a bit away from us, and Brinley raises her eyebrows at me.

  “I was shooting and Jax yelled. Turns out grabby up there got a hold of his cock and decided to give it a nice squeeze.” She opens her eyes so wide I can’t even see her lids.

  “Holy shit.” I nod my head, agreeing with her. “So what, you told her to take a hike?” I blow out a breath trying to regain complete control of my body still.

  “Pretty much. She said she was caught up in the moment, but I’m not about to have a model uncomfortable.” She laughs and looks behind me, I’m assuming to see where Jax is.

  “Kallie, I’ve been butt ass naked with a model in a bed, shower, tub, you name it, and never have cock grabbed, no matter how in the moment I am. She’s full of shit and you know it. She wants in his pants. It’s as simple as that.

  “I know that, I’m not a fucking idiot.” I look at Jax who is blowing smoke out of his mouth, staring out into the ocean. He looks in deep thought, and I really hope that is because of Melanie. I just need to finish this up. It’s been a long day, and we all need to get home. Turning back to Brinley, I smile. “I want a few shots of you and Jax, and then we will do a couple of everyone again at sunset. I know everyone is exhausted. It’s been a long day.”

  “Always right back to work. You don’t stop for a minute.” I lift my shoulders and adjust my camera around my neck.

  “You know me.” Just as I turn to go get Jax, he walks over to us. He gives me an almost shy smile when he reaches us. “You better now? Ready to do a few shots with Brinley?” I just need to finish this shoot because I’m extremely frustrated with myself at this point.

  “I’m fine. Are you alright?” Please, stop being so sweet; stop looking at me with those telling eyes.

  “I’m great. Let’s do this before we lose light, alright?” I turn away from him. “Brin, let’s go.” She pulls off her sundress, revealing a black-and-white striped bikini that shows off her amazing body. These two work perfectly together. I told them to be sexy and just let them at it. The photos I’ve gotten are spectacular. I especially love this last one I’m shooting of them. He’s on top of her, pinning her hands above her head. She has an innocent look, and he has a hard expression. Stunning. “Perfect guys, seriously amazing.” Jax stands up and puts out his hand to help Brinley up. Of course, he does. I just want to get these final shots and rest my overactive mind. I turn and wave everyone down so I can do just that. They all make their way down, and I tell everyone to make these last few photos serious, not goofy. Melanie, thankfully, stays at one end and Jax at the other. They all get together in the perfect arrangement and all look at me completely serious while I snap away. The sun is setting behind them, giving me the most brilliant pink backdrop. After taking several pictures, I let my camera hang on my neck. “Let me first say thank you. You have all been amazing, and the photos are spectacular. I know we are all exhausted. It’s been a long ass day. I appreciate your commitment to this and for sticking it out with me. Now get the hell out of here, go home, and crash.” I get a ton of hugs and kisses before they all finally leave.

  I pack up all my lenses and put my camera in the bag. I throw that on my shoulder and go to grab the bag with all my other crap in it. “I’ve got that.” I know it’s Jax without even looking up. I close my eyes and blow out a breath. I straighten up and smile at him.

  “You don’t need to do that. I told you I’m used to this.” He picks up the bag and winks at me.

  “Oh well. Where are you parked?” He has to know nothing can happen here. It’s against everything I stand for and not just me, all photographers.

  “I’m right up here.” I just walk and let him follow me. Thankfully, since I was the first one here, I am parked close. I unlock my Jeep and put the camera bag on the passenger seat before turning to look at him. He grins at me and my stomach tightens. He hands me the bag, and I toss it next to the camera bag, willing him to leave quickly. No such luck. When I turn around again, he is leaning on the Jeep with his arms crossed.

  “It was one hell of a shoot today.” I close the door and lean on it, copying his position.

  “Thank you. I couldn’t have been happier with the way things went.” I look at him and he smiles. “Well, minus the Melanie incident. Again, I’m so sorry about that. Nothing like that has ever happened with any of my models before. I hope that doesn’t deter you from working with me in the future.” He laughs, and I find myself joining him.

  “Kallie, believe me, a little cock grabbing isn’t going to keep me from working with you. I am looking forward to the next time. You are definitely one of the most intriguing photographers I’ve ever worked with.” The compliment feels amazing, especially coming from him. He’s worked with some of the biggest photographers I know.

  “This is my life, everything I’ve ever wanted. So when you say something like that, it truly is a huge compliment. Thank you.” He is searching my face, for what, I have no idea. I blink and look away though because it’s feeling too intimate. “I really need to get going. I have plans tomorrow, so I need to get these photos uploaded tonight.” He pushes off the Jeep and stands in front of me. Not as close as earlier, but too close nonetheless.

  “What plans do you have tomorrow? Dinner with your boyfriend?” I can’t help but burst out laughing. It catches me completely off guard. He raises his eyebrows and gives me that smirk.

  “Shit, I’m sorry. No, no dinner plans with the boyfriend. No boyfriend. I have a shoot with my brother and his family.” He becomes completely serious, searching my face again. I really wish he’d stop doing that shit.

  “Why is it so funny that I’d ask if you have a boyfriend?” I straighten my back and clear my throat, feeling like I need to defend myself.

  “You’re a nosy little shit. If you must know, most guys are jealous, insecure pricks that can’t handle what I do for a living. What I do is so much more important than a relationship anyway. I really need to get home, Jax. Thank you for helping with my bag and for being part of this today.” I open my Jeep door, and he puts his arm against the truck, trapping me in place. I have my back turned to him, and I’ve no intention of turning around. I feel him move closer and my heart pounds in my chest.

  “You just haven’t found the right guy, that’s all. Good night, Kallie.” He doesn’t say another word, and I hear his feet crunching on the rocks as he makes his way to his car. I never once turn around. I climb into the truck and slam the door. The only sound is my heavy breathing and the frantic beating of my heart. With a shaking hand, I push the key into the ignition and start my Jeep. I close my eyes momentarily and think about what he said. He’s right about one thing. I haven’t found the right guy, a
nd I sure as shit know it won’t be him, if that’s what he meant. I snap my eyes open at the realization. What the hell am I getting so worked up about? I know nothing will happen with us, and I know he knows it too. He’s more than likely just being a major flirt, which I have read he is. I shake my head and laugh at myself. What a fool. I throw the Jeep in reverse and finally head home.

  When I get home, I take a shower, and I am so exhausted, I fall asleep on my bed in just my towel. I wake up this morning thankful I live alone, considering I am butt ass naked lying on top of my covers. I throw on my yoga pants and a tank top, go into my office, and star loading all the photos from yesterday. While they load, I go into the kitchen and make myself a cup of tea. I sip it and smile. I love tea. I’ll drink coffee, but tea is my favorite. I check on the photos and see I have hundreds to go on just this memory card, and I have five more. I’m not going to sit here while they load; I am going to relax on my couch and hopefully find something good on TV. I have a few hours before Braden gets here with his family. I want to just veg out.

  That’s just what I end up doing for an hour, sitting on the couch watching some movie on Lifetime and drinking my tea. I haven’t had a relaxing morning like this in a long time, and it feels great. When the movie goes to a commercial, I figure I should check the photos. I get up and there is a knock on the door. I look at the clock and see it’s much too early for it to be Braden. There is another knock, so I rush over to answer it. I swing open the door and there standing in the hallway is Jax. He is dressed in a pair of jeans, a plain blue T-shirt, and a black baseball hat with some writing on it I can’t make out. He looks amazing, and that’s when I realize I’m standing there in yoga pants, a tank top with no bra on, and my hair in a messy bun. I just keep staring at him in shock. How the hell did he know where I live? Why is he here? Why am I not speaking? “Sorry to bother you at home. I went back onto the beach last night before I left, and I found this laying in the sand. I figured you’d miss it.” He sticks out his hand and my cell phone is in it.