by Joan Jonker
‘She’s right, Claire,’ Molly said. ‘I’m not suggesting yer go out and find a man to marry just to stop yer from being lonely, sunshine, for life with a man yer didn’t love would be no life at all. But ye’re only young, Claire, and ye’re blessed with the looks of a film star. Surely if yer met someone who fell for yer, and he was a good man, yer’d consider getting married again, wouldn’t yer? After all, the children won’t be with yer for ever.’
‘Chance is a fine thing, Molly, and it may never come my way. And yer can’t say yer’d get married, or yer wouldn’t get married, until yer have the opportunity to choose.’ Claire put a finger to her chin. ‘I won’t say I’ve never had the opportunity, for that would be telling lies, but not from anyone I could take to.’ She grinned at Nellie. ‘Here’s a nice bit of gossip for yer to keep under yer hat. There’s a man comes in the shop twice a week. He brings his shirts and collars to be laundered, and last week he brought in a suit to be dry cleaned. He has taken to holding a conversation with me, just for a few minutes, but I think he’s got his eye on me. So look out for further instalments in the near future.’
Nellie leaned forward so quickly she banged her bosom on the table and grimaced. But it didn’t stop her from saying, ‘Go ’way, girl. What’s he like?’
‘He’s presentable, quite good-looking, in fact, but we haven’t got as far as exchanging names or anything like that. He could be married with half a dozen kids for all I know.’
‘I doubt if he’s married, sunshine, for if he was he wouldn’t need to bring things to the laundry. His wife would be doing the washing.’ Molly was now showing interest. ‘How old would yer say he was, sunshine, just out of curiosity?’
‘I’m not very good at guessing ages, Molly, but I’d say he was probably a little bit older than I am. And he always seems to be well dressed.’
This was like manna from heaven to Nellie who loved a bit of tasty news. ‘He must have money, then, girl? Ooh, yer could have hopped in lucky.’
Molly tutted. ‘Don’t be marrying the girl off, sunshine. She doesn’t even know the bloke’s name. She’s only telling us all this to satisfy your curiosity.’
Nellie managed a look of disgust as she eyed her mate. ‘It’s better than talking about the bleeding weather, isn’t it? I don’t care if Claire is making the whole thing up. At least it’s got more life in it than saying the price of fish has gone up.’
Molly feigned surprise. ‘It hasn’t, has it, sunshine? Blimey, it was dear enough as it was. We bought some last week, but I don’t remember the bloke behind the counter saying it had gone up. I’d have told him to keep his ruddy fish if he had. And I don’t trust him, anyway. His eyes are too close together for my liking.’
Claire was enjoying this, and feeling really at home. None of her neighbours were like these two, worse luck. ‘I wouldn’t know, ’cos it’s very seldom I buy fresh fish. Ken and Amy prefer it in batter from the chippy.’
‘Bloody hell, what’s the matter with you two! We’ve gone from a nice man what comes in the laundry to have his shirts washed to the price of bleeding fish! Can we get back to the feller what’s got his eye on Claire, if yer don’t mind. Otherwise I’ll put a curse on both of yer, and the next time yer buy fish the feller will give yer a piece what’s been in the window for a week and pongs to high heaven.’
‘Ooh, my mate’s getting a cob on, Claire. We’d better go from the fish shop to the laundry,’ Molly said. ‘What colour eyes has this man got? And I hope they’re not close together, ’cos, like I said, I don’t trust people with eyes close together. And what about his hair, what colour is that?’
‘To tell yer the truth Molly, I’ve never taken much notice. I don’t like looking at him too closely in case he thinks I’m forward. But I’d say from the colour of his skin that he’ll have mousy hair and hazel eyes.’
‘Listen to me, girl, never mind what me mate says.’ Nellie lifted her bust when she leaned forward; she’d had one knock today and didn’t fancy another. ‘To hell with what colour his hair is, or if his eyes are close together. What yer want to be finding out is has he got a wallet full of pound notes? If yer find out he has, well, then, yer should start to work yer charms on him. You know, a nice smile to show yer’ve still got yer own teeth, and perhaps yer could come out from behind the counter to give him his cleaning, and he’ll see what a smashing figure yer’ve got. Then next week yer could perhaps have a little chat with him. Yer’ll have to encourage him, yer know, girl, ’cos faint heart never won rich man with fat wallet.’
‘And the third week, sunshine, d’yer want Claire to flaunt herself at him? Perhaps lift her skirt and show a bit of ankle?’
‘Yeah, let him see what he’d be getting for his money. I mean, no man will fork out for something that’s wrapped up. They want to see what they’re spending it on.’
Claire laughed. ‘The poor man probably wouldn’t recognise me if he fell over me in the street, and here’s Nellie asking me to do a striptease for him.’
‘I never said no such thing, girl, and don’t yer be putting words in me mouth.’
‘Nellie, you don’t need anyone to put words into yer mouth, sunshine, yer’ve got enough of yer own. Yer might not be able to spell them, might not even know what they mean, but yer’ve got them all the same. In twenty-odd years, I’ve never known yer be lost for words.’
Nellie’s chin jutted out to put emphasis on what she had to say. ‘Yeah, and if it was me working in that laundry shop, instead of Claire, I’d be using every word I know. And with a few tricks thrown in.’ Nellie’s chins were wishing she would keep her head still, for they were getting dizzy being thrown sideways and then up and down. ‘It’s a pity yer haven’t got a big bust like me, girl. That would make him take notice of yer. Yer see, men like something to get hold of.’
Molly took exception to that remark. ‘Ay, sunshine, not all men like well-padded women. Your Steve didn’t, did he? He’s crazy about our Jill, and she’s very slim. And Phil, Tommy and Archie, they’ve all married girls with slender figures.’
‘Take no notice of me mate, girl,’ Nellie said. ‘She’s always been green with envy over my voluptuous body, and the way men turn their heads when they see me. I don’t blame her, mind; I’m not the type to take offence. I feel sorry for her, if the truth be known, ’cos it must make her feel jealous when men pass her by to look at me. But, as they say, girl, if yer ain’t got it, then yer ain’t got it! We can’t all have everything, but I can’t help feeling sorry for them what were behind the door when figures were being given out.’
The table began to jump up and down as Nellie took a fit of laughing. ‘Ay, me saying if yer ain’t got it, then yer ain’t got it, well, it’s reminded me of something the three of us ain’t got. And that’s a ruddy cup of tea. And don’t try and palm me off by telling me to pour meself a cup out, girl, ’cos what’s in the pot will be stiff by now.’ She rubbed her hands together. ‘Go on, don’t sit there like a stuffed dummy, show Claire what a good hostess yer are. And while ye’re out there, see if there’s enough ham left for another sarnie.’
If looks could kill, Nellie would have been a dead duck. For she knew Molly had only bought a quarter of boiled ham, and she also knew it had been used up on the sandwiches. It couldn’t have been stretched any further or they wouldn’t have been able to taste it, and Nellie must have been aware of that.
‘I don’t want another sandwich, Molly,’ Claire said. ‘They were very nice, and I enjoyed them, but if I had another it would put me off me dinner. I’d love another cup of tea, though, and then I’ll be on me way. I like to be home when Amy comes in from school.’
‘I’ll put the kettle on,’ Molly said, jumping to her feet. ‘I could do with another drink meself.’ She was in the kitchen lighting the gas under the kettle when she heard Nellie talking.
‘It’s been nice having a visitor in the afternoon, girl, yer’ll have to come again.’
‘Yes, I’ve enjoyed it,’ Claire told her. �
��It’s not very often I go anywhere on a social visit, what with working four mornings and having to be home in time for Amy. Friday is the only day I have any time to spare.’
‘Come again next Friday, then, girl, it’ll be a break for yer. Me and Molly would love to see yer and have a natter. Yer could tell us how ye’re getting on with the man what comes in the shop.’ Nellie raised her voice so Molly could hear her. ‘We’d be made up to see Claire next Friday, wouldn’t we, girl?’
Molly’s eyes were rolling. How kind it was of her mate to be giving invitations out for afternoon tea in Molly’s house! Nellie wasn’t soft, and neither was she backward in coming forward. Well, it was time to give her a taste of her own medicine. ‘I’m not too sure about next Friday.’ She poked her head round the kitchen door. ‘Phil wants us to pick his mam up one day next week, and bring her to his house by taxi, but he didn’t say what day.’ She moved further into the room. If the kettle came to the boil she’d hear the whistle. ‘Did yer know Phil’s mam is very ill, Claire? She can’t make it here on her own, so me and Nellie pick her up at least once a week, and Phil fetches her on a Saturday. So I wouldn’t like to make arrangements for Friday until I’ve had a word with him. What I could do is give Phil a message to pass on to your Ken. That would be the best plan. If Friday’s okay, then yer could come at the same time, and Nellie can play hostess. She’d go mad if she thought yer were coming to my house every week, ’cos she likes nothing better than to entertain.’ She smiled sweetly at her mate, who was sitting with her mouth open. ‘Yer’d like that, wouldn’t yer, sunshine? And what are yer sitting with yer mouth open for? Anyone would think yer were catching flies.’
Molly jumped when she heard the kettle whistling. ‘Entertain our guest while I see to the tea, sunshine.’ She couldn’t get into the kitchen fast enough to double up with quiet laughter. The look Nellie had given her was enough to turn the milk sour. Never once in the twenty-odd years they’d been friends had Nellie had visitors. If anyone knocked at her door she didn’t make them welcome, didn’t even let them over the doorstep, but brought them straight along to Molly’s.
‘Have you gone to China for that bleeding tea, Molly Bennett? Me and Claire are sitting here with our tongues hanging out.’
‘I’m coming, I’m coming, I’m coming! Keep yer ruddy hair on, sunshine, I’ve only got one pair of hands.’ Molly carried two cups of steaming tea through and put them on the table. ‘Who was yer servant before I came along, Nellie McDonough?’
Nellie gave her daggers, but she knew better than to argue in front of Claire. ‘My feller was, girl, and when he was at work I had to do it meself. I wasn’t half glad when I got pally with you and found yer were daft enough to put up with me.’
‘Aye, and I have lived to rue the day, sunshine. I hardly knew yer when one day yer asked me if I was going to the shops would I get yer a small loaf and four ounces of margarine. Yer said yer’d pay me when I got back, and like a fool I believed yer.’ Molly turned and winked at Claire. ‘To this day I’ve never been paid that money back.’
Nellie waved her hand, nearly knocking her cup over. ‘Go on, tell her how many cups of tea I’ve had off yer.’
‘No, sunshine, I don’t want to embarrass yer.’
‘Yer won’t embarrass me, girl, it’s yerself what will be embarrassed. Anyway, I’ll tell her meself. At the last count, my mate reckons I’ve had one thousand, four hundred and fifty-six cups of tea off her over the years.’
‘Ye’re well out, Nellie, it’s over two thousand by now. And it must be well over a million grains of sugar.’
Claire was being well entertained; she thought they were hilarious. ‘Well, two can play at that game, Nellie, so why don’t yer tell her how many cups of tea she’s had in your house? And yer could guess how many grains of sugar.’
Molly was delighted. ‘Yes, that’s a good idea, sunshine, to get yer own back on me. Go on, tell Claire how many cups of tea I’ve had in your house.’
Nellie ground her teeth together. Just wait until Claire had gone, she wouldn’t half give Molly a piece of her mind. ‘I don’t know, I’m not very good at figures. Anyway, I wouldn’t keep count like you do, I’m not that tight.’
‘Just tell the truth, sunshine, that’s all yer’ve got to do. But don’t forget what Claire said about not having cream slices in hell.’
Nellie was beginning to see the funny side. She propped her elbows on the table and cupped her face in her chubby hands. ‘Let’s see if I can get this straight, girl, ’cos I don’t want to make a liar of meself. I’m sure I gave yer a cup of tea one pancake Tuesday. The reason I remember, I asked yer to lend me some sugar to put on the pancakes. And I said to meself that I couldn’t let yer go without offering yer a cuppa after yer being so good.’
Molly nodded. ‘I remember that, too, sunshine, ’cos it was the first and last time I got a drink off yer. It was before the war, I remember that, too! But what the heck, what’s a couple of thousand cups of tea among friends? We’re still best mates, and that’s the main thing.’
When it was time for Claire to leave, she didn’t feel like moving. She felt as though she’d known Molly and Nellie for years. ‘Yer won’t forget to send a message through Ken, will yer? I’ve really enjoyed meself and I don’t want to lose touch with yer.’
Molly followed her to the door. ‘I’ll send a message, don’t fret. Next Friday will probably be fine, but I’ll have to check with Phil.’ She stood on the step until Claire turned, then they waved to each other and Molly went back inside and closed the front door behind her.
Nellie was waiting for her, nostrils flared and eyes narrowed. ‘What d’yer think ye’re doing, inviting her to my house? Yer had a bleeding cheek, Molly Bennett. Yer know I don’t like having visitors.’
‘I know yer don’t, sunshine, that’s why I was so surprised when I heard yer inviting Claire to come next Friday. I couldn’t believe me ears.’
‘I didn’t invite her to mine, I invited her here! Don’t yer be telling fibs, Molly Bennett.’
‘Nellie, yer’ve either got a very short memory, or a very convenient one. Who was it said, “Come again next Friday, girl, it’ll be a break for yer”?’
Nellie grunted and lowered her head. ‘When I said come again, I meant come again here, and yer know ruddy well I meant here.’
‘I have no objection to her coming here, sunshine, ’cos I like her and I think she’s lonely.’
‘Then what are yer making a song and dance about it for?’
‘There’s a condition attached to it. If it’s going to be a regular visit, then we share the cost. Next week you pay for the ham and cakes, I’ll pay the week after. Isn’t that fair?’
‘I suppose so, but ye’re not half getting tight in yer old age.’
‘Oh, I’m going to be really tight with yer right now, Nellie, and I don’t care what names yer call me. I want the money off yer for the cake yer got off Edna Hanley. Yer said I’d pay her tomorrow, and I will, but it’ll be with your money, not me own.’
Nellie looked up at the ceiling. ‘All I can put it down to, Lord, is that this morning she got out of bed on the wrong side.’
Chapter Eight
‘What day do yer want me and Nellie to pick yer mam up, Phil?’ Molly asked, tickling Bobby’s tummy as he lay on the couch kicking his legs. ‘It doesn’t make any difference what day, it’s just that when Claire called this afternoon for a cuppa and a chat, my mate was very generous, very hail fellow well met, and asked her to call again next week ’cos it was nice having a visitor in the afternoon. The invitation wasn’t for Claire to visit her house, mind, Nellie’s not that soft. No, she invited her to mine.’
Doreen laughed, thinking that was hilarious. ‘Trust Auntie Nellie. I bet she sat in that posh chair, waving her hand about like a lady of the manor. But why won’t she ever have visitors at her house? I know it’s not often that Uncle George’s brother and his wife come to see them, but when they do she brings them straight to your
s.’
‘I know. It’s all me own fault. And it’s not as if I don’t tell her what I think, ’cos I do, but she looks at me as though it’s me that’s in the wrong. She’s got a skin as thick as a rhinoceros – insults just bounce off her. Anyway, in this instance I don’t mind, because Claire is a lovely woman, and I feel a bit sorry for her being left a widow at her age.’
‘Yer’ll have to bring her over next time she comes,’ Victoria said. ‘Phil is always saying how well brought up young Ken is, and I’d like to meet his mother.’
Doreen nodded. ‘Yeah, bring her over next time she comes, Mam.’
‘Yer don’t know what ye’re letting yerself in for, sunshine, ’cos yer wouldn’t only get Claire, yer’d have to take the whole package. That means me and Nellie come with her.’
‘Well, we didn’t expect her to come on her own, Mam, ’cos we knew Auntie Nellie wouldn’t be left out. And we wouldn’t want her to be, would we, Aunt Vicky?’
‘Certainly not!’ Victoria was quite definite. ‘We wouldn’t leave her out for the world.’
‘Yer wouldn’t get the chance, Victoria,’ Molly told her. ‘If yer didn’t open the door to her she’d have the street out by banging like hell on yer window until yer let her in.’
‘Oh, I know Auntie Nellie’s tricks, Mam. I’d open the door before she had time to lift her hand.’ Doreen smiled at a memory. ‘Ay, Mam, do yer remember the night she sneaked up the back yard, and was peering through the curtains to see what you and me dad were up to?’
Molly chuckled. ‘She got her eye wiped, though, ’cos Jack was reading the Echo and I was darning a sock. But we both jumped when she banged on the window because we thought some kid had kicked a ball over, and we expected the pane to break.’ She could see the scene in her mind. ‘I was blazing when I opened the kitchen door. I felt like strangling her. But she just pushed me aside and walked into the living room. And before Jack, or me, could say anything, she put her hands on her hips and said, “What a miserable pair of buggers you are. I thought yer’d be enjoying yerself with all the kids out and the house to yerselves. Here’s me thinking I’d catch yer in a passionate embrace, and what do I find? One’s reading a ruddy paper and the other’s darning a flaming sock!” I won’t give yer chapter and verse of what else she said, but I can say I blushed to the roots of me hair, and Jack didn’t know where to put his face. He’s not easily embarrassed, he enjoys a laugh as well as the next man, but Nellie doesn’t leave anything to the imagination.’
