I looked up at him for the first time in this conversation. His face was warm and inviting. There was a kindness about him that made me feel so comfortable. I looked back at the tiny tube that might be my chance at freedom. I couldn’t believe he was this cool.
“I’ll leave it up to you whether you share that with your mother,” he said pointing at the tube still in my hand. “We can keep this between us if you like. I don’t necessarily agree with your mother’s choices in your lack of teaching but she’s your mother. I have to respect that. I just hope this gives you a little protection.”
I gave him a half smile. There was so much to think about. I curled my fingers around the tube and slid my hand slowly from the table. Underneath, I slipped my lifeline in my pocket. “Thanks,” I said weakly. I did mean it. I think I really like David.
My mother came in soon after with the lemon custard dessert I made. Flynn who had an unsure expression on his face followed shortly after. I really looked at him while he was distracted. He was so very attractive like his father. However, he lacked the warmth that so radiated from David. Had I missed judged Flynn based on the grapevine at school. My eyes refocused and I saw Flynn clearly again not looking through him at my thoughts. He was looking at me with a sly expression and a curved smile. Nope, I was very sure I hadn’t misjudged him at all. I looked away at the wall while my mother dished out dessert.
Over custard, I got my second surprise. David announced that we would all spend Thanksgiving break which was in a few weeks at his Lake house in northern Maryland. Dazed by all the events, I later excused myself from the table. My mom did the honor of cleaning up since I did all cooking. I headed into the family room. Mom and David would probably have after dinner coffee elsewhere in the house. I bided my time knowing Flynn would be following me in there soon. I braced myself not to be rude. I grabbed the remote to turn on the television in order to stifle any potential conversation.
I sat, no rather I plopped down on the sofa with one leg tucked under me. Suddenly, I wasn’t sure about my plan. Too much had happened in a short time. When Flynn walked in and sat right beside me even though there was a couple more feet of sofa, I didn’t have the energy to protest.
“You looked surprised by everything,” he said.
“You think,” I said sarcastically. I managed not to roll my eyes remembering my vow not to be rude.
“Your mom doesn’t tell you much, does she?” he asked.
I looked at him suddenly angry. I wanted to say, I don’t have a great dad like yours? Instead I snarled, “What does that have to do with anything?” Well, so much for not being rude.
He didn’t miss a beat and just looked as gorgeous as ever with a self righteous smirk on his face. “For one, you didn’t know about my dad. Therefore you don’t know how long they’ve been dating,” he said confidently. “I have a feeling you know next to nothing about who you are and how to control it.”
Since when did he become so intuitive? I couldn’t argue so I turned my attention to the television. I was scrolling through the onscreen guide for something to watch when he said something that made me freeze.
“I bet Paul was your first kiss.” My shock had to be written on my face. For a second, I’d actually stopped breathing.
He laughed then said, “That explains why you haven’t dated anyone at school since him. We wondered.”
I couldn’t believe it. Why would Flynn know I dated Paul or when? Why would he even care? But more importantly who had he meant when he said we? Was he referring to Luke or maybe his dad because based on his dad’s talk with me, Flynn had spoken to him about us kissing.
“Why’d you tell your dad about us?” I did want to know. Their relationship had to be tight.
He smiled, “So there’s an us now?”
I lifted my eyes heavenward. “You know what I mean.”
“I knew he was dating someone. I hadn’t bothered to get more details about her mystery daughter until he sprang it on me Monday after practice. Then I told him of my suspicion of a girl I kissed from school.”
My mind was rolling with questions that I lacked the knowledge about. Flynn obviously had some answers that I did not. So I asked, “How come you can go around kissing every girl in school and not kill anyone?” Maybe I didn’t need to talk to my mom after all.
“I knew you didn’t know anything,” he said still grinning and frankly I wanted to wipe the smile off his face but not before I got some answers.
“That’s beside the point.” I retorted. My hands were at my sides because I wanted to bolt from the room. He was making fun of me and seriously I felt like a fool. My mom made it seem like there was no way to control what I was, but apparently Flynn knew how to do it.
He must have recognized my preflight plan and stopped teasing. “I could teach you.” His words had been soft and understanding. I really looked at him now. He could be my savior and key to my destiny. Well, maybe not all that. His face was beautifully angelic but he was more like the devil reincarnated and I had to remember that.
I relaxed prematurely. “How?”
“Well, I have to show you as part of the instruction,” he said. Of course he did. I looked into his steel blue eyes to find the truth, but I could see nothing but the darkest depths of the ocean in them.
“And how would I explain that to Luke?” Once the words were out of my mouth, I wondered for the first time tonight if Luke knew what Flynn was and maybe even me. It could explain why he was ever so careful and understanding about kissing me. However, he still wanted to. I saw that in looks he gave me. I didn’t think he had a death wish. But then again maybe he thought I could control it like Flynn.
“This could be our secret,” he said and the sly grin began to return to his face. See there was the devil that hid itself behind the boyish good looks he had.
“You’re an ass.” I said. His grin faded but he didn’t seem angry.
He slipped back to his serious face. “Did you find out what you were when you kissed Paul?”
I wondered how the conversation circled back. The word tumbled from my mouth as if I’d been dying to tell someone my secrets. “Yes.”
“You didn’t kill him. So, how’d you stop yourself?” he asked. As if he’d given me truth serum I found myself explaining the story to him.
“Classic,” he said through a snicker. “Your mom caught you and saved Paul. That’s one for the books.”
“It’s not funny,” I said. There was nothing funny about it, at least from my point of view. Like tonight, that day marked a change in my existence. It was a pivotal moment in time for me like no other.
“She didn’t tell you about anything then.”
I brooded. “No,” I said coolly.
“I see,” he said as if that explained everything. “Your father’s human,” he said. I wasn’t sure if that was a statement or a question, but answered all the same.
“Yes, why is that relevant?” I asked.
“It means you don’t need human life to survive,” he said, staring at me. I didn’t say anything but something in his expression made me pause.
He spoke again with knowledge and truth that a parent would have given. “You’re more human than succubus. Which means your mom really didn’t have to tell you at an early age what you were.”
“And you need it don’t you?” I said slowly. Comprehension settled in. It made perfect sense now why he was with so many girls.
“Yes,” he said still looking at me. His eyes held unspoken words.
“You mom was succubus?” I asked. Again I spoke slowly, not sure how he would react to this question.
“Yes,” he said, again not elaborating. His tone had changed and that one word spoke years of pain.
“What happened to her?” I dared to ask. He had answered my previous questions.
“She gave her life for me to be born,” he began. Shockingly, he proceeded to explain everything about conception and birth for our race. Apparently full demons coupled toge
ther can’t procreate. But half demons can. A succubus or incubus fetus who needs life force will feed on the mother until it results in the mother’s death or its birth. He told me it was a choice the mother makes knowing it was likely she wouldn’t survive. However in my case because my father was human, I wouldn’t have needed the life force in my mother’s womb. Therefore she survived pregnancy. Oddly enough, I felt comforted by that. It must be hard for Flynn to know he killed his mother.
It was quiet for several minutes after he finished. What was I suppose to say? I wasn’t sure sorry was appropriate. But Flynn being Flynn broke the silence.
“So, I could teach you some control,” he said. This time there wasn’t a hint of a smile.
I had no hesitation this time. I wanted to know. I was about to tell him yes when his father walked in.
“You ready?” he said then looked at Flynn’s hand.
His finger was drawing a pattern on the back of my hand and I hadn’t noticed. How strange was that? I hadn’t known when he started but when he stopped I missed the contact.
“Sure,” he said getting up. He turned back to me once he got to the door and winked. That was the Flynn everybody knew and loved. But I like the other Flynn that I’d seen tonight, the one that seemed genuinely concerned and helpful. Was that all a lie? Could I trust him?
“See ya tomorrow,” he said and he exited the room with all the promise of my freedom from my succubus bond. I blinked and nodded my head, speechless.
Armed with my tube of succubus barrier and Flynn, my ace in the hole, I decided not to confront my mother. I needed to think about everything. First however, I needed to make a call.
Upstairs in my room, I checked my phone. I had a couple of text from Maggie desperate to find out the details of the dinner. I also had a text from Luke asking me to call him. I hadn’t asked Flynn about Luke. I don’t know if I was afraid to ask or afraid to know, but I didn’t dial Luke. Instead, I called Paul. I don’t know why considering our afternoon awkwardness but instinctively he was who I wanted to talk to.
I got his voicemail and left a simple message. “Call me, ok?” I didn’t text him because I wanted him to hear the sorry in my tone. I needed him to know without me saying it, that I was sorry. I put my phone down.
I wasn’t in the mood to call Maggie. She was still riding high on a new relationship. I needed someone to comfort me. She didn’t know my secrets. For her, Flynn my soon to be stepbrother scandal would amount in a tirade of what a scoundrel he was. But for me, right now, I needed to talk about what it meant for there to be another like me in my school. I would fill her in on the scandal in the morning.
As for Luke, I just didn’t know what to say. I was being a coward. So I texted him that I would see him tomorrow. Flynn would do the honors and tell him for sure, if he hadn’t already. That was what best friends were for, right? But then again isn’t that what girlfriends are for. Was I his officially his girlfriend? I wore his jacket but had we actually formally said those words. Was a formal declaration of such things proper procedure? Who was I to know. I’d never ask Maggie how she became a couple with whoever was the favor of the month.
I was tired and couldn’t think. My text to Luke was a copout, but I just couldn’t. I needed to see his face when I talked to him. I needed to know. I held the tube in my hand and made plans for tomorrow. Depending on his look, this little tube held promises.
Chapter Fourteen
undulate (v.) to move in waves
On the ride to school, I’d given Maggie the highlights of the evening only omitting one aspect, the supernatural part of the story therefore including the tube of my sovereignty. In her signature green sweater. Maggie like no one else looked amazing. The color brought out the forest green of her eyes. They twinkled as she questioned every detail.
“So will you be moving into their incredible house?” she asked.
I hadn’t thought about that. “Not sure,” I said. With everything that transpired, I forgotten that Maggie had seemed angry with me yesterday about Paul and Luke.
I felt like I needed to make amends and changed the conversation. “Maggs, Paul stopped by yesterday after you left.”
She gave me a quick glance and although her smile was gone she didn’t seem mad. “I know, I talked to him,” she said. Her bubbly tone was gone but there wasn’t any tension in her words.
“I straightened things out,” I said quickly.
“I know and I’m sorry I doubted you,” she said sincerely.
We pulled into the school parking lot. Maggie seemed as if she knew exactly where she was going instead of searching for a spot. We came down a row with a group of guys standing in an open spot. I could make out some of the figures such as Brent, Luke, and Flynn wearing winter jackets in the cold fall air. I saw only one guy in the distance with his letterman jacket on announcing to all girls he was available. When the guys moved out of the spot, Maggie pulled in. It was then I had my ‘duh’ moment. Brent had saved her this spot.
Through the windshield, I did something so foreign to me. I sought out Flynn’s face. I wanted to see if there were unspoken answers in them. Our eyes met for just a second and I saw nothing. Instead he turned and began to walk several spot up to where Paul and a group of cheerleaders stood in their uniform. Today was spirit day, yippee I thought sourly. Flynn’s back was to me as he stood with Paul and the rest of the guys other than Brent and Luke.
Brent was strategically parked to our left and Luke’s car, which I just noticed, was on the right. That made things easy. Maggie hopped out the car in her short jean skirt and into the arms of Brent. I had a quick moment to wonder what her brothers would do if they saw her now wrapped around a senior boy like a fruit roll up. That was Maggie for you. She put herself into every relationship one hundred percent. Even I was surprised she’d still held her virginity unless of course she lied to me. But I didn’t think so. She liked to talk and that would be a secret she would have to tell me.
Thinking back, I remembered how hard it was for her to date last year with her brother a senior. Her oldest brother had already gone to college. But it was Liam who took pride in scaring off most of her admirers, but not all. I thought about Doug, skater boy I liked to call him, for the first time in months. I wondered what he thought of her new boyfriend. Doug had been madly in love with Maggie. She’d broken up with him simply because he wasn’t much of a challenge for her. If only I could have been so lucky then to have that choice.
The thought was gone soon because I’d stepped out the car and was immediately folded into Luke arms. The hug was super sweet and he smelled nice. He smelled like a summer breeze and I wondered if whoever did laundry used those scented sheets in the dryer. But it was his eyes I wanted to see.
The moment are gazes met, I saw it before the words exited his mouth. “I heard,” he whispered as if others would over hear what he said. Everyone including Maggie was too far away for his word if spoken normally could have been heard.
I tried to pull back but he held me there a few more moments. I’d put on the secret balm on my lips before we pulled into the parking lot adding a bit of gloss on top. With two agenda’s on my mind when I came to school, I was determined to accomplish both. Luke had taking care of the first with his eyes and the two words. He wasn’t letting me do the other.
Finally, he let me out of the tight hug. I didn’t move back and held on with both of my hands. My backpack had me a bit off balance. I looked into his sky blue eyes and saw nothing but warmth. There was nothing more to say, instead I leaned into him and lifted onto my tip toes to kiss him full out.
I had no clue if this balm would work. There were so many witnesses, but maybe that was the point. If he turned blue, someone would notice in time to stop me.
Time seemed to stop when our lips met. Before I closed my eyes, I saw a moment of hesitation and surprise flicker in his eyes. Clearly, I was a novice at this. I parted my lips, nearly breaking our kiss, taking in a deep breath, when he took the oppo
rtunity to explore my mouth. His hands let go of mine and moved to the small of my back. It was like I could feel the heat of his hands radiate through the heavy jacket material onto my bare skin. Slowly one hand moved up to cup the back of my neck. He tasted like a cool breeze which is what I needed against the radiating heat that flooded the rest of my body.
I pressed my body firmly against his. I wanted to be closer to him like I hadn’t been close to anyone before. His hand fingered through my hair and I knew that the balm was working.
His lips were soft, warm, and inviting. I was truly kissing someone. I owed Flynn’s Dad everything. I would cook him a fabulous meal. I would cater their wedding if they wanted me to.
Time slowed and I memorized everything. The way his mouth molded to him and how he tasted minty fresh. Yes, tasted. We were French kissing. With no experience, I had no idea if I was doing it right. But I felt the beginning of a change in me. Even though I was on my guard, actually paying attention this time especially to the balm in case it didn’t work, I savored the moment. I pulled back, breathing hard searching Luke’s face to make sure he was ok. He completely looked fine if not a little astonished.
“Hi,” I said breathlessly with a grin.
He smiled back but with a question on his face. “Wow.”
Continuing to take charge, I took his hand from his side. He was completely mystified but allowed me pull him forward. This time, I led him towards the school. That was when I noticed we had an audience. Maggie and Brent both looked perplexed. That was strange. They were king and queen of sucking face in public places. I wasn’t sure where that look was coming from. When I saw Paul who was standing next to Flynn, they shared an expression of bewilderment and disapproval. I turned my head. I wouldn’t let them spoil this moment for me. It didn’t matter. For me it felt like my first kiss and I couldn’t wait to do it again.
After I’d gone to my locker, Luke walked me to class. Pulling me aside, he leaned in to kiss me again. Even though I wanted nothing more than to do just that, I couldn’t press my luck. I didn’t have a chance to reapply the balm.
Beg for Mercy - kindle edition v3 Page 10
