The Healer(The Healer Series Book 1)

by C. J. Anaya

Chapter Eighteen

  I sat up in bed fully awake with my heart pounding and my breath coming in short gasps. I couldn’t remember what I’d been dreaming about, but based on my elevated blood pressure it must have been one awesome nightmare. I looked across the room to see if I’d disturbed Angie. I should have known better than to worry. There wasn’t a noise on earth that was capable of waking Angie up before she was good and ready.

  “Bad dream?” a soft voice said from behind me.

  If I hadn’t been sitting down I’m sure I would have fallen over.

  I looked behind me toward the window and saw Tie’s silhouette outlined in the white moonlight. He was sitting down in the window seat with one leg on the ground and the other bent close to his chest, his hand resting lazily on top of his knee. His easy looking manner and the fact that he’d managed to startle me left me feeling totally irritated with him.

  “What are you doing in here?” I asked shortly.

  “I was checking up on you, sweetheart. Victor and I are taking turns keeping watch over you while everyone sleeps. No need to thank me. You’re entirely welcome.” His mocking tone never wavered.

  “Is it necessary that you be in here to do it? Can’t you just open the door, look in, and get lost?” I gave him my best you-don’t-have-any-effect-on-me-whatsoever look.

  Tie leaned his head back against the wall. I couldn’t see his facial expression very clearly, but I was pretty sure he was giving me one of his infuriating grins. Everything I did and said was amusing to him.

  “Why are you always so ready to pick a fight with me?” he asked. “You’re much more mild-mannered with Victor.”

  He said Victor’s name like it was a curse word.

  I stood up and walked over to the window seat, looking down at him so I could read his face a little easier.

  “What is the deal between you two?” I asked, deciding to play dumb. “When we were attacked by that nekomata you guys were comrades in arms. You seemed willing enough to look out for each other then, but at any other given time you’re throwing out these weird verbal digs. Makes me think you two are unwilling allies in all of this.”

  I held my breath, waiting to see if I could get Tie’s side of the story.

  His face became a blank mask. He didn’t look away from me, but he didn’t give me much to go on either.

  I sat down inside the window seat directly in front of him stubbornly refusing to leave until he answered my questions.

  The corners of his mouth turned up ever so slightly. It wasn’t much, but it was enough to let me know I was amusing him again.

  “You’re not at all like I thought you’d be,” he finally offered.

  “You’ve said that before. How did you think I would be?”

  “Well, most girls are completely enamored with the god of love and marriage. They can’t help themselves. In all fairness to them, I am a rather attractive individual.”

  “I don’t understand. Women who meet you fall in love with you?”

  “Not necessarily. As the god of love I’m made to look like the epitome of what a lover should look like. I’m the one that guides women to their soul mates. Stands to reason I’m one hot looking deity myself, don’t you think?” He raised his eyebrows at me daring me to contradict him. “You, however, intrigue me. You’re constantly giving me attitude.”

  “You thought I’d be totally enamored when I saw you?”

  “Yes, though part of that has to do with what happened in the past.”

  “What did happen?”

  I think Tie must have realized he was saying too much. His mouth closed into a thin line, and he folded his arms across his chest.

  “Look, Hope, if you remember the past, then great. You certainly have every right to know what happened to you, and what you’re really up against here.” He lifted his hand to my cheek rubbing his thumb softly along my cheek bone. His expression when he looked at me was sad and wistful.

  I wanted to lean into him. I wanted to keep this side of Tie, this open, honest part of him, all to myself. It ended all too soon, however. The softness in his look hardened, and he pulled back his hand like I’d burned it.

  “I can’t explain any of this to you, though. It’s not my job. It’s dear old Vicky’s. My job involves uniting two people meant for each other. That’s it. That’s all I’ll ever do.” He sounded depressed just thinking about it.

  I couldn’t help the next words that left my lips.

  “What if you fall in love with one of your subjects?”

  Tie’s face took on a hard edge.

  “It happened once, a very long time ago, and I actually cared enough to believe in it.” A muscle in his jaw started twitching.

  “Who was she?”

  Tie took a deep breath through the nose and gave me a sardonic smile.

  “No one of consequence. Let’s just say that kind of infatuation lasts about as long as it takes for me to orchestrate events leading them to their soul mates, and in truth they don’t usually see me at all except maybe as some handsome angel in their dreams.”

  I let out the breath I’d been holding. I was frustrated that Tie had avoided mentioning Edana specifically.

  “So you don’t really use a cherry blossom to make people fall in love with each other?”

  “Not all the time, but sometimes I do. There was one occasion in particular that stands out to me, but I can’t talk about it until you remember it.”

  I was sick of his cryptic remarks. It was all one big tease.

  “And when you came looking for me, you thought I would have the same reaction that other women have when they first meet you? You expected me to fall at your feet?”

  “Well, you certainly managed to fall at Victor’s,” he remarked snidely.

  “What are you talking about? I’m not in love with Victor.” I told myself to calm down. No need to get defensive.

  “I didn’t say you were in love with him. I’m just saying that was one heck of a kiss.”

  I was getting nowhere fast with him. I threw my hands up in the air and started to walk back to my bed.

  “At least Victor doesn’t think he’s god’s gift to women. He’s actually nice.”

  I heard a grunt come from Tie’s general direction and decided I wasn’t done with him yet. I turned around to face his arrogant frame.

  “You, however, seem to think rather highly of yourself. I bet you think you could get me to fall in love with you.”

  I was baiting him. I knew it was stupid, but he was so good at unnerving me, and my initial reaction each time he did so was to lash out at him in the most immature way imaginable. I wanted to unnerve him a little, but from what I could discern in the faint moonlight, it was having the opposite effect. His cocky smile continued growing as he stood up and shortened the distance between us.

  “Perhaps we should put your little theory to the test.” His voice sounded dangerous.

  I should have backed down and stepped away from him. It was obvious he knew something I didn’t. Instead of putting a little space between us I inched myself forward until my face was just a few centimeters from his.

  “Bring it,” I challenged.

  His smug smile seemed to get brighter the longer I stood there in front of him refusing to back down.

  He took a step back, breaking the intense moment between us and tapped his finger on his chin as if he were pondering something very serious.

  “You know, I’ve never used any of my own romantic ideas for myself. I’ve always been too busy getting other people together.” He sounded slightly bitter. “But a challenge has been issued and you have accepted. Victor won’t like it one bit, but it looks like we are officially courting.” He rubbed his hands together in anticipation of the warrior god’s explosive reaction.

  He sounded so delighted with himself I had to laugh.

  “Courting? You really are ancient aren’t you? It sounds a little old fashioned to me.”

  “Does it?” He regained
that half step and then some, getting closer to me and studying me with his beautiful blue eyes. They didn’t seem as icy as they had before. “I think the old fashioned way of doing things is really what a woman wants. Chivalry. Gentlemanly behavior. Chicks seem to dig it.”

  I couldn’t help but smile at his light-hearted remark.

  “I’m not just a chick. You’re going to have to figure out how to worm your way into my heart. Good luck with that.”

  Tie’s lighthearted mood seemed to dampen with my comment. The ice in his eyes returned, and a dangerous glint stealthily crept into them.

  “I think I may have just the thing to start off this courting challenge,” he said coldly.

  Before I could get a grip on his mood swing, Tie slowly produced from behind his back, a flower. It was completely black to the point of looking charcoal. It seemed to pulsate with its own life-like energy, and even though I knew I had nothing to fear from Tie, I was afraid of this. Despite the danger I sensed, I wanted to reach out and examine its dark beauty. I hesitantly reached my hand forward to touch it, but then I pulled back. Tie managed to look disappointed and relieved all at the same time. He was so confusing.I just couldn’t read him, but this was Tie’s game, and I wasn’t about to slip up.

  “What’s that supposed to be?” I tried to sound disinterested. I failed miserably.

  “This is supposed to be a cherry blossom.” His response was like acid on my nerves. I felt anger and hatred building in his gaze. It made me nervous so I tried saying something flippant.

  “You’re giving me a dead flower? You’ve really never had to work at this, have you?”

  “For the record, this flower isn’t dead. It’s a very rare bloom called the Black Cherry Blossom. Women are all about tokens and symbols when they begin falling in love with someone. Isn’t giving a rare flower to the woman I’m courting a kind of symbol of how rare our love might be also?”

  His mocking tone made this situation laughable. I couldn’t understand where his motivation was coming from or what he was really feeling in regards to us being an actual item. It honestly felt like he was just trying to be cruel.

  “Do you see me swooning?” I folded my arms over my chest defensively and tapped my foot. “Nothing says romance like a burnt flower. What’s so special about this?”

  “Take it and examine it. You might be surprised at its deceptive beauty.”

  I looked at the flower again, and wondered if I should really accept his lame token of affection or even continue what I knew was just a way for Tie to get back at Victor. Tie’s eyes flashed one confusing emotion after another, and even though he was the one offering me such a rare and special flower I got the distinct impression that he was silently pleading for me to refuse it.

  Taking that flower would be giving him a leg up on this weird little challenge we’d struck with one another. If I wanted to prove I was immune to his charms I needed to be the one setting the conditions, and I needed to make sure they were the kind of conditions that would ensure me a win. Before he had time to anticipate me, I batted the blossom away with the back of my hand and got right in his face.

  He looked to the floor where the flower had landed and then watched as it disappeared. I could have sworn I heard him let out a sigh of relief.

  “You seem to think one kiss from Victor was all it took to get me to fall for him,” I said pointing my finger in his chest.

  “Do you deny you were into it?”

  “All I’m saying is this: If you really want to prove something here, don’t hand me a withered old flower and expect me to beg for an engagement ring. Put your money where your mouth is and kiss me.”

  Daring Tie to kiss me wasn’t necessarily the brightest idea I’d ever had nor was it my normal MO. Nope. This move had Angie written all over it. However, I knew Tie was only interested in making passes at me if Victor was present. There was no way he was going to actually attempt something as physical as this if his intended audience was nowhere in sight.

  And so I dared him to kiss me.

  Yep.

  So many unbelievable and bizarre things had happened to me tonight, I think I figured this was simply par for the course. Taking in Tie’s expression made me think my impulsive challenge had actually been a good one. He had not been expecting this. His calm façade had slipped, and he actually looked nervous. I decided to press my advantage and enjoy it as much as possible.

  “Uh oh. Are we out of practice, Tie? So busy finding love for other people we don’t remember how to do it for ourselves?” I teased ruthlessly. “Better luck next time.”

  I turned around and headed for my bed wearing my own smug little smile. I’d been right all along. He wouldn’t touch me without his oldest enemy present.

  Before I’d taken two steps, I felt his arms surround me possessively. I might have attempted to struggle, but I was too stunned by the sensation of his warm, moist lips slowly kissing the tender side of my neck. I should have put up some kind of resistance, but my body was not cooperating with me.

  What was happening? This hadn’t been the plan at all!

  Instead of pushing away from him, I couldn’t help but tilt my head to the side as he continued his slow assault down the length of my neck toward my shoulder. He grabbed my waist and turned me roughly to face him. His eyes were stormy with a need I couldn’t even begin to understand. He cupped the sides of my face in his hands and crushed my lips to his. A soft moan escaped my mouth. My reaction to him was explosive. I wrapped my arms around his shoulders and held him as tightly as he was holding me.

  His kisses were aggressive and demanding, filling up every lonely space I hadn’t known existed. It was all so familiar and peaceful and turbulent and crazy. I could actually feel something powerful happening between us--something building that hadn’t been there with Victor.

  Then an amazing thing happened. Our life forces connected to one another, and my mind was seeing beautiful warm tones of yellow, gold and orange. They invited me in, beckoning me to stay, to never part from them again. I searched his heart, looking for the old ache that had been there previously, but I couldn’t find it anywhere. It seemed to have vanished along with any trace of the pain he’d been holding onto. Instead, what I could feel him holding onto was me. Tie’s spirit held me close and claimed me for his own. I didn’t put up a fight. I didn’t want to fight it anymore. I just wanted to stay warm and loved and happy.

  As I accepted this connection with all of my heart he broke away from me abruptly, severing the joining of our spirits in the process. It was surprisingly painful. Neither one of us spoke for several seconds. I think we were both surprised by what those kisses had revealed.

  Tie looked like someone had taken his whole world and turned it upside down. He began pacing the room back and forth. He would stop to look at me for one brief second, and in that second I would see fear, disbelief, worry, and even love pouring out of his piercing blue eyes. He finally stopped in front of me and grabbed my shoulders hard.

  “That wasn’t supposed to happen. It isn’t possible. It can’t be possible. It goes against everything I’ve ever been told.”

  “Tie, what are you talking about? What’s so impossible about the idea of us kissing?”

  He gave me a frightened look and shook me as he spoke.

  “Tell me…” he stopped talking. He looked like he was swallowing back a slew of unfamiliar emotions. “Tell me I’m not the only one who felt that, Hope. Tell me I’m not the only one who saw that.” He was sounding more and more desperate.

  I’d known for some time that I had feelings for Tie, but I wasn’t expecting his kisses to reveal to me how strong they were. It was like everything had been magnified and now there really was no way to deny exactly how I felt about him.

  “Do you mean the connection we made? The colors we created together?”

  He let go of me, running his hands through his hair.

  “Amazing. You did feel it. It wasn’t just me. This is real. This
is really happening.” He looked like he didn’t know whether to be ecstatic or completely freaked out.

  “Of course, I felt it. I’ve never experienced anything like it.”

  I stepped toward him, afraid he was trying to put distance between us. I didn’t want him to distance himself from me ever again, but he held up his hands warding me off.

  “You never felt this with Victor?” He looked like he was afraid to hear the answer. “I saw you two kissing outside earlier.” He had a hard time looking at me when he said that. “Your life force didn’t connect with his?”

  “Absolutely not. You’re the only person I’ve ever connected to like that. The colors were just as amazing and wonderful as they were the first time I connected to you.”

  Tie lowered his hands looking dumbfounded.

  “This has happened before?”

  “Two times before, actually. Once at the nurse’s station, and a second time when I was healing you from that stab wound.”

  Tie crossed over to me in one long stride and wrapped his arms around me.

  “That can’t be true. I didn’t notice it before. Why didn’t I see it?”

  “Maybe you weren’t ready to.”

  “What?”

  “Tie, your heart was pretty damaged even before that sword did a number on it.”

  “What do you mean it was damaged?”

  “There was an injury there. Something dark and hateful you were still holding onto. It was preventing me from healing you completely. I think when we kissed our life forces were able to correct it together. It isn’t there anymore.”

  He put his hand to his heart and held perfectly still.

  “You’re right. It isn’t there anymore, and it was supposed to be permanent. Everything’s changing so fast, and I have no idea what to do about it.”

  I watched Tie. He held his hand to his heart and looked at me, but his mind was elsewhere.

  “Why is this so significant, and why was your heart supposed to be damaged permanently? I’m so sick of having absolutely no idea what you’re talking about.” I put my hands on my hips and tapped my foot in frustration. “So help me, Tie, you are going to answer my questions, and you are going to answer them now because if you don’t I’ll do something absolutely deplorable.”

  My words broke Tie from his chaotic musings long enough for him to take in my seriously pissed stance. Then he smiled. I’d never seen him smile so big.

  He wrapped his arms around me again and rested his chin on my forehead.

  “You’re incapable of deplorable acts.”

  “I swear I’ll sic Angie on you.”

  His laughter made my heart feel lighter than ever.

  “Connecting to someone like that hardly ever happens because most people don’t use their life force the way we do. That’s why I have the job that I have. I have to help people recognize who their soul mates are, and that’s what the cherry blossoms are for. They open eyes and seal souls together. You and I don’t need a cherry blossom to have our eyes opened. We already understand ourselves and our spirits. We can recognize the connection and the colors we make together.”

  My eyes widened as realization set in.

  “Are you saying we’re…”

  “Soul mates,” he finished.

  Then he looked scared.

  “Kiss me again, Hope. I need to know this wasn’t just some cruel joke or strange fluke or…”

  I didn’t let him finish his sentence. If he wanted me to kiss him, I was more than happy to oblige. I didn’t attack his lips. I wanted to enjoy the moment for what it was. A tender moment between two people who were just starting to discover something wonderful happening between them. I didn’t know what this meant for us in the future, but I fully believed in what was happening to us right now.

  The energy I felt before began building again and our connection was even more explosive than it had been the first time. The warmth I was experiencing seemed to take hold of every cell in my body. I was awash in a quiet storm of colors, each one wrapping around my spirit and completing parts of me that hadn’t been whole in literally hundreds of years. My mind seemed to expand and then open. I felt memories from my previous life begin to rise to the surface, but before I could reach out and take hold of them I felt my connection to Tie being severed again.

  I pulled back and looked at Tie questioningly, but he wasn’t looking at me. He was looking over me. I turned around, and there, standing behind me was a totally enraged Victor.

  “Tie? What is going on?” Victor asked.

  Tie’s eyes never left mine, but his whole demeanor changed right before me. His lips lifted into a cold sneer and his eyebrows raised condescendingly.

  “Our little healer had a bit of a nightmare. She was thrashing around so much I was afraid she might do some damage to the bed frame or possibly herself. I thought I’d wake her up by giving her something pleasant to dream about.”

  “And the only thing you could think of was molesting the girl I’m supposed to marry?” Victor’s voice seemed to echo off the bedroom walls.

  Tie took a side step and came up from behind me, planting himself between me and Victor while giving my hand an encouraging squeeze in the process. It was that minimal hand contact that let me know he wasn’t messing with me. He was trying to protect me.

  From what?

  “I figured it was the most enjoyable way of convincing her that there is no bogeyman,” he said in that lazy voice of his.

  “There may be no bogeyman, but I think a killer cat who is capable of turning itself into Mr. Fairmont is a hell of a lot scarier,” said Angie from the corner of the room.

  I turned to her in surprise, realizing she didn’t sound a bit sleepy. From the look on her face I could tell she hadn’t been sleeping for quite some time.

  Fabulous.