A Crown of Blood and Bone: Paranormal Romance (The Shadow Walkers Saga Book 1)

by Sloane Murphy

  “No, I’m not sick,” I sigh.

  “Then what the fuck has been going on since last weekend? You’ve not answered your phone except from this morning, I’ve barely heard from you,” he says, just standing by the door with his arms folded.

  “Maybe you should come sit.” I motion to the sofa, and he stomps his way over and sits on the lone chair rather than with me. This sucks, but I guess it’s better that he’s angry. It’ll be easier for him this way.

  "So?" he says, and much as it pisses me off, I swallow it. This is my fault after all, I can't be angry that he's annoyed and very obviously angry at me already.

  "So... We need to talk. I didn't mean to avoid you, not really, but I needed some time to think about everything," I tell him, trying to stop my voice wobbling. "I know we had all these plans, but this isn't working for me Jack. Not anymore. The tension between you and my family, us moving away, me becoming a doctor. I feel like I've lost myself to the life you want us to have. I thought it was what I wanted too, but after everything that's been going on, I realized that this isn't the life I want."

  "This isn't the life you want?" he says quietly, and I look up to see him staring at me as if he doesn't even know me, and I shake my head.

  "I thought it was, I did, and I never wanted to hurt you, but I can't do this anymore Jack. I love you, I do, but I don't think we're right for each other. I've realized that we want such different things from life, and no matter how much I love you, I can't just leave my family behind. I can’t cut them out of my life as if they don't exist because you guys don't get on."

  "So, this is about them?"

  "No, this is about us, but they are a part of me Jack, and you don't accept them. You can barely stand being around them. But I don't want to talk about that. I'm talking about us."

  "Well, it doesn't sound like there is an us anymore, Remy. It sounds like you've made that decision alone already, and it doesn't matter a flying fuck what I think, or how I feel about it." He stands, almost shaking, and I can feel the waves of anger radiating from him.

  "I'm sorry, Jack. I don't ever want to hurt you."

  "You know what, Remy? Fuck you. If you didn't want to hurt me, you wouldn't be doing this. Shattering our life, all of the plans we built. You should have realized long before now what you really wanted. Or you should have at least had the decency to talk it out with me before you made a decision alone. So, fuck you, fuck this, fuck all of it," he spits, holding his hand out to me, and I place the ring in his palm.

  "I really am sorry, Jack, but this is for the best. For us both, even if you don't see if right now." I tell him as he storms across the room. "Your key is on the counter, and that box on the floor is the few bits you've left here."

  He pulls his keys from his pocket and wrenches my key from it before slamming it down on the counter, picking up his own along with his box.

  "Fuck you, Remy!" he shouts, before leaving my apartment, and slamming the door closed.

  Tears run down my face, but I know no matter how much this hurts, no matter how much my heart feels like I just shattered it to pieces, this is the right decision.

  Now I just need to pick up the pieces of my shattered life and get on with it, but first, I need my best friend and about three pints of chocolate ice cream.

  After a full day of pity partying to myself, I give in and text Fallon to tell her I broke up with Jack. She responded immediately saying she was grabbing supplies and heading over. That was twenty minutes ago, and I'm still in the same spot I was in on the sofa that I was when Jack left earlier.

  I hear the lock turn, and Fallon saunters into my apartment like it’s her own, placing her bags on my counter before kicking the door shut and turning to me. "You get tonight to pity party, and then tomorrow, we are back on track, you hear me?"

  "But Fal, I just..." I say, my voice rasps from the crying I've done throughout the day before breaking.

  "I know sugar," she says coming over and hugging me tightly. "Tell me all about it."

  She's interrupted by a knock at the door and stands. "That must be the pizza guy, so hold that thought!"

  She hurries to the door and takes the pizza from the guy, flirting as she does, tipping him before she closes the door. I watch as she potters about the kitchen, grabbing glasses, putting more ice cream in my freezer, before grabbing the other bag and the pizza before coming back to me. I feel so pathetic just sitting here like my life is ending, but I can't help it. This might have been my choice, my decision, but that doesn't make it any easier. Not really.

  The smell of cheese hits me as she puts the boxes down on the coffee table, then pulls out a bottle of whiskey and pours us both a glass. She hands me mine as I reach for the top pizza box and pull out a giant slice.

  "So, let’s try this again. Tell me what happened."

  I sigh and chew the deliciousness that is my cheesy slice. "I'm not even sure where to begin, but I ended it. I told him that this isn't the life for me, that we're on different paths, and that it wasn't going to work. He was so hurt, so angry, and I just, I can see it, his heart breaking at my words, the rage it created. I never wanted to hurt him."

  "So, you made your choice, huh?" she says and my gaze whips to her.

  "What??" She can't know, Dad said humans don't know. Oh shit, did I say something I shouldn't? My mind races through every conversation we've had since I found out when she laughs.

  "Stop freaking out. Yes, I know what you are, I've known our whole lives. Yes, you can be pissed at me too, god knows Creek was. But yeah, I know your secret."

  "How the fuck? What the... I am so fucking confused right now, Fallon." I open and close my mouth a few times, trying to form the right words but nothing comes out, so I take a swig of the whiskey, the burn comforting as my world shifts again.

  "So, since it’s a day for revelations, you should probably know, I'm a witch," she says with a small smile and takes a drink of her own, emptying her glass.

  "You're a witch?" I ask, stunned. How is this even my life right now?

  "Surprise!" she says, throwing her hands in the air, making fucking jazz hands, like this isn't a big deal. "But I'm what you guys would call a good witch. My family has worked with yours since the beginning of our line."

  "You mean, everyone else knows? I have so many questions, and yet, no fucking words. Was everyone in my life hiding stuff from me?" I say, my mind blown. Was I keeping the Hunter stuff from her? Yes, but I'd probably have caved at some point and told her anyway. Her being a witch makes a lot of things make more sense, but holy fucking shit. "I know, it’s a lot. Especially after everything you've obviously found out in the last few weeks, but we can't reveal ourselves to humans, and if you'd have made the decision to reject your Hunter heritage, you'd have left me behind too when you left with Jack. I couldn't have told you, no matter how many times I've tried. It’s a spell, it binds us from revealing who we are to those who are not of the factions, or those who are unaware, or make the choice to not live this life. It sounds more complicated than it is, and I didn't meant to just dump this on you, when you have so much going on, but I hated having secrets from you." She smiles sadly at me, and I realize that all of these secrets must have weighed heavily on those around me. They suck for me, but it couldn't have been all fun and games for them either.

  "Wow. So, you're a witch? You can do magic and shit?"

  "I can do magic and shit," she laughs shaking her head. "But there's limits and restrictions on what we can do. There are others, who don't abide by the rules of the coven council, those who fell on the side of the Dracul, and the Lycans, and then there are those who go to whoever pays the most money, who have no respect for the power we wield or its consequences, but yes, I can do magic and shit."

  "This is... it’s so cool, and yet, kinda terrifying that I have been walking around blindered all this time not having any real idea of what was happening in the world around me."

  "I know, but no more blinders for you. Now how about
we eat our own weight in this pizza and get stinking drunk to ease your very obvious broken heart and we talk about all of this tomorrow, when the hangover is rife, but I have a little something something to ease it," she says and winks at me.

  "That sounds kind of amazing," I say with a small sniffle, thinking about Jacks face again as I told him what I did. "It hurts, Fal. I didn't want to hurt him, but how could I make any other choice?"

  "I know sugar, I know. It will get better. Love is the one thing that rules all of us, faction or human, and the matters of the heart are one thing that no spell can heal. But you did the right thing. If the stories I've heard about the fearless Remy Bennett are anything to go by, you might have just turned the tide in the war we're facing."

  "There are stories?" I ask, shaking my head, because how is this my reality right now.

  "There are, but until your memories are back, which is going to take a while, I can't say shit. Sorry."

  I shake my head and wave at her nonsense. "It's fine, you're not the first, and you won't be the last I'm sure. I don't understand it all, but I am so glad that you know, that I have someone other than the guys to speak to, because everything, all of it, is just so freaking much!"

  "Oh, I know, and you don't know the half of it yet. Now, how about we put on Dear John, stuff ourselves with this pizza and pity party right?" she laughs and takes a giant bite from the pizza slice in her hand. I laugh at her, and I know I made the right choice in asking her over. There is no one quite like your best friend to help heal a broken heart.

  Nine

  “Remy, for fuck sake. This isn’t hard, you just need to relax,” Bauer huffs as I bend over, trying to catch my breath. Eight hours I’ve been at his place, which I’m now renaming, because this place isn’t his house, its fucking Hell. “Just because this is easy for you, you jerk. You’ve been doing this for a lot longer than I have,” I pant.

  “Actually, no. You’ve had more lives than I have, you’ve done this a hell of a lot more than I have. You just need to give in to it. Your instincts will kick in if you let them, if you stop with the overthinking!” I glare at him and drop to the floor.

  “I don’t know how to do that, Bauer. I get it, you’re frustrated, but guess what, me fucking too. This, all of it, to you might not be weird, but you have your memories back, you’ve had years to adjust to it all. I’ve had a few freaking weeks, and I still have none of my memories. Except for fragments, that are either dreams or memories, but I’ll be fucked if I know the difference at this point. But this, the fighting, this is all new to me right now. You can’t treat me like some honed warrior, even if I was before, because that’s not who I am right now.” I raise my head and stare at the ceiling of his basement torture chamber and try to even out my breathing.

  I know I’m a dancer and might run most days, even if I’ve been slacking a bit lately, but this kind of training, this is a whole new world. Circuits, skipping, cardio, and that was his god damn warm up. Then he gave me the stupid wooden staff I threw to the floor a few minutes ago and attacked me. Hoping my instincts would just kick in. When it was obvious it wasn’t happening, we tried all sorts of combinations, and while I’m better than I was when we started, I’m not learning as quick as he hoped.

  As in, I’m not an instant fucking badass.

  The urge to roll my eyes is real at his obvious disappointment.

  “Remy, I never expected you to be who you’ve always been, I don’t know what I expected.” He sighs and runs a hand down his face before sitting opposite me on the floor.

  “It’s weird. I’m always the eldest, and yet, you taught me most of what I know. Where you’ve had like twelve lives, I’m on my sixth. You are the best of us, at least any of us that I’ve ever met, and you’ve always just picked up where you left off. I can’t say much more than that, because, well, it could still be dangerous, but something feels different this time. You’re different.”

  “Of course, I am jackass. I had a whole life that I just blew up so that I could be this person. From what Maddie said, that’s unusual. But this life has shaped me. Losing Mom changed me. I don’t know if we lost her this early in other lives yet, so I can’t say for sure. I will get there, I’m positive, once my memories are back, but for now, treat me like an absolute moron with this stuff. Please, I freaking beg you. Eight-hour work outs are not usually my life.” I laugh and lie back on the mats covering the ground.

  "Oh, believe me, I can see that, and despite the ritual not happening for another few weeks, you'll thank me for this beforehand. Your body is already starting to change, the Angel blood is awakening, you're stronger, faster, more lethal. Honing your skills, even with just the basics before the memories come back will be good. It means that when you remember how to do what you used to do, that your body won't be working against you. Unfortunately, the muscle memory isn't something that carries over. Just the knowledge, so you still need to train."

  "Ugh, this sucks, why can't I just wake up a total badass," I groan and he laughs at me.

  "Because that would be far too easy. And a Hunter’s life is anything but easy. That was the first rule you taught me. That this life is hard, but there are so many things that make this life worth the insanity it brings." He stands and smiles down at me offering me a hand up. "That being said, get your ass up off my floor, you caught your breath, so now we start again."

  "Sadist. You're a god damn sadist," I hiss as I take his hand and he helps pull me to my feet.

  "Yes, yes I am. Which is why I'm the best teacher you'll have. Dad doesn't have the patience, Colt would baby you and Creek, well, he's Creek. Its why I always train you when I'm about. You're just as much of a sadist as I am, Rem. You'll see." He winks at me and throws the staff back at me. "Now get yourself into the starting stance. We've not leaving here until you disarm me or pin me. Time to up your game."

  I take the stance he showed me hours ago and prepare myself. Taking deep breaths, I steady my heartbeat and try to focus on the new things I discovered I can do, like the sharper sight, the insane hearing, the ridiculous speed, when I can tap into it anyway.

  I hear him take a breath a second before he launches towards me and I do what he asked. I don't think, I just do. I raise the staff as he brings his in an arc over his head and I meet his blow. The force of it shakes my arms, but I just grin at him before pulling back and trying to go offensive rather than the defensive stance I've been in all morning.

  He laughs as I parry back, using the movements he taught me, with a flair of my own that when I quiet the voices in my head, comes through. Who would've thought he'd be right? Maybe I should pay more attention to him. I laugh when my offensive makes him take a step or so backwards, before a lethal smile graces his face and I see the moment he decides to stop pulling punches.

  Apparently, even though he wants me trained, my big brother does not want me to beat his ass, at least not yet. Not that there's much risk of that, but I just know I got too cocky, and now I'm going to hurt. A lot.

  Faster than I thought possible, he strikes and despite my new speed, I have absolutely nothing on Bauer, and I end up on my back, winded with the end of his staff grazing my throat.

  "Nearly." He winks at me and pulls back the staff. "Definitely an improvement. I could almost see when you stopped overthinking."

  I sit up and try to catch my breath again. "This is a severely unfair advantage you have."

  "Humbling, isn't it?" he laughs "Come on. Again."

  "Slave driver," I grumble and get to my feet again.

  "You're damn straight I am. I told you, we quit when you pin me or disarm me. The rest is up to you."

  I almost growl as I drop into the starting stance, holding the staff a little differently to what he showed me, and far more comfortably. "Bring it, asshole."

  He laughs at me, and for a second, I think I've bitten off more than I can chew but I see him feint right as I drop and swipe at his ankles with my staff. He jumps backwards before I can make contact, but t
he hesitation is enough that I have time to catch him with a blow to his ribs, dropping him to one knee. I lunge again, hoping to win, just once, but I should have known better. I jump into the air, but am pushed backward by a powerful force and fly back into the padded wall before I slide down to my ass.

  "Don't get so cocky, Remy. Cold and calculating is what will keep you alive in this world of ours. Cocky and hot headed will get you dead real quick. You had a dozen other ways you could have attacked but you picked to try and showboat. This is not a competition; this is life or death. Yours, mine, our families, hell every family alive." his voice shakes, and I'm not sure if its anger, disappointment or adrenaline, but regardless, I'm flooded with guilt and shame. He's right. I just wanted to win, to make it stop. I wasn't thinking about anything else, and considering what was at stake, I was being a foolish child about it.

  Maybe I would be better off not knowing all of this, but this is my life now, and I'm going to embrace it if it’s the last damned thing I ever manage to do.

  After the hardest, and most thrilling work out of my entire life, I’m sprawled out on the floor in Bauer’s basement, trying to work out what my new life is going to look like. How it’s even going to work. I'm going to need a new job, because god knows that working in a bar every night probably isn't going to work, and my excuse of being sick isn't going to last much longer either before they decide to fire my ass.

  Bauer left me to my aches, pains and musings about twenty minutes ago after Colt called. I didn't bother asking what it was about because the look on Bauer’s face was enough to shut my mouth. My biggest brother isn't exactly the most talkative of people on a good day, though knowing what I know now, it makes a lot more sense. He's way older than me, which means he's had to tread carefully with his words around us all for a while. I can't even imagine how hard that must have been, how alone he must have felt being the only one. I know he had Dad, Maddie and Nate, but when we were younger, Bauer, Colt, Creek and I were almost inseparable. Then Bauer grew up and left the three of us to it, which meant that Colt and I were thick as thieves even at home, with Bauer on the outside.