Lake Hill

by Margareta Osborn

  ‘It all goes in cycles, mate,’ he told Rick. ‘Stuff happens to us we don’t understand, so we keep goin’ back to it time and time again to try and make sense of it. And when we finally do, we can lay it to rest.’

  ‘How did that work for you and Lottie?’ Rick asked.

  The old man shook his head. ‘I’ve thought about that a lot. Tried to work it out. I’ve come to the conclusion that Lottie missed Matthias so bad, she didn’t want to change anything. Livin’ in the past like that allowed her to stay with him. Right up until the moment she died and they could be together again.’

  How sad that was, Rick thought. Lottie had spent her whole life wishing for something she could never have.

  ‘Don’t be like Lottie, Ricardo.’

  Chapter 33

  A few mornings later, Julia finally forced herself out of bed. In her wanderings around the property at night when there was no risk of running into anyone, she had made a decision. She would pack up and leave. Put Lake Hill Cafe on the market, and send for the rest of her stuff once the place sold.

  Maybe she’d head to Broome or Darwin; as far away from her past as she could get. She was strong. She could do this. She’d done it before – picked herself up and created a new life. She could do it again. Surely? You had to take one step after the other, she remembered.

  On the way, she’d visit Springvale cemetery. Say goodbye to her daughter.

  After showering and dressing, she found her phone and called Montana. When the girl answered, Julia said quickly, ‘I want to sell the cafe.’

  ‘What the hell for? It’s going well.’

  ‘I’m leaving.’

  ‘No way! You stay right there, I’m coming round.’ And the girl was gone.

  Julia slumped. This was exactly what she didn’t want. Now she’d made the decision to go, she didn’t want to be swayed by anyone. She couldn’t afford for her resolution to crumble. Not again.

  An hour or so later, gravel crunched on the drive. Then came the sound of feet echoing across the verandah. Too many feet for just one person, even one as noisy as Montana.

  Before she had time to wonder, Montana was bursting into the room. Followed by Ernie and Charlie, with Bluey and Jean and Harry and his wife Susan bringing up the rear.

  ‘You are not leaving,’ said Montana. ‘We love you and we’re not going to let you go.’

  She threw her arms around Julia, clinging on tightly. Julia held herself rigid in the girl’s embrace, not sure what to say or do.

  Ernie had taken his cap off and was turning it incessantly in his hands. Charlie stood holding his green handbag, looking bashful but offering a tentative smile.

  Bluey and Jean had brought trays of food, and Susan was carrying an esky.

  ‘What on earth are you all doing?’ Julia asked, untangling herself from Montana and staring wide-eyed at them all.

  There was one person missing, but she could hardly expect him to be here. She hadn’t expected anyone to be here.

  ‘What’s going on?’ she asked Harry, who was in civvies instead of his uniform.

  ‘Young Montana here thought we should all come and have a bit of a get-together. A wake of sorts for young Chloe.’

  He stopped and took in her whole face, checking it was all okay. She appreciated that.

  ‘We’re all very sorry about this business,’ he went on. ‘Not good at all. And Montana says you’re thinking of leaving. Can’t have that, can we? You’re an important part of the community now.’

  ‘And we’re running another dog school at the Grange,’ broke in Montana. ‘We need you to do the catering.’

  ‘But more to the point,’ said Charlie, ‘if you go, where am I gunna get a good coffee? Rick’s is shit.’

  ‘Have you seen that brother of mine lately?’ asked Montana. She had followed Julia out onto the verandah, as she’d left the room to get some air, away from the others.

  ‘No, I haven’t.’ Julia didn’t want to talk about Rick right now. Even the thought of him made her tummy dive into free-fall. He was never going to forgive her. She hadn’t seen nor heard from him for days. Not since he’d left the cafe with Harry after finding out their daughter was dead. He was obviously gone from her life for good.

  Montana was opening her mouth again to speak as though she was going to pursue the topic of Rick so Julia quickly jumped in, ‘How are you and Ernie going? Are you sorting out how your new father–daughter relationship is going to work?’ Just like Rick and Chloe should have been able to do. Oh God. It was around every corner, the reminder of everything she’d lost.

  ‘Awesome! Ernie, it turns out, loves dogs. That must be where I got it from! He’s going to give me a hand training my new pups. We can learn together, he said. He’s been looking for a new interest since he’s retired.’ At Julia’s slight frown, she raced on, ‘Oh, he’s still going to help cook for you and everything, but I think he’s lonely up there in his villa at the caravan park. He’s looking for something else to do. Owen doesn’t like the dogs much so I can’t talk to him about their training. That’s why it’s so exciting Ernie’s coming on board. We can do it together. Even though I grew up with Ernie, it’ll be great to get to know him from this new perspective, you know, now I know he’s my proper dad and all.’ She trailed off. Grimaced. Appeared flustered then upset.

  Julia was nodding, trying to be happy for Montana. For Ernie.

  ‘Oh geez, Julia,’ Montana burst out, ‘look, I’m really sorry about the whole Lauren thing. She seemed okay but … yeah, to trick you like that? It was really low. And then to find out about Chloe? I can’t even imagine how that must feel. I can’t believe I actually had a niece. That you and Rick …’

  Tears were now rolling down Montana’s cheeks. ‘But listen, you just need to give that bull-headed brother of mine some time to process it all. He’ll soon realise what an amazing thing he has going with you. You just have to see yourselves together. The connection is like that bluetooth thingo I’m supposed to have going with my dogs! Gosh, if I had that with Owen …’ Montana trailed off. Gulped. Tried again. ‘All I’m saying is he’d be insane to let you go.’ She threw her arms around Julia and hugged her tight.

  Julia could feel the wetness of Montana’s tears on her own cheeks.

  ‘Hey. What are ya both doing outside?’ Bluey. Coming to find them. ‘Ya gotta come back in here, Julia, and tell these buggers that I do a beautiful breakfast at the pub. They seem to think I can’t cook now old Ernie here has spoiled them with the grub from the cafe.’

  Montana drew back, wiped her eyes.

  ‘See, we all need you, Julia.’

  ‘Sure bloody do,’ added Bluey. ‘C’mon. Let’s get you both a drink.’

  An hour later after she had another wine in one hand and a sandwich in the other – all provided by Jean – Julia gazed around at her mates, the people who had come to mean so much to her in a short time; they were all drinking and laughing. All here for her. And yet despite their love and good intentions she felt so separate. So removed. She moved to the bench to surreptitiously dispose of her food and tip her wine down the sink.

  ‘How ya travellin’, mate?’ said a quiet voice at her side. Charlie. Looking concerned.

  ‘Do you ever get over losing those you love, Charlie?’

  The old man lent against the counter and thought for a moment. ‘Nup,’ he said, finally. ‘Ya don’t. You just learn to live with it. And those holes in your heart, the ones losing someone ya love make? They go where you go, so there’s no use running away either.’

  She nodded slowly.

  A firm hand came down on her shoulder. ‘You stay here with us, mate. We’ll look after ya.’

  Chapter 34

  Rick had driven through the night to Melbourne in the hope that the police would let him talk to Lauren Woodward. But at the last minute he changed his mind. Lauren Woodward didn’t deserve any more attention. Using his mobile he dialled directory assistance. Managed to get a number for a Mr D Perue in Box
Hill. He’d go see Chloe’s stepfather instead, if the man agreed to talk to him.

  He did, which was surprising. Rick found the address reasonably easily, and the house, although old, proved to be large and well kept. When Derek Perue opened the door, Rick saw an elderly man with a receding hairline, whose hazel eyes were haunted and watery.

  ‘I’m Rick Halloran, Mr Perue. Chloe’s biological father. I rang you earlier?’

  Derek nodded and stepped back, indicating for Rick to follow him down a long dark hall. A number of bedrooms led off the hall, one of them, Rick glimpsed through the half-open door, decorated in pink and white.

  They sat down in a fancy living-room at the back of the home, where light drenched every corner. Rick saw photos all around the room, every one of them showing a woman and her daughter.

  ‘What do you want to know, Mr Halloran?’ Derek Perue’s voice was gravelly.

  Rick wondered what to say to this man who seemed immersed in grief. ‘Everything, Derek. Anything you want to tell me.’

  ‘Sylvia loved to travel,’ Derek began, ‘and she was comfortably off so was able to take Chloe with her all around the world.’

  He gestured to the photos, and Rick saw now that many of them had been taken in different parts of the world: Disneyland, some tropical island, China, even Antarctica, by the looks of it.

  ‘I met them on a cruise,’ Derek explained. ‘It was love at first sight. I couldn’t believe my luck at finding someone as nice as Sylvia on my second time round, such a shy, lovely woman. And Chloe? Well, she was beautiful. The perfect stepdaughter. I loved her as much as I do my own kids.’

  Rick could see the man meant every word. Death often made people remember only the good things about loved ones, but even if Derek’s memories were only half-true, Rick could see that his daughter had been adored.

  ‘She was a scumbag kid, that Lauren Woodward. Chloe met her at the library and they became friends. We should’ve stopped it right there, changed libraries or something, but we thought it would be good for Chloe to see another side of life. Understand how privileged she was to live the way she did. Stupid, stupid, stupid.’ He knocked at his head as he said the last words. ‘Anyway, Lauren introduced our Chloe to this young fellow at the beach. Sylvia and I thought … well, he was highly inappropriate. We banned her from seeing him, but Lauren encouraged her to go against us and helped her sneak out to see him. It was that bastard who introduced Chloe to the drugs, the ice.’ He leaned forward and took Rick’s clasped hands. ‘We tried to help Chloe, you have to understand that.’

  Rick nodded. He couldn’t speak.

  ‘Then Sylvia got sick with the cancer. She died.’ Derek paused, swallowing back his emotion. ‘I warned Chloe to stop using, and sent her to the best rehabilitation place I could afford. That worked for a while, but then she got back with this fellow and that was the end of it. I threatened to toss her out on her ear, hoping that would make her see sense. She didn’t. So I did it, I threw her out, hoping that hitting rock bottom might make her turn her life around.’

  The man’s voice broke. He started to cry. Rick didn’t know what to do. He wanted to cry himself. Finally Derek pulled out a handkerchief and mopped up his tears, blew his nose.

  His voice when it came was hollow and full of grief. ‘She slept rough on the street for six months. Then … the overdose, and she died.’

  Rick felt old. Very, very old. The same thing could have happened to Montana if he hadn’t come home to look after her. It could happen to any vulnerable soul.

  ‘So when did you find out about Chloe?’ Derek finally asked.

  ‘Two days ago.’

  ‘Right.’

  ‘Julia was only seventeen when she had her. She didn’t have a job or any money to support herself. No family on her side – and her father an abusive bastard. She thought she was doing the right thing.’

  Rick was shocked to hear the understanding in his voice. He hadn’t realised he felt that way, but there had been a lot of time to think during the drive to Melbourne.

  Derek seemed to sense his distress. ‘Sylvia was a wonderful mother to your daughter, Rick. Look at the photos.’ He waved his hand towards them. ‘She took Chloe overseas regularly, dressed her in lovely clothes, gave her fancy birthday parties, and sent her to the best private school she could afford. She took her to the movies, the beach and did all that girl stuff. It was when Chloe hit her teens – puberty, I guess – that the trouble started. Sylvia went to all the school forums, kept a check on Chloe’s Facebook and Instagram accounts. It didn’t save her, though, thanks to that scumbag boyfriend and Lauren.’

  ‘How did you know about Julia?’ Rick asked.

  He didn’t want to talk about Lauren Woodward. He just wanted to get all the information he could about Chloe and Sylvia, so he could take it back to Lake Grace and share it with Julia. He realised suddenly that he desperately wanted her to know that, despite everything, she had indeed done the right thing all those years ago.

  ‘I was sorting through Sylvia’s things after I’d kicked Chloe out, and I found a letter addressed to me. Inside it was the bluebird bracelet and a letter for Chloe. I didn’t know she wasn’t Sylvia’s child.’

  Rick nodded, encouraging Derek to keep talking.

  ‘I sent the bracelet and note to Chloe via Lauren’s postbox – it was the only way I had of contacting her. I just had to pray the mongrel kid would pass it on. Obviously she didn’t. She probably figured I was trying to get Chloe back on track again. Or maybe Chloe died before she could hand the letter over. Somehow I suspect the former.’

  ‘Either way, she obviously decided to open it after Chloe passed away,’ Rick said.

  ‘She probably thought it was money from Sylvia’s will. But Sylvia wasn’t stupid, Mr Halloran. She had that all tied up until Chloe turned twenty-one.’

  Which would’ve been next year. Rick felt his heart breaking into tiny little pieces.

  ‘So what was in the letter?’ he asked.

  ‘The bracelet, like I told you, and a letter from Sylvia to her daughter about her birth story. It mentioned Julia’s name and how she and Sylvia knew one another.’

  ‘So Lauren decided to take advantage of Julia by masquerading as Chloe.’

  Derek nodded. ‘Her own mother was a no-hoper, and I think Lauren was jealous of Chloe’s wonderful relationship with her mum. And most likely she was after money for drugs.’

  ‘She stole a lot of stuff from us. Took off when her caseworker managed to track her down.’

  ‘Yeah, that makes sense.’

  The two men sat in silence for a time, each lost in his own thoughts. Then Derek got up, went across to a shelf and picked up a small framed photograph. He gazed at it for a minute, before handing it to Rick.

  ‘Chloe. Before the drugs. Then, she was the most kind, caring and loving person you could hope to meet. You can keep that.’

  Rick wasn’t able to speak. He simply stared at his daughter. She was so like Julia.

  He realised that Julia really had thought giving Chloe to Sylvia was her only choice. He’d been angry at her because he’d wished things could have been different. But he couldn’t blame Julia for that. No, the blame rested firmly on his mother and Harold Gunn, that sadistic bastard.

  Rick needed to go home, to Lake Grace and the desperately hurting woman he loved.

  But he had one more stop to make first. Springvale cemetery.

  He got up. ‘Thank you, Derek. I’ve taken up enough of your day.’

  The two men shook hands, and Derek said, ‘Bring Julia with you next time. I can show you the photo albums. Sylvia was an avid photographer. It’s like watching a movie of their lives.’

  Rick nodded. He would bring Julia here. One day.

  Chapter 35

  Julia roamed around the cafe clearing up after the others had finally left. It was late in the day, and after cleaning away the empty cans, glasses and plates, she wandered to the floor-to-ceiling windows that reflected all tha
t Lake Hill had come to mean to her.

  It was some time before she saw him. He was sitting out on the bench overlooking the lake. His broad shoulders in a dark blue shirt were all she could really make out in the dusk. She imagined his grey eyes gazing across the lake towards the mountains’ rugged peaks.

  Surely he shouldn’t be sitting there all alone? Should she …?

  Deciding to risk it, she quietly slipped out the back door. Glided across the grass, barely knowing what she was going to do when she got to him. What would she say?

  In the end, she said nothing. Just sat on the bench next to him. Not too near. Not too far away. He could choose whether he wanted her close or not. She followed his gaze across the lake, towards those towering ranges that looked like they rolled on forever and ever.

  ‘She looked like you,’ he said softly. ‘Your beautiful blue eyes, your crazy hair, your face and smile. She had my chin though.’ He gave a rueful half-laugh. ‘Poor kid.’

  He reached into his pocket and pulled out a photograph. Handed it to Julia. She looked at it and found herself crying. Sobbing.

  Sylvia and Chloe stood with their arms around each other, beaming. Through her tears Julia could see that their daughter was beautiful. And Sylvia was an older version of the friend she remembered, looking so proudly at Chloe.

  Her daughter. Their daughter.

  ‘Derek said Sylvia gave her everything. Treated her like the most precious gift. Loved her even more than she could have loved a child she’d given birth to, if that’s possible.’

  Tears ran unchecked down Julia’s cheeks. Sylvia hadn’t failed her.

  ‘Derek’s a broken man,’ Rick went on. ‘Blames himself for Chloe’s death because he kicked her out. He said they’d tried rehab, good places, then Sylvia got sick and died. Things really fell apart after that. Chloe was hysterical after losing her mother. He was distraught. She went back to using, then rehab. The cycle started again. He eventually kicked her out, hoping it’d bring her to her senses. She died shortly after.’