Through Lies and Heartache

by WB Amore

  I can only nod my head because I’ve already made my choice. I don’t think anyone sees just the amount of pain she’s in from all of this. If I didn’t worry that the secrets were causing more pain I would continue to keep them where they are, where we all are. “I’m going to head up make sure she’s ok and we need to get to work. Have a good day Ms. Capello.” I turn to leave and head up the stairs without another word.

  I hear the front door close as I open Gracie’s, I find her at her desk head in her hands this kills me because I’m not so sure that her mom is really going to work. If she is she’s most likely going to have a special visitor for the afternoon. “Cheer up Picollina. We have work to do. Before Liam gets here.” I all but sneer his name which earns me a little giggle. Shaking her head she gets up telling me she’s going to go and get us some munchies and soda so that we can get to work.

  While she’s down stairs I place the note on her desk and start spreading our project stuff on top of it. Jumping into our work and before I know it it’s almost one. Liam will be here at one thirty so I start getting my things together, we head down to the kitchen

  “Well were almost done which is nice because I really need to get more training in.” she just shakes her head and smiles while handing me a water.

  “Really Ry? How much harder could you train? You train every day, you run every day, and you’re probably up to what seven miles in the hills. I know you’re keeping up with me so please do tell. What else could you need to work on?” This is what she hates. I work hard and no play. Well not the play she knows about.

  “Well I need to start bulking up lifting more.” Letting out a snort shaking her head. “What? I do.” Now she’s laughing nice from the heart laughter. I’m glad to see her laugh like this just not at my expense. When her doorbell rings I scowl at her, he’s early she giggles the whole way to the door. I fling the door open and come face to face with Liam. “Well hello Liam.” I sneer at him turning to Gracie I kiss her forehead and head out.

  Chapter Eighteen

  Liam

  When I pull in I see Ryan’s car letting out a sigh, I throw it in park and get out. I know he’s going to be a pain but we have to get this done, its due Friday. Knocking on the door I can hear Gracie laughing it gets louder as she gets closer. When the door fly’s open, its Ryan. Shaking my head at the way he sneers my name and just let it go, I won’t fight with him in front of her, there’s no telling what might get said in anger. When he brushes past me he tells me to keep my damn hands to myself chuckling I head in,

  “You want a soda or water before we get to work?”

  “A water would be nice, thanks.”

  “Head on up to my room and I’ll be up in a few with a few snacks and some water.”

  I just smile and head up when I see her desk still has other work on it. I close up the book and move it so I can lay ours down, when I pick up some papers to move them one falls to the floor. Picking it up, I see Gracie’s name scrawled onto it. I’m pretty sure its Ryan’s hand writing slowly opening it, I start to read it the more I read the more I start to panic this is bad, this is very bad. I can’t tell anyone because somehow that would make it worse. Why the fuck did he leave this here? Would he really leave it for her to find out this way? Well I guess I would leave it and then leave also, this is going to be bad. Shoving the letter into my pocket, there is no way I want her to read this while I’m here. Fuck that. Throwing our books out and I start working on our paper. When she comes back we snack and talk about our project. A few hours later were finally done with everything and it’s ready to turn in.

  “Want to hand it in tomorrow instead of Friday?” I ask her

  “Yeah because then there’s no more worry about it.” I chuckle she’s right. It would be nice not have to worry about it.

  “Alright I’m going to head out I have some other homework to do.” She walks me to the door. Hugging her she gives little sigh she holds on, pulling back I head to my car. I can’t help but feel the letter burning my thigh. What the hell am I going to do with this?

  Chapter Nineteen

  Gracie

  Before I know it the next three weeks have passed and its time for Thanksgiving, they decided to give us the whole week of this year. Which I’ll spend a good part of it alone mom has to work. She hasn’t always had to work this hard. I wonder if dad stopped sending money, maybe I’ll ask him when I spend Christmas with him. Saturday and Sunday mom and I get to spend some time together, so we plan to do movies and take out. We talk about all my school work and planning Thanksgiving dinner. I get a call Monday morning, when I finally find my phone I see its Aurora “What?” I grumble I had a hard time sleeping last night. “Well isn’t someone grouchy today?”

  “Rori what do you want because if you called to wake me up then you succeeded but I’m going back to bed.”

  “Well I was going to see what your plans are but now I don’t care. You no longer have them, I think you need some spa time. Maybe Mani’s and Pedi’s, I’m thinking you need a message work your stress out.”

  I grunt “It’s far too early to plan this. Call me this afternoon.”

  I hear her laugh “Gracie it’s 11:30. Get up I’m getting ready and then I’ll be over.”

  Heaving a sigh as I sit up “Fine bring me a Dirty Chi Tea with two shots.”

  “Sounds good be there in twenty.”

  Throwing my phone onto my bed and getting up to get ready. Seeing Rori pull in I head out the door mom has to work this week just until Wednesday.

  “Hey sweets I think mom took Friday off, so she’ll get a four day weekend, maybe we can do Black Friday shopping. Want to come with?”

  “Sounds great. I’ll come over about seven on Thursday, after every one leaves.”

  “Sweet want to do movies and goodies like we used to?”

  “With the fort?”

  “No. I think that’s something we should keep for the four of us.”

  “Ok. Don’t get sad now, this is a girl’s day lets go shopping to.”

  “Sounds good.”

  After our spa we decide to get some lunch. Then hit the mall. It’s seven when she pulls into my driveway,

  “You gonna stay the night or you headin home?”

  “Do I get to pick the movie?”

  “Yeah you can pick the movie”

  Heading up stairs to put my bags in my room I only bought a new pair of sweats, a hoodie and a few books. When I get back down stairs she has started the popcorn so I grab the M & M’s and a bowl when the popcorn is done I sprinkle it with the M & M’s. Picking up the bowl opening the fridge I grab two waters while Rori grabs two spoons and two tubs of Gelato out of the freezer. When I see she’s picked Pitch Perfect I let out a giggle. The next thing I know someone is shaking me waking up I see mom standing over me with a smile on her face, looking at what mess we’ve left we both feel asleep on the couch looking over I see Rori sprawled out at the other end of the couch still sleeping.

  “Come on I’ll help you clean up then we can head to bed it’s just after ten.”

  “Where have you been mama? Why are you working so late?”

  “Well I’ve been with a client we’re getting ready for trial.”

  Cleaning the mess up and throwing a blanket over Rori I follow mom up stairs and head to bed.

  Waking up to the sun in my face groaning I must have forgot to close my curtains. When I roll over I notice Rori lying next to me.

  “I came up here when your mom left for work. Why do I feel hung over today? The hardest thing we had last night was the Lacy Florentines we found hidden in the pantry.”

  “Ha, I think it was the Gelato, Popcorn M & M mix, oh and don’t think I didn’t see you sneak the Hazelnut cookies.” I giggle.

  “Well I couldn’t help it your mom makes the best cookies ever. I have to head home soon mom wants to spend time together today.”

  “Well let’s go get some breakfast before you head home.”

  Getting up I h
ead to my closet and hand her the cloths she leaves here and I change, while I’m brushing my teeth I realize I’m wearing the sweats and sweater from Ryan’s, with a sigh I leave while Rori’s brushing her teeth and all that I head down stairs to finish cleaning up. When she comes down we grab our purses and head out.

  I spend the rest of the day doing laundry and reading. Mom called to tell me she would pick up dinner on her way home. She should be home soon so I head down to the kitchen and clean up a little pulling out plates I set the table, mom’s walking in the door as I’m grabbing me some water. Sitting down we have a nice little dinner talking about Rori and I’s shopping trip and the spa. Heading into the living room we sit down and watch a TV.

  Wednesday I head to the store to get the rest of the things we need for our dinner tomorrow. I decide that I want to make the pie and cookies since Rori and I killed the ones that were in there. While I’m cooking I realize I haven’t run all week and it feels kind of nice but I kind of want to go maybe I’ll head up to the hills.

  ~*~

  We’re back to school tomorrow. We only have three weeks then we get two weeks off for Christmas and New Year’s. Dad called and wants me to go stay with him for the full two weeks not just Christmas like I planned but I told him I wanted to see how things go before I commit for the whole two weeks. It’s not like we spend all that much time together, but whatever mom has to work the whole time except for Christmas day and New Year’s Day. Mom wants me to spend time with dad, we don’t get as much as we’d like.

  Before I know it the next three weeks have passed and its time for me to pack up some things to go see dear old dad. Going threw everything into a duffle bag when I get a text looking over at my phone I see it flashing wondering if its dad telling me that he has to work and not to bother. Going over picking it up and see it’s Ryan,

  Ryan – You ready?

  Me – Um…

  Ryan – We’re riding together, didn’t you know?

  Me – WTF do you mean?

  Ryan – Yeah. I have some things to do in Boston. Your dad didn’t want you alone.

  Me – It’s an HOUR. I think I’ll be fine.

  Ryan – Yeah not gonna happen. Be ready in 10.

  ~*~

  When Ry pulls up I’m throwing my bag in the back seat of my car,

  “What the hell Gracie?”

  “What I told you that I was driving myself. It’s an hour drive, I’ll be fine.”

  I say as he walks up to me opening the door grabbing my bag,

  “What the hell Ryan. Put it back!”

  “No you don’t get it, I will be driving you to your dads.”

  “Why in the world can I not drive myself?”

  “Your dad asked me to drive. Now get in my car.”

  “Gah! Fine.”

  Getting in the car and slamming the door.

  “Please don’t take your anger out on my car.”

  “How about you shut up and drive. You forced me in here deal with it.”

  “Damn it.”

  Turning my head and looking out the window,

  “Why am I riding with you? Besides the fact that my dad said I was to ride with you.”

  “I have a meeting in Boston and I’ll be spending some time with my dad while I’m there. Your dad asked if I would drive you up here since I was coming this way.”

  “Do you ever tell my dad no?”

  “Do you want to go to a hotel or to your dads when we get there?”

  “Smooth, real smooth. Hotel”

  I am so pissed off I don’t want to see my dad yet and I plan to make this a miserable trip, maybe next time he’ll say no. Not likely but I can hope.

  Ten minutes late I finally look at Ryan, “I have to pee.”

  “Can you hold it? We just got on the freeway.”

  “Nope, I gotta go now.”

  Heaving a sigh he changes lanes and gets off the freeway, pulling into the gas station I get out and go to the bathroom, I may as well go while were here. Washing my hands I head out to the car.

  “You good? Want to get anything to eat while we’re here, there are a couple places close by.”

  “No I think I’m good.” I smile at him “Thanks for stopping.” Getting back on the road I mess with the radio which earns me some dirty looks, when I find nothing but commercials I plug my phone in turning on a random play list the first song that plays is Barbie Girl I can’t help but laugh even better! After a while I get bored when I look at the clock I see it’s been twenty minutes sense my potty break and I decide I’m hungry. Turning to look at him, when he glances over at me he just shakes his head no.

  “You don’t even know what I want, why are you telling me no?”

  “You want to stop.”

  “Well I’m hungry. If I drove myself you wouldn’t have to worry about it, now would you?”

  “Really? If you drove yourself you wouldn’t be stopping, now would you?”

  Just then my stomach growls loudly, cocking my head and lifting my brow at him.

  We’re getting ready to leave the small diner “You need to go to the bathroom?”

  I can’t help but laugh “No I’m good”

  “Piccolina, please go to the bathroom before we leave.”

  “Fine I’ll go.” Shaking my head I get up and go to the bathroom.

  Back in the car and on the road… Looking out the window I feel drowsy leaning my head back I drift to sleep. Waking to my hair being messed with, turning to look I notice I’m lying down so I look up to see Ryan looking down with a small smile.

  “You fell asleep and sort of fell over, so I laid you down.”

  “Thanks.” I say as I sit up rubbing my eyes. “What time is it?”

  “Just after one, come on let’s get a room.”

  Chapter Twenty

  Ryan

  I couldn’t help but run my fingers through her hair as she slept. I can’t stop replaying Halloween night. I can’t stop thinking about her hands on my skin. Shaking my head I can’t think about that now. After checking in I grab our bags in one hand and Gracie’s hand in my other hand and pull her behind me to the elevator. Neither one of say anything, looking over at her she looks sleepy. I don’t how I’m going to tell her about Halloween night, the fact that she’s even looking at me makes me wonder if she even read the letter I left her. When we get to the room I see that there is only one bed, I can’t stop my bodies reaction to the thought of sleeping in the same bed as her.

  “I’m going to lay down and take a nap.”

  “Ok, I’m going to go for a swim while you do.”

  I look over at her she’s nods her head. Grabbing my shorts out of my bag I head to the bathroom to change, when I come out she’s already asleep. Heading down the pool so that maybe I can work some of this frustration out of my system before I have to sleep in the same bed as her. About an hour later I finally feel relaxed so I head back up to the room. When I get the bed is empty I feel my heart rate pick up did she tell me she was going to sleep so that she could leave when I left, did something happen to her? Oh god I hope she didn’t leave her dad will kill me if anything happens to her. Just as I reach my phone the bathroom door opens and there stands Gracie in nothing but a towel. Taking three long strides to get to her I gently grab her face in my hands looking in her eyes she looks extremely confused taking a deep breath and slowly letting in out, “I’m sorry. When I got back you weren’t in here and there was no sign of you. I didn’t know if you left or something happened to you.”

  “Why would anything happen to me?”

  Letting out another sigh I can’t stand to be this close to her and not touch her just touching her makes me think of Halloween again, slowly leaning in I touch my lips to hers.

  Gracie

  When Ryan’s lips touch mine I can’t help but lean into him, that’s when my dream floods my vision. Grabbing onto his arms for more support I slowly pull back I can’t help it. Eyes full of wonder and confusion “I keep having the same dre
am over and over I’m not sleeping much from it.”

  “What dream is that Piccolina?”

  “I keep dreaming that you and I have been together. It started Halloween night.”

  Hanging his head he pulls away, sitting on the bed with his head in his hands.

  “I had the same dream but I’ve been having mine for far longer than that. It’s why I didn’t think too much of it.”“What are you talking about Ry? It was just a dream.”

  Looking up at me with so much guilt in his eyes.

  “It was a dream right Ry?”

  Shaking his head “No Piccolina it wasn’t a dream. You have to know I’ve been having these dreams of us being together for months. I honestly thought it was a dream like any other night. Until I got home from your house, when I made my bed I found a small spot of blood on my sheets. That’s when I knew it wasn’t a dream and I didn’t know how to tell you. I’m sorry, I really am.”

  “You mean it wasn’t a dream? We… You… You’ve touched me and I don’t remember it?” I say looking at my feet. I can’t believe I just said that out loud. Feeling his hand on my face causes me to look up at him.

  “Ry, I want that again.”

  “I can’t, it never should have happened in the first time. You know we can’t be together.”

  “I want to be able to feel everything and remember it like it was yesterday. I know that you don’t do the girlfriend thing, I’m not asking for that. All I’m asking for is one night. Nothing more.” Even saying the words my heart is breaking, I have been in love with Ryan most of my life, I just didn’t know how deep until the dreams started. I’ll let him go with or without this night but I can’t help wanting this night.

  “Piccolina we shouldn’t do this.”