A Chance to Love Again

by Hutton, Callie

  “I love you.”

  All the breath left her body in one huge exhale. How could this man think he loved her and then accuse her of lying and cheating? The words he’d hurled at her still had the ability to cut through her like a well-honed knife.

  “No. You don’t love me. If you love someone, trust is there. It’s part of the package. Love, trust, caring, friendship, sharing, they all come in one package.” She pointed her finger at him. “And you, Mr. McIntyre, are missing a big part of love.”

  “I can learn.”

  “I don’t want to be someone’s experiment.”

  “Mr. McIntyre, are we ready to go?” Will came bouncing into the room, all smiles and little-boy excitement.

  “Yeah, son. We’re ready to go.” Rusty rested his hand on Will’s shoulder and headed to the door. Before he stepped onto the porch, he said, “This isn’t finished. I have a lot more to say to you.”

  As soon as he was out of sight, Rachel’s shaky knees forced her to sit. Having him close, holding her, looking at her with those green eyes begging for forgiveness had wrought havoc with her body. This would never do. She couldn’t spend the rest of her life avoiding Rusty, especially with the bond Will had formed with him.

  Amelia and Rusty were getting along better, and it was time for him to take over his parental duties. An idea that began to form in her mind after the hotel incident jumped to the forefront.

  She quickly washed her hands and face and re-braided her hair. Switching out a clean apron for the one that held the evidence of breakfast cooked for hungry cowboys, she headed to the door. This was a risky step, but she could no longer leave things the way they were.

  The housekeeper opened the door of Big Bob’s ranch house. “Good morning, Mrs. Stevens. How are you and your boy?”

  “We’re just fine, Mrs. Plumb. Is Mr. Richardson in?”

  “He sure is, ma’am. Just follow me to the parlor and I’ll fetch him for you.”

  After a wait of only about five minutes, the room was filled with Big Bob’s presence. The scent of tobacco and horses wafted from him. He greeted her with a huge smile and waved to one of the chairs so they could sit.

  “What brings you here on this fine morning?”

  Rachel took a deep breath. This was going to be hard, but it had to be done. For her sake as well as Will’s.

  “I have come to give notice that I am leaving your employ. In two weeks.”

  Big Bob leaned back in his chair, one booted foot crossed over his knee. “Are there problems I’m not aware of? Do you need more money?”

  She shook her head. “I just think it would be better to live in town now that Will is getting older. It’s closer to school so he won’t miss any days when bad weather hits.”

  His familiar smile didn’t fool her one bit. He most likely knew there was more to her story, but perhaps he wouldn’t question her further.

  “Well, actually little lady, you’ve come to the wrong person.”

  “Excuse me?”

  “Rusty McIntyre and I have worked out a deal. He is buying the ranch and Mrs. Richardson and I are headed to our new home in Arizona Territory. The doctor says it will be better for her arthritis. So, in about three days, when we pack up and leave, Mr. McIntyre is your boss.”

  Chapter Eleven

  Rachel tried very hard to keep her ladylike composure. So, Rusty worked out a deal with Big Bob? How nice for him. Most likely his lack of trust in her was the reason he’d never mentioned it.

  She swallowed several times. “Well, that is certainly a surprise.”

  “Actually since you and Rusty are so . . . close, I’m surprised you didn’t already know.”

  Oh, Lord. What did Big Bob know of their relationship? She felt her face flame, wondering how much of their closeness the man was privy to. And what of the other cowboys? Did Rusty make it a point to regale the men with tales of their closeness?

  And furthermore, why didn’t she know? The questions bombarding her came to a screeching halt when she jumped up as if booted from behind. “Well, in that case, I guess I need to speak with Mr. McIntyre.”

  Big Bob jerked. “Now hold on there. I know he’ll have a heck of a time finding a decent cook. You sure you want to do this?”

  “Yes. I’m sure. I have to do what’s best for my son.”

  “Well, in that case, I wish you the best. Where will you be working?”

  “The Café is looking for a cook. I’ll send a note when Duncan goes into town for the mail. And I will stop in to see Mrs. Richardson before you leave.” She hesitated a moment, and then added, “I will miss you.”

  “I’ll miss you, too. Now come over here and give me a hug.”

  She stepped into Big Bob’s embrace and hugged him back. She was so grateful to him for giving her a job after Billy died. Without this job she would have been at the mercy of her family. But now it was time to move on. Especially in light of Rusty being her new boss.

  Slowly she came down the steps of the ranch house and headed to the chuck wagon. Since the last of the haying was scheduled for today, the men were staying out in the fields, so she and Mac were taking their noon meal to them.

  The late summer air was still quite warm, the screech of locusts deafening. Her decision to leave was for the best. It would have been bad enough dealing with Rusty every day as the foreman, but as her boss—well, that wouldn’t work out at all.

  “Rachel, Mac said we don’t have enough chili peppers for the stew. Do you have some at home?” Amelia hurried up to her, her face flushed from cooking.

  “Yes, in fact I do. Why don’t you go fetch them from my back pantry, and I’ll help Mac.” Before she could walk off, Rachel reached out and touched the girl on her shoulder. “I need to talk to you after we get back from feeding the cowboys.”

  “All right.” Leaving her with a curious glance, Amelia headed toward the house.

  The meal preparation went quickly with her, Mac, and Amelia chopping, stirring, and then loading the stew and fresh baked bread onto the chuck wagon. She added the finishing touches on four pecan pies while Amelia filled the water barrel from the well.

  Once Mac had the horses hitched to the wagon, the three of them started off for the fields. Even though it was early September, the Oklahoma sun was bright and strong. Rachel fanned herself with the bottom of her apron, the sweat on her head already soaking her bonnet.

  As the wagon rattled over a hill, the sight of the rolling plains, the last of the alfalfa waving in the breeze waiting for cutting, reminded her why she loved the ranch so much. The satisfaction of watching the year round cycle of the operation, the birth of calves, shipping cattle, growing and cutting of hay, all gave her a sense of peace, of life continuing. She would really miss it when she moved into town.

  But it was a necessary move. She had to get as far from Rusty McIntyre as she could for her heart’s wellbeing. Although, truth be known, Will would have a difficult time with it. She hated breaking her son’s heart, but it wasn’t good for him to get too attached, anyway. She wanted him to go to college, make something of himself, not end up a broken down cowboy.

  Broken down cowboys don’t buy ranches the size of the Lazy Sunset.

  Mac pulled hard on the reins and the horses came to a stop. They all jumped down and began to set up for the noon meal. When everything was ready, she rang the supper bell.

  From all different directions, the men swamped the area, forming a crooked line. She dished out the stew and Amelia placed bread on each man’s plate. Rusty and Will were the last ones in line.

  “How was your morning, honey?” Rachel asked as she handed Will his meal.

  “Ma, it was great! Me and Rusty bossed everyone else around.”

  Rusty spit out the swallow of water he’d just taken in. He wiped his mouth with his hand and eyed Will. “We didn’t boss everyone else around.”

  “Well, you did. I really just watched,” Will mumbled.

  Grinning, Rusty took his plate from Rachel an
d waited while Amelia put the bread on his dish, giving him a genuine smile. It appeared Amelia was one less problem she had to deal with in leaving. Rusty and his daughter were ready to share his house and their lives.

  ***

  Later that evening, Rusty pounded on Rachel’s door, anger twisting his guts and heating his face. “Rachel, open this door!”

  The door flew open so fast, he almost smacked her in the face.

  “What is going on? Why are you pounding on my door, and why are you shouting?” With jerky movements, she dried her hands on a towel, then slung it over her shoulder, her lips firm.

  Rusty grabbed Rachel’s hand and tugged. “Come with me.”

  She tugged back. “I will not.”

  He fisted his hands on his hips and glared at her. “You will come with me unless you want the entire ranch to hear our personal business.”

  “We have no personal business, Mr. McIntyre.”

  “Fine.” Giving her a tight smile, he crossed his arms over his chest and leaned against the doorway. “Then we’ll have this conversation right here.”

  “Ma? What’s the matter?” Will wandered to the front door, a frown on his face.

  “Well?” Rusty smirked.

  “Nothing is the matter, sweetie.” Rachel scowled at Rusty. “All right. Just let me turn off the water. I was washing dishes. I don’t see what you’re all so fired up about.” She returned to the kitchen while Rusty waited on the front porch.

  When Big Bob told him he needed to find another cook because Rachel was moving into town, it took all of his control not to snap at the man and punch his fist into the wall. It was bad enough that she wouldn’t give him the time of day, but to leave her job—and him—without settling their differences was not something he intended to ignore.

  “Mr. McIntyre. Is something wrong?” Will looked up to him with wide eyes as he wiped his mouth on his sleeve.

  “No, son. I just need to talk to your ma a bit.”

  Rachel appeared at the door, minus her apron and towel. She ruffled Will’s hair, then bent to give him a kiss on his cheek. “Go on back inside, and finish your schoolwork. I won’t be long.” She dared Rusty with her eyes to dispute her statement.

  They walked in silence around the back of the house and to the fields the men had left just a couple of hours ago. The smell of newly cut hay was still in the air, reminding him once again why he loved ranch life. And to think with a few years of hard work, this would be his.

  He’d already given Big Bob the bulk of his savings as a down payment. The man’s lawyer had drawn up the agreement, outlining the amount of each quarterly payment, and the number of years to pay it off. Comfortable with the terms, Rusty had cheerfully signed and handed Big Bob the bank draft.

  He still couldn’t believe his luck in having Big Bob decide to sell the place. Now if he could only get this mess with Rachel straightened out, his life would be exactly where he wanted it. For years he didn’t want to get tied up with another woman. But Rachel changed all that.

  Their one time together had convinced him she was right for him, and they could have a good life together. And, as hard as it had been to allow himself to admit it, he loved her. Something he probably hadn’t picked the best time to blurt out to her, however.

  He cast her a sideways glance. If the look on her face was any indication of how this conversation would go, they wouldn’t be standing in front of a preacher any time soon. She stared straight ahead, her body rigid. Despite her obvious annoyance with what she probably labeled his high-handedness, she still had the ability to raise his temperature and send all his blood to one place.

  A slight breeze lifted the curls on her neck that had escaped her bun. Her cheeks, flushed from the walk and her anger, reminded him of how she looked in the throes of passion. Hopefully he would get to see her that way again. He mentally undressed her, remembering the curves, softness, and warmth of her body. His hands itched to cup her breasts and kiss her tight nipples.

  If he didn’t get himself under control, he would incur her wrath even more by throwing her down on the ground and having his way with her.

  “I think we’ve walked far enough.” Best to get the conversation started while he still had most of his faculties.

  Rachel stopped so abruptly he walked past her a few steps before he realized she’d halted. “So, tell me what it was that had you banging on my door like the sheriff.”

  He took her hand in his, and while she didn’t pull it away, she looked over his shoulder, her attention riveted on something behind him. He cupped her chin with his other hand and turned her head toward him. “Rachel, why did you tell Big Bob that you were leaving this job and moving into town?”

  “Had I known your question was going to be so easy, I could have answered it at the front door. I told Big Bob I was leaving my job here and moving into town because I am leaving my job here and moving into town.” She raised her eyebrows. “Can I go home now?”

  He couldn’t help himself. He shifted his body and wrapped his hand around her neck, tugging her closer. His head descended and he covered her lips with his. In an instant he knew he’d come home. Her mouth was sweet, warm, and soft. He could lose himself in her sweetness and never look to escape. She was his, and the need to put his stamp on her, to let the world know without a doubt to whom she belonged, burned like a fire in his belly.

  Whatever it took, he would convince Rachel to marry him. And that he needed to accomplish it before her brother arrived with a shotgun aimed at his back.

  She stiffened and wiggled her two hands between them, shoving against his chest. “No. Stop.”

  He released her lips and kissed the soft skin under her ear, down to her neck and along her jawline. His palms slid up and down her arms, and he grasped her shoulders. “Oh, darlin’, you are so sweet. I can’t get enough of you.”

  She gave him one strong shove. “I said, stop it!”

  Rusty rested his hands on his hips and hung his head, his eyes closed. He wouldn’t get anywhere with her if he didn’t stop. “I’m sorry, sweetheart. I promise to behave myself.” He looked up fast enough to see the hunger in her own eyes before she quickly shifted her glance.

  “I don’t see the point of this. I have no intention of allowing a man to court me who doesn’t trust me.” She shook her head and wrapped her arms around herself. “I won’t do it.”

  He was losing her fast. The change in her as she withdrew told him he wouldn’t get anywhere trying to push. But he needed time. Time she wouldn’t give him. But perhaps he had to let her go to win her back. It sounded stupid to him, but at this point she wasn’t giving him a choice. “When are you moving to town?”

  The surprise showed on her face. Maybe letting her go was the best way to win her back.

  “As soon as the new cook can be hired. Since you’re the boss—not that you saw fit to tell me—you’ll have to let me know when I can leave.”

  He reached out and tucked a curl behind her ear. “If I had my way, darlin’—never.”

  She narrowed her eyes, the sudden change causing him to bite the inside of his cheek to keep from laughing. God, how he loved her moods. From spitfire to sedate, from playful to somber.

  Tamping down his amusement, he said, “Never mind. I’ll walk you back.”

  Despite their disagreement, she allowed him to tuck her arm into his as they strolled back. The moon had climbed over the tops of the trees while they’d been out. Rachel in the moonlight was a vision of loveliness. Even with her stained work dress and disheveled hair.

  As they reached her front door, he turned her to him and wrapped his arms around her waist. “What about Amelia?”

  “I think she is better off here with you. She can continue to work with Mac and the new cook. She enjoys that. And you’re her father. She needs you, even though she doesn’t think so.”

  “And Will?”

  “I haven’t told him yet.” She stared off in the distance, the pain of a parent denying her chil
d something he wanted evident on her face. “He will be upset. But I don’t want him to have this life. I want him to go to college.”

  Rusty sighed and released her. “You’re his mother, but honey, you’re going to have a problem with that boy. He loves the ranch, loves the life. I know he’s young, but I can see it’s in his blood.”

  She tightened her lips. “Yes. I’m his mother, and I want what’s best for him.”

  “For him? Or for you? I get the feeling you think he can make up for something you missed out on and now regret.”

  “It doesn’t matter. Will is my son, and my problem.” She pointed her finger at his chest. “You have your own daughter to be concerned about. Be sure she gets to school every day.”

  “Yes, ma’am.” He grinned and managed to get a slight smile out of her before she opened the door and entered the house, closing the door softly, leaving him frustrated and not sure what to do next.

  Chapter Twelve

  The bell over the pharmacy door chimed, giving notice that a customer had entered the store. Rusty caught Michael’s eye as the pharmacist spoke with an older woman at the counter. Michael nodded briefly and returned to his conversation.

  Rusty wandered the store, filled with shelves of medicine and other items for sale. Neatly arranged stacks of paper, a cup full of pencils, artfully arranged hair ribbons and jars of candy gave the store a sense of tidiness. He studied one shelf with bottles of Papine, Cannabis, nerve tonic pills, and something called Sugar Lead with the warning poison on it.

  Michael wished his customer a good day and walked from behind the counter to Rusty. “What brings you here today? And when is the wedding?”

  Rusty pushed the brim of his hat back with his thumb and shrugged. “I’m sorry to say I’m getting nowhere with your very stubborn sister. Did you know she left her job at the ranch and is now cooking for the Café?”

  “Yes, I know. My sister Ellie was in the other day and she told me Rachel is staying at Mrs. Beamer’s boardinghouse where Ellie has her room.” Michael tightened his lips and shook his head. “Rachel’s been the cook for Big Bob since Billy died years ago.”