Cocktails & Dreams

by Autumn Markus

  “‘Fucking sexy’?” Nicholas’s breathy chuckle across her skin made her shiver. He smoothed his hand slowly up her thigh and nibbled at the satiny skin of her breast. “I think I like that, Jena.”

  “Mmmm…Nicholas…oh, fuck me…” Jena sighed, running her hand through his hair and down to clutch at his shoulder.

  “Gladly,” he said, wrapping one arm around her waist and cradling her head with his weak arm. When her lips parted to allow him access, Nick’s mind quit working altogether. Instinct led him to ease his body over hers and to settle between her legs. Jena tightened her hand in Nicholas’s hair and wrapped one leg around his hip, pulling him close. Her other arm slid around his back, and he felt something poking him between the shoulder blades.

  Damn, that was distracting.

  “Jena? Sweetheart?”

  “Mmm-hmm?” she hummed, sliding tiny kisses along his jaw and down his neck.

  “What are you stabbing me with?”

  Jena stopped moving, and dropped her head to the pillow. “What?” She moved her arm to show him the book she was still holding. “I guess I got a little carried away and forgot.”

  Chuckling, Nick drew his head back to look at it. Pratchett. Nice choice. He shook his head at himself; he had Jena mostly undressed in his bed and he was critiquing her choice of reading material.

  Taking the book from her hand, Nicholas tossed it toward the chair. “I’d never take you for a Discworld fan,” he joked, leaning in to her again. The suddenly serious look on her face stopped him cold as Jena withdrew her leg and placed her hands on his chest, frowning.

  “That’s the problem, isn’t it? You barely know me. And I barely know you.” She was suddenly chewing on her lower lip and looking anywhere but at him. He eased himself to his side and rested his head on his hand, knowing that he couldn’t argue with her, as much as he would have liked to.

  Jena shifted herself until she was half sitting against the headboard. She started buttoning the shirt she wore with shaky fingers. “I have to say something, Nicholas, so just…listen. This—” she gestured between herself and Nick. “I don’t do this, and especially not with someone I don’t know.” Her flush was deepening to red, and her lips were starting to quiver.

  Nicholas took her hand. “I know that, Jena. I don’t do this either.” He kissed the palm of her hand and curled it within his own. “And you know me.”

  Jena laced her fingers with his. “Yes, I do,” she whispered, glancing up with a fleeting smile and then training her eyes on their entwined fingers. “Nicholas, I had a bit to drink last night, but I don’t play the ‘I was so drunk I didn’t know what I was doing’ card. Well, unless it’s true.” She smiled again, eyes still trained on their hands. “I wanted to be with you. I was aware of what I was doing. Hell, I still want you.” Nick’s heart did a funny bump. Jena seemed to force herself to look at his face. “I just want to know you better, okay? So I can wake up and feel good about myself.”

  Like he could resist her, looking all sweet and sad and embarrassed.

  “Understood.” He sat up and leaned against the headboard, putting his arm around her shoulders and relaxing as she snuggled against him.

  A quiet knock broke the silence and then Travis’s voice came through the door.

  “Jen? I hate to do this, but we have to be at work in a few minutes.”

  Jena’s eyes darted the clock on the nightstand. “Holy shit!” Tender moment decidedly over, she jumped out of bed and started looking for her clothes. Nicholas enjoyed the helpless look on her face as she realized only her bra and shoes were wearable. He worked to stifle a chuckle as Jena surveyed the wreck of her shorts with a disgusted look on her face.

  Of course, she caught him and flared out. “Oh, you think this is funny? You try wearing crotch-crispy shorts with no underwear and a come-stained shirt sometime!” Nick burst out laughing as Jena studied her shirt. “I’ll never be able to wear this again,” she mourned, shaking her head. “You people carry bleach around in your nuts, I swear.”

  Her eyes widened as her mind caught up with her mouth, and she clapped her hand over her lips before flopping in the chair, a despondent look on her face.

  Still snickering, Nick pulled on his shorts from the day before and dug around in his dresser until he found a pair of athletic shorts with a drawstring and an old, too-small rowing T-shirt from UO. He dropped them in her lap, trying not to see what the half-buttoned shirt exposed. “There. That should get you home. And would it sound sick if I said that was a pretty hot thing to say?”

  “What? ‘Bleach in your nuts’?”

  Nick laughed. “No, ‘crispy-crotch shorts and a come-stained shirt.’”

  Jena dropped her head in her hands. Gently pulling her to her feet, Nicholas pried her hands down from her face. “It’s hot because that came from you and me, Jena. Maybe we did rush things a little, but I’m not sorry. I’ve wanted you from the first day that I saw you at four thirty in the morning, wearing old sweats and waiting for a bus.”

  She stared at him for a minute, mouth working as she apparently tried and discarded various responses. “I’m not sorry, either,” she finally said.

  Nicholas pulled her into his arms. “I can wait, Jena. I want to get to know you, too.” He couldn’t resist running his hands down her back to cup her behind. “Your mind, anyway. I don’t know if it’s possible to get to know your body any better than I already did in San Francisco.”

  Jena pulled back and smiled with wide-eyed innocence. “What happened in San Fran?”

  Just then, Travis poked his head in the door and groaned. “You’re killing me, Jena! We have to go now or we’ll never be on time. Hi, Nick.”

  Nick waved and quickly stepped in front of Jena as she pulled his shorts up over her hips and started to yank the shirt he’d handed her over her head.

  Travis snickered. “Please. If you’d spent as many Shitty Day Ritual nights with Jena as I have…Really, I’ve seen it all and sent home the postcard.”

  Feeling a twinge of jealousy, Nicholas mentally smacked himself on the head. His mind reasoned that although they’d had a good time and he was incredibly attracted to this girl, he had no claim on her and no right to feel any way in particular about who saw her body. His gut wasn’t buying that, though, and tightened as he thought about everything Travis might have seen.

  Jena brushed by Nick with a smile, running her hand up his back as she headed out the door and toward the bathroom, carrying her bra.

  “Hey, Nick, would it be too much of an imposition if I asked you to drive Leisa home?” Travis asked, staring at his watch impatiently; he glanced up at Nicholas quickly and frowned. “Scratch that. I’ll ask Conor. I totally forgot about your arm.” He looked disapprovingly at Nick’s sling-free appendage. “Looks like you did, too.” Travis glanced around the room until he spotted the sling on the floor. “Let’s get this back on you. How does the arm feel?” Travis moved swiftly, adjusting the straps with the economical motions of someone who has done an action a thousand times.

  “Fine, actually. I forgot all about it.”

  “And the sling was off because…?” Travis was still making minute adjustments, but he looked up to scowl at Nick.

  Nicholas just raised an eyebrow.

  Travis chuckled and shook his head. “Forget I asked. Definitely not my business. Just be careful.” He looked serious, and Nick had a feeling he wasn’t talking about the arm anymore.

  Nick nodded, grabbing a shirt from the closet and tossing it on. Jena called Travis from the living room, and the guys walked out to find her fully dressed and giggling at Leisa. She was sprawled on the couch, moaning, with a wet washcloth over her eyes.

  “This isn’t funny, bitch,” Leisa whispered. “My head is exploding, I swear. Don’t ever let me drink Jäger again. Ever, ever, ever…” Her voice trailed off in to a moan.

  “Nice hair, Leisa.” Conor strolled into the room wearing only jeans, scratching his chest. “I’m lovin’ the an
gry porcupine look.”

  Leisa uncovered one eye and gave him the finger. “Shut up, you damned dirty ape. And put a shirt on, for God’s sake. No one wants to see your teeny chest pubes.”

  “Speak for yourself,” Conor said, strutting toward the kitchen and returning with a cup in his hand. “Did you tell the horndogs your news?”

  Jena choked on the coffee she was sipping. The flash of vulnerability in her eyes made Nicholas want to protect her from Conor’s teasing. “What’s the big news, Jäger Queen?” He took Jena’s cup from her hand, sipping the coffee as he rubbed her back reassuringly.

  Leisa struggled to sit up, a little vibrancy returning to her face at having something good to tell. “Lease is signed, furniture purchased, and in two weeks there will be a huge housewarming party at Chez Parker.” She moaned and flopped back down on the couch. “It sounded like a bigger deal last night after a few shots.”

  Travis glared at his watch again and pulled Jena toward the door after dropping a quick kiss on Leisa’s head. “It’s great to have all this bonding time and everything, but Jena and I are officially now late as fuck. Leisa, call me when you’re fully revived, sugar.”

  Jena smiled and waved at Nick as the door crashed closed.

  Leisa patted the cushion next to her as she struggled to sit up again and commanded, “Sit, Cooper.”

  Nicholas complied as Conor rolled his eyes and headed for the hallway, where Samantha was presumably waiting.

  “So. What’s going on? Spill it, mister.” Leisa had brightened slightly as Nick sat down.

  “Well, Leisa, since we know each other so well, I’ll have to tell you it’s none of your damned business.” He grinned at her.

  “I feel compelled to tell you that this is not something common for Jena.” Leisa’s eyes were very serious, despite her bright smile.

  Nicholas nodded, his own smile fading. “So I’ve heard.”

  “Great. So I won’t get into that except to say that I can and will make your life a living hell if you cock this up. Even if you are going to be a friend, Jena was there first. Consider yourself duly warned.” Leisa patted Nicholas on the head and straggled down the hall toward the bathroom, muttering about a shower. Nick heard a shriek as a door slammed closed. “Jesus God, the bathroom? That is so nasty, you guys.” Another door closed with a bang.

  By the time Conor got back from driving the girls home, Nick had cleaned the apartment, aside from the bathroom. Conor laughed when Nick tossed him the Comet and gestured to the open door, but he finished the job quickly and they settled down to watch a game. Well, Conor watched anyway. Nick’s mind was miles away, first in the physical therapy room at UC Davis, and then in an apartment he had yet to see.

  All day, Nick had hoped that Jena would call. He didn’t want to disturb her at work, and by the time he judged she would be heading home, Jena wasn’t answering her phone. Nick couldn’t get their last conversation out of his mind, and he wondered if she really believed that he wanted to get to know her better, too. She had looked so vulnerable when she said she wanted to be able to feel good about herself when she woke up. Did she feel bad now? Nicholas hoped not and could have kicked his own ass for not having asked her that earlier.

  “Need anything from the kitchen?” Nick rose from the couch, trying to be casual, and planning to call Jena again when he was out of the living room.

  “Sure. I’ll take a beer.” Conor stretched in the recliner. “Oh, and say hi to Jena from me.” He grinned.

  Busted.

  “I will if she answers.” Nicholas felt his face redden and quickly left the room. No answer again, damn it.

  He tossed Conor a beer and flopped on the couch.

  “No answer?” Conor asked. Nick shook his head. “I wouldn’t worry about it. She probably needs some time to adjust to whatever happened last night.” He raised his eyebrow questioningly, and Nicholas rolled his eyes. Conor smirked. “Nothin’, huh?”

  “I wouldn’t say nothing.” Nick smiled, remembering. “But we’ve decided to get to know each other better before…you know.”

  Conor snorted. “‘You know’? What, are you a fuckin’ girl now? You mean, before you have wild, animal sex? I thought that bridge was already crossed, man.”

  Nicholas shrugged.

  “You did ask her about New Year’s, didn’t you?”

  “Sort of. But I didn’t get a real answer, because Travis called her out to go to work.”

  Conor laughed. “Shit, you are a girl! ‘Sort of’? How do you ‘sort of’ ask someone if you fucked spectacularly numerous times in a five- or six- hour period? And good luck stopping now. In my opinion, you can’t put that Cheez Whiz back in the can.”

  He ducked, laughing, as Nick side armed a couch pillow at his head, and they settled in to watch TV until Conor fell asleep in his recliner and Nick wandered to his own room.

  He spent that night tossing and turning, unable to clear the memories of the way Jena felt and sounded and tasted out of his head. Finally dropping off as the sun was rising, Nick found himself tormented by dreams where Jena and the Angel were one and the same until he awoke frustrated and lonely in the early afternoon. Deciding to let things lie until Jena was ready to talk, Nick spent the day doing laundry and generally avoiding Conor, who snickered every time he was near Nicholas. Apparently, Nick had been a little loud while he’d been dreaming again.

  By Monday, when Conor dropped him off at the medical center with a promise to return in an hour, Nick felt like charging into the therapy room. Even if Jena wasn’t there, maybe Travis would have some clue about how she was and how Nick could get her to talk to him.

  Looking around quickly when he got into the therapy room, Nicholas was relieved to see Jena. She looked good, calm and confident as she instructed some guy through a series of exercises, correcting his movements with a touch or a word. She finally seemed to feel Nicholas staring and looked up, smiling hesitantly when he waved.

  Travis clapped Nick on the good shoulder as he led him to the massage table, then through his regular series of machines, shaking his head as he had to repeatedly ask for Nick’s attention. Finally, he gave up.

  “Okay, enough for today. I’m going to recommend to Dr. Call that you lose the sling if his follow-up X-rays and MRI back me up. You’re healing remarkably well, and your range of motion seems to be almost back to normal. Should I ask Jena, just to be sure?”

  Nick whipped his head around to see Travis grinning as he wrote on the chart.

  Nicholas flushed. “About that, Travis, I—”

  Travis held up his hand. “Nope. None of my business. But talk to Jen, okay? She’s feeling a little…down, I guess. If you tell her I said this, I will kill you, but I think she’s worried about what you’re thinking of her.” Travis’s face was uncharacteristically serious as he waved goodbye and walked toward the office.

  Nicholas leaned against the last machine he’d worked on, watching Jena get the big guy set up on a treadmill before turning to the chart on the table. Something the guy said made her laugh, and she got on the treadmill next to his, joking and smiling as she finished his last few minutes with him.

  Nicholas was surprised at how jealous seeing that made him. He wanted Jena to be laughing with him, not some muscle-bound joker.

  When the patient’s time was up, he stopped the machine and gently took Jena’s hand, pressing a kiss on the back. Nick felt an irrational urge to shove the guy, but by the time he’d halfway crossed the room, the patient was headed out the door.

  Jena immediately raised the speed of her treadmill and went to work in earnest, taking the earphones to the iPod that was strapped on her arm out of her pocket and jamming them in her ears.

  Moving closer, Nicholas leaned on the adjacent treadmill, watching her. Jena’s eyes were closed, and her lips barely moved as she sang quietly along with the music.

  Finally, she slowed, and then stopped, smiling in a satisfied way as she checked her time and distance and pulled up the tai
l of her shirt to wipe the sweat off of her neck. Nick opened the gym bag he was carrying and pushed a towel into her hands, not sure that he could trust himself if she raised the shirt again.

  “Holy shit!” Jena shrieked, jumping back and nearly tumbling off the treadmill as her eyes flew open. “Nicholas! How long have you been there?” She took the towel and quickly wiped her face and neck, looking anywhere but at him.

  “A few minutes. Long enough to see you flirting with the musclehead,” Nicholas teased.

  “Who, Stefan?” Jena laughed and placed the towel on the handrail. “No flirting, I assure you. His girlfriend would kill me. And he’s not a musclehead. He may play football, but he’s also a chemical engineering major with perfect grades.”

  “Yeah, make me feel insignificant beside your rocket scientist boyfriend.” Nicholas nabbed the iPod. “What are you listening to? Since we’re getting to know each other better.”

  She grabbed unsuccessfully for the player.

  Nick raised an eyebrow and grinned as a Prince bump and grind number traveled from the earbud.

  Jena’s face turned red and then she started to laugh, shrugging. “There’s a lot of music on there that’s not sex related.”

  “I disagree,” Nick countered. “All music is sex related. How to get it, how it feels, what happens when it’s wrong, how it feels to lose it, how to get rid of bad lovers…all sex.” He scrolled to the next song. “Except this guy. Who in their right mind would put Josh Groban between Prince and Nine Inch Nails?”

  Jena snatched her iPod out of his hand, laughing. “My music, idiot. No one said you had to like it.”

  Nick took her free hand and was relieved when she didn’t resist. “Nope. But I want to know you, Jena. And now I know that you’ve got the strangest taste in music ever.” He pretended to flinch as Jena playfully raised her other hand. “Give me a chance, okay? I want this, Jena. I want you. Not just your body. You.”

  Jena nodded slowly; she still looked unsure.

  “Let’s go out on an actual date, okay? When are you free this week?” Nicholas scanned his own schedule in his mind, realized ruefully that he had a busy week ahead.