Beautifully Awake

by Riley Mackenzie

  “Headache’s still there and didn’t sleep much. My nerves in the middle of the night were relentless. But,” Kelly motioned to me and smiled softly, “Lili knows exactly what to say to make you feel better. I’d keep her around if I were you.”

  “Oh, I definitely plan on it, thank you. I appreciate hearing kind words about my team.”

  What the hell did that mean?

  “Now let’s get you better, you have a family to get home to. We discussed the logistics last night. Do you have any more questions?” He sat at the edge of her bed.

  “How long will the surgery be? I want to give my husband a call so he knows when to expect me to be finished. Unfortunately, he can’t be here when I go in. He has to pick the twins up from nursery school.”

  “You have twins?” He bowed his head and kicked at something on the floor.

  “Oh, she certainly does and they’re absolutely adorable.” I handed Chase the photo that was still in my hand.

  He stared at the children, and after several long seconds he finally commented. “They’re gorgeous. You’re lucky to have them, Kelly.”

  “Thank you.”

  Chase handed back her picture and turned his attention to the residents lingering at the end of the bed. “Dr. Hunter, take Mrs. Peterson through the logistics of what to expect again.” Then he abruptly rose from the bed.

  The whole time, his eyes remained glazed and distant and aimed directly for the door. I hadn’t known the man long, but his expression was one I’d never seen.

  “Dr. Colton, before you leave?” Kelly snapped him out of his hollow stare. She seemed to notice his change in demeanor as well.

  “Yes?”

  “I need to wake up for my babies.” One of her pooled tears strayed and her voice wavered.

  “You’re at an amazing hospital, Kelly. I have a stellar team. You’re in the best hands possible. I’ll find your husband when I’m through. See you in there.” He gave her a small smile, turned and walked out the door. The mood in the room definitely shifted.

  “So, let’s see…” Guy quickly averted the attention off Dr. Colton’s odd behavior and began to finish Kelly’s questions. “It usually takes about five-six hours and you should be resting comfortably in the recovery room right around seven.”

  I waited for Guy to finish rambling then retreated to the hallway. Dr. Colton’s eyes immediately found mine as he stood, back against the wall, and his hands snaked in his pockets, waiting.

  I shifted my gaze to my tablet and started screwing around. Anything to avoid the awkward tension mounting.

  “I want you there,” he snapped.

  “What, where?” I glanced up from my tablet, hoping he wasn’t really talking to me. I was never around someone who fluctuated moods as fast as a puck traveled across the ice.

  “In the OR.” His eyes reconnected with mine, leaving me to question what he was asking.

  “The OR?”

  “Yes, Ms. Porter, the OR.” His tone was short. I was silent. His request completely baffled me. Why would he want me in the OR? “You with me?” He pulled his hands from his pockets and crossed them over his chest.

  Did I have a choice? “Um … um ... do I have a choice?” Yep, I said it out loud. Shit.

  “You don’t,” he growled. “Kelly needs you there, I need you, so I want you in the OR, period. You with me?” He never blinked, not once. His intensity was insane.

  He needed me? “Um ... um ... okay.” I muttered before I heard Guy at my back whispering, “What’s going on?”

  “Good.” Chase turned to Sam who was tapping away on his tablet, completely oblivious to our conversation. “Dr. Petit, get her scrubs, show her where she needs to go, don’t leave her alone anywhere until I get there. You hear me?”

  “Yeah ... sure...” Sam looked totally caught off guard.

  “Colton, you think this is a good idea?” Guy came to my rescue. “I mean—I don’t think case managers are allowed in the operating room. I’ve been here three years and I’ve never seen one in there before. What if she touches something or-”

  Chase’s bark cut him off mid-sentence. “Hunter, I don’t care whether she’s allowed to be in there or not. I want her in there. Make it happen.”

  Damn. Bad call on the latte this morning. The rumble below was back.

  “Why would he do this to me?” I sighed and swiveled my chair around to face Leanne typing at the nurses’ station.

  “Listen, have you seen that man? He can notch my bedpost.” Her hand twirled a strand of her long blonde hair.

  “Shhh. What’s wrong with you? Can we have one conversation that doesn’t involve men and sex?”

  She shimmied her shoulders. “Why? That’s no fun.”

  “Really.” I grimaced. “Why am I wasting my time talking to you right now?”

  “Come on, Lil, listen, you need to look on the bright side. You have a smokin’ hot brain surgeon to stare at for seven hours, that opportunity doesn’t shine its pretty head very often, no pun intended.” She giggled. “Take advantage, and have a sense of humor.”

  I looked away annoyed. “I do have a sense of humor, when it’s funny! Whatever…”

  “Whatever, what?” Jackson appeared out of nowhere.

  “Hey Jack.” Leanne grinned and I might have been mistaken, but she looked like she batted her eyelashes. “Haven’t seen you around lately, you should visit more often.” Leanne was the female version of Guy; she had no problem flirting with all things male.

  “What’s up, Lee? Yeah, sorry I really do need to make it up here more often.” He winked. Pretty sure Jack notched her bedpost. His gorgeous mulatto skin, built body and glistening smile were a sight most females couldn’t ignore.

  “So, heard you’re in the OR with me today, Lil.” Making himself comfortable, he rested his forearms on the counter in front of me.

  “Didn’t you just get here, Jack? How on earth do you know that already?” I pouted and sat back in my chair, crossing my arms against my chest.

  He snickered. Somehow PAs didn’t have to round at the butt crack like the rest of us. Like ever. I definitely picked the wrong profession.

  “Porter, that’s good gossip. Colton wants you in the OR ... it’s probably on Facebook by now.” He laughed.

  “You think that’s funny ... what the hell am I gonna do in the OR?”

  “Don’t touch shit for one. Wouldn’t want ya infecting the sterile field.” He chuckled again.

  “Glad you find this funny. Is this some kind of sick joke? I can just picture myself throwing up, or better yet passing out,” I moaned, shaking my head in defeat. “Anyway, why are you scrubbing? Thought the case was Guy’s.”

  “Yeah, well it’s mine, and Guy is pissed. You think I’d miss my favorite case? Colton rocks a left frontal lobectomy. We’ll wake her up mid-surgery and get her to talk to us ... it’s awesome.”

  “Awesome? Do you hear yourself, her brain’s gonna be wide open while she’s talking … that’s insane!”

  “Kiddo, you just wait, it’s going to blow your mind.”

  “Yeah, literally—my head might just explode.”

  Jackson laughed out loud. “Dramatic much? You’ll be fine.” He looked at his watch. “I gotta run. See ya in there.” He opened the steel door to the stairs and was gone.

  I cinched my eyes shut and rested my head in my hands. “Lee, save me!” I whined.

  “I’ll save you, babe. I’d gladly switch places with you in a heartbeat.” She stopped typing and leaned in a little closer. “I wish he made all those googly eyes at me. I’m even wearing a smaller scrub top so the girls look perkier.” She grabbed her boobs and gave them a lift, squeezing her cleavage through the small V-neck hole.

  “You’re a nut, I just met the man last night. What the hell does that even mean?”

  “You’re kidding me, please tell me you’re not that naive.”

  “Lee, quit the BS!”

  “Oh really, that hot scorching surgeon can’t take h
is smokin’ eyes off you. Hunter better keep his paws to himself or it’s gonna get ugly.”

  “Huh? What are you even talking about? Do you ever listen to yourself?” She was crazy. “That’s it, you’re officially crazy. Is this what you do—sit behind the nurses’ station and analyze our every move?” I pushed up from my chair and rounded the counter. “You’ve got some imagination ... and Guy, really, he flirts with everyone. He watches you wiggle your ass every time you walk away, for god’s sake.”

  “You’re missing the point.” She got right in my face, her voice sassy as all hell. “This isn’t about Guy. It doesn’t take a freakin’ brain surgeon to figure out what a certain neurosurgeon is thinking. He wants you!” She pointed her finger right at my chest.

  I covered my face with my hands, speechless, as the blush crept up my cheeks. He doesn’t even know me, why on earth would he want me?

  “Lili,” Sam snapped.

  I jerked out of my daze.

  “What?” I clipped, completely flustered.

  “Did you just hear what I said?” He leaned on the counter right next to me.

  “Sorry, Sam, what?”

  “I said, I found you some blue scrubs. Here, take the damn things. It’s not my fault you have to go to the OR. I’ve got work to do. No time for this.”

  I grabbed the scrubs and shoved them under my arm. Sam was definitely annoyed and probably overwhelmed with the demands of being a new intern.

  “Thanks. I’m going to change. I need to get off this floor.”

  “She’s flipping out about a bunch of things today,” Leanne chimed in.

  I looked over my shoulder and gave her a dirty look before storming toward the elevator.

  “Page me when you’re done and I’ll meet you by the OR,” Sam yelled as the elevator doors closed.

  Sam stood with me in the long sun-filled hallway outside the operating room suites. It had the most beautiful view of the Schuylkill River. If you had to go under the knife, at least your last sight was serene. God, that was morbid.

  “He told us to meet him here. You stay put, I don’t want him pissed because I lost you. I’m gonna run inside and grab you a hat, mask and some shoe booties.”

  “Thanks. Hey listen, I’m sorry I snapped earlier. This OR nonsense is definitely not by choice.”

  Sam shook his head and pushed through the swinging door toward the scrub sink. I was actually going into an OR. It was insane. I never wanted to be a doctor, nurse, PA ... nothing involving blood and guts. I reached into my pocket and pulled out my cell.

  U r never gonna believe this…

  About to go into new chief’s OR

  Gotta sit w a patient during surgery

  I’m freakin out

  “Oh good, I caught you.”

  I popped my cell back in my pocket and turned to see Guy heading down the hall. He slapped me on the back and gave me a wink.

  “Blue looks great on you, doll.”

  I blushed. “Thanks.”

  He sort of always knew how to make me feel better.

  “So here’s the deal if you don’t throw up or pass out ... we’re gonna celebrate tonight, my treat.” He smiled and wrapped his arm around my shoulder, pulling me in for a hug.

  “You two look cozy.” Sam chuckled, pushing through the swinging door with my crap.

  “Whatever, Petit, give me that shit.” Guy grabbed the hat, mask and booties from Sam’s hand. Really, shoe booties?

  “Am I interrupting something?” Chase growled.

  No joke, he growled. My heart leaped into my throat. The sound of his voice did something crazy to my insides.

  “Just getting her ready,” Sam interjected.

  My pocket vibrated with a new text. I spun around to face Chase standing directly behind me, totally invading my personal space. I inhaled a sharp breath and my heart rate doubled again. I resisted taking a step back. The distraction of his faded blue scrubs hugging so many of the right places glued me to the floor. With his white lab coat missing, this man standing in front of me was truly a sexy chiseled masterpiece. My nipples peaked and everything lower clenched. This reaction was foreign to me. Nothing in my lower regions ever clenched. Period.

  His piercing gaze scanned my body and oozed intensity. “Blue scrubs, really, Sam?” He was angry. “Get her another fucking color now, any color but blue.”

  Sam and Guy stood motionless with puzzled faces. I was just as confused as they were. No, actually more.

  “I said another color now, Hunter, make this happen.”

  Looking startled, both residents turned and quickly walked away with not a word.

  Embarrassed and aroused was not a good combo. The heat between my legs was slowly rising to my cheeks. I started to ramble, “Oh my god, I’m so sorry, I should have known—blue is totally a doctor color. I should have never put these on, I’ll go change...”

  He put his pointer finger to his lips then motioned me to follow him through the first set of swinging doors. “Come.”

  I followed, unable to resist his magnetic pull. He grabbed a blue cap from the shelf on top of the scrub sink and tied it around the back of his head. The veins in his forearms sliced through his defined muscles. It was sexy as hell. Then he grabbed his mask and pinched it at the bridge of his nose. He proceeded to reach up and tie one set of strings at the top of his head and the other set at the base of his neck. My eyes fixated on the tiny strip of skin peeking out from under the bottom edge of his scrub top. The tease of rock hard abs and bits of dark brown hair trickling below his waistband was enough to almost put me over the edge.

  “Did you eat?” He washed his hands and arms with a scrub brush. I didn’t reply. He turned to face me, his dripping wet arms held high in the air. Only his damn eyes exposed. How was it possible to be that hot in a pair of scrubs? “Lili, did you eat anything today?”

  “Yeah.” Did coffee count? “I’m good, thanks,” I lied. Like hell I ate.

  “I’ll feed you later.” He shook his head, turned and bumped the swinging door with his ass disappearing into the operating room.

  “Huh?” I looked down at my blue scrubs as Sam barreled into the tiny scrub sink room with another pair of scrubs in hand.

  “There you are, here, go change before he goes postal on my ass.”

  “Thanks.” I needed a pause. A big one. In record time I made it to the locker room, changed into the new pair of scrubs and splashed cold water on my face, hoping to refocus. Did he say he was going to feed me? I pulled out my phone. Sierra was good at distraction, and I knew there would be a text waiting.

  So rumors were right huh?

  He’s a dick.

  A dick, yes. A jumpstart to my libido, yes. Together not a good combination. I silenced my ringer, dropped my cell back in my pocket and headed toward the OR. Staring down the empty long hallway I wondered what the hell I was doing on about a million different levels.

  Guy rounded the corner and jogged toward me, interrupting the tailspin going on in my head. “I needed to see it for myself. Sam wasn’t lying when he said they were shit brown.” He laughed. “I would have paid to see you in there. I’m jealous of Jackson.” He bumped my hip, but this time I was ready for him. Also helped that I was in flats. Holy hell. Fuchsia ballet flats with shit brown scrubs ... just lovely. It just kept getting better.

  “Oh shut it, Guy, not helping!”

  He chuckled. “You always look great, show them who’s boss, remember our deal ... just no puking or passing out.” He placed the bouffant blue hat on my head, securing my hair inside. He really was so sweet.

  “Thanks, Guy.”

  “Now go before he gives you shit for being late, seems something crawled up his ass and died today.” He pushed me toward the door. “Wait, Lil, your mask.”

  I so didn’t belong here.

  “Don’t give me that look. Turn around.” He tied my mask at the top of my head and at the base of my neck.

  “I can’t breathe.”

  “Yes y
ou can, pinch the mask at your nose, go get ‘em, doll!” He slapped my ass and pushed me through the swinging doors. It was too late to protest. I was staring at a sea of blue, and I was the only one looking like shit.

  After the case, Chase followed me into the little scrub sink room, tore his mask from his face and ripped his cap from his head. “Lili, go change and meet me in the lobby. And don’t get lost in the recovery room.”

  Really. After seven hours of pure adrenaline, I was exhausted and just wanted to go home. “Um, okay.”

  “And don’t worry about Mrs. Peterson. I have her heavily sedated for tonight, you can see her in the morning.”

  How did he know that’s where I was headed?

  Jackson popped his head into the tiny room. “Kiddo, you rocked it! You were a pro, you totally kept her calm.” He squeezed my arm.

  “Thanks, Jack, appreciate it. The talking definitely lowered both our anxiety levels.” I smiled, remembering our conversation. Kelly relived their last beach vacation and gushed about how adorable her toddler twins were splashing in the water and playing in the sand. A memory I could only wish for.

  “Totally.” Jack smiled and looked over at Chase. “Brilliant, man, sick job in there, great call having Lili sit for the case.”

  Chase half smiled. At least he took a compliment gracefully.

  “Lil, I’ll catch you later, I’m gonna take her to the recovery room and write her orders.”

  “Jack, I’ll take her down to recovery, you just write her orders. Don’t be cheap with the pain meds either, I want her comfortable.”

  Jackson looked confused; maybe attendings didn’t usually roll the patient to recovery. What did I know?

  “Lili, I’m going to get her situated and find her husband. Meet me in the lobby.” His gaze locked with mine as he waited. “Yes?”

  I just wanted to change and go home, but “yeah, fine” came out of my mouth.

  He kept staring until I couldn’t take the awkwardness any more and looked down. Crap, these tan scrubs were freaking hideous.

  5

  Sake

  “Found Mr. Peterson,” Chase said as he strolled through the very posh lobby of Philadelphia Hospital. Could have saved hospital money, leather wasn’t really necessary.