Beautifully Awake

by Riley Mackenzie

  “Tell me what you want, baby.” Baby. No one had ever called me anything so endearing before. My head spun with emotion. “I need to see you come first, then when I’m buried deep inside you, we’ll come together.”

  The magnitude of those words clogged my throat. How could I ever admit that no man had ever brought me to that place, let alone twice?

  “Answer me, Blue.” His guttural growl was impatient; his eyes commanded an answer.

  “I never...” My voice was barely audible. I was at a total loss for words. “Please, just touch me.”

  A flicker of something crossed his eyes, and I hoped he wasn’t going to press me further. I was already in a delirious state, beyond aroused and needy.

  He brought his wet fingers to his lips and sucked. “Baby, you taste so delicious. I can’t wait to feast on your sweetness ... you want these back?” He wiggled his fingers in front of my eyes.

  “Mm-hmm.” I nodded, and my eyes fell shut, waiting for his touch. I was going to lose my mind in endless anticipation. He pushed a tendril of hair from my face and tucked it behind my ear. The motion brought back highlights from sushi dinner. My sex clenched impatiently again.

  “Baby, open your eyes, I want to see you. I need to see your face when you come for me the first time.” His words were too erotic; they almost pushed me over the edge. Is this really happening to me?

  He reached down and stroked me while he found and sucked my breast. I couldn’t focus on anything but every stroke and every touch. Eagerly waiting for the moment he sunk back inside. I whimpered and pleaded with my eyes, gripping and pulling the shit out of his hair. His rhythm never wavered.

  “I know this is what you want.” And in one smooth motion, he thrust two fingers deep inside, stretching my sensitive walls. The pressure was so intense that I came instantly. Shattered. My hips thrust uncontrollably against his delicious fingers. I shuddered a moan as the wave of ecstasy pulsed through me.

  “Let me hear you, baby. I want to hear what I do to you.”

  “Oh yes.” My body convulsed around his fingers, and he continued at a feverish pace. My eyes never fluctuated from his passionate stare.

  No one had ever made me come before. Ever. I had no choice but to hang on and ride it out. Chase let me ride my wave until my body calmed, and my labored breathing slowed. He removed his miracle fingers, caressed my thighs and passionately claimed my mouth.

  “Blue, that was the sexiest fucking thing I’ve ever seen. Your eyes, baby, they went from crystal clear blue to midnight. I almost came just watching you. Fuck, I need to be inside you. I can’t wait a second longer.”

  Still coming down from my wave, I watched him frantically rip the fly of his tailored black suit pants open, tugging them down enough to release his straining erection. It was immense. Intimidatingly long, hard and ridged. He was stunningly beautiful. I wanted to fall to my knees and worship his taste. Did I just think that? Not in a million years had I imagined hearing those words in my head. The meaning was overwhelming.

  I tentatively ran my fingers down his length and he groaned in response. I was in awe. Did he want me just as much as I wanted him? He reached around and pulled a foil packet from his back pocket. It was ripped open and sheathed him in record time.

  “Ready, baby?” He was making sure I was ready. He cared. With that one gesture, he took the time to appreciate and respect my body like no one else ever had. I exploded with want. The emptiness he created was eager to be filled.

  “Blue. You’re so tight. I don’t want to hurt you. I need to know you’re ready.”

  The whisper barely escaped my throat, “Yes,” and I felt him at my entrance. In one continuous motion he buried himself, painfully stretching me to the point of pure pleasure. I cried out and he instantly swallowed my groans. He deserved to hear what he was doing to me. “Oh god, Chase, you feel so good.”

  “You have no idea what you’re doing to me ... fuck, baby.”

  My hips drove forward, meeting his thrust. Perfect synchrony. He pulled almost completely out before slamming back into me with increasing force. Over and over, his pace was punishing. The fire in my core built again, and I matched him thrust for thrust. I am going to come again.

  “Let it go, baby, come. Now.”

  On command, I arched back, and this time I screamed his name. It violently ripped through me; this orgasm more intense that the first. With two more thrusts, Chase’s body shuddered against mine, and he groaned what sounded like my name. Deep inside I felt his final jerks. He stilled and tucked me tightly against his sweat-beaded chest. The intimacy of his embrace matched the entire experience. Perfect.

  “You think you can stand?”

  My legs were a wobbly mess, but I nodded confidently anyway. He had been holding me with such ease since we walked through the door.

  He gently lowered me down, never letting go of my waist, and quickly dealt with the condom.

  “Let’s get you to bed.” He pulled his pants up with one hand and then swooped me into his arms effortlessly, like I belonged there.

  “Down the hall on the right.” I snuggled into the crook of his arm.

  “I know, baby. This will be my second time putting you to bed.” He grinned cockily.

  “Chase, we still need to talk.” The week-long silent treatment still loomed.

  “We will.” He kissed the tip of my nose. I couldn’t help but smile. I had never seen Chase like this. Relaxed. Content. Sated. His gorgeous eyes still held heaviness but Dr. Intensity was gone, at least for now. And I liked it. I liked Dr. Sexy. Holy shit, did I.

  8

  First do not harm

  My small apartment was all of two and a half rooms. It took Chase’s long legs seconds to reach my bedroom, or should I say, nook. Like the entrance hallway, the same long windows flanked the ten-foot walls. Flowing silk pewter draperies secured my privacy but left the top perimeter of glass bare, allowing natural light to filter in.

  I fell in love with the space the day I moved in, but never appreciated it more than I did watching Chase lower me onto my bed. His bare chest and face was illuminated by the soft glow of the night sky. He was dangerously breathtaking.

  “Baby, I need to move the car. I’ll be right back. Don’t move.” He gently lifted the sheet over my naked, sated body and palmed my cheek. He ran the pad of his thumb softly across my bottom lip. Mmm. Definitely not moving. Ever.

  “Okay.”

  Chase turned and quickly disappeared into the darkness beyond my nook. I heard him grab what I could only assume was the remnants of his shirt off the floor, followed by the click of the door. He was gone less than a minute before reality dawned on me. The only reason to re-park the car was if he was planning on staying ... the night ... with me. A pang pinched my side and my stomach flipped.

  I just got mind-blowingly fucked against a wall and the thought of Dr. Orgasm spending the night with me made me suddenly nervous. Really, Lil? Thinking to yourself in third person was never a good sign, so I abruptly ended my lunacy and raced to the bathroom, hoping to get cleaned up before Chase got back. Time was tight.

  As dreamy as the “don’t move” plan sounded, my post-sex reality was a far cry from all my romance novels. It had been a really long time, not that I could ever compare tonight to any experience I had in the past, but I vaguely remembered the “freshly-fucked” look not being my best. My mascara-smudged face screamed anything but sexy. Not to mention my thighs felt like they were stuck together with Elmer’s glue. Thank god for Sierra, her pre-wedding laser hair removal obsession totally worked out in my favor.

  I washed up and had just enough time to tug on a clean tank and thong and then climbed back into bed. I heard his footsteps. Excitement and relief washed through me. A small part of me feared he might have changed his mind, but my insecurity vanished the second his chiseled face appeared from the darkness.

  His shirt hung open. He folded his arms across his chest and casually leaned against the wall, studying me like the
MRI images he methodically memorized before each surgery.

  “You moved?” His lips parted into a half grin, and he shook his head disapprovingly.

  “You took too long.”

  “You put clothes on.”

  “You might need some new clothes.” I smiled.

  “You’re fucking beautiful.”

  Speechless.

  Chase dropped his arms, pushing the world’s now-sexiest shirt back to the floor. Before I formed a coherent thought after his last statement paralyzed me, he stripped. Naked. Effortlessly comfortable in his own skin. He stood there torturing me with his burning gaze. This man deserved his limitless confidence. His body was a work of erotic art. If there was a museum of hot bodies, he’d be the featured exhibit. I would have bought a lifetime membership.

  Two strides later, the mattress dipped beside me to accommodate all of him. I felt so small in my own bed, so fragile. Strangely enough, I’d also never felt so safe.

  Lying on his side he propped his head with his elbow, our faces inches apart. His hooded gaze was piercing. He began to stroke my arm, shoulder to elbow. His seductive tickle was blissful torture. Pure intimacy.

  His rhythmic movement exposed the inked art that cascaded down the side of his ribs.

  I’d never had an opinion either way when it came to tattoos. Plenty of the guys back home had them. Some were more appealing than others. It was almost a high school right of passage in my town. But what always fascinated me was not why people got them, but what they chose. The motivation behind the actual mark. Finding an image significant enough to warrant a permanent brand.

  Chase’s tattoo was striking and beyond hot. Masculine, yet sensual. The sharp symbols were the color of midnight, a hard contrast to his bronzed skin. Each fine line sliced the contour of his chiseled physique. I longed to run my mouth down each character.

  Without thought, I traced his etching. “What does it say?”

  He didn’t respond. Instead he lifted my fitted tank over my head and returned to his tender ministrations. His focus adjusted to the edge of my sensitive breast.

  “I thought we were going to talk.” My voice was breathless.

  “We are talking. But don’t ask me not to touch you.” No objection there. His thumb brushed my taut nipple.

  “Mmm.” My back arched, and my pulse raced in response. Every nerve in my body was ready to abandon the talking plan in favor of the fondling plan when Chase read my mind.

  “Talk, baby. I can do both.”

  “What happened last week? After we, um, kissed. You were ... different?”

  “I fucked up. Period. I have no intention of letting it happen again.” He stroked my cheek and brushed his soft lips over mine. Intensity plagued his eyes again. “Do you trust me, Blue?”

  Trust me. It was impossible he knew the enormity of what he asked. I spent years struggling to trust myself again. Suddenly I was torn. As much as I wanted an answer for his Jekyll and Hyde behavior, I’d rather not taint this tantalizing moment with my issues.

  “Sorry handsome, I don’t trust that easily. You’ve got to work for it.” I flashed a cheeky smile hoping to lighten the mood and shut down Dr. Intensity for now.

  “What did you have in mind?”

  Ahh. Hello, Dr. Playful.

  “Um. You didn’t answer my question, your tattoo. What does it mean?”

  His answer was matter of fact. “First do no harm.”

  “Are these Chinese or Japanese characters?” My fingertip memorized his ink.

  “I do believe it’s my turn, but if you must know it’s neither. They are Romaji characters.

  “Huh?” Oops. It slipped out.

  He chuckled. “It’s Latin script applied to the Japanese language. There is no literal translation for first do no harm in Japanese.”

  “Well hello, Dr. Know-it-All.” I giggled.

  “Baby I’m gonna know a lot more before the night is over, including every inch of your body. Truth for truth.” He leaned down and sucked my hard nipple, reigniting my core. My thong dampened. God help me. I wondered how long I could last at this little game. I was so turned on. “What did you mean before when you said I never?”

  Crap. Obviously not a beat-around-the-bush kind of guy. He turned his attention to my other breast. Not waiting for my response, he drew that nipple into his hot mouth, flicking the bud with his tongue.

  “I’m waiting, Blue, tell me.” We weren’t having this conversation. He sucked harder and bit down. I moaned in ecstasy. “Truth. Tell me.”

  “I couldn’t answer your question because, um, no one’s ever made me ... you know,” I panted.

  “Never made you what? Say it, baby.”

  “Come.” Holy shit. I said that out loud. Heat hit my cheeks. “I was only ever with my ex, and um, it never quite happened for me. I just thought I was one of those women who couldn’t get off from sex. Thankfully, you shot that theory to shit ... twice.” It was like he shot me with truth serum.

  “What a selfish, fucking idiot.” His voice got angry. Oh, you have no idea. “Watching you come was the sexiest thing I have ever seen. His loss was my honor. I can’t wait to put that look back on your beautiful face and hear you scream my name again. I’m giving you advanced warning—you can retire your vibrator, baby, because I don’t share.”

  Oh. My. God.

  “I don’t ... actually ... have one.”

  “Bullshit, baby. I just acquainted myself with your greedy pussy, there’s no way she’s been satisfied with your little fingers ... truth.”

  Shoot me now.

  “Okay. Fine. The shower head, okay?” The flame in my cheeks burned. “Can we stop talking about this?”

  His lips turned up slightly.

  “A shower head, huh? Don’t be embarrassed ... that’s fucking hot, baby. I’m hard just picturing it.” He rolled on top of me, supporting most of his weight on his arms and pushed his hard length into my stomach. It felt even bigger than before. Not possible. My fingertips explored every muscle of his rippled back as if it was Braille and held a secret message.

  “Um, thanks, but it’s your turn ... embarrassing story.” I kissed his chin.

  “First, that was selfish fuck-face’s embarrassing story, not yours. Understand?” he clipped, as if he was defending my honor.

  What could I say to that? “Um. Thanks ... but it’s still your turn.”

  “Okay. Is falling off stage embarrassing enough?” A small laugh escaped his lips. “When we were in high school, we were in a band. Mostly to piss the parents off. One weekend we did a gig in the village, a real dive of a club. The stage was a total piece of shit. Mid-riff, I tripped over a guitar pedal and fell flat on my face, right off the stage.”

  The visual flashed in my mind and I chuckled. “Aw. Did you get hurt?”

  He growled and sucked my ear. “Yeah, totally busted my ego.”

  “Poor baby. Glad to see you made a full recovery with no long lasting effects.”

  “Took a shit load of Band-Aids.”

  I liked Dr. Playful.

  “So what happened to the band? Is that how it all ended?”

  “Yeah ... a real tragedy.”

  I sensed the nostalgia come over him. Anyone else I would let savor the moment, but for some reason, I was slowly learning that even the most random moments of silence seemed to summon Dr. Intensity. And music definitely seemed to be a sore subject. I was enjoying Dr. Playful too much to risk the moment souring.

  “So you couldn’t make it as a rock star in the big city, so you totally sold out and became a brain surgeon ... psst ... underachiever.” As if. I couldn’t keep a straight face if I tried.

  “Glad I entertained you. But can we end this enlightening game now? I have other plans for entertaining you. How’s your math?”

  Just like that, Chase’s playful eyes glazed over with unmistakable hunger that was mesmerizing. He uttered a low growl. Mmm. Dr. Sexy. Dropping more of his body weight on me, his hands reached into my hair,
massaging my scalp. It was maddening. I had never felt anything even close to this. His strong thighs nudged my legs apart to accommodate his large body, his erection brushed against my flat stomach. Years of reluctance were replaced with thoughts of him filling me again. My hips instinctively pushed up greedily, wanting all of this man.

  His lips covered mine while his tongue explored and claimed every inch of my mouth, completely devastating my senses. My hands mimicked his tongue, mapping his back and his god-like ass. If this was all a sick dream, I never wanted to wake up.

  He broke our kiss and pushed up until he was sitting on his knees. His hands reached under me, cupping my bottom to roll my thong down as far as my spread legs would allow. He lifted my legs and jerked the drenched fabric over my feet and sent it sailing across the room.

  “Better,” he growled.

  Instead of dropping my legs back down, Chase opened my thighs wide, and pressed my knees against my breasts. My sex was completely open and exposed. Lord help me.

  “Damn, you’re beautiful, I can’t wait to taste you.” His expression was that of a man starved. “Already so wet for me.” He spread me with his fingers, staring intently. He licked his lower lip and my walls clenched with anticipation. My hips automatically rose. If I wasn’t so drugged with lust I would have been mortified, we just had sex. Shouldn’t this be gross? This was all new to me.

  Selfish fuck-face (I liked Chase’s name for him better) made it clear on more than one occasion that “going down” was a waste of his time since I couldn’t get off anyway. Like I suffered from a sexual disability, and all attempts at therapy were futile.

  His look alone as he examined for the perfect spot to launch his assault could have set off my detonation. My thighs shook with a fine tremor of excitement, while my tension within built at a furious pace. Chase’s stormy eyes glued to my sex as he lowered his face to just above my opening and inhaled my scent.

  “Mmm, so sweet.”

  My head fell back, my fingers tangled his hair, and my bottom shot up all in unison, begging for release.