Beautifully Awake
Page 34
He looked like he wanted to say something, but I wasn’t finished. I covered his lips with a finger. His eyes turned glassy. Slowly I worked my way down his body, my lips trailed along his tattoo. First do no harm. I finally understood its true significance. “This,” I traced each character, “is not your reminder ... this is truth. This is you.”
Chase needed to realize he never harmed anyone, not his sister, not his unborn child. He could never harm anyone. The emotion in the room was thick and in that moment there was nothing left to say. So I wrapped my body around him, and we held each other until the morning sun streamed through my windows.
Over the next week we didn’t really talk about that night again. We didn’t need to. We were both beautifully awake and blissfully living.
“I’ll send Pete to pick up your parents.”
“I’m gonna go with him. I want to be there when they get off the plane. I already took a half day. It’s Friday, and luckily, pretty slow on peds.” Their plane was arriving around four.
“You know I would come if I could, but I really need to finish up a couple things here first.” He seemed totally distracted and he had since last night.
“That’s fine. You sure everything is okay?” The only interruption we’d had to our bliss this week was a couple of cryptic phone calls Chase answered and physically left the room for, always business, and not just Asher. Lawyers, bankers, real estate brokers, financial advisors—Chase had a whole freaking team. The conversations I easily tuned out usually began with lots of numbers. I was probably in the loop a little more than I needed to be, but we had no secrets, and Chase was very comfortable talking about his financial security. He wanted me to be comfortable discussing it as well. I was still adjusting; it was going to take time. Being financially comfortable was not something I was used to and I wasn’t sure if I would ever be. Anyway, the last couple of days I felt like he was hiding something from me.
“Everything’s great. Excited for the weekend?” He kissed my lips. “Go, beautiful, you took a half day, go get your nails done or something. Where do you want Pete to pick you up?”
“Your apartment,” I said.
We decided my dad and Sharon would stay at my place for the weekend. Most of my stuff was in Chase’s anyway, because as he liked to remind me on a daily basis, “One of us has to be up before the sun while the other hits snooze a few dozen times. Gotta take advantage of proximity, baby.” Justifiable argument, but his sarcasm deserved the eye roll it got daily as well. Except when he added, “And I’m sure as fuck not going to sleep any earlier, not when your gorgeous body is lying next to me. No chance I’m wasting one precious second.” Yeah, that deserved way better than an eye roll. Mmm.
“Okay, baby, I’ll tell Pete. You gonna take them right to your apartment?”
“That’s what I was thinking, figured they might want to freshen up before dinner.”
“Perfect, see you then.” He kissed me one last time and disappeared down the hall. Obviously in a rush to do something.
28
HEA
Maybe he was trying to tell me my nails sucked. They did. My nervous habit wreaked havoc on my cuticles. I stood in the nail salon, staring at the rainbow of colors in front of me. If Sierra weren’t busy with her legs in the air I would have dragged her with me. But her OB insisted she take it easy for the next couple of weeks since her legs all of a sudden looked like they belonged to a baby elephant. One of the perks of being nine months pregnant at the end of August.
I flipped the nail bottles over one by one to read the name on the bottom. Such a girl habit. Even sillier was trying to guess the abbreviations the nail girls Sharpied on the top. Ha! This one was perfect. I pulled out my phone and typed Sierra a quick text she would appreciate.
Getting nails done.
HEA!
Confused???
Oh. I was disappointed with my BFF. Was she slacking on her romance novels?
Really?! Come on.
Know you have a book in ur hand!
What are we always waiting for??
Asspuck, look in the mirror-
Pretty sure we BOTH found it already :)
Her text hit me in the gut, in a good way. A really fan-freakin-tastic way.
True :)
No one deserves her Happily Ever After…
More than you!
Right back at ya.
Xoxo
I caught a couple of ladies staring in my direction. I’m sure they were wondering what the hell I was smiling at. My smile even felt huge to me. They’d be jealous.
Three hours sounded so much longer than it was in reality. Why was that? A manicure, a Whole Foods shop and a latte (decaf) drop off to the swollen BFF, and now I was running late. And I thought I’d have time to squeeze in a run. Yeah, not so much. I barely had time to shower and change. My hair still wet, I yawned and grabbed my fabulous smaller-than-luggage bag, eager to head for the airport. Eager to see my dad. Suddenly, a quiet night at home, just the four of us, sounded like a much better idea than whatever delicious restaurant Chase picked. No question, that was more my dad and Sharon’s speed anyway, especially after traveling all day. I was tempted to text Chase to see if he’d mind, but I didn’t. He was so thoughtful about this weekend, planning everything and arranging for my dad to celebrate my birthday with us. I would never disappoint him, didn’t matter how exhausted I was.
Luckily, we made it to the airport with time to spare. No traffic on a Friday afternoon was shocking. Sierra kept me company on the phone while I waited by the baggage carousels.
“Babydoll!”
I had missed that deep voice.
“Sier, they’re here. Got to go ... yes, I’ll tell them you say hi. Maybe we’ll try and pop by this weekend ... my dad would love to see you too. If you’re nice, we’ll bring you a cheesesteak. Yeah ... okay ... mm-hmm ... bye.” I shoved the phone in my bag and made my way toward the escalator.
“Hi Dad.” I flung my arms around his neck. It didn’t matter how old I was, I was always his little girl. “I missed you, I’m so glad you’re here.”
“You look amazing, babydoll!”
Sharon stood back a little bit and gave us our moment. She was thoughtful and sweet. Perfect for my dad and I was grateful he had her.
I kissed her on the cheek and gave her a real hug. “I’m so sorry I missed you when I was home.” I knew she would never hold it against me, knowing what went down the last time I was home, but I still needed to say it.
“Me too. I was jealous of Dana. She said you looked radiant and you absolutely do.”
“We’re just so happy to be here. My birthday girl looks beautiful. And so happy.”
“Thanks, guys. I am. I really am.”
My dad wrapped an arm around my waist and we made our way toward the exit, bypassing the baggage claim.
“Wait, do you have any other luggage?”
“Nope, this is it.” They rolled small matching suitcases behind them. They were too cute.
“Great, Chase’s car is right outside.”
“You left his car at the drop-off curb? Are you crazy, babydoll? It’s gonna get towed.” He gave me one of his famous did I teach you nothing looks. Did he really think I was that dumb?
“Noooo, Dad. Pete’s waiting with the car,” I said that like it was common hat to have a driver. This was going to be a little weird; I knew what was coming next.
“Who’s Pete?”
Chase’s financial comfort wasn’t a secret, but I never really made it a point to discuss exactly how comfortable he was with my dad.
“Um ... Pete’s his driver.”
“As in his personal chauffeur?” Obviously Dad had no patience for beating around the bush.
“Yeah, I guess you could call him that…” He was really so much more, but how did I even begin to explain Chase’s loyalty to Pete? It was Chase’s story to tell, not mine.
“Hmmm. Interesting.” Dad was being polite, or trying. His poker face needed
as much work as mine. Totally genetic. He probably wanted to say something more along the lines of, Who the hell needs a driver, are his feet and hands broken?
“I know Dad, I agree.” I shrugged, hoping my dad read between the lines and saw I was still as Wrangel as he was. That Chase’s money was just that to me ... just money. The cars, the dinners, the clothes—that was all part of Chase’s world; a world I couldn’t give two shits about.
“Oh shut it, Jim.” Sharon smacked my dad’s chest jokingly before he said anything else. “If the man thinks he needs a driver, so be it. Just so happens we need a ride. Right? Anyway I can’t wait to meet your Chase, sweetie. He sounds lovely.”
Your Chase. That sounded even lovelier.
“Thanks, Shar.”
“And after I scold him a bit, remind me I really want to thank him. I’ve never flown first class before. Did you know they give you free drinks?”
I chuckled at how cute she was. “Well, I hope you took advantage.”
Dad smirked and shook his head. “Oh, she did.”
Pete jumped out of the town car as soon as he saw us. “Mr. Porter, Mrs. Porter ... lovely to meet you.”
“Thanks, you too.” My dad shook Pete’s hand. Sharon, on the other hand, blushed pink. Pete was charming—I gave her that. Dad teasingly shot her a look and she mouthed back, “What?” Too freaking cute.
Pete opened the back door for us and we all slid in. I could already tell this was going to be a great weekend. “So I thought we’d go back to my apartment, so you can get settled and relax before dinner. Chase will meet us there.”
“Sounds good to me, babydoll.” My dad kissed my temple and I snuggled into his side. Yep, great weekend.
My apartment was small, really small, but it felt anything but cramped. With my dad and Sharon there, it was cozy and warm. I couldn’t remember the last time we spent quality time like this together. Just relaxed and comfortable, without the oversized elephant of that night in the room. My dad and I were kicked back on the couch, while Sharon sat at the table next to us with my laptop open, Googling the location of the Rocky statue. The look of disbelief on her face when I told her it was at the bottom of the museum steps, not the top, was priceless. She looked like she just heard that Santa wasn’t real for the first time. No way Dad and I were letting her live it down. She was hysterical, or as Asher would say, a hoot. We were still busy teasing her when the doorbell rang.
He rang the doorbell? I pushed up off the couch smiling. Chase had his own key to my place, but out of respect for my dad he rang the doorbell. I loved that. This man earned some serious brownie points.
I started talking before I even got the door open. “Hey, we were wondering when you were going to get here-” My heart swelled when I saw him. This man never failed to shock me.
It took him a little longer to get here because he obviously stopped home to change. Instead of standard work attire, which was GQ worthy on a bad day, Chase wore faded jeans and a t-shirt. A simple, perfectly fit, white t-shirt. One arm cradled a few pizza boxes, while the other held a shopping bag with two six packs of beer and a CRUMBS bag. He was beautiful.
“Hi, gorgeous.” He walked in and pretended not to notice how moved I was and kissed the tip of my nose. “Thought you guys might be tired and want to hang low tonight and catch up. Hope you don’t mind pizza and salad? We can go out tomorrow…”
My dad clapped his hands together and stood up. “Now that’s what I’m talking about! Good to see ya, son. Let me give you a hand with that.”
Screw brownie points, Chase just earned a lifetime of free sex points.
Chase exchanged pleasantries with Sharon and Dad and set everyone up with a beer and some pizza. Then he came to find me in the kitchen. I was taking a pause.
“You okay, baby?” He looked at me suspiciously. A tight knot squeezed the back of my throat. I had to swallow it down before I could speak.
“Yeah, I’m fine, really.” I chalked my moment up to hormones. Poor Sierra, was this what she dealt with every day?
Chase cupped my cheeks. “Truth, baby. Talk to me.”
I lifted up onto my tippy toes and kissed his nose. “I just love this. All of it. The pizza, the beer, the cupcakes. I know it sounds stupid, but I even love that you thought to grab freaking paper plates. Just being here like this—you, me, my dad, Sharon. It’s exactly how I wanted tonight to go, and I didn’t even know that until we got back here. But you knew. You didn’t have to ask, you just knew what I needed. You knew. I love that. I love you. Thank you.” I meant every single word with every fiber of my being.
He squinted in disbelief then whispered, “Thank me for what?”
Oh god, I wanted to cry. It was paper plates. I needed to get a grip. Freaking paper plates. But it wasn’t, it was so much more. My tears wet his thumbs, but he didn’t wipe them away. He didn’t shift. He just stared into my eyes until I blinked the last tear away. Until I saw clearly again. And I saw it crystal clear. I knew exactly what I was thankful for, and it sure as hell wasn’t paper plates. I closed my eyes and mumbled against his soft lips, “Thank you for giving me my HEA.” It felt beautiful to say it out loud.
Chase took my lips against his as an invitation, as I hoped he would, and kissed me senseless. And all of his gentleman points would had been out the window if my dad walked in the kitchen, but I didn’t care. Not one bit.
“I might not have a clue what you’re talking about, Blue, but I promise you haven’t seen anything yet.” He kissed my lips, then my nose, then each eyelid. Mmm. “We better join your dad and Sharon before they wonder where we went. Fuck...” He stepped back an inch, smirking, before he finished that thought. “You can tell Sierra we have something else in common ... we’re both praying for short and soft right about now.” And then I laughed … really loud.
“Um, so that was a little awkward,” I said, toeing off my flats in Chase’s bedroom. Pete brought us home a little before midnight. Home, I liked the sound of that.
“Which part? Sharon asking you if reading Fifty Shades of Grey would make your dad happy? That was fucking classic. Thinking she probably should have stopped at the second beer.”
“Uhh, could have done without that reminder.” I had already forgotten that, more like blocked it from my short-term memory. “You’re right, that definitely was awkward, but I was referring to saying goodnight to my dad and leaving my apartment so I could sleep in your bed.” Didn’t matter how old I was, I was still his daughter.
Chase fisted the back collar of his t-shirt and pulled it off over his head. I loved when he did that. “No, Blue ... awkward would have been them staying in the spare room right across the hall, and your dad hearing us not sleep. Because let’s be honest, baby, no fucking way we’re going to sleep right now. And, baby ... you are definitely not quiet.” His grin was too sexy.
“Um, ya think?” I pursed my lips together and unzipped my jeans, way slower than necessary. He definitely deserved a little show. He earned it big time tonight.
“Fuck it, this needs to be fast,” he growled. Huh?
Minutes later, I was naked on my back with my HEA buried deep, and I was definitely not quiet. So far from it.
We both came down from, um—coming, when I said, “So not complaining, but I’m curious, why’d we have to be fast?” I accentuated the “so” because I was so not complaining, but Chase never did fast. Ever.
“Because I didn’t want to be a panting fucking mess ready to explode when I did this.” He rolled off of me to open his nightstand drawer. He pulled something out and quickly rolled back to face me, nodding over to the alarm clock that still topped the dresser across the room. Midnight.
“Happy birthday, Blue.” He kissed the tip of my nose.
He placed a small box in my hand. It wasn’t a velvet box or a Tiffany blue box. It wasn’t that kind of box at all. The small glass case was frosted blue and topped with a stunning abalone mother of pearl shell that was a mixture of amazing iridescent blues.
“I love you. Chase, this is stunning and already the best birthday ever. And it’s only two minutes in, thank you.” My lips brushed his to send the message home.
“Baby, open the box.” I was a bit taken aback. I thought the gorgeous jewelry box was the gift, but I guess I shouldn’t have been surprised. I lifted the glass lid. Sparkles danced like raindrops lighting up the room and my smile, which in turn, illuminated Chase’s smile. But it wasn’t the diamonds in the bracelet that stole my breath away; it was the ocean blue stones that separated the diamonds. They were all translucent shades that could not be replicated. Each as smooth as glass.
“Sea glass?” I whispered, enamored.
“Doesn’t even come close to the real thing, but I wanted you to see a glimmer of what I see when I look in your eyes, Blue. Color and sparkle, baby. You are beautiful...” His fingertips grazed my cheeks. “I want to spend forever awake, staring into your eyes.”
There were no words to describe the tidal wave of emotion crashing down upon me. None. Why even try? I felt so cherished and adored, truly and utterly loved. He loved me.
He secured the stunning bracelet on my wrist. A small silver charm dangled from the clasp. The inscription stole my heart: beautifully awake.
For the past three years, fear of waking back up to life terrified me. Sleep-running had been my safe haven. My time to heal. Now the thought of being anywhere else but living in the moment, feeling everything life had to throw at me was unimaginable. Different circumstances had put us to sleep, but together we fought that battle. Finding each other and winning the fight woke us both up.
“Forever,” I said. Forever was my answer. I didn’t cry. I smiled. No more tears. Not even happy tears. Not tonight. Tonight, I needed to share forever with the man I loved. My happily ever after, even if it took all night long.