by Andi Bremner
He pulled away and sat back, his body not touching mine, his hand gone from between my legs. It was only then in his absence that I realized he’d misinterpreted my head shaking.
“Luke,” I whispered, “I didn’t mean no. I meant no—don’t stop. I don’t want you to stop.”
He looked at me, the muscles in his neck working. “You sure?”
I nodded.
Quickly he kicked off his jeans and his underwear before lying back down beside me. This time he kissed me gently, tenderly as if afraid I would break.
His hand slipped between my legs and he started circling my entrance as his thumb flicked over my clit.
“You feel like heaven, baby,” he murmured, making me shiver, “I’ve never felt anything like it.”
I opened my legs a little and waited as he shifted, moving between them. He held himself up on his arms, his body hovering over mine as he lowered himself down. He kept one hand on me, holding me open and I felt him move against me, slowly edging inside.
“You are so tight. I don’t want to hurt you.”
“It doesn’t hurt,” I assured him, wiggling a little. “It feels good. Very good.”
“How’s that ache?”
I giggled. “It’s back.”
He kissed me then, his mouth moving over mine as he inched in a little further. I could feel him filling me, stretching me and it didn’t hurt. It felt nice, right. Better than that.
“Is that it?” I asked as he sank a little further into me.
He shook his head. “Barely, babe. Open your legs a little wider for me.”
I complied, spreading them out so that they weren’t anywhere near his body. He sank further in and I shivered, clutching onto his shoulders. He was covered with a fine sheen of perspiration and trembled slightly. I realized he was having a hard time controlling himself.
I heard him swallow. “Bend your knees.”
Again I complied and I heard him groan as he sank in farther. I closed my eyes and bit my lip as discomfort, but not pain, began to throb in my nether regions.
“God, Trin, I’m sorry,” he whispered in my ear and then plunged deeper.
The breath was knocked out of me and I dug my nails into his shoulders. Okay, so now that hurt.
“Do you—” he asked in a strangled voice. “Do you want me to stop?”
I could have died right then. My heart turned over in my chest. He was buried in me, covered in perspiration and was still offering to stop. Still thinking of me.
“Please don’t,” I told him honestly, “it hurt but it doesn’t hurt anymore. I want this.”
He nodded and then began to move. Tentatively at first, as if afraid to hurt me anymore but when I moved against him and clutched onto his shoulders he began to move faster and more confidently, pushing deeper and deeper into me with each thrust.
“God, Trin,” he grunted against my throat. “You are like heaven. So hot and wet and tight. I’ve never felt anything like it.”
Reaching down he touched my clit again which was still swollen and ready from before. Just a flick of his finger had me gasping for breath. I bucked against him.
“God, I’m gonna come,” he warned me, “come with me, Trin.”
And I did. I bucked against him and I cried out his name as I heard him cry out mine and then kiss me, his tongue sinking hungrily and greedily into my mouth.
He kept muttering about heaven and at that moment in time I was inclined to agree with him.
Chapter Eleven
Luke
I was alone when I woke again. I felt the loss of her body beside me like a physical pang and rolled over, sitting upright on the very uncomfortable mattress.
After the first time Trinity had let me make love to her again, this time slower and better. And she’d come for me again when I asked her to. I rubbed a hand over my face as memories of last night came flooding back, the finer details that had imprinted themselves deeply onto my brain. Her smell, the feel of her skin against mine, her body wrapped around me, the tiny giggle that make my heart melt. Never had I felt anything like this before. Not with Melissa, not with any other girl. Just Trinity.
But she’d left me again.
I frowned at the thought as I took in my surroundings. Bright morning light streamed in around the frayed and pretty useless curtains. The room was a shit hole, with peeling paint on the walls and faded, threadbare carpet. I thought I could smell rising damp too. The only piece of furniture was this mattress on the floor covered by thin white sheets. In the corner were several bags of clothes, which I assumed were Trinity’s.
Why the fuck was she living in a place like this? Once more I was reminded that I barely knew this girl at all. That she didn’t want me to know her and that only a few days ago she’d pushed me away.
But that was over now, after last night…
I pushed back the covers and pulled my boxers on. A glimpse of red on the sheets made me pause and a roll of guilt washed over me. She’d been a virgin. I’d never slept with a virgin before. I felt like she’d given me a gift, something marvelous that I didn’t quite deserve, and I also felt a strange perverse, cave man like possessiveness about it now. I never wanted anyone to go where I’d been last night.
But where was she?
Getting to my feet I covered the evidence of our play last night with an old pink duvet from the bottom of the bed and pulled on my jeans. Then I padded out into the hallway, pausing when I heard voices. They were coming from the kitchen at the front of the house so I followed them, expecting to find Trinity and probably this Mark dude she shared with.
Instead I didn’t find Trinity, but I did find three guys sitting around drinking coffee and watching TV.
“Hey man, you’re up,” one of them drawled.
I stared at him. He wore nothing but a pair of shorts and had a very scruffy beard and long hair that looked as if it needed a good wash. The other two were dressed similarly. They were sitting on the sofa in the living room, staring at the box.
“Where’s Trinity?” I asked.
“Working man,” one of them said, “left about half an hour ago. Said to let you sleep.”
She left me. She’d gone to work and hadn’t woken me? I tried to tell myself that it was just her way of being considerate and it wasn’t her way of sneaking out on me. After last night she had to know that she was mine right? That this thing we had was bigger than just a date or a fling or whatever she tried to make it out to be.
“Right,” I ran a hand through my hair and looked at the guy who’d been doing the talking. The guy with the beard. “You must be Mark?”
“Yeah man,” he said, “and you’re the guy that had my girl Trin in there screaming for half the night.”
My insides hardened at his words and I wasn’t sure if it was because he called her “my girl" or because he was referring to the sex we’d had. I didn’t want him doing either.
“’Bout time that chick got laid,” one of the other guys said. “She’s been way too uptight. Now let’s hope she loosens up a little.”
“Ah, leave her alone,” Mark said, “she’s a good girl. Got it tough, with that bitch of a mother of hers.”
I wanted to punch these guys but I stopped myself for one reason only. They knew Trinity.
“What about her mother?” I asked, trying to sound casual and not like I was desperate for information.
“Total bitch,” Mark told me, “and screwed in the head too. All kinds of fucked up. She’s been treating Trin like shit for years, but now she’s taken it to a whole new level chucking her out of home and fucking up her face like that.”
I swallowed. So it was Trinity’s mother who had hit her. A coldness settled in the pit of my stomach at the idea that her own mother would hurt her. That anybody could hurt someone like her.
“She kicked her out?” I asked, I settled on that piece of information.
“Yeah, she’s done it before,” Mark told me, “When her man comes over Trin isn’t welcome
to stay there at all. Has to skedaddle out of the way.”
“Where does she go?”
Mark looked at me then and shrugged. “You know Trin. Sleeps in her car. Sometimes in a hostel.”
Fuck. She was homeless.
“I’ve always said she could stay with me, got that spare room and all, but she never wanted to, not with Melody here. Didn’t want to cramp our style. But now that Melody’s gone…” his voice trailed off and I realized the conversation, about Trinity at least, was over. He was going to start telling me about his wife running out on him and quite frankly, I didn’t want to hear it.
I wanted to talk to Trinity.
“You wanna beer?” he asked suddenly.
I shook my head. It was nine in the morning. “No thanks. I’d better go too.”
“Catch ya,” he said and then leaned forward. “You planning on seeing Trin again?”
“Definitely.”
He grinned. “Good. Because I tell you that girl needs a guy that can make her scream like that and forget all the shit she has going on in her life.”
****
I went home before I went to see Trinity. My phone had died over night so I chucked that on charge just in case Trinity had texted or called and then jumped in the shower although I didn’t really want to wash the smell of her off me just yet. Before, I’d always been one to jump straight in the shower after sex but now… I just wanted to keep the smell of her on me.
God she was so fucking adorable.
I shampooed my hair and closed my eyes, remembering some of the finer details of last night. Here, in the privacy of the shower I was able to do that without worrying about embarrassing myself. Here I could think about her tiny, perfect body, about the way she groaned in the back of her throat, about the way her eyes went round and wide and about how good she felt beneath me, wrapped around me.
I remember her giggling, during sex, when I asked her about the ache. She’d giggled. I’d never heard anything so fucking sexy in my life as my girl giggling during sex.
I couldn’t wait to see her again. And I needed to see her. I frowned. I didn’t like the fact that she’d left that morning without waking me. Nor did I like the fact she was living in that house with Mark and his mates and that her mother was a grade one bitch. I didn’t like that she’d had a shit upbringing and that at times was homeless. There was so much about her life that I didn’t like, but at least they were things I could fix.
Stepping out of the shower I quickly dried off and got dressed. I was heading over to The Bean to see her again.
I checked my phone and found five missed calls from Melissa. This made me pause and frown. Then there were a couple of missed calls from my mother too.
Ignoring the texts—there were half a dozen from Melissa, I called my mom as I made my way out to my car.
“Hi, Mom,” I said when she answered, “I missed your call.”
“Oh my goodness, Luke I was getting worried,” she said. “I’ve been calling and calling you all morning.”
“Sorry. Phone went flat.”
“I don’t see why you can’t have a landline. Cell phones aren’t as reliable as people think.”
I unlocked my car and jumped in. “Was it something important mom?”
“Oh. Yes. I’ve invited Melissa’s parents over for dinner tonight, and Melissa too of course,” she paused as I stiffened, already knowing what her next words were going to be. “You will be here won’t you? It will be awkward if you are absent.”
“Mom,” I began patiently, “Melissa and I aren’t together anymore. It might be more awkward if I was there.”
“Not at all,” she told me quickly, “it will make it just like old times. The Newtons will be wondering where you are if you aren’t here and I know you and Melissa are still friends.”
I snorted. “Barely. Mom, she almost ruined a date I was on the other night.” I started the engine and reversed out of the lot.
My mom was quiet and I could imagine her expression turning to stone at the mention of a date. Eventually she spoke. “A date. With a girl?”
“Well it wasn’t another dude that’s for sure.”
“Don’t be smart, Luke,” she snapped. “Well. So are you going to see this girl again?”
“Definitely.”
“Luke…” she began and then trailed off. She had nothing, nothing to lecture me over and I could tell that it annoyed her that my personal life was none of her business. “Well, it doesn’t mean you can’t come to dinner tonight. And, if you like, you could bring the new girl.”
There was no way I was bringing Trinity to my mom and dad’s for dinner with Melissa and her parents. It would be like sending the poor girl into the roasting pit.
“I don’t think that’s a good idea,” I told her, “and besides, she works Saturday nights.”
“Well if she’s working then you are definitely free,” replied my mother quickly, snatching onto the lifeline I accidently threw her. “I will expect you at six.”
And she hung up before I could say anything else. I threw the phone onto the seat next to me, annoyed. My mom could be so damn manipulative when she wanted to be.
My phone chimed and I glanced over it, hoping to see Trinity’s name, but instead I saw that it was another message from Melissa. Ignoring it, I pulled into the park outside The Bean and got out.
Trinity was behind the counter serving a customer, a big smile stretched across her face as she joked with them. At the sight of her my insides hardened and I paused in the doorway just to watch her.
Her hair was still brushed forward over her forehead hiding her stitches and she wore makeup that for the most part covered the bruises. I would ask her about them, but now that I knew it was her mom and that she was no longer living there I felt a little better. At least I knew she wouldn’t be hurt again.
The customer said something to her and she laughed, the sound dancing across the room to me and making my insides twist. Suddenly an irrational surge of jealousy flooded through me. I wanted to be the one to make her laugh.
I walked up to the counter and waited as she finished up with the customer. She looked over at me and then paused, her eyes going wide and her cheeks turning a very dark shade of pink. I would’ve given anything to know exactly what she was thinking right now. My body hardened at the many possible memories that could arouse such an expression as that.
“Oh,” she said, her mouth forming a perfect o, “hi.”
I grinned and leaned on the counter so I could be closer to her. “Hi.”
There was another guy behind the counter but he was busy making coffee and didn’t pay us any attention. The customer she’d been serving left and there was no one else around. I wondered if I leaned across the counter further would she’d let me kiss her?
“Um,” she picked up a cloth and started wiping the counter which was clean already as she spoke, “did you get out okay then?”
“Yeah,” I said dropping my voice, “I met Mark and his mates.”
She nodded.
“You should have woken me.”
“I had to go to work and you were so—sleepy.”
I grinned, she had been about to say something else but had changed it. I wondered what. Whatever it was it made that stain in her cheeks darken. “Next time. Wake me.”
Her eyes flashed and that color, god love her, got even darker. I stood up, swallowing hard as I struggled to redirect my thoughts. My body was reacting to her and my thoughts and it would only lead to embarrassment for both of us.
“Anyhow,” I began, “what time do you finish? I’ll pick you up.”
She glanced around. “I’m working here until three and then I have tutoring.”
“Tutoring?”
“I teach music,” she explained, “after working here.”
She had two jobs. Plus the band. No wonder she had looked so god damn exhausted last night, and I had done nothing but keep her awake for half the night. I suddenly felt very shit and very
selfish in my need for her.
“Okay.” I frowned. “What time do you finish that?”
Her eyes clouded over. “I’m playing tonight, with the girls. I’m actually pretty busy.”
She was blowing me off. Again. She had to be fucking kidding me? “I’ll be along tonight. We can catch up after the gig.”
She opened her mouth to argue, her eyes finally meeting mine and I stared hard at her. Daring her. She swallowed, the movement slow and drawn out and then licked her lips before she replied. “Okay. I guess I’ll see you at the gig.”
I reached out and grabbed her arm. “And after. You will see me after the gig too.”
Chapter Twelve
Trinity
Priscilla was in a super hyperactive mood today and it had been hard to get her concentrate on music for any length of time. I only had an hour with her and she was bouncing off the walls, talking about a flower girl dress she’d just picked up that day and how she was going to have flowers in her hair and wear sparkly shoes. I listened to her chatter away patiently wondering what it would have been like to have a childhood like hers. One like Luke’s most likely too.
When I left there I went home to my new place at Mark’s. There were a bunch of guys hanging out in the living room smoking dope and drinking beer. I walked straight past them and to my room, closing the door behind me.
I’d known Mark for years—his dad and my mother had had an off and on relationship over the years. On when it suited them both and off when Kent was back in my mother’s life. For a while there they had been very close and Mark, who was a few years older than me, had been spending quite a bit of time over at our house before Kent showed up once more and ruined it. I must have been about thirteen and I actually stayed with Mark and his dad for a few days until Kent went back to his real family. Mark was one of the few people who actually knew what my mother was like, had met and seen her in action.
He’d married Melody only about a year ago and she was nice. She worked in a roadhouse just outside of town and for a while turned a blind eye to his dope smoking and drinking. To the guys hanging out at the house constantly. Then I guess it got too much, a regular customer started paying her more attention and well, she left. Mark sometimes went to work and sometimes didn’t and had a spare room. I had scoured the local papers looking for a place to live but there was nothing both decent and affordable on such short notice. As soon as we did the wedding I would be getting myself a much better place to live.
