Connections (Mists of the Fae Book 5)

by Jaime Marks

He smirked with a shrug. “No, that was simply the added benefit that allowed me to put so much time into tormenting you. It was Demytria’s closeness to Reyana and the knowledge she had of our relationship.” He grimaced staring into nothing a moment, “Reyana was gone but her death haunted me, her absence tortured me, and the pain was unrelenting. It was something I should not have been suffering, but I could not shut it out at that point. It had become overpowering. I know now that it was the Light that remained in my soul, but I had no clue such a thing was even possible then. Even so I could never risk allowing such emotions to surface fully.

  “I had a moment of weakness and went to the lake. It was the only place I ever felt close to her once she was gone and the one place I risked life and limb to go as no one could accompany me. She saw me that day, coming out of the entryway. I could not risk any Shade or Fae knowing I spent any time there as they could never know the weakness in my heart, and to the Shade it is certainly weakness. Perhaps the real reason however was I could see the knowledge and the realization in her eyes as well as a hundred memories of her sitting with Reyana in the meadow while I fussed over them, mainly for Reyana’s amusement. I could never bring her back but being so close to Demytria eased some of the pain of her loss because it brought those memories back to life…made them easier to recall in some small way. So I took her and I convinced myself it was strategic, but it was simply to feel some small measure of what I once had after it had been ripped away. She was a means of feeling alive as was Tatyna before her.”

  Kato studied him as he took it all in. It was as he had suspected since speaking with Demytria, but it was still difficult to hear. “And when you see her now, Cymeryn? When the two of you interact?”

  Cymeryn met him dead in the eye. “There is nothing but remorse for the wrongs I have done her and the comfortable interaction amongst two who have served together well enough to interpret and predict one another’s actions readily. She will always be my progeny in a way, Kato, and I will ever care for her as such but there is nothing more and there never will be. For me there has never been any save Reyana in my heart and having her back, having the bond between us finally complete even without the ritual…just the thought of so much as touching another makes my skin crawl.”

  He nodded with a sigh but said nothing further. He would not make this decision without her and Cymeryn was just going to have play this by his rules if he wanted to appoint her. Stretching out his essence he summoned Demytria and noticed Cymeryn’s brow raise but the Fae merely folded his hands resting his chin against them as they waiting in silence. Kato rose feeling her approach and opened the study door, pulling her into his arms.

  “You were not sleeping were you love?” He smirked knowing full well she had followed his request. He could smell the oils from her bath on her skin and the enticement of it almost made him forget himself, though he kept his carefully reined control.

  “No, I was waiting for you.” She kissed him gently and entered to sit in the chair in front of Cymeryn’s desk as he leaned against the arm of it taking her hand.

  The Fae met his eyes searching for an answer but he was not about to get it. Kato had already decided he would allow this, but it was Cymeryn who needed the closure and the approval to heal his soul for all he had wrought. As much as Kato might have forgiven him, as much as he did not wish to continue seeing the former Shade suffer and even counseled him to try to alleviate some of the strain and guilt, he was not quite ready to absolve him of this. He had suffered for forty years without Demytria and he was not about to let Cymeryn off the hook after merely a few days.

  “Demytria,” Cymeryn began looking her over as if trying to deign how much she knew already. “I need to know if you find it…difficult to be in my presence, to work closely with me as we did when we planned and executed the raid.”

  She gave him that discerning gaze of hers that Kato was finally accustomed to. Getting her back after so many years meant re-acclimating to one another as they discovered who they were after all this time. In some ways it was easy and comfortable, but in others it was very new and at times difficult. Some of her new quirks he rather enjoyed but they had needed to learn to live as mates once more.

  She glanced up at him before speaking as if she wondered how her answer might affect him, but she never hid anything from him and she would not do so now. “No Cymeryn, it isn’t difficult. In many ways it’s comfortable, more so then even when we were Shade. I know you feel I should be repulsed by you or leery of being so close…You both feel that way, but the truth is I haven’t feared you in years and I am more than used to anticipating your moods and actions.” She rose slowly going over to the windows behind his desk and they both watched her as she seemed to consider her words before turning back to them. “The Darkness owned me every bit as much as it did you, Cymeryn. I was as comfortable in it as I am without it. In ways it was easier because there was never any guilt or regret. I won’t deny that as your favored I was attached to you but that was only because my heart was clouded in Darkness. I could not feel what was true. I love Kato and I will always love Kato. I have no impulses or desires towards you and I always knew how you felt for Reyana so I have no fear that you have them towards me.”

  Cymeryn considered her for a moment. “And what about the memories that working together invokes? When you called me Supryn earlier it seemed to have an effect on you?”

  “I won’t deny that, but it’s only because I know all the evil we caused together and only in retrospect. When we were working together and in the field it was like second nature and I actually felt better than I have in weeks. I…I don’t do very well with sitting so idle anymore. I have my patrol with the Guardians but it only covers a small portion of my time and it’s not enough. I was used to managing so much more before and sitting by watching it all can sometimes be…difficult.”

  Kato breathed deeply in surprise as he watched her. They were to have no secrets but she had kept this from him. “Why did you not tell me this, love? I would have seen to it that you were more readily involved.”

  She shrugged becoming the more timid version of herself, the shy female he had once known that had stolen his heart which she sometimes embodied when she felt vulnerable. He watched her as she wrapped her arms around herself shifting her feet nervously. Her hair fell over her shoulder into her face in a dark brown almost black wave that only made her lips a redder shade of rose. He rose and went to her brushing the hair out of her face and gently hooked her chin guiding her to look up at him. He would not allow her to run from whatever it was she was feeling.

  “Demytria?” He met her soft brown eyes and could see uncertainty in them that she rarely had these days. In many ways it was endearing to know that this side of her still existed. “Tell me, my love. You know there is nothing I would not do for you.”

  She sighed. “That’s just it, Kato, it’s not something you can do. Females do not hold positions of authority, well aside from Reyana and other royalty. It’s something I have to earn and prove I can handle and I haven’t really been given the chance to do so. When I make suggestions, unless it’s amongst the rest of you, no Fae listens. They dismiss it. If Grifyn hadn’t have been with me earlier they would never have implemented the changes I suggested.” She pulled away and stared out into the eve again. “To them I am just a female and what would I know? Never mind that I could run circles around them in the training ring, out strategize them at almost every turn, and have indeed kicked half of their asses out on the fronts. Two of the contingent leaders almost died at my hands and they still somehow think I don’t know what I’m doing.”

  Cymeryn chuckled shaking his head and she spun glowering at him. “I don’t find it funny, Cymeryn. You never gave me the full respect I was due as Shade either.”

  He smiled. “No, Demytria I did not and it is probably a good thing or neither of us would be here now and Lazurys would likely have, Reyana.”

  She gaped at him in surprise and Kato almost had to
laugh. It was not much that caught her so off guard that her mouth formed an o and her brow almost met her hairline. “What did you say?”

  “You heard me well enough. Trevyn relied too heavily on the Brood and was easily distracted if you threw a pretty face in front of him. If you had been second in lieu of him, the Fae would have never breached our defenses and you would have seen to it that I was not so easily…distracted.” Cymeryn shrugged. “I am the one who removed you from duty that eve and I will never regret that decision as it brought us both home, but it does not mean that I do not see the truth in it clearly. Even Trevyn knew you out skilled him. It was why he treated you so and kept you under his thumb as much as I allowed.”

  Kato slipped his arms around her waist and she leaned back against him seeming to consider the King’s words. “Why are you telling me this, Cymeryn?”

  “Because it is the truth. You have always been uniquely adept at seeing things defensively that others too easily miss. You know the workings of the Shade as none of the other Guardians do and I trust your judgment in the field more than most. I want you to join the Securine, Demytria.” He paused studying her a moment for her reaction. “I would like to offer you one of the two Head of Securine positions and I want your assessment of the other candidates.”

  Kato could sense the shock and elation that flowed through her. There was no doubt she was well suited for the position and uniquely qualified in ways that no other could be, but it was her joy at the idea that cemented it for him and he met Cymeryn’s eyes and gave him a short nod.

  “Before you answer, either of you,” Cymeryn paused, “I need you to know that I am considering having the positions between the realms shared. Meaning a rotation where both Heads of Securine serve in both realms. I have not settled on it but I need to know with you serving on the Council, Kato, if that would be acceptable. Also you need to realize in accepting this position it effectively will also place you in a role on the Council as well, Demytria. I do not know how well all of this will go over. Appointing her position is going to be interesting enough, but the seat on the Council? I am not sure how the idea will be received and you should be prepared for some difficulties should you accept. As it is there are many that are leery of my own position.”

  She turned to him and he could see the hope in her eyes. Kato hated the adversity this would pit her against, but he also knew that she would be able to handle it and the entirety of the Lucerna Lines would support her. He ran his hand through her hair. “If this is what you wish Demytria, we will make it work. There are duties I will have in both realms regardless. I have no doubt that you have the ability and I am sure you have proven it likewise to your brother.”

  She kissed him and the radiance of her joy and gratitude washed over him. “Thank you,” she whispered before turning back to, Cymeryn. “It would be an honor, Praefect, to serve with you.”

  He smiled slightly. “Good, then we will make the appointment with the others prior to the meeting of the Council elect. Would you be able to stop by in the morn prior to the arrivals to discuss added security measures and the other candidates for appointment? I have it narrowed down to five and there is one I very much need your opinion on prior to discussing it with my brother.”

  Kato smirked studying him as she nodded, “I thought the two of you all but shared one mind these days.”

  He chuckled, “We do, but I am more versed in navigating the power of the mind and when it comes to who I choose to appoint, or not to, it is at my discretion. Marcus has a tendency to insert his opinion rather insistently and as similar as we may be we also value different tactics and traits when it comes to such things. I allow him to weigh in once I am decided to a point and see what he has to offer.”

  Kato shook his head, “Just be careful you do not breed distrust in him, Cymeryn. He struggles with it greatly. Your reconnection is bridging that in some ways but if he begins not to trust even you…”

  “We will be fine, Kato. Marcus knows I do not hide anything of consequence and when he begins to question things I have only to allow our essence to merge to show him he has no reason to be concerned,” Cymeryn replied waving a hand dismissively.

  That may be but he knew how greatly his friend had struggled. It would not take much for him to question how much trust he should place even in his own brother being it was Cymeryn’s betrayal that had wounded him previously. He could only hope that it was something that the two of them could overcome on their own.

  The twins seemed to have found a stride in their lives together that they had never known previously. There was a comfort between them and the connection they shared was profound. In truth if not for the bonds the two of them shared he doubted either of they would have adapted so easily to this life. Marcus had become far more honest and open since his brother’s return and he was a guide and confidant for Cymeryn. It was something they were all learning to trust in.

  Chapter 21

  Star sighed contently as Byryn kissed her before rolling out of bed to start their day. They weren’t meeting the others for breakfast until later when Devyn arrived and they’d been enjoying some time alone. She had never felt more complete, more comfortable in her own skin than she did now…if only she could ignore the feel of the Dark power that was coursing through her. It wasn’t an external force, it was part of her. She didn’t know if Alayne had anything to do with it or not, but she could feel it flowing through her, strengthening her, and it was growing.

  Something Dark and dangerous wrapped around her, caressing her skin and she wasn’t really sure what to make of it. It didn’t seem to bother Byryn and they were so closely connected that he had to feel it every bit as much as she did. If he and Cymeryn weren’t concerned she’d let it be. She knew Byryn knew every one of her thoughts now and there was no reason to stress over things. She had the power to wield all three essences and she wasn’t really used to the strength of any of them yet. It was just gonna take time to adjust and she needed to stop looking for problems that weren’t there.

  Byryn came out from the closet and stood by the bed watching her. “Are you sure you want to be there when I interrogate John? It’s not gonna be pretty, brightness.”

  “I know and yes,” she replied as she got up to get ready. She had her own questions she needed answers to and her own agenda. “I can handle this, Byryn and I know what to expect. I’ve seen what you’re capable of.”

  “I know, baby…” He sighed as he pulled her close. “I just don’t want to scare you when you see that side of me in person, but I agreed to this and I won’t go back on that now. If you change your mind, I won’t think any less of you either.”

  “I promise, I’ll be fine.” She kissed him softly. “I know you, Byryn. There’s nothing you could do that would freak me out.”

  “Alright, then I’m gonna make my rounds before we head down. I’ll be back in a few minutes.” He kissed her pulling her close. “I love you, baby.”

  “Love you too.”

  She got up and got dressed before running a brush thorough her hair. A soft knock sounded at the door and she hesitated, sensing the way Byryn and Cymeryn had taught her, but the Fae weren’t familiar to her. She could feel Ryo in the hall but still, she wanted to know who was there before she opened it. Quietly she stood by the door listening to the voices argue.

  “You could help carry some of this, Talerys, since you insist on following me around,” a soft, feminine voice huffed.

  The male voice that answered was full of arrogance and entitlement. “It is your task to complete, not mine. You need to take responsibility for yourself and stop acting like young.”

  “Whatever, I don’t see why you needed me to do this when you insist on hovering over me like as ass anyway. If you were planning to come from the beginning you could’ve easily done this yourself. You are my Father’s assistant, not I,” she quipped.

  “Watch your tone and your language, Astryn. I do not understand why you insist in speaking in such a fashion. I
t is beneath you and you will learn your place as you will soon find. I see to you because you are mine…even if you refuse to accept it,” he retorted.

  Star rolled her eyes having heard enough of the pompous ass already. She opened the door in time to see an older male Fae reaching up to brush the hair from the female unawakened’s face as she attempted to shrug him away. Her arms were loaded with books and scrolls but she was dressed in formal attire so she couldn’t be a servant. Really she couldn’t be any younger than Star. Her short red hair delicately framed her face bringing out the green in her eyes and there was something about her that caught Star’s attention but she couldn’t quite place it.

  The male dropped his hand immediately when he saw her and bowed respectfully while the girl struggled to do so with the heavy load in her arms. Star set the brush aside and grabbed some of the scrolls off the top to ease some of the burden.

  “Can I help you?”

  “Sorry to disturb you, Princess. My name is Astryn a Alyric. My Father, Head Scholar Alyric a Alyrion, asked that these materials be brought to you.”

  “Of course, come in and we’ll get them sorted,” she offered the girl a smile stepping back to let her in. When the male attempted to follow Star raised a hand halting him before Ryo even had a chance to intercede. “I’m sorry but…who are you?”

  “I am Talerys a Taleryn, my lady. Assistant to Head Scholar Alyric,” he offered smugly as if she should already know him.

  “Regardless of who you are, it’s a bit improper of you to enter my chambers without my mate present, don’t you think?” She arched a brow watching his reaction as his eyes narrowed. “I think Astryn and I can manage on our own. It doesn’t take two scholars to deliver materials. You’re dismissed.”

  “My lady, I am the Lady Astryn’s escort. It is my responsibility to ensure she remains out of trouble.”

  “As you can see we’re well guarded here and I’m sure Astryn can manage, otherwise she wouldn’t have been given this task. I’ll see to it that she makes it back to her quarters when we’re done.”