Escaping the Past (Wester Farms)

by Falkner, Tammy

  “He knew it, dear,” was her only response to his comment. She grinned broadly at him and took his chin in her hand. She shook his chin gently. “But you were mine. From the day that you were born, you were mine. I counted your fingers and toes. I looked into your eyes and I knew you were mine. You were the best baby. A fabulous child. But you were not made to be a rancher.”

  “But I like ranching,” he declared petulantly.

  “But you love medicine.”

  “I’ve had a lot of fun here these last few weeks. I can’t believe how much John has grown.”

  “That one will always be a rancher and will love every minute of it.”

  “And Sadie and Jeb will never change, will they?”

  “God, I hope not!” They both laughed. “And Lou? What do you think of her, son?”

  “I think she’s wonderful.”

  “And?” Her eyebrows lifted.

  “And what? She’s fabulous. She’s terrific. She’s…Lou. Jesus. I don’t know what to say about her.”

  “You have to take her just like she is. Because she doesn’t hide anything, Brody.”

  “I’m not taking her at all, Mom. Good grief.”

  “Okay!” She held her hands up in mock surrender. “Just remember what I say. Everything doesn’t fit into a neat and tidy box. Some things are complicated. And they are supposed to be that way.”

  “Point taken,” he said. “I love you.”

  “Almost as much as I love you. Now, scoot. Go and help Lou finish picking the flowers. Send Lola back up here. Then we’ll put the flowers on the grave and have some lunch by the pond.”

  “Are you getting tired?”

  “No. I’ll let you know when I am. Run along. I want a minute alone, please.”

  “Okay.” He kissed her on the forehead and started to walk toward Lou who was still gathering flowers by the pond. He motioned to Lola that she should go back up and sit with his mother while he walked over to Lou.

  “Are you doing all right?” she asked quietly.

  “Yeah. But we had better get home before too long. She looks a little tired.”

  “I’m ready when you are,” Lou replied and put the bouquet of wildflowers in his hand with a smile.

  They turned to walk back to where Lola and Mrs. Wester waited at the gravesite. Then they heard Lola scream. “Dr. Wester! You had better come quick!”

  Brody and Lou both broke into a fast run and reached her at the same time. She appeared to be sleeping, her head hanging to one side, eyes closed, and a slight smile on her face. Brody touched her lightly on the shoulder but she did not stir. He grabbed Lola’s stethoscope from where it rested around her neck and listened to his mother’s heart.

  He stood up and turned to grab Lou in a tight embrace. He buried his face in her hair and he pulled her close to him. “She’s gone,” he whispered in her ear, his voice cracking only slightly as he said it.

  ****

  The next twenty-four hours rushed by like a fast-moving wave. Time and fatigue washed over them all as they prepared for the funeral and dealt with the emotions flying around like kites caught in a summer storm.

  Lou stood in her bedroom, dressing for family night at the funeral home when the reality of the situation finally hit her. Mrs. Wester was gone. She had given Lou opportunities and chances for a good life but she had also done more than that. She gave Lou a role model, someone she could look up to. She gave her something to aspire to be. And she was gone.

  Lou tucked her black silk blouse into her black skirt and slid on her dress shoes. She turned to open her door to walk out of the room and the emotions slapped her in the face.

  She couldn’t go through the door but returned and sat down on the edge of the bed, burying her face in her hands, letting the tears flow freely. She cried until there were no tears left. She reached for a tissue to dry her eyes and felt a gentle tug on her sleeve.

  “Are you okay, Mommy?” a little voice asked quietly, similar brown eyes staring into her own.

  Lou pulled Sarah into a clumsy embrace, clutching the child against her. She sniffed loudly and the tears started to fall again. Lou held Sarah against her until the child started to squirm.

  “Sadie says God calls some people up to heaven, Mommy. Is that where you think Mrs. Wester is?”

  Lou smiled through her tears and dried her eyes once more. She took a deep breath.

  “I don’t just think it, Sarah, I know it.”

  “But, didn’t God know we wanted her to stay here with us?”

  “Oh, I’m sure He knew how much we all wanted her to stay, but He has to do things on His own schedule and not on ours.”

  “Do you think she’s happy in heaven, Mommy?”

  “I do think she’s happy and healthy in heaven, Sarah. She’s looking down on us all, watching us.”

  “Well, then, Mommy, what do you think she would say about all this crying you’re doing? I think she would laugh at you and tell you how silly you’re being. What do you think?” Sarah asked with a cheeky grin.

  Lou laughed through her tears. “I think you are probably right, Sarah.” She took Sarah’s hand in her own. “Let’s go to the funeral home and make her proud of us. Shall we?”

  Lou and Sarah walked hand in hand into the kitchen where Jeb, Sadie, John and Brody were all waiting. Brody rose from his chair at the table when he saw her approach. She was sure he could still see the remnants of her tears as he asked “Are you okay?”

  “I’m as okay as I’m going to be today, I think.” She sniffed loudly.

  “Everyone ready to go?” Jeb asked loudly. All eyes in the room swung his way. Five pairs of shoulders straightened as they steeled themselves and they all walked outside. Jeb and Sadie turned to go to Jeb’s truck. Brody’s hand on Jeb’s shoulder stopped him.

  “Mom would want you to ride in the family car. She wouldn’t have it any other way.”

  “If you say so,” Jeb replied, nodding slightly. He helped Sadie into the back seat and then climbed in himself. Lou slid into the center row and moved to sit against the far window. Sarah sat in the middle. Brody sat on the other side. John sat up front next to the driver. Lou buckled Sarah in to the middle seat and rested her arm along the back. Brody lifted his arm to the back of the seat as well. Her eyes caught his when his fingers slid between her own. She squeezed his hand gently and smiled softly at him.

  Sadie squeezed Jeb’s thigh in the backseat. He patted her hand in return.

  Brody and John formed the receiving line at the funeral home, ready to greet the visitors. Sadie and Jeb played host and hostess, shaking hands and giving teary hugs to friends and family. Sarah held on to Sadie’s dress. Lou turned to mingle with the crowd, not sure what to do with herself.

  She felt Brody’s arm slip around her waist. He whispered in her ear, “Come and stand by me?” His hand slid from around her waist and trailed down her arm. He lightly tugged her hand, urging her to walk with him.

  She protested, “But I’m not family.”

  “You were to her and you are to me. Please?” She nodded slightly and allowed herself to be placed between Brody and John. He smiled the unabashed smile of a ten-year-old. “I have to admit I need someone to tell me who all these people are. It’s been more than ten years since I have seen most of them.”

  Friends, family, and well-wishers all came to pay their respects to the late Mrs. Wester. They sobbed, they laughed and they all spoke of what a fine woman she was. She had numerous friends and acquaintances from the charities she supported and families from the neighboring farms all visited. Lou got choked up when friends spoke of how much they would miss her, and her constant laugh and quick wit. Brody had his cheeks pinched by the old dowagers and even had his bottom pinched by an old friend from school.

  Heat crept up her cheeks as Brody’s eyes caught hers. He knew must have known she had seen the pinch. After the visitor had passed, he whispered, “Do you know who that was?”

  “Melinda Campbell from C&C Farm
s. They live down the road from us,” she nearly growled.

  “That’s little Millie? No way!” He cast an appreciative glance in Melinda’s direction. “She sure has filled out. Last time I saw her, she was still in braces.” He glanced over in her direction again.

  “I guess she’s cute if you like buck teeth and a wide behind,” Lou mumbled.

  “What did you say?” Brody asked.

  “Nothing.” She planted a fake smile on her face.

  Just then, a blond bombshell strode up, legs up to her ears. Brody’s grin got even wider as he reached to embrace her. “Now this is a face I remember! How are you, Liz?”

  “Doing fine, Brody. I’m so sorry to hear about your mom.” His hand clasped hers.

  “Me too, but we all know she’s in a better place,” Brody replied.

  “Are you staying in town for a while? If so, maybe we can go out for a drink for old times’ sake?” the leggy blonde wanted to know. She reached into her purse and retrieved a business card. She pressed it into his hand. Lou read the type, “Elizabeth Patton, Party Planner Extraordinaire,” over his arm before he tucked it in his pocket.

  “No. I actually am going back home a few days after the funeral. I’ll try not to stay away so long next time so I can take you up on that drink offer.” He leaned and whispered something in her ear, causing her to twitter nervously. She kissed his cheek and moved away, throwing, “Save that ‘til the next time I see you,” over her shoulder.

  Lou stepped away from Brody, taking herself out of the receiving line.

  “Where are you going?” Brody called to her retreating back.

  She kept walking. She was irritated. She was angry. She was jealous! She decided some fresh air would do her good, so she went outside to where Sarah was playing with some of the neighborhood children on the small playground beside the funeral home. Sadie had her watchful eye on the child but, she was deeply engrossed in conversation with one of the parents.

  Sarah’s black dress was dusty with dry dirt and leaves clung to her hair. “How do you manage to get dirty so quickly, young lady?”

  “It’s easy, Mommy.” She grinned up at Lou.

  “Are you having fun?”

  “Yeah,” she replied. Then paused, a serious look on her face. “Is it okay to have fun with Mrs. Wester going to heaven and all?”

  Lou took a deep breath and knelt down to Sarah’s level. “What do you think Mrs. Wester would want? Would she want you to stop playing? Would she want you to be sad?”

  Sarah’s worried frown was replaced with a grin. “She would never want that!”

  “I don’t think so, either,” replied Lou. She stood, stretched, and turned to go back into the funeral home.

  Sarah called out, “Oh, Mommy!” Lou turned to her. “A man told me to give this to you.” She held a plain paper envelope in her hand. Lou reached out and took it in her own, then walked straight inside to the bathroom. She stood by the counter and opened the letter, thinking it must be from a friend of the family.

  A photo fell into her hand of her mother and a teenage Lou, standing side by side.

  What she read took her breath.

  Mary Lou,

  You and I have an important matter to discuss. You still have something I need to get from you. Don’t make me come and get it. You have one week and then I’m coming to get what you owe.

  Wes

  Lou took a deep breath, splashed some water on her face in an attempt to wash away the worry lines. She dried her face gently and placed the letter and photo in the pocket of her skirt. She lifted her shoulders, steeled herself and rejoined the crowd. They had thinned out considerably. The viewing was almost over and most of the family and friends had paid their respects. Small groups of people still milled about. Night was falling, so Sadie stood inside with Sarah. Lou took a deep breath. At least she was safe. For the next week, she was safe.

  Brody walked over to Lou, his eyebrows scrunched together. “Where did you run off to?”

  “Do you really want me to tell you about my trip to the ladies’ room?” she flipped back at him.

  “Is something wrong?”

  She sighed. If you only knew. “No. Nothing’s wrong. I’m just tired, I guess.” She rubbed her eyes with the curve of her hand.

  “You ready to go home? It’s been a long day,” Brody asked.

  “Yeah. I am ready. You?”

  He extended his arm, and she only hesitated a moment before wrapping her hand through the crook of it. She let him lend her some emotional support as well as physical strength. She motioned to Sarah that it was time to go, and the little girl came running.

  Jeb and Sadie met them at the car. The ride home was quiet. All the occupants of the car were pensive and tired. Sarah fell asleep with her head on Lou’s lap.

  When they stopped at home, Lou got out of the car and bent to pick Sarah up. Brody brushed her out of the way and scooped the child up himself. She had to admit she liked the way Sarah tucked her head into his neck and held on tightly.

  They walked through the kitchen and he grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge. He kissed Sadie on the forehead and said, “Night, Jeb.” He nodded in John’s direction. “John.”

  “Night,” they all responded.

  Lou followed him up the stairs and she undressed Sarah, sliding her nightgown on without even waking her. Brody pulled the covers over her. Lou tugged the door shut that adjoined the two rooms.

  He followed Lou into her own room.“Thanks for all the help tonight.”

  “You didn’t need my help. You’re just saying that to make me feel like I was needed.”

  “I need you,” he breathed at her.

  Her breath caught in her throat. She licked her lips.

  “Why do you need me?” she asked quietly.

  “Because my mother just died.” He rubbed both eyes with his fists and moaned. “I am so tired. I don’t even think I’m fit for company.”

  “You going to bed?” Lou asked quietly. Then her gaze grew more serious. “Your mother did just die. You haven’t had time to deal with it yet so maybe some rest will help.” She patted his arm.

  “I don’t think I could sleep if I wanted to. I think I’m going to go down to the bar in the study and get a bottle of Jack Daniels, and get stinking drunk all by myself. Maybe then I’ll just pass out and not feel this pain anymore.” He took her hand and held it over his heart. “All those years, I guess I just assumed she would always be here for me.”

  “She was and still is, Brody. You take her strength with you in all that you do.”She removed her hand from over his heart and gave him a gentle shove toward the door. “Go to bed, Brody. You’ll feel better tomorrow if you get some rest.”

  He surprised her by kissing her on the cheek. “’Night, Lou.”

  “’Night,” she responded.

  Brody walked out of her room and Lou closed the door behind him. She took off her clothes and walked into the bathroom, stepping beneath the spray of the shower. The heat pounded the tension from her body and eased the strained muscles of her shoulders and back. She came out of the shower feeling like some of the stress of the day had been washed down the drain. She brushed through her wet locks with a wide-toothed comb and then dressed in a tank top and long pajama pants.

  Lou opened the screen door and flopped down in the rocker outside her room, hanging her hair over the back of the chair to dry. She absently chewed her fingernails.

  Then she heard a sound coming from the shadows. Then she heard it again. The catch of someone’s breath? The rocker squeaked and then there was a sniffle, followed by someone loudly blowing his nose.

  “Brody?” The squeaking rocker stopped. “Brody? Is that you?”

  A muffled voice called back. “Yeah. It’s me.”

  “Are you okay?” she asked nervously.

  “I’m on my way to being okay.”

  “What’s that supposed to mean?”

  “Nothing, Lou,” he sighed. “Just go to bed.”
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  She got up slowly and walked across the porch on bare feet. She could see him sitting in the shadows, tears pouring down his face, a full glass in his hand.

  “What are you doing?” she asked quietly.

  “Getting stinking drunk, just like I told you I was going to do.”

  “How much have you had so far?”

  “Just one glass as of this moment.” He extended the full glass in her direction. “This one is number two.” He wiped his face with a handkerchief.

  “Drunk yet?”