Other People's Bodies

by Amy Cross

  "I don't know what you're talking about," I stammer, glancing briefly over to the far side of the room, where Victor Bannister was watching from his wheelchair. Rachel's also in the room, loitering by the door. "Is something wrong?" I ask, turning back to Edward.

  "I'd like you to tell me," he continues. "This is your last chance, Ms. Kingston. If there's something you'd like to get off your chest, now's the time. I think it'd be a lot better for you conscience and for your future if you owned up. At this stage in the game, I think the least you owe me is a little honesty".

  "I have no idea what you're talking about," I say firmly, becoming increasingly aware of the possibility that I might burst into tears at any moment. The fury in Edward's eyes is extremely intimidating, filled with the power of barely restrained anger, and I'm starting to feel as if I'm one wrong move away from being bent over his knee and spanked. Less than an hour ago, Edward seemed grateful to me for all my help, and now it's as if he's completely switched and started to hate me. "If you can just tell me -"

  "So this is all a mystery to you?" Edward asks, leaning back in his chair, his eyes ablaze with the studied anger of a man who's contemplating his vengeance. "As far as you're concerned, you've done nothing wrong and I'm overreacting? You think I'd haul you in here without being sure of my facts?"

  "I -"

  "Don't treat me like an idiot," he says firmly.

  "I don't -" I start to say, before taking a deep breath and trying to keep from panicking. "I don't know what it is that you think I've done," I say eventually, aware that my voice sounds a lot more fragile than usual. "If you could just tell me. If it's something to do with what happened earlier -"

  "Like you don't know!" Edward replies harshly.

  "I don't!" I say, raising my voice. "I swear to God, I don't know why you're so angry at me!"

  "Liar," Edward says firmly.

  "I don't even know -"

  "Forget it," he continues, turning to Rachel. "I need to talk to Ms. Kingston in private. Rachel, I'd like you to take my father for a little walk. I'd rather he's not here while I talk to Ms. Kingston. All things considered, I think this is something that should be done in a more circumspect and private setting".

  For the first time since I met him, Victor seems to stir a little. His mouth opens and he lets out a grunt, and he seems to be more agitated than usual. It's clear that he isn't happy with Edward's decision to send him out of the room, even as Rachel walks over and grabs the handles at the back of his chair.

  "Please, father," Edward says, "there's no need for you to be here all the time. I need to speak to Ms. Kingston one-on-one and find out why she'd do something like this. Staff disciplinary matters are not a spectator sport". He turns to Rachel. "Take him outside, please. I'm not in the mood to argue".

  I stand in the middle of the room and wait until Rachel and Victor have left. Almost trembling with fear, I feel as if I'm about to break. So far, my first day at the Heights is turning into a disaster, and I'm starting to worry that I'm going to be blamed for the rats in the pipes. Frankly, it feels as if I've been plunged into the middle of some kind of manic nightmare, and there's a part of me that actually welcomes the possibility of hitting the road. I certainly don't think I can handle much more of this chaos.

  "Shut the door, please," Edward says.

  "I don't know -"

  "Shut the door!"

  Doing as I'm told, I hurry across the room and push the door shut, before making my way back toward Edward's desk. I feel as if I'm on the brink of losing control, but I keep telling myself that it's vitally important to not get angry. In situations like these, I have a tendency to start shouting and showing my frustration, but right now I know I have to keep a lid on my true emotions. I can cry and scream later, in private, but I have to hold it together while I'm standing here. I fell apart in front of a man once before. I won't do it again.

  "I'm sorry about all of that," Edward says eventually, his voice sounding notably calmer. "I'm afraid it was necessary for people to believe that I was angry at you. I trust that you didn't take it too seriously?"

  I stare at him.

  "I'm afraid you've been set up," he continues. "Someone wanted me to believe that you were responsible for the little stunt that took place earlier. Naturally, I don't suspect you for a moment. I pride myself on being able to read people, Ms. Kingston, and I'm confident that you don't have a malicious bone in your body. Besides, why would you care about Elizabeth? You're the one person who never met her".

  "So..." I pause. "So who did it?" I ask.

  "I believe the venom came from much closer to home," he replies, with a hint of a smile. "It's no coincidence, I'm sure, that this happened just after my brother left for Afghanistan. Like everyone else around here, he's convinced that I'm responsible for what happened to Elizabeth. I'm sure he felt it necessary to leave me a message before he departed. It's easier for the members of my family to all think that Elizabeth was murdered or abducted. None of them want to face the truth, which is that she got sick of this whole place and ran away. She got sick of us all and, for that, we must all share the blame".

  "You really think that's what happened?" I ask. "You think she ran away?"

  He nods. "I'm certain of it. We drove her to the brink of madness, but she left before we could push her over the edge. Wherever she is, I hope she's able to recover and get on with her life". He pauses for a moment, as if he's lost in thought. "I owe you an apology," he continues eventually. "Your first day here at the Heights has been one long series of dramatic events. I hope you're not feeling too unwelcome. If it's any help, I've spoken to Cole and told him that your drinks this evening are on the house. I'd also like to discuss some matters over dinner one night, if that's okay with you? Not tonight, of course, but perhaps some time in the week".

  "Sure," I say, still finding it hard to get my head around all the madness. "Of course". Right now, however, I'm not even sure I'll be staying. It seems as if this whole place is conspiring to turn me into a nervous wreck, and the last thing I need is to have free drinks lined up for me. The more I think about it, the more I realize I should probably turn and run.

  "Well," Edward continues, looking a little uncomfortable, "I'd just like to conclude by saying that I'm very impressed by your work so far. I appreciate that things haven't gone smoothly today, but I think your plan to modernize the hotel might just be the kind of thing to turn the whole business around. In fact, I'd like you to prepare a more wide-ranging report looking into some other ideas. The sky's the limit, Ms. Kingston. Let's hope that, while the work's being carried out, no more nasty surprises turn up".

  I nod.

  "You'd better get back to whatever you were doing," Edward says. "I'm afraid I've got to spend the afternoon going over some figures and working out where to find the money for your proposals. Don't worry, though. You've got my full support, and I'm confident that my family won't try any more stunts for a while. I'm sure my father will tell Luke all about today's incidents, and Luke will assume that he's made his point". He pauses. "Things are a little stressed around here at the moment. With my brother having shipped out to Afghanistan, the whole family's on edge".

  "Have you heard from him?" I ask.

  Edward shakes his head. "He's probably there already. It says something about a family, doesn't it, when someone would rather go and risk his life in a war-zone, than stay at home?"

  "I'll get back to work," I say, turning and heading to the door. At the last moment, however, I glance back at Edward and find myself feeling a little sympathy for him. After all, he seems to be under siege thanks to his family, I I can't help wondering how he lets off steam. "If you ever need to talk about anything," she say cautiously, "I'm a good listener".

  He stares blankly at me for a moment, as if the idea is shocking. "I'm sure I'll be fine," he mutters eventually. "Thank you, all the same".

  "I'll get back to work," Laura say, turning and heading to the door. As soon as I'm out in the corrid
or, however, I have to stop so I can pull myself together. I came to the Heights because I wanted to get my head straight, but so far this place is threatening to tear me apart. If I was a stronger person, maybe I could handle the insanity around here. The old Laura would have been right at home, lapping up all the madness, but the new Laura is more fragile, and needs a more peaceful environment. Still, I can't quit, not yet. I have to stick to this job, deal with the madness, and focus on staying sane. I can't let the Heights drag me down.

  Elizabeth

  Five years ago

  "You were talking to Edward quite a lot tonight," Luke says, as we wander back toward our room. It's late, and all I want to do is climb into bed and go to sleep. Not only have I had too many glasses of champagne, but the day has also been emotionally draining. I can barely even think right now.

  "Not really," I reply. "I just wanted to ask him about Juliet. Do you think she's okay?"

  "Juliet?" He stops as we reach the door, and it takes him a moment to find the key in his pocket. "She's fine. She's just a kid".

  "Yeah, but -"

  "She and Edward are basically the same," he continues, finally getting the door open. "She's got that whole stiffness, you know what I mean? She's gonna grow up and be his clone, so why worry about it?"

  "I don't think she's happy," I say as we enter the room. "I think she's dreading going back to school".

  "She'll learn," he replies, kicking the door shut before turning and grabbing me by the waist. "There's something you need to know about this family. Everyone kind of gets on with their own shit. We don't really share our emotions". Leaning closer, he kisses me delicately on the lips. "Anyway. Soon you'll be Mrs. Luke Bannister. Tell me, do you fancy a quick roll in the sheets" He kisses the side of my neck. "We've never done it drunk before".

  Laura

  Today

  "Going somewhere?" Cole asks.

  "Jesus!" I shout, spinning around to face him. I've been so busy shoving clothes back into my suitcase, I hadn't realized that I was being watched. "I'm just..." I look down at the suitcase and realize that there's no point pretending. I'd hoped to slip away unnoticed, but apparently fate isn't going to let her be so lucky. "I'm just getting out of here," I say finally, admitting defeat.

  "For good?"

  "Well, duh! I mean, wouldn't you?" I grab some more clothes, while consciously trying to seem upbeat and happy about the decision.

  "Bad first day?"

  "Bad?" I pause, feeling as if I could scream. "I can't handle this place," I say eventually, as I finish packing my meager belongings into the suitcase. I figure it doesn't matter if Cole sees that I'm tired and down; after all, I'm not planning to keep in touch once I've hit the road. "You were right," I say after a moment. "It's crazy around here. I mean, I can handle a challenge, but whatever's going on here, it's like the whole place is insane. I can't deal with it".

  "It is insane," Cole agrees. "What tipped you off? The warring family? The missing woman? The rats in the piping?"

  "The human teeth and eyeballs?"

  "The what?"

  "Never mind".

  "We should compare notes some time," Cole continues. "Two heads are better than one, right?" He waits for a reply, but I'm not in the mood to make small-talk. "So what's really got you running?"

  "Being blamed for things," I say, zipping my suitcase closed. "I can handle anything, but not personal attacks". I pause, realizing that once again I'm close to tears. "I can't do this without..." I pause again. What I was going to say was that I can't do this without a drink, but of course I don't want to admit to Cole that I have a problem with alcohol. I feel as if I'm on the verge of another nervous breakdown, and if that's the case, I'm damn well not going to do it in front of anyone else. Instead, I'll crawl away and curl up alone and wait for things to pass. "I'm not cut out for this job," I say eventually. "They need someone who can handle the madness".

  "No-one can handle the madness around here," Cole replies. "That's why it just keeps on going".

  "How do you do it?" I ask.

  "I keep out of the way. I watch, but I don't say much. Besides, I'm the barman. Everyone thinks they can talk to me. I'm useful to them, so they natter away from time to time, after they've had a few drinks, but mostly they just ignore me. Except Edward, of course. He never says a damn thing to anyone. That guy's a closed book, which is probably just as well. I'd hate to see what might come out if he ever opened up".

  "I'm glad you can deal with it," I say, speaking slowly and calmly in an attempt to fend off the inevitable tears. "I can't. Not when I'm being accused of doing all these awful things. I know Edward just did it for show, but still..."

  "He blamed you for the rats?"

  "Just for show. He thinks his brother was responsible".

  "That sounds about right," Cole replies. "It all comes back to those two in the end. I told you the Bannisters were fucked up, didn't I? They were a mess before Elizabeth ever came here, and now they're just..." He pauses for a moment. "Laura, what the hell are you doing?"

  Standing by my suitcase, I have my chin pressed against my chest. It's my attempt to make sure I don't cry, but it has the unfortunate side-effect of making me look ridiculous.

  "If you walk out of here," Cole continues, "where will you go?"

  "Who cares?" I ask.

  "I care," he replies.

  Taking a deep breath, I force myself to stay back. The old Laura would have made a move right now. She'd ignore the fact that she barely knows him; she wouldn't give a damn about the fact that she'd seem like a slut; she'd just throw herself at Cole for some casual sex, despite the fact that it'd be deeply unprofessional and, more to the point, ignoring the fact that the guy is pretty obviously in love with the missing Elizabeth Bannister. Yes, the old Laura would have done all those things, and then she'd have gone to the bar and drowned her embarrassment. Although I've grown tired of the old Laura, I've got to admit that she had a lot more fun. Those days, however, are over. I've changed.

  "Sorry," Cole says after a moment, "that probably sounded weird, but I like you. I could use a sane friend around here. Plus there's the fact that you're my boss, which means I can manipulate you and get a pay rise some time soon".

  "You think?" I reply.

  "That's the plan".

  I smile, and it's the first smile today that wasn't planned or staged; it's just an honest smile, and it feels good.

  "If you stay," Cole continues, "I'll fill you in properly on how things work around here. I kinda feel like you need a 101 course in the Bannisters and their insanity. Once you know what to expect, it'll be a lot easier to deal with them". He pauses, as if he's waiting for me to change my mind and agree to stick around. "This might be none of my business," he says finally, "and feel free to smack me down if I'm out of line, but I can't help feeling that you're not the kind of person who likes to quit. I also don't think you have anywhere else to go".

  "What makes you think that?" I ask, shocked that he could have guessed so much. I thought I'd been keeping all my cards close to my chest.

  "Because otherwise you wouldn't be standing there, trying to decide what to do. You'd have already shot out the door and raced to your car". He waits for an answer. "Come on. Stay. It's really not so bad. I'll make you a deal. Spend five years here, and if at the end of it all you find that your sanity has been crushed and you've become a nervous wreck, I'll admit I'm wrong".

  I stare at him for a moment. "Sure," I say eventually, even though it's a lie.

  "You'll stay?"

  I nod.

  "Great. I should get back to the bar, but do you want to swing by later so I can fill you in on the Bannisters' family history?"

  "Sounds good," I reply noncommittally.

  "I'll hold you to it," he says as he turns to walk away. "Don't go running out on me".

  Left standing alone in her room, I try to ignore the tightening sensation in my chest. It's as if someone is slowly tying a knot in my heart, and unfortunately it
's a feeling I know only too well. I used to have a way to kill the feeling, of course, but my usual defense mechanism - a gallon of vodka - is suddenly off the table, and now I feel as if I've been caught without my armor. I could handle the insane Bannister family, just about, and I could definitely handle the job; what I can't handle, however, is the thought that I might be falling for another guy. That, more than anything else, is definitely not allowed. In fact, it's the one thing that terrified her.

  So I have to go.

  Before her brain can realize what's happening, before rational thought can break through and challenge my instincts, I do what I always do when things get too much.

  I run.

  Grabbing my suitcase, I race as fast as possible out into the corridor, then out through a back door and around to the car park. Forcing myself not to look back as I bolt to the car, I fumble with my keys for a moment and finally I get the door open and climb inside. In my panic, I feel as if the Devil himself is bearing down on me. As soon as I've got the ignition started, I slam my foot on the accelerator and set off, tires squealing as I race through the car park and out onto the road. There's only one long and winding road that leads from the Heights to the motorway, like an umbilical cord back to the real world.

  Granted, the real world isn't very enticing right now. When I originally found the Heights, I felt as if I was escaping to an entirely separate place, and I managed to persuade myself that I could ignore the past and become a new, improved version of myself. That plan, however, has gone horribly wrong; I've found, instead, that I can't deal with the insanity of the Heights. Perhaps I might once have been able to accept the unpredictability of Edward Bannister and the madness of the rest of his family, but I feel as if I can't cope, not when I'm unable to indulge in my two favorite past-times: drinking and sex. I need a softer challenge, and I need more time to prepare. Coming to the Heights was a mistake, but at least it's not too late to put things right.