We mourned our dead. We felt the sacrifices in every mirror we glanced in, felt the scars as if the wounds had sprung fresh blood yesterday. We put faith in each other and the passing of time. But time tricks you, a sorcerer in itself, a trickster; it makes you believe you are healed from torments and traumas past, lives lost and hauntings. Homes destroyed by fire, best friends that sacrificed their own lives just so you could keep yours. Family wounded inside and out. But at any given moment, when you are the least guarded, the cracks bear themselves and the agony leaks out, as if not one second has passed since the God-awful day when your heart broke so horribly for the first time.
Sorrow was beautiful and wretched at the same time. Sorrow was a thief, and it stole life with youth, writing its lines as scars, deeply embedding themselves in frowns and foreheads.
It could take five minutes to look ten years older.
For us, for now, we had to go on. We had lives to live with the ones dearest to us before we could one day meet the ones lost again. We lived with hope and prayers to rebuild, to maintain, and to heal. We had to honour the memory of everything we’d lived through, to be grateful we had survived by living just and meaningful lives.
Our hearts were mending like stitches in time. Like the fabric of life, we were growing, becoming, finding our places, and living there in that sacred thread riding the crescent of a new moon. We would find it and become it; we would own it one day. Healing was an absolute must. When I looked at Tracey and Joel’s love, so strong and gracious to each other through Joel’s healing, when I watched Duke and Theo up to their old tricks, when I listened to Earth just to hear what she had to say, I knew we would overcome it all. When I watched Betty with her new babe, growing and embracing her world, when I listened to Reg and Piper bicker, when I laid back in bed each night, resting in Jasper’s strong arms, I knew it would all be okay. Life was all a circle; it was all okay, and it would be better than okay.
We would be whole again; injuries suffered would never be in vain. We had found our purity, our honesty, and our power, and we could only ever find that in each other—in family.
And sure as shit, I would not forget everything I had learned.
So many people had become so dear to me. Beth, the trio, and even my family I looked at in a whole new light. Their faces were imprinted on my heart forever. Their messages I carried there and kept safe.
Summer was slowly receding, suggested by early sunsets and the breeze that returned from the north. I could faintly hear it calling to those transient in nature that follow the seasons throughout the earth. I grew to love those quiet moments when I stood in the garden with the grass between my toes and listened to the trees. I took advantage of every peaceful moment I could acquire. That was when I could really hear Earth and all of my elements, and my soul was able to speak.
Sometimes, out in the gardens where so much had been lost but so much had been won, if I listened too closely to Earth and her guarded messages, I would hear him in the distance. I knew Lou still existed out there somewhere, somehow, on some other ethereal plane. I could still faintly feel his presence, especially when I would be out here in this place where he had finally met his demise. Unsure if he was trapped or too attached to this spot, I would try to explore that, but then I would feel him grow stronger. Like all humans give spirits energy by thoughts or prayer, I was feeding him again, just from the energy of my own curiosity.
God, could I just learn to mind my own business?
This is when I would close my eyes and concentrate on a slamming door to shut him out. I would softly chant, “I wish you well, but I wish you far, far away from me.”
If he was still out there, let him be. He couldn’t hurt us anymore. He would one day lose interest, and when all the energy left him, he would go back fully to whatever hell he had come from.
Maybe he was waiting for the next Lightning Witch.
That would be a long wait. And I had time. I would write out our story. All of it. The brilliant, the nasty, the terrifying; I would write it all down so the next Lightning Witch would know right away. Before any of this repeated itself in another witch’s life.
When I was satisfied I couldn’t feel him anymore, I would go back inside the house with no residue of his attempts on my person or my energy whatsoever.
It was true that idle time was the devil’s playground.
Sometimes, out there, I could also hear a familiar bark that felt close but sounded far away.
I could still feel Hunter, always and forever at my side. Sometimes I would feel his fur brush my bare leg or hear his growl when he worried for me. God, how I missed him. I wished he could be here to see the puppy grow and share a T-bone steak with me. At those moments, when he made himself known to me, I took small comfort that he was still here.
Life gradually went back to some semblance of normal, or better than. I recovered fully from my health issues. I hadn’t had a migraine in two months. We burned essential oils constantly, to the extreme pleasure of Roomie, who really could only savour in smells and light. He let us know by bobbing around constantly in his orbed form across the ceilings and walls.
We regained our strength in life and our marriage. Settled back into our old routines, with a few exciting changes. We made love almost every night now, with nothing weighing on our minds, especially pregnancy. We held no desired outcomes. We would only cherish our moments together.
In the meantime, Tracey and I were filling up our spare time planning her wedding to Joel. He had asked her after he’d regained his strength from the great battle. Joel would not be walking down the aisle, but at least he would be alive to marry his girl. Tracey had agreed with tears in her eyes. My strong Tracey could melt like chocolate in the sun when her heart was touched. She was, however, semi-difficult to get to decide on what arrangements she would like for her summer wedding, but I warned her to get moving before, to her dismay, some input from Piper would come shortly.
We also planned our next trip, which would be Italy and Paris this time. We would leave before November and end up arriving home before Christmas, when we needed to be back in our respective shops for the busy season. I found myself longing for the shops of Paris and longing to walk the cobblestones throughout the Vatican City. Most of all, I longed for distance from this place for a short while with just Jasper and me.
We had so much to look forward to every single day. Our life was so amazing. Gratitude should always be our attitude, as Reg often said. And she was right.
Jasper thought I should give it some more time, but I was ready to go back to work. I loved being at home, but I needed to pay some attention to my other baby, who I’m sure had missed me as much as I had missed her.
It was hard to leave our pack, even if it was to rejoin the land of the living. I thanked God for Hayden, who was solely responsible for all of us healing so well. The puppy was growing and getting stronger. She was quite the handful, however. Almost like a Tasmanian devil at times, running and hopping around in a flurry of fur and excitement. She got into everything; we were constantly catching her in midair as she jumped before she looked and pulling all sorts of things out of her mouth, from wood to charcoal to jewelry to sometimes tissue after she made it look like it had snowed in the house. But we all adored her endlessly. Betty had let us know in her way that she’d named her Isobel, or Izzy for short.
As Jasper drove me to the shop on my first day back, I looked out the window at the town passing by. These cozy streets that had raised me were never changing, even if everything around them adapted to each new year that came in like a constant heartbeat.
I would see an odd leaf trickle its way along the sidewalk, and it got me thinking about my garden and what harvest I would yield this year. I hoped for many herbs above all. I loved the smell of them thriving in the yard. I loved the gathering and hanging and the rustic look it gave the house after bringing the bounties of the earth inside. I even loved the arduous task of separating stems from leaves and blooms,
grinding, jarring, and labeling. It was all so comforting, and it made me happy in my heart when I finally filled the spice racks with everything I had grown. It reminded me of the sunny afternoons with Katerina at the cottage.
As we passed the market, I also hoped we would yield a few more zucchini. Jasper made the best fried zucchini. He caked it in cornmeal and spices before he roasted it for a spell and then served it piping hot with creamy tzatziki. I loved this dish as we sat out on our patio on summer nights. I had been known to almost polish off a whole plate before Jasper even sat down with our cold beers.
As we passed the Taco Bar, I was pleased to think that I had enough tomatoes for a decent-sized batch of salsa. Salsa was totally my jam!
These thoughts and ideas I had was what brought out my glow from my inner light. Creating, ideas, artistic endeavours, and reaping the offerings of the universe and earth as so many generations had done before us. It was natural and endearing to partake in life-living tasks again. I would be a part of it and keep it a part of me as long as I lived. It was my true calling.
After all, I’d lived for myself what would happen if I did not follow my heart and path to be my true self. I had been taken by lesser demons and followed damaging paths, only to be startlingly close to being lost forever—way too close for comfort. I would never let anyone or anything come between my family in our lives again. I vowed to never ever step foot near that dark place again where nothing grew and a sure death was waiting. Eternity would be hell, as that destruction was inevitable.
I had been strong enough to return from the blackness once, this I knew. But what strength I’d contributed to break from the nightmare had been surpassed by the love and support of my family, who would not let me go so easily. If they hadn’t been by my side constantly to see me every step of the way through my recovery, if they hadn’t come together and stood with me in battle, ready to fight until the end, I can most definitely say that I would have succumbed to the darkness and died on my own land.
I dabbed the corner of my eye with my finger and caught the tear that began to fall from my thoughts of appreciation and humbleness. I shook off the chill rising up my spine and let my eyes fall to a dime half hidden between the mat and the car floor. It didn’t scare me anymore, but I didn’t pick it up, either. It served now as a reminder or perhaps a token of some sort of reward. Perhaps it was a promise to always guide me back to my path should I ever fall out of line again. But then, on the other hand, maybe it was just a dime.
I held my chin up with a curve to the corner of my lips. I knew better than that.
I looked at my love driving next to me. Oh, dear God, I loved this man through and through. My heart panged as if it would burst with all the love I held for Jasper. I noticed a few new wrinkles around his eyes, the result of a deeply brooding brow. I almost frowned and was on my way back to the place where shame and pity could eat me alive when he broke me out of my gap out by glancing at me through the corner of his eye.
He grinned trickily and mouthed, “Elephant shoe.”
I smirked. That one tiny gesture brought me right back to him and the here and now, which was ultimately the only place I wanted to be. For now and forever. I grinned as big as I could with a full heart of pure happiness. That penguin smile emerged from his lips, and I just softly giggled and said, “My sweet penguin.”
I turned and rested my cheek against the cool glass of the window and continued watching the passing world. The streets were still quiet, as people hadn’t quite left for their days yet. I wanted to be early today in order to arrange myself before opening hours. It had been so very long. I prayed I would receive a warm greeting. The store could be fickle.
Then a shadow passed over the autumn sun, and then I saw something that made my jaw drop. It was him. Wait—was it him I saw sneaking around a corner? My heart began to race, and my stomach jumped up my throat. Instantly my shaky hand was on the handle, and the heat rose in my face.
Jasper, noticing the change in energy, kept glancing between me and the road. “Nic, what is it?” His tone was toeing the edge of worry.
I looked behind me and in the mirror. Nothing. He wasn’t there. Lou was dead. He could hang on now like a pitiful coward with nothing but his ghostly form, but his energy would soon run out, and he would have no choice but to be gone forever. I let out a breath and shook my head at Jasper.
Would this hold on me ever go away permanently? I prayed again with tight eyes and clenched teeth. A voice answered me and told me I was strong and loved. I was good and worthy of all love. My shoulders relaxed and my mouth slightly parted. I kept listening to this beautiful voice reassuring me of all I had gained and achieved since I’d grown the courage to fight against evil. This voice came from inside me and all around me. I felt the truth in the words and the love in its deliverance.
When I opened my eyes, the world was bright again, and Jasper was smiling encouragingly.
As we pulled up to Bella Binna Boutique, my hand was already on the handle. I looked once more to my hero for that little boost of support I required to exit the vehicle. He was there, and we needed no words. After a few beats, he nodded at me, and I returned it. His hand wrapped around the back of my neck and drew me in gently so we could touch foreheads. This time I felt love. Undying, unconquerable love of the strongest kind. We both understood. We both gave a little and took a little back.
You came to me in dreams for years before I even met you or knew you existed in the world. I believed God was showing me my true partner in life. I believed that you were ideal for me because I had seen you in my imagination from all the loneliness and longing to have an equal stand beside me in this life. There was always water and sunshine wherever we went. I knew I belonged to you and you to me. I know now that it will always be like this moment.
After a few deep breaths at my atonement, we released each other and looked into each other’s eyes. We were all smiles and kisses and glistening retinas.
With that, I got up and out the door onto the sidewalk. I smoothed out my grey wool pencil skirt and gently picked my sheer white blouse out from its creased position from the car ride. I wanted to look classy for my first day back in the world, and I thought, as I looked back at Jasper’s up-and-down gaze at me, that I had accomplished just that.
I bent down to get a closer look at him, and I realized then that I had the same something for him. If anything or anyone ever tried to take or hurt my Jasper in any way, I would not be a rational woman, to say the least. I guess that could be seen when I had been in the park with Lou, and he had suddenly set his conniving sights on Jasper for his rare and fiery gift. I would’ve drowned the world if it meant I would be saving Jasper. And God forbid, if he ever fell, I would be there picking him up every day, as he had for me. Not for returning a favour, you understand, but because put simply, that was what love was. Love didn’t give up. Love wasn’t selfish or reward seeking. It was bliss and a security knowing that there was a promise made to always take care of each other, no matter what the case may be.
That was what marriage meant to us, anyway. I felt sad in my heart when I thought not enough people knew that, and therefore, not enough people fought for their spouses. Maybe giving up seemed easier to them. It would never be said of us.
“I will be back to get you before five o’clock, my love. How about we go out for a nice dinner at the Manor to celebrate you conquering your first day back in the real world? I can bring Duke and Theo, and you bring Reg and Pipes. You call Hayden and I’ll call Joel and Tracey.” Jasper’s face darkened a tad in regret. “They would like to get out too, I’m sure.”
Joel had still not been able to walk a single step since Lou had crushed his spine. Hayden and Tracey were still looking for an answer to heal him, so far he has regained the use of his arms and neck but his legs are more stubborn. We all had faith we would figure it out.
That was one of the best ideas I had heard in far too long. “Sure, baby,” I replied with a smile, and I put m
y hand on his arm.
“Have a great day. I love you.”
“Loves, Bubs.” And still with a goofy, lovey-dovey smile on my lips, I swivelled around, letting my growing blond hair wave good-bye to Jasper as I approached my store on sure feet.
As I walked up to the glass doors of the shop, I saw a reflection from across the street of three women dancing lightly. Their hair swept around them, and their skirts billowing out in the breeze. I whipped around, but no matter how much I searched, the street was near empty. A few neighbour shop owners were busy with their keys in locks or balancing coffee cups and shopping bags. My heart fell slightly. It couldn’t have been them, I knew, but it would have been so great to fill them in on everything that had happened. Let them know we had conquered the evil of our lives and that Jasper had been able to come into his true nature, as I had. I turned back to the door to unlock it when movement in the reflection caught my eye again. It was them! They stood across the street, waving at me and blowing kisses happily. Even Laura gave me a thumbs up! Again I turned back, but they were gone.
Well, what would have really impressed me would have been if Laura had learned how to send an e-mail. I laughed. What a sweet gesture. I was so happy they’d reached out.
“Nicole? Nicole, is that you?” A shrill voice ran up my spine. I turned, already knowing it was Gladys. Really? She was pursing her lips, wearing a ridiculous hat and looking me up and down, appraising me for some long-shot opinion, memorizing my state to update her crowd of gossips later.
I stood contrapposto and raised an eyebrow. “Yes, Gladys; I suppose it is. How are you?” I managed to say through gritted teeth. I was happy to see her—very, very deep, deep down. I was glad Lou hadn’t permanently affected her that first day he’d come into the shop, but come on. Gladys was still—and forever would be—Gladys.
The Lightning Witch (Elements Book 2) Page 20
