Falling for Mr. Darcy

by KaraLynne Mackrory

  Elizabeth smiled indulgently at her sister and shook her head. “Of course not, Jane. I am certain he simply wants to hear your feelings on the matter. Go to him; you will see all is well.”

  Jane was reassured and, after giving her sister a parting hug and kiss on the cheek, left her to go to her father. Elizabeth’s knees gave way as she sank into the bed. Her thoughts were in a jumble, and she felt the beginnings of a headache. When she reflected on Jane’s good fortune, her happiness for her sister was to a degree that she could almost believe the state of her own heart inconsequential. However, her hurt feelings refused to be ignored. She could not understand how she could have misunderstood his feelings for her, but misunderstood they must have been, for he was gone and not to return.

  Once again her ire was raised at Mr. Darcy and, nearly equally, at her own silliness. She was no better than Lydia or Kitty, whose understanding in such matters was trifling. They fell easily in and out of love with any number of gentlemen. She was always disgusted at her sisters’ lack of self-control over their hearts and had prided herself in her ability not to let her heart be so easily touched without proper consideration and protection.

  She shook her head as she came to the ugly truth: she really was no wiser than her foolish little sisters. She had allowed her heart to be touched by Mr. Darcy and had deceived herself into believing that he might have returned her regard. What was even more vexing was that, as angry as she was with herself and Mr. Darcy, she could not disabuse herself of her esteem for him. Nor could she convince herself that Mr. Darcy’s personality was not everything she had ever hoped for in a partner. She groaned in frustration that he still had such power over her. She hated him, hated him with all the love in her heart.

  * * *

  Jane met Mr. Bingley outside her father’s study. Upon seeing him, she blushed deeply, remembering the long conference she just had with her sister, especially the discussion of the kiss.

  “Jane, my love, your father has given his consent. We are to be married, and I can hardly contain my happiness.” Mr. Bingley took her hand in his and brushed a light kiss across her knuckles. “You must go to him now; he wishes to speak to you. I will await you out here.”

  “Thank you, Charles,” she whispered, as she shyly stole a look at his face before entering her father’s study.

  Jane closed the door before turning to her father. Her smile could hardly be contained as she saw his tender expression. She ran to him, threw her arms around his neck and gave him a kiss on the cheek. “Oh, Papa, thank you! He is truly the best man.”

  Mr. Bennet was momentarily surprised at the exuberant physical display from his usually reserved daughter. His surprise turned to embarrassment as her happiness caused his eyes to gather moisture. He cleared his suddenly thick throat and attempted to express a tone of indifference as he patted her shoulder. “Now, now, Jane there is no need for this. That will do.” He gently pulled her arms from his neck and slid his hands down to hold hers. It had been many years since any of his daughters had embraced him, and although it caused memories of pleasant nostalgia, it also caused him to lose his composure a bit.

  “Come, child; sit with me a moment, and we shall talk.” He led her to the window seat, sat her down and found his seat. He smiled to himself as he realized it was the same place he had talked to Lizzy about love only days before. “Well, Jane dear, your Mr. Bingley tells me he would like to marry you.”

  “Yes,” she replied shyly.

  “And he also tells me that you would like to marry him.”

  “Yes.” Her voice was softer still and her cheeks colored slightly.

  “Well, I am glad to hear it, dear, as I have given him permission to do so.” He waited until she looked up at him before continuing. “Do you love him, Jane?”

  Mr. Bennet already knew the answer to his question. Even if he had not seen the way her eyes filled with light and her cheeks turned rosy, her lips had transformed into a serene smile that spoke the answer before she voiced it.

  “I do, Papa. I love him. He is everything a gentleman ought to be if he can: kind, generous, happy and handsome.” She smiled at her father and then looked at her hands in embarrassment at her effusive praise of the man.

  “And rich, too,” he added.

  “I do not care about his money, Papa.” She warned him with her voice firm, her face suddenly serious.

  Mr. Bennet gave her small hands a gentle squeeze. “I know, dear. I just wanted to make sure your heart was where it should be, though I should have suspected no less from you, Jane.”

  “Thank you, Papa.”

  “I think you and Mr. Bingley will be a good match. You are both so kind you will never fight, so affable, the servants will cheat you, and so generous, you will exceed your income.”

  Jane laughed at her father’s teasing. “No, indeed, Papa!”

  Mr. Bennet watched his daughter laugh and felt an overwhelming tenderness come over him. She was his first great love from the moment she was placed in his arms as an infant. Now, she was a beautiful young lady who would soon be in the arms of another. He felt a momentary sting at the upcoming loss and said with feeling, “Jane, sweetheart, promise your Papa you will save a small part of your heart for me. Surely, your Mr. Bingley can spare a tiny portion.”

  Jane reached up to pat the side of his face. “I will always be your little girl, Papa.”

  “And for that, I am glad.” Mr. Bennet cleared the emotion from his throat, and they sat quietly for a few moments. Mr. Bennet reflected with sadness upon his interview with Mary the day she became engaged. When he asked if she loved Mr. Collins, she had nearly laughed at him. Her response still struck him with regret. “Love? Really, Papa, I do not see what that has to do with this. He has a sufficient income, we have some things in common, and it is a prudent match for me. I had not cared to ever marry, but Mr. Collins has asked me, and I figured I might as well as not. It would also mean saving the entail, though I confess, I did not really care about that.” Mr. Bennet sighed as he turned to his eldest daughter, who was now thinking of her intended, for it was written all over her face.

  “Jane, I have something I would like to speak about with you and Mr. Bingley. I will go get him now.” He smiled and went to the door. Upon opening it, he saw Mr. Bingley pacing the floor just outside. Hiding a smile of amusement, he issued an invitation for the gentleman to enter.

  Mr. Bingley walked into the study with a bit of apprehension and looked around as to where he should sit. He wanted to go sit next to Jane at the window seat, but there were other chairs near the desk. With Mr. Bennet in the room, he did not know what to do. He looked at Jane; she smiled. It was decided; he went to sit next to her.

  Mr. Bennet hid a smile of contentment at the image the future held for this daughter, then closed the door and turned to the couple. “Well, Jane, Mr. Bingley, I would like to be the first to wish you joy.”

  Mr. Bingley and his betrothed gave their thanks and watched curiously as Mr. Bennet went to his desk and took out a paper from a drawer. They did not understand why he had invited Mr. Bingley into the study or why Jane had not been dismissed, but before they could think long on the subject, Mr. Bennet began to speak.

  “Mr. Bingley, I assume you will have your solicitor write up settlement documents for me to sign, am I correct?”

  Mr. Bingley sat up straighter and appeared slightly uncomfortable as he looked briefly towards Jane. Mr. Bennet recognized his momentary discomfort for what it was and tried to put him at ease. “Mr. Bingley, I understand it is not generally the custom to include ladies in such a discussion of business and that generally this conversation would be between just the two of us and perhaps your man of business. However, as what I have to say to you will pertain to my daughter, I ask that we continue with her in our company.”

  Mr. Bingley hastened to respond, “Mr. Bennet, I meant no offense. I am perfectly willing to have this discussion with Jane present, as I intend to have no secrets between us. I had no
t planned on keeping the settlement decisions from her.”

  “I am glad to hear it, sir.” Mr. Bennet took up his quill, filled in a few spots on the paper he had pulled from the desk, and signed his name at the bottom before looking up to address the couple before him. “When you meet with your solicitor, you will need to give him this. It is a statement of the portion Jane will receive upon the event of your wedding.” He stood and handed the paper to Mr. Bingley.

  Mr. Bingley began to put the paper in his breast pocket, but he was stopped as Mr. Bennet requested that he and Jane read it. Mr. Bingley furrowed his brow but acquiesced. His eyes went wide, as did Jane’s, when he read the figure her father had written in regarding her dowry.

  “Papa, this is not funny . . . ”

  “Sir, there is a mistake . . . ”

  They both spoke at once with matching looks of confusion at Mr. Bennet, who stood gazing out the window.

  “It is no joke, Jane, and there is no mistake, Mr. Bingley.”

  “Sir, I do not mean to be impertinent, but I knew Jane had no fortune, and I have not asked that you provide her with one in order for me to marry her.” Mr. Bingley was beginning to feel a little offended at seeing the large number on the page. What might Mr. Bennet assume about him?

  Jane was equally worried but for a different reason. “Papa, you must not do this. What about Mama and my sisters. It would not be fair to dispense with so much for me at such a cost to them.”

  Mr. Bingley’s anxiety forced him to speak again. “I know it is yet again impertinent for me to say so, sir, but you cannot afford this.”

  Mr. Bennet turned from the window and gave the two people waiting for his response a small smile. He took a deep breath and sighed before he began. “Do not worry yourselves. Mr. Bingley, I can, indeed, afford it. What I am about to tell you both must be kept in the strictest confidence. As you will see if you read the bottom portion of the letter, it specifies that if either of you speak of this matter to anyone else, the portion will revert back to the previously stated fifty pounds. Do I have your assurances of privacy?” He looked to his daughter and her intended and, with the incredulous nods of their promise, continued. “Twenty-three years ago, I married a woman and inherited Longbourn. I was not in love with your mother, Jane.” He said it almost as an apology.

  “I know, Papa,” Jane offered, and gave him a small smile to indicate she understood his regrets.

  “It was not long before I repented my decision. When you were born a year later, Jane, I decided that I did not want you to marry for convenience as I did. I wished you to marry for love, for I knew I would not always be there to love you and wanted you to be loved all your life. I began to economize and led your mother, and the neighborhood, to believe that I was negligent in my estate duties and that the estate was not as profitable as it once had been under my father’s management. Thus, for twenty-odd years I was able to save several thousand pounds each year for dowries for you and your sisters.”

  “But I do not understand. Why would you want everyone to believe Longbourn was not profitable?” Mr. Bingley queried.

  “Mr. Bingley, if it were well known that my daughters each had a dowry of fifteen thousand pounds, do you think I would have men showing up at my door with real affection? The answer is no; I would have to beat back the influx of suitors coming for my girls. Although they might fall in love and marry for love with the knowledge of their true fortune generally known, I believed it more likely that they would find a love match if they were not seen as wealthy. A gentleman who is willing to marry for love, regardless of fortune, is the only kind of gentleman my daughters deserve.”

  Jane began to see the wisdom in what her father had done and, with astonishment, said, “Can it really be true, Father? Fifteen thousand pounds?” Her voice fell away at the thought.

  “Jane, Mr. Bingley, the reason I have asked for your secrecy is not just so that my remaining daughters may have a chance to win the hearts of worthy men but also because I have stipulated that my daughters will only receive the larger sum if they marry for love. If they do not, they will get the publicly acknowledged fifty pounds and an equal portion of five thousand pounds at the death of their mother.”

  Jane and Mr. Bingley sat stunned for a moment as they took in the news. Suddenly, the reminder that tomorrow Mr. Collins was to marry her sister came to mind. Jane knew that Mary did not love Mr. Collins, nor he her.

  She looked to her father, who had been watching the play of emotions across her face. “And so Mary . . . ?”

  With a solemn and sad face, Mr. Bennet replied, “Will not get the fifteen thousand pounds.” He turned to look out the window. “I wish . . . ”

  Jane stood and went to her father. She put a hand on his arm and looked at him as she said, “Papa, you cannot make the choices for them. You are a wise father, and I am proud of you for standing for your convictions. My gratitude for your sacrifice is great. I appreciate the opportunity to find a match based on love.”

  Mr. Bingley stood to join them. “Mr. Bennet, I too would like to thank you for your generosity and tender love for your daughter. I do not care whether she comes with fifty pounds or fifty thousand. I am grateful for the chance just to love her.”

  Mr. Bennet nodded his acceptance of their gratitude and turned to shake Mr. Bingley’s hand as he said, “Welcome to the family, sir.”

  Chapter 11

  The morning of Mary Bennet’s wedding dawned a cloudless, cold, mid-December day. Elizabeth and Jane remained in their bedchamber to minimize exposure to the nervous flutterings of their mother on the first of five of the most important days of her life — her daughters’ wedding days. Elizabeth and her sister had talked late into the evening about Jane’s engagement to Mr. Bingley and Mary’s wedding the next day. Elizabeth thought it strange that Jane suddenly seemed quite disturbed that Mary was marrying Mr. Collins. Jane had always found positive attributes about their cousin; it was in her easy nature to see the good in everyone. She even rebuked Elizabeth a time or two for speaking so ill of him during his stay at Longbourn. Yet now, the idea of the two marrying seemed to sadden her. Elizabeth wondered at the changed perspective as she prepared Jane’s hair for the day.

  Elizabeth thought about how Jane had always found reasons to view Mary’s marriage as a positive event for the family but now seemed to judge her sister as having missed out on the opportunity for a marriage with love. Elizabeth smiled as she considered the reason for Jane’s new romantic prospect. Having found a love match herself, Jane simply could not consider anything less as good enough for the rest of her sisters. Elizabeth concluded that Jane’s new opinion on the matter must have stemmed from this profound new happiness with Bingley.

  A knock on the door and the sound of their Aunt Gardiner’s voice brought a smile to the girls’ faces as they bid their aunt to enter. Aunt and Uncle Gardiner and their children had arrived late the previous evening from London to attend the wedding. They were to return to London just after Christmas.

  “Jane, Lizzy, I see you are awake. I thought I would see you at breakfast this morning, but instead I find you hiding yourselves in your room.” She glanced at the empty breakfast trays that indicated they had broken their fast in private.

  “Aunt Gardiner!” Elizabeth exclaimed, as she went to her aunt and enveloped her in a warm embrace. “Was your journey very bad? You arrived quite late.”

  “It was perfectly fine, Lizzy. Your uncle had some business matters to finish, so our departure was later than I had hoped.” She turned to Jane to receive a hug and then grasped Jane’s arms. “Jane, I have heard of nothing else this morning but weddings. Your mother is in fine form for Mary’s wedding, but she also has spoken of another wedding in the future.” Madeline Gardiner pinched her lips into a smirk and raised her eyebrow.

  Jane smiled radiantly. “Yes, Aunt, I am also to be married soon.”

  “I am glad to hear it. Your mother has made much mention of the groom, but since I had received Lizzy�
��s letter regarding your courtship, I could easily determine which of my nieces this Mr. Bingley was likely to marry.”

  They all laughed and sat down together to catch up. Jane again expressed her delight in her engagement to Mr. Bingley and, as her aunt asked many questions about the proposal, courtship and, of course, the gentleman, the ladies were engaged in discussion for much of the morning. Elizabeth prided herself in her relative composure during the course of the conversation. However, as she had detected more than one interested glance from her aunt, she knew that her deception might not be entirely effective in the eyes of the lady who knew her best.

  Before long, the time to leave for the church was at hand, and with less fanfare than Elizabeth would have expected, the entire population of Longbourn exited the house into carriages and rode to the church.

  As Elizabeth settled herself in the pew to wait for the services to start, she had to marvel at the simplicity of the wedding arrangements. It was clear that time had been a major factor in putting limits on her mother’s arrangements, but Elizabeth also knew that Mary had insisted on a simple wedding and, to the astonishment of all, was able to carry her point all the way towards convincing their mother. Elizabeth smiled in amazement at the way her sister had stood up to her mother, and she admitted she was impressed with Mary in this regard.

  Elizabeth looked around at the assembled group. A few of their neighbors were in attendance, including Mr. Bingley, who sat with Jane and the Gardiners in conversation. Elizabeth turned her gaze to watch Mr. Collins speaking to the Reverend Watkins. It was obvious that Mr. Collins was attempting to counsel the more experienced man in regards to the wedding ceremony. She bit her lip in an attempt to quell her laughter as she watched the scene. It appeared Mr. Collins was expressing his wish for Reverend Watkins to recognize Lady Catherine de Bourgh’s approval of the wedding in his opening statements, but it seemed to Elizabeth that her parson of fifteen years was not inclined to do so.