Ask Me If I Care

by Vale, Lani Lynn

  Whatever the reason, this felt like something I never imagined that it could.

  Sex had never been bad for me per se, but it’d never felt like this.

  Like I would die if he didn’t get all the way inside of me.

  We worked like this for a while, pushing and pulling. Until finally he was in me as far as he could go, and my ass was resting on the top of his hard thighs.

  I panted, feeling so full that I might burst.

  “God,” I breathed. “Why does it feel like this?”

  “Like what?” he rumbled, pulling one of his hands off of my thighs and running it down the length of my spine. “Like if I pulled out, you might cry?”

  I laughed, causing him to hiss in a breath. “Don’t.”

  I squeezed him again, and the hand that was running down my spine clutched onto my ass and dug into the meat.

  “Don’t,” he pleaded this time. “I’m barely hanging on.”

  “Is that why we’re not moving?” I asked, squirming on his lap.

  He bent forward and gathered me to him, his chest pressing into my bare back as his hands moved around to cup my breasts.

  “That’s exactly why,” he said. “I don’t want to embarrass myself. I haven’t done this since…” he hesitated. “Since the chick at the grocery store.”

  I blinked, turning my head to run my lips over his cheek.

  “That’s not a bad thing,” I found myself saying. “But it’s been a while for me, too. So if you wanted to move, and happened to come early, I know that I would be following right behind you.”

  He did start moving then, taking me at my word. His hands stayed on my breasts as he helped me move up and down.

  His fingers on my nipples, and the way his cock dragged deliciously against a bundle of nerves inside of me, was enough to have my entire being soaring straight toward orgasm.

  I’d never come with a man before without touching my clit.

  But I knew without a doubt that today would be the first time ever that I did.

  I could feel myself building. It was something that felt so incredibly startling that at first I was unsure of what it was that I was feeling.

  I mean, I’d had orgasms before. But nothing could’ve prepared me for what it would feel like from penetration only.

  It felt deeper somehow. More visceral. As if I was gathering the feeling from somewhere deep inside, readying for it to blow me away into tiny little pieces that I might never be able to put back together again.

  Things went fast after that, and I wasn’t altogether sure how in the hell it came to be, but suddenly I was coming, and slamming myself down onto his cock using the steering wheel as leverage.

  At one point my elbow must’ve slipped and anchored itself into the horn, because when I finally came to, breathing ragged, it was to find Hayes panting against my neck, body tensing as he lifted me up and down. And the horn blaring.

  I lifted my elbow up slightly, quieting the horn.

  And Hayes started to chuckle against my neck.

  “Holy shit.”

  Holy shit was right.

  Though, even those two words weren’t good enough for what had just happened.

  Holy experience, maybe. Holy when can I do that again, more likely.

  The last slide of his cock was deliciously bittersweet as he slid out of me, and I moaned at his exit.

  “Fuck, I wish we could do it all over again. But I only have one condom,” he mumbled.

  I agreed wholeheartedly. But, as the euphoria started to leave my veins, I started to feel incredibly tender between my legs.

  So maybe it was a good thing.

  He helped me up and off of his lap, slapping my ass lightly when I might’ve accidentally put it in his face as I crawled into my own seat.

  Chuckling, I sat down, ass on the bare leather.

  “Heated seats,” I said as I looked down. “I didn’t notice it before.”

  He chuckled darkly and disentangled my bra from somewhere by the door.

  The next five minutes were used getting dressed on my part, and him disposing of the condom in the dumpster next to where we were parked.

  I blushed profusely as he climbed back into his truck, and he chuckled softly. “It’s okay, sweetness. What we just did is nothing to be embarrassed about.”

  I bit my lip but nodded.

  “I know.”

  Chapter 11

  If you really love me, you’ll let me sleep.

  -Ares’ secret thoughts

  Ares

  The hike was a success, and I loved his friends. More so, I was glad that Hayes had the kind of support system that he did. The vets varied in size, color and disability.

  One, his name was Grifter, was a double amputee with a sunny disposition.

  Then there was Joseph, a very stabby-like man who had a very gloomy disposition. He, Hayes informed me, was the man that built a bunker in the middle of nowhere and lived off the grid.

  Alec was the youngest of the group at twenty-one, and he was also the most what I would call damaged—at least physically. Fifty-nine percent of his body had been burned in a helicopter accident. And he was also very shy, and definitely the quietest of the bunch.

  Kincaid was the oldest of the group at the age of forty-nine, and also the leader. The one that coordinated all the hiking events

  “Ares?”

  I blinked, startled out of my review of the men, to see Hayes staring at me in concern.

  He was driving in the direction of my place, and I almost felt my heart sink into my feet at the thought of it.

  “Are you taking me home?” I asked curiously.

  He swallowed, his eyes taking me in as he said, “I wasn’t planning on it. Do you want to go home?”

  I shook my head. No, I most certainly didn’t want to go. Not at all. I wanted to stay with him and continue to be happy as fuck.

  “We’re being honored at the high school game tonight,” Hayes said. “I’m not sure why I’m going, to be honest. But they want me to go for some fucked up reason, so I’ll go.”

  “They want you to go because they like you,” I told him.

  “I don’t talk,” he said.

  No, he didn’t.

  But that was okay.

  “You’re a quiet presence that listens,” I amended for him. “Which sometimes is what people need.”

  He glanced at me out of the corner of his eye, but I could tell that my words hit home.

  “True,” he admitted. “Though, just sayin’, I only listen because I don’t want them to ask me any questions.”

  I snickered. “That’s okay.”

  He was quiet for a long time, and I went back to my own thoughts, thinking about how the day had gone from start to finish.

  When we’d gotten there, we were the last to arrive. As soon as we got situated, we started off on our hike, and that was when I realized that I was the only added member of their group to be there. Though, none of them had said a word to question me.

  “How did you like the boys?” he asked.

  I grinned as I thought about his friends.

  “I like them,” I said. “It has me wondering, though. Why don’t you have any of your SWAT team members go with you? It seems like they would benefit from that, too.”

  “I’ve asked,” he said as he clenched and unclenched the steering wheel. “I’ve practically begged Malachi to come. Yet, none of them think they’re fucked up enough to need any ‘bonding activities.’”

  I rolled my eyes. “You’ll get them there one day. Don’t worry.”

  He went back to his silence, and I closed my eyes, intending to just rest.

  But the next time I woke up, we were parked in front of a stadium and Hayes was outside the truck leaning against the hood. I wasn’t sure who he was talking to, but I got out anyway and walked toward him.

  It wasn’t until I was closer that I saw Grifter and Kinkaid stan
ding there with him.

  I smiled and shivered at the same time. “Whew, it got cold.”

  “It did,” he agreed, smoothing his hand up and down my arm as he pulled me in closer.

  I pressed my face against his chest and thought about how awesome it felt to be in his arms.

  And by awesome, I meant magnificent. I never wanted him to let me go.

  I curled my arms around in front of me and tried to practically crawl into his body, causing him to chuckle.

  “Get up for a minute,” he ordered.

  I did so, albeit reluctantly, and watched as he disappeared back to the side of his truck.

  I watched him go for a few seconds before I turned and surveyed the men that were staring at me.

  “You’re good for him,” Kincaid said.

  My brows must’ve met my hairline because he immediately started to explain.

  “I’ve never seen him talk to another human being before like he talks to you,” he said. “He’s very quiet and withdrawn. He participates, but he’s always on the outskirts. The outside looking in.”

  That made me feel kind of awful.

  More so, I didn’t want Hayes to feel like the outsider. I wanted him to think that he belonged.

  At least with me, I hoped he knew he would always be on the inside.

  Somewhere in the vicinity of my quickly-falling-for-him heart.

  “How’d y’all meet?” Kincaid asked, his eyes going behind me.

  “We met at a police banquet. He glared at me the whole time,” I admitted.

  I felt warm palms on my cold arms just as Hayes said, “I didn’t glare at you the whole time.”

  I snorted indelicately. “Really? What would you call it?”

  “I’d call it me liking you, but not knowing what to do when it came to your attitude.” He paused. “Also, you dated my brother. I wasn’t sure how many brain cells you had in your head, and I was worried I was liking someone that was full of herself. You know, his normal type.”

  I swatted him across the chest, but my smack was rebounded when it came into contact with something soft.

  I pressed my hand to it and he smiled before pushing the softness into my hand. “Here. It’s for you.”

  My mouth opened and then closed as my hand refused to take the jacket.

  “Here,” he said, forcing me to take an almost identical jacket to the one I’d admired at the Mexican restaurant a few days ago that Rowen had worn.

  I gasped and pulled it into my arms.

  “I even washed it for you,” he said, eyes skittering around the parking lot as if he was trying to look anywhere but at me.

  I couldn’t stop myself.

  I had to do it.

  Throwing myself forward, I curved my arms around Hayes’ neck and hugged him tight.

  I must’ve surprised him because at first he didn’t reciprocate at all.

  But then, once he got over the initial shock, he curved his arms around my lower back and pulled me into him tightly.

  “I love it, thank you,” I said. “I really did want it.”

  Kincaid snorted and caught my attention as he gestured to the front gate. “Now that Sleeping Beauty is awake, let’s go inside.”

  Hayes looked reluctant, and I almost felt kind of bad for him.

  But I was thinking that getting out amongst the regulars would be good for him.

  Except, it wasn’t.

  It was terrible, and it started when we first entered the building, and the crush of people trying to get to their seat started to close in on him.

  “Wow,” I said when my body got jostled. “There are quite a few people here. Why?”

  “It’s the homecoming game,” Kincaid answered. “More people. Bigger game. And they’re playing the number one ranked team, their rivals.”

  “Ahh,” I said in understanding. “I don’t know much about Longview other than they won the state championship last year.”

  “You live in Texas,” he said as if it was obvious that I should know football based solely on my geographic location.

  “And?” I said, allowing my Texas twang to come into my voice.

  Kincaid laughed and Hayes drew me closer into his body before letting me go. “Get that on and let’s go.”

  I did, pulling it on and moaning at the feel of the warm fabric hugging my skin.

  “It’s like I’m in a cloud,” I purred.

  I caught Hayes’ hand as I walked with him into the game.

  When we got to where they were taking our tickets, I got to go inside for free based solely on who I was with.

  “Y’all are famous,” I teased as we walked past the long line of the concession stand.

  “Famous?” Hayes scoffed. “More like cursed.”

  “Amen,” Kincaid said. “Too many people here.”

  “At least they’re doing clear bags.”

  That was from Alec, who I hadn’t realized had joined us until just then.

  I looked at all the clear bags.

  “What do all the clear bags have to do with anything?” I asked.

  “No weapons can be concealed in a clear bag,” Alec said.

  I snorted. “They could just stash it in their foam finger. At least, a handgun anyway.”

  Hayes’ hand tightened on mine.

  “I wonder if they’ve thought of that,” Hayes rumbled, looking at all the foam fingers.

  “They do a bag check now,” Kincaid said. “We went in through the express lane, where the people with no bags can zip through.”

  “Ahhh,” I said. “Well, then they’d just have to conceal it on their person. Unless they’re getting patted down.”

  Hayes’ hand covered my mouth. “Careful, your police dad is showing.”

  I licked his hand, causing him to chuckle and pull it away.

  “I’m just sayin’,” I said. “Unless they start using a metal detector, it isn’t going to matter if they check bags.”

  Alec sighed. “All the sense of security I felt as I came in is long gone. Thanks, Negative Nancy.”

  “Ares,” I corrected him. “I think you mispronounced my name.”

  Hayes squeezed my hand and tugged me sideways to miss a mother on her phone that wasn’t paying attention to where she was walking, or where her toddler was walking.

  The toddler went under Hayes and my conjoined hands, and I just barely missed hitting the mother with my shoulder.

  Instead of leading us to the bleachers, though, Hayes took me to the hill that was clear across the stadium. Alec and Kincaid went to the seats in the stands, and I couldn’t say I was upset by this. Especially not when he pulled me down between his thighs and wrapped his arms around me, my back to his front.

  We watched the game like this until halftime when I went to gather drinks and popcorn.

  When I got back it was in time for the man holding the gun that shot the shirts out into the crowd to walk up aiming his pipe toward us.

  The gun went off, and Hayes jerked like he was shot for real, and not just shot at by a t-shirt.

  I pulled the t-shirt into my hands and turned to Hayes with a smile on my face. That smile quickly dropped off my face when I saw him looking glassy-eyed down at his hands.

  “Hayes?” I asked, patting his leg. “What is it?”

  He blinked a few times, his eyes coming back into focus, and said, “I…nothing.”

  I swallowed, worried now that something had happened that I had no clue why it was important.

  But I knew it was.

  Whatever had happened, wherever he’d gone? It’d been somewhere I didn’t want him to be.

  Which was why I started talking about stupid stuff—babies.

  Not that babies were stupid. The idea of having one right now was stupid.

  “I knew from when I was a young girl that I wanted to have babies,” I said. “Eventually, I’d like to quit my job and be a stay-at-home mother.”

&n
bsp; His body loosened infinitesimally behind me, letting me know that my talking was working.

  “I want ten kids.”

  He drew in a deep breath, then released it, his hot breath blowing against the back of my neck.

  “Five boys and five girls,” I continued.

  He bent down and rested his forehead against my shoulder. “Why ten kids?”

  I snickered. “I don’t know. I guess I just always had a nice, even number. And ten seemed like the perfect amount.”

  He pressed a kiss to my shoulder.

  “I was lost just a second ago,” he murmured. “Thank you.”

  I smiled as I watched the second half kick-off.

  “They should really be careful about where they were aiming that sucker. What if it’d hit me in the face? My nose bleeds easily,” I teased.

  He chuckled and moved until his chin could rest on my head.

  “Did you ever get that checked out? It’s not normal for a nose to bleed like that,” he murmured.

  “I had some arteries in my nose cauterized when I was younger because it was so bad. But even the slightest bump now still causes massive bleeds,” I said. “Sometimes I wake up in the middle of the night and I look like a murder victim.”

  He hummed something that sounded like ‘son of a bitch’ but I didn’t ask him for clarification.

  I enjoyed where I was sitting until the very end of the game.

  When I went to sit up, fireworks started to go off above my head, and I gasped.

  “Oh, look!” I pointed.

  But the body behind my back was gone, and when I looked back, it was to find Hayes on the ground with his hands covering his head.

  Literally, the big man was burying his face in the grass as his shoulders tensed.

  Everyone around us, instead of watching the fireworks, were looking at the huge man now cringing and trying to disappear into the grass.

  People were starting to point and whisper, gathering Hayes more and more attention.

  And with each fucking firework that went off, his shoulders would tense more and more and more.

  I didn’t really know what I was doing, but I saw that he was scared, and not in the right frame of mind.

  So I dropped down to lay on the grass with him, my eyes on the side of his face as he squeezed his eyes tightly shut.

  “Hayes,” I said softly, not touching him because I wasn’t sure whether he would welcome touch just yet. “Hayes, look at me.”