Sweet as Honey

by Jennifer Beckstrand

  “Have her home by seven,” Aunt B said.

  Paul screwed his lips into an argument before he seemed to think better of it and nodded. Maybe he realized he had pushed everyone to the edge of their patience.

  In spite of her rudeness of inviting Dan to dinner and then leaving, Dan gave her a genuine smile. She smiled back, feeling a hundred times better knowing that he harbored no ill will.

  “Have a nice time,” he said. “Eat one of those delicious rolls for me.”

  His manner was so kind and his expression so handsome, Lily reconsidered going. Wouldn’t it be fun to sit next to Dan during dinner and listen to him tease Aunt B? What if he and Poppy got into one of their good-natured arguments? He might even be able to convince Rose to attend the gathering next week. Lily would love to be there to see it.

  Paul placed a hand on her shoulder. “She can eat all the rolls she wants. I’m paying.”

  Lily paused to gaze into Dan’s eyes, hoping to communicate an apology to him without saying anything. One side of his mouth curled up, and he winked. Lily lowered her head and tried to think of anything else besides Dan Kanagy’s chocolate-brown eyes. Paul would be suspicious if she blushed.

  They walked down the steps and across the flagstones while Dan, her sisters, and Aunt B watched from the porch. Lily nearly jumped out of her skin as Paul squealed like a little buplie, waved his hands wildly around his head, and ran around the grass as if he were being chased by a rabid dog.

  “You’re trampling the dandelions,” Aunt Bitsy yelled, but Paul was too busy doing his little dance to hear her.

  “Paul, what’s wrong?” Lily said.

  Paul flailed his arms and shook his head so hard his hat fell off. “There’s a bee on me. Get it off. Get it off.”

  Lily grabbed one of his suspenders and pulled him toward her. “Hold still, and let me see.”

  Breathing heavily, he did as he was told, only flinching once when Lily brushed an imaginary bug off his shoulder.

  “It’s gone now.”

  “You know,” Poppy called from the porch, “if you hold still and don’t make any sudden movements, the bees will usually fly away.”

  Lily shot her family a warning look. Poppy looked on the verge of hysterical laughter. Rose seemed almost as amused as Poppy. Aunt B had her eyes turned to the sky, but what she particularly wanted to complain to the Lord about remained a mystery. She didn’t say a word.

  Dan covered his mouth with his hand as if he were casually fingering the whiskers on his face, but Lily suspected he hid a big grin behind it. She couldn’t blame him, but she was grateful that he tried to cover it. Surely Paul felt plenty embarrassed yet.

  Paul huffed out an angry breath and refused to turn his eyes to the porch. “Let’s get out of here.”

  He didn’t say another word until they were safely over the bridge and on the road. “Of all the stuff, Lily. Why do you have to have all those bees?”

  Chapter Sixteen

  Lily squeezed the water out of her hair with a towel after her shower. It felt so good to wash off the sticky honey and grime from two days’ worth of honey harvesting. They’d spent another full day extracting the honey from the clover field hives. Lily and Rose had spun the honey while Poppy and Aunt B had replaced supers and weeded the garden. They’d do the basswood tree hives tomorrow, and next week they’d start on the hives at the sunflower farm. The job there took more time because they had to load up the supers and transport them three miles to the honey house.

  Maybe Dan would be able to help.

  Maybe not. At dinner last night, Paul had all but ordered her to banish Dan from their property forever. She hadn’t agreed to a banishment, but she had told Paul she would think about it.

  She couldn’t ask Dan to never come back. He was so willing to help, so excited to learn about their bees, so eager to get to know her family better. And they still had so many books to talk about. She couldn’t hurt his feelings and tell him not to come anymore, even if Dan had no problem hurting her feelings, as Paul had reminded her several times last night.

  Rose came into the bedroom and sat down on Lily’s bed. The three girls shared a room, but they each had their own bed. Lily loved being so close at night without having to sleep in the same bed as her sisters. Poppy kicked something terrible, and Rose liked to cuddle. Lily appreciated her space.

  Enticing aromas wafted from the kitchen. Aunt B had made meat loaf for dinner with her famous honey glaze. Lily didn’t realize how famished she was until she smelled that smell.

  “I think you should put on your yellow dress for dinner,” Rose said, intently studying the Log Cabin pattern on the quilt that covered Lily’s bed.

  “Why?”

  “Dan Kanagy’s downstairs.”

  Lily’s heart did that involuntary thumping thing again, and she hadn’t even been exercising. Dan was here. That wasn’t anything extraordinary.

  So why was her heart jumping up and down inside her chest?

  What would he say to her about last night? She had been pretty rude. Still, he had smiled at her just before she climbed into Paul’s buggy. He didn’t seem angry, and he wasn’t the type to hold a grudge.

  “Did he come to help with the honey? He’s a little late.”

  “Nae. Last night he told us that as soon as the cows were milked in the afternoon, he would come and help us catch our mouse. That mouse made an appearance last night, and Aunt Bitsy put another dent in the floor with her meat cleaver. Farrah Fawcett didn’t so much as twitch a whisker.”

  Lily laughed. “I hope Aunt B doesn’t chop off her own foot someday.”

  “Dan said he could come tomorrow morning first thing and help us load the supers onto the wagon.” Rose studied Lily’s face and smiled tentatively. “He’s real nice, Lily. He ate three helpings of chicken and helped do dishes. He scrubbed the chicken pan, even. I like him a lot.”

  “He didn’t get mad about my leaving last night.”

  Rose frowned. “That wasn’t your fault. Paul is hard to say no to. Aunt Bitsy says he’s high maintenance.”

  “What does that mean?”

  “I’m not sure. Some Englisch expression.” Rose grabbed Lily’s hand. Her eyes sparkled as if she had a secret. “Maybe we can talk Dan into staying for dinner again.”

  Lily dressed quickly—in her yellow dress—and ran halfway down the stairs before she realized how childish she must look. She slowed her pace to a walk, and entered the kitchen like a mature young woman.

  Dan and Aunt B stood at the island intently studying what looked like a pile of odds and ends on the counter.

  Dan’s smile would have put the sun to shame. “Lily. I’ve been anxiously waiting for you. I get so forlorn when I don’t see you.”

  Lily rolled her eyes. “Ha ha. Don’t tease me, Dan Kanagy.”

  “I would never,” he said, and for a second, he looked so sincere, she believed him, but then the playful glint in his eye gave him away.

  “Ach, Dan Kanagy. Stop it.”

  Aunt B didn’t even look up. “So first I need to cut this bottle?”

  With what looked like great effort, Dan tore his gaze from Lily’s face and nodded at Aunt B. “Jah. I will do it for you if you want.”

  “I don’t want you bleeding on my counter when you cut off all your fingers,” Aunt B said.

  “What are you doing?” Rose asked as she followed Lily down the stairs.

  “We’re making a mousetrap.”

  “A humane mousetrap,” Dan said. “You can catch the mouse and set it free in the field.”

  Aunt B smirked. “If I set it free, it will just come back. I’m going to feed it to the cat.”

  Lily eyed Farrah Fawcett lounging on the window seat. “I don’t think Farrah Fawcett could be bothered to eat a mouse, even if she were starving.”

  Aunt B’s smirk drooped. “Farrah Fawcett won’t even eat dry cat food.” She shook her finger in the cat’s direction. “You are a food snob, Farrah Fawcett. The mice know
if they come to our house, they’ll be perfectly safe to roam the halls and eat our food.”

  Dan showed Aunt B how to make the mousetrap. She cut the plastic water bottle so that only a small piece held the two ends together. They made four holes and stuck two bamboo skewers through either side, then used string and rubber bands to fashion something that stayed open until a mouse ate the cheese inside and sprung the two sides of the bottle shut.

  “Very clever,” Lily said.

  Aunt B picked it up and studied it from all angles. “What’s to keep the mouse from escaping through the slit in the bottle?”

  Dan shrugged. “I don’t know. The book at the library said it would work.”

  “I suppose,” Aunt B said. “But I won’t get my hopes up.” She took the mousetrap into the storage room. “I’m putting it on the floor in the corner,” she called. “It’s the last place I saw him.”

  It was also the place with the most meat cleaver divots.

  Aunt B emerged from the storage room with a bottle of chowchow and ajar of cherry jam. “Much as I hate having to feed you all the time, Dan Kanagy, you did bring a mousetrap, which is more than Farrah Fawcett’s done since I got her. You might as well stay for dinner.”

  Dan beamed. “I’d love to if it’s not too much trouble.”

  “Of course it’s too much trouble, but I’ve invited you, so I won’t take it back no matter how much I want to.” She grasped the lid of the jam jar, and her face turned red trying to unscrew it. Without asking, Dan took it from her and opened it as easy as you please. He handed the bottle back to her and flashed a wide grin.

  “Don’t get cocky,” Aunt B said.

  Dan merely grinned wider and made Lily giggle.

  Aunt B narrowed her eyes and poured the chowchow into a bowl. “The meat loaf’s almost done. Rose, why don’t you go find Poppy while Lily and Dan set the table? I have to go upstairs.” She stuttered a little. “Because I have to go up there.”

  What did she mean by that?

  Rose went outside while Bitsy disappeared up the stairs. Lily retrieved five plates and cups from the cupboard. When she turned around, Dan stood right behind her as if he’d meant to get that close. When she jumped a little, he smiled that dazzling smile, held out his hands, and took the plates from her. “You, uh, you smell really good.”

  She felt warmth travel up her face as she took him by the shoulders and turned him around. “Dial soap,” she said, nudging him in the direction of the table. “And don’t get fresh.”

  He chuckled. “I didn’t mean to embarrass you.” He set the plates on the table. “How did extraction go today? I’m sorry I couldn’t be here.”

  “We got less honey than yesterday, but it took almost two hours longer.”

  “I can come tomorrow morning and lift supers for you.”

  He was so willing, and she was so undeserving. The guilt gnawed at her like a mouse on a piece of cheese. Swallowing hard, she decided a quick, straightforward apology would be best. “I’m sorry about going off with Paul last night after we’d invited you to dinner.”

  He had his back turned to her so she couldn’t see his expression. “You don’t have to apologize. Those things happen.”

  She wrung her hands. “I felt like I needed to be with Paul. He was so excited to take me to dinner. I didn’t want to disappoint him.”

  He finally turned around and gave her a half smile. “You did what you thought was best. I trust your judgment.”

  “Did you like the chicken?”

  “Delicious.” His smile grew in strength. “Bitsy made two new dents in the floor with the meat cleaver and ordered me out of the house three times. I think I’m starting to make a gute impression.”

  Lily felt her shoulders relax even though she hadn’t realized she’d been tensing them. Dan seemed more disappointed than angry. A little flicker of pleasure leaped in her chest when she thought that Dan’s disappointment might have stemmed from the fact that she hadn’t been there.

  She adored how good-natured he always was.

  She caught her breath as something wide and deep opened up inside her.

  She didn’t adore just that one thing about Dan Kanagy. She adored most everything about him. His joy, his thoughtfulness, his unbridled enthusiasm, and his shameless compliments. She loved the way he teased Aunt B and got under Poppy’s skin and inspired Rose to say more than three words at a time.

  Did that mean she liked him?

  Of course she liked him. Who wouldn’t like such an endearing smile?

  Well, Paul wouldn’t.

  She shouldn’t like anyone besides Paul in that way, should she? She and Paul weren’t engaged yet, but didn’t her sense of loyalty demand that her heart be locked away for him and only him? She cleared her throat. These feelings for Dan Kanagy were unexpected and disconcerting, but of course her heart was locked away for Paul. He had been her first and only love.

  That didn’t mean she couldn’t be friends with Dan. Good friends. Close friends.

  She took a deep breath. What would Paul think? He told her to forgive but never forget. Was she being foolish to let down her guard?

  It was too late. Her guard had fallen from the tower and drowned in the lake. She hoped she wouldn’t regret it.

  Dan pulled knives, forks, and spoons from the silverware drawer. “Did you eat a roll for me?”

  Her head spun with questions. She had to concentrate on his face to make any sense of his words. “What?”

  “At Paul’s restaurant. You said you’d eat a roll for me.”

  Ah, yes. The restaurant. “I ate a roll and a chicken pot pie in your honor.”

  That was all she had eaten. Paul had only offered to pay because he knew she wouldn’t be persuaded to come unless he did, but she had known better than to strain his generosity. Chicken pot pie was the cheapest thing on the menu, and he had still been grumpy about having to pay for it.

  “What kind of dessert did you pick? Dat says their seven-layer chocolate cake is so rich, it could put you in the hospital.”

  Lily used the excuse of grabbing a handful of napkins to turn her back on him so he wouldn’t be able to see her face. “I didn’t have dessert.”

  “Too full?”

  She didn’t want to lie, but something told her Dan wouldn’t like the real reason she didn’t order dessert. She lowered her head and concentrated on straightening the napkins into a nice neat pile. “I just didn’t have any.”

  All movement on his side of the room ceased. She didn’t dare look up for fear he’d see the hesitation in her eyes.

  “Lily,” he said, in a tone he might have used to coax Rose out of her shell. “Why didn’t you have any dessert?”

  “It doesn’t matter.”

  “It matters very much to me.”

  Oh, sis yuscht. The compassion in his voice made her want to bare her soul. How did he do that?

  She couldn’t look at him, but she tried to sound flippant as she folded and unfolded the flimsy paper napkins. “It was nothing. I knew Paul would be annoyed if I got dessert. He doesn’t like to spend the money.”

  “But he promised,” Dan murmured softly, the incredulity evident in his voice.

  Lily looked up, forced a smile, and fanned the air nonchalantly with her paper napkins. “I know, but he still would have been mad about it. He’s funny like that sometimes.”

  Dan came around the island, took the napkins from her hand, and laid them on the counter. She couldn’t read the dark expression in his eyes as he gently grasped her upper arms with his rough, warm fingers. Tugging her a little closer to him, he asked, “How long has it been this bad?”

  “How long?” she replied in a barely audible whisper.

  “When did it get this bad with Paul?”

  Her eyes inexplicably stung with tears. How could a little compassion undo her like that? Blinking quickly, she shoved all that emotion deeper inside herself and forced a smile onto her lips. “It isn’t. I mean, it’s nothing. We disag
ree sometimes, that’s all. All couples have disagreements.”

  A spark of fire leapt into his eyes. “Disagreements? Lily, you’re afraid to cough without Paul’s permission.”

  With great effort, she lifted her chin and pulled herself away from his grasp. “What do you know about me and Paul?” She wanted to sound strong, indignant. She managed to sound pathetic.

  The fire flared in his gaze, and he looked almost angry. She had never seen Dan angry before. “You don’t smile when you’re with him, he rarely has a kind word for you, and he gives you orders and you obey.”

  “He gives me orders?”

  “He insisted you give those books back. He made you put on your glasses last night.”

  Her heart shrank to the size of a cold, hard pebble as doubt and embarrassment pressed her into the floor. “That’s . . . that’s what you do in a relationship. You try to please each other. Paul likes it when I wear glasses. I care for him, so I try to make him happy.”

  “Does Paul ever try to make you happy?” Dan said, the tension evident beneath his quiet words.

  “Of course he does. Paul was kind to me when no one else was.”

  Dan’s agitation grew with every word that came out of Lily’s mouth. He scrubbed his fingers through his hair. “Lily, he was nice to you in eighth grade. I don’t see it anymore.”

  How could someone like Dan Kanagy hope to understand what Paul’s kindness meant to her? “Well, I guess you won’t see what you don’t want to see.”

  “What I don’t want to see?” He spread his arms wide. “All I’ve ever wanted is to see you happy.”

  What a lie. All Dan Kanagy had wanted to do was put her down, to remind her how small and insignificant she was compared to him. “I’ve learned to appreciate Paul for who he is, and he likes me the way I am. He doesn’t care that I’m not pretty or smart. Other boys aren’t so tolerant.”

  She might as well have insulted his entire family. She could see the muscles of his jaw twitch as he balled his hands into fists. “You act as if you don’t think you deserve any better, Amtrak.”

  Lily recoiled as if he had struck her. That one word spoke volumes. She couldn’t breathe properly anymore. That was what Dan truly thought of her. To him, she would always be the homely, pathetic fourteen-year-old. The easy target of his cruel wit. The butt of every joke.