“Ready to work your ass off?” he asked.
“Always,” I said.
My new trainer’s name was Randy Coleman. The guy was big as a bull and still built for a man in his late forties. His head was shaved clean but he had a full beard that was still black and long. Tattoos circled his arms, and I could see them on his chest under his tank top.
“Let’s start you on the bag,” he said.
We walked over to a punching bag. My trainer put me through my paces, asking to see my punches and kicks. I knew that I was slower than usual. I could see Randy gauging me with every move I made.
“You got some skills, but I can tell you aren’t at your peak. I saw the championship fight in Brazil. You were fucking amazing. That was only two and a half weeks ago. What’s up man?”
“Don’t worry about it. I had some personal stuff. Was hitting the bottle more than the gym. But I’ll be here twenty-four seven until I get to the top of my game.”
“I scheduled you for a match in two weeks. Don’t disappoint me.”
“You won’t be disappointed.”
I spent the next forty-five minutes doing weighted sprints back and forth across the gym. I was sweating bullets, but it felt good to be back in training. After a short break and some water, Randy came over to me where I was sitting on a bench at the edge of the gym.
“I want you to spar with one of my other heavyweight fighters,” he said. “This guy has been picking up titles all over the West Coast. I’d like to gauge where you two are in my lineup.”
I looked up at the ring and saw a kid who couldn’t be more than twenty-two, all pumped up and cocky as shit. I wasn’t going to let this little asshole show me up in front of Randy on my first day at the gym.
“Let’s do this,” I said, pulling on my gloves.
I climbed into the ring across from the kid. He smiled at me through his teeth guard. I bounced on the balls of my feet and rolled my shoulders, getting ready to feel the crack of this kid’s bones under my fist. He was my teammate and this was only a sparring match, so I couldn’t pummel his ass into the ground. It had been so long since I’d been in a fight, every muscle in my body was screaming to release its power right into this kid’s face.
Randy rang the bell, and the kid and I circled each other, gauging each other’s movements. He burst toward me, trying to overwhelm me with his speed. I sidestepped and swiveled around, kicking back at him as I turned. My foot connected with his hip, and he staggered backwards. That didn’t keep him from catching my foot in his hands and twisting it, forcing me to the ground.
Hell no.
I sprang to my feet and charged at him, engaging him like a boxer. He swung over my left shoulder, and I hit him with a brutal undercut right in the ribs. We were locked together and he took a swing at my face. I swept my feet under his before his fist connected, and he fell on his ass on the mat. I took the opportunity to slam down on him with my elbow, connecting with his chest.
He let out loud groan, but locked my neck in his arms and twisted me over onto my back. It happened so suddenly, I had no idea I was pinned until I was staring up at the ceiling. I used every bit of my strength to try to get out of his hold, but he was squeezing my neck and pushing his knee into my chest. I knew if I didn’t tap out I’d go unconscious from lack of air as he squeezed my windpipe.
Fuck.
With no other options, I smacked my hand to the mat, indicating that I was tapping out. I’d lost. I’d fucking conceded to this kid.
Bullshit.
Chapter Twelve
As the week progressed, I started getting more used to the long hours at the hospital. Even with the knowledge that there was a child growing inside me and the intermittent bouts of morning sickness, I was adapting to the new schedule. The dizziness had mostly subsided, and I could trust myself with my patients again. My attending physician and the chief of surgery were both happy with my performance and punctuality.
I wasn’t going to let any of my personal issues get in the way of my lifelong dream. I still had some time to figure out what I was going do about the baby. The longer I waited, I knew I was only putting off the inevitable. The fact that I hadn’t marched right down to the OB/GYN and had a prescription for a pill or a quick surgical abortion told me what I really wanted was to keep it.
Perhaps Crash was an idiot, an asshole, a man-child who just wanted to play with his toys, but the night of passion we’d shared had been real. If a child had to be conceived in this completely inappropriate point in my life, at least it had been created during a moment of surrender and ecstasy.
That didn’t mean that I could tell Crash about it. If I was going to keep the baby, I would have to find some other excuse for its existence. I had to have some story to tell my mother and Don and everybody else that I knew. I would figure out how to care for the child when it arrived. I would figure out how to deal with my work schedule.
The moment I began to show, everybody would start asking me who the father was. That was the first thing I needed to consider. Should I tell them it was a one-night stand? I didn’t like the idea of that any more than I liked the idea of telling the truth.
As I was getting off my shift in the late evening, I saw a familiar face walk down the hall towards the pharmaceutical buyer’s office.
“Hello, gorgeous,” Jeremy said, stopping me in the hallway.
“Hi, Jeremy,” I said.
“You told me to ask you out later. What about tonight?”
“Tonight?”
I was going to brush him off, but then a lightbulb burst in my brain. The idea of going out with Jeremy, doing the dirty, and then telling everybody that he was my kid’s dad turned my stomach. But at least he was someone that my mom knew. All my friends knew him. My mom liked him. He was a man with a good job. He was the right kind of guy to be a father. Even though I didn’t want anything to do with him.
“Yeah, tonight. Why not?”
“Okay, sure.” I cringed inwardly, just thinking about going out with him. But if I was going to tell people that he was the baby’s father, I’d have to really sell it. I’d have to sleep with him. I thought I would throw up from the idea. Part of me felt like just considering it would be cheating on Crash. That was crazy. Crash and I were not together. We would never be together. It was impossible. And even if it was possible…
“I’ll just go get changed. We can go now, if you’re ready.”
“Absolutely. You go get dolled up, and I’ll meet you out in the waiting room.”
I gave him a fake smile, but I shuddered as I walked away. This was all probably a huge mistake. I didn’t want to have sex with Jeremy. I didn’t even want to go out with him. I never wanted to see the asshole again. But what other choice did I have? I could never tell anyone who the real father was.
I went into the locker room and quickly changed into my street clothes. I hadn’t worn anything spectacular to the hospital that morning. Just a pair of skinny jeans and knee-high black boots with a burgundy colored sweater. But it was nice enough for going out to dinner. I fixed my makeup and my hair, grabbed my bag, and walked out to the waiting room.
Jeremy was sitting there with his briefcase, looking as smarmy and self-satisfied as ever. He grinned up at me and stood. I could smell the overwhelming scent of his cologne. I never liked that smell, and now that I knew what kind of man he really was, I liked it even less. It just reminded me of his egocentric, misogynistic bullshit.
Maybe I should find somebody else to pretend to be the dad. If I told Jeremy that my kid was his, he’d probably try to take custody. But I had agreed to go out on the date. I had to go through with it.
We chatted for a moment about what we wanted to eat and settled on Chinese. I followed him out to the car and slid into the passenger seat of his black SUV. It smelled even more strongly of his cologne, and it made my stomach turn. I tried to pretend that everything was cool, even though inside my head I was screaming at myself.
“I know this gre
at little place on Ventura,” he said.
“Do you want to drive all the way out there? I have my car here.”
“I can drive you back,” he said as he pulled out of the parking lot.
I didn’t want to be trapped with him with no transportation or means of escape, but it was too late now. We drove from Malibu into downtown Los Angeles and parked in a multilevel parking structure. As we walked to the restaurant, Jeremy continued talking about his work with the local hospitals. He bragged about how much he was going to make this year and the house he just put a down payment on.
“All that’s missing now is a family to put in it,” he said.
I didn’t respond as he opened the door for me to walk into the restaurant. The waiter seated us at a table by the window and handed us menus. I settled on Mongolian beef and Jeremy ordered sweet-and-sour chicken. I gazed out the window after the waiter took our menus and our order and walked away.
“I’ve missed you so much,” he said. “I’m so glad you reconsidered.”
“Reconsidered?” Did he really believe that me going out to dinner with him meant that we were back in a relationship?
“It’s so good to be together again,” he said. “We can get our lives back on schedule now.”
“Right,” I said noncommittally. I just needed to get through the evening. Sitting there at the table, looking at his rat-like face, made me realize how stupid this whole idea had been from the beginning. I never should have gone out with him. There’s no way I could let him put his dick inside me. I’d have to come up with some other plan. Some other excuse for why I was pregnant.
“Are you still staying with Ava and Mia in that rental house?” he asked.
The waiter set our meals down in front of us, and I grabbed a piece of spicy beef with my chopsticks.
“I’m living with my mom and her fiancé right now in a mansion in Malibu. It has its own private beach. It’s pretty fantastic actually.”
“Wow. That sounds nice.” He shoved a piece of chicken in his mouth and chewed audibly. I always hated listening to him chew.
“It is,” I said, lifting my glass of ice water to my lips. This night couldn’t be over soon enough.
“Because I was thinking, now that we’re back together, you could move in with me.”
I choked on my water and dropped my chopsticks on my plate. I started coughing and gagging. What the hell did he think was happening here? Even if I had been serious about going out to dinner with him, asking me to move in with him after we’d been broken up for two months was moving ridiculously fast.
“You’re kidding right?” I said, once I finally stopped coughing.
“You know we are perfect for each other, babe,” he said.
“I think you’re presuming too much here, Jeremy.”
“You agreed to go out with me. Why the hell did you agree if you weren’t ready to move to the next level?”
“Can we just finish our dinner? I’ve been working for the last sixteen hours. I can’t deal with any personal life drama right now. I thought you were asking me out as an old friend, not because you wanted me to move in with you. Just have a little bit of understanding for a minute and let me eat my dinner. If it will make you feel better, I’ll pay for my meal. In fact, I’ll pay for your meal, too.”
“That won’t be necessary,” he grumbled. I could tell he was simmering with anger. The anger of a man who just wanted to control and dominate a woman to make himself feel more like a man.
We finished eating in relative silence, and he insisted on paying the bill when it came. He left a minuscule tip, and I secretly threw a few more dollars onto the table behind his back. We walked out to the car, and he practically ignored me. The thought of driving back to the hospital with this mood between us was making me feel more uncomfortable by the minute.
“Why don’t I just get a cab back to the hospital?” I said, stopping on the sidewalk under the swaying palm trees.
“No way. I asked you out. I can’t let you pay for a cab just to get back to your car.”
“Well, you’re obviously upset. I don’t think I can deal with that right now.”
“I’m not upset,” he lied. “I can wait for you. I know you’ll come around.”
“Why me, Jeremy?” I asked.
“Because you’re the one for me,” he said. The words sounded nice, but I knew there was something else behind it. Maybe it was because I was at the top of my class and had the promise of an excellent career. For a man like Jeremy, being able to control a woman who had potential was even more satisfying than controlling a woman who had little to offer the world.
“Thanks, I guess,” I said.
We made it back to the car and drove across town to the hospital where my car was parked. Fatigue was already overtaking my brain, and I knew I needed to get home and go to sleep ASAP. I climbed out of his car in the dim glow of streetlamps over the parking lot.
“Love you,” he said just before I closed my door. I didn’t say anything back. I just turned to my car and unlocked the driver’s side door. What had I just gotten myself into? Now he was going to think that I had opened the door for him to continue pursuing me. This wasn’t going to make the lie I had to tell any easier.
As soon as I made it home that night, I passed out in my bed. I woke up the next morning groggy as hell, glad that I had a few days off work. I had promised my mom that I would help her with the wedding arrangements. The wedding was only a few weeks away and it all had to be organized quickly. Luckily, Don had the money to pay for that kind of expediency.
After I’d gotten ready for the morning, I met my mom in the living room where she had a bunch of bride’s magazines spread out across the coffee table.
“Oh, honey, I’m so glad you’re up. I really need your help.” My mother had only been working part-time hours at her practice since Don had asked her to marry him. Since Don was semi-retired himself, the two of them spent most of their time lounging around the house, reading, and making googly eyes at each other. Today was a rare occasion when Don was not around, but my mother was. We hadn’t really spent any time alone since I’d gotten back from Brazil weeks ago.
“It’s a choice between these three dresses. I’m having them shipped in from the designers and a personal tailor will adjust them for me when they arrive.”
“You need three dresses?”
“Of course not,” she said. “But Don insisted that I get the best of the best for our wedding day. I don’t want to disappoint him.”
Part of me thought that this money was going to my mother’s head. I really couldn’t blame her. She’d worked all of her life to take care of me, with no help from my father. She deserved a little spoiling at this point in her life.
I sat down on the couch beside her and looked at the pictures of the dresses the designers had sent over. They were names I recognized from the haute couture fashion runways. I pointed to one that looked like it would complement her figure the most.
“I like this one,” I said.
“Well, I won’t really know until they arrive, but I agree with you. I was leaning towards the handmade lace bodice with the mermaid skirt.”
“It’s going to look really pretty on you,” I said, pulling my legs up under me on the couch. It felt good to just sit down for once with my mom in this comfortable, luxurious room. I could feel my whole body start to relax as I looked at the pretty things she showed me.
We went through the choices for all of the accoutrements she would need for her wedding. Yellow and pink flowers. Steak and salmon. A live band who was so famous it would cost a fortune to book them. Place settings. And finally seating arrangements.
“I know this is not traditional, but I was hoping that you would be my maid of honor,” she said, patting my hand.
“Mom, that’s so sweet,” I said, feeling myself starting to choke up. The pregnancy hormones were really getting to me. I usually wasn’t so emotional, but I felt a tear form in the corner of my eye. For
the first time in my life, my mom was going to be with someone new. I was happy for her, but at the same time, I was a little scared that I would lose her.
“Does that mean you’ll do it?”
“Of course I will.”
“Oh good. I know that Don is going to ask Crash to be his best man. Do you think he’ll do it?”
“I really don’t know. I don’t know Crash very well,” I lied. I knew Crash as intimately as any person could know someone else, even though we hadn’t spent much time together.
“I think he will. He seems like such a sweet boy,” Mom said.
I had to keep myself from snorting. Crash was anything but a sweet boy. But maybe through my mother’s eyes, he could be called that. I suddenly felt incredibly sad, and the tear that had been forming in my eye slid down my cheek. As distracted as my mother was with organizing the wedding, she noticed the tear.
“Honey? What’s wrong?”
I couldn’t tell her that I was several weeks pregnant with my soon-to-be stepbrother’s baby and that I had no idea what to tell anyone. Or that I was terrified she was making the biggest mistake of her life and that her love affair with Don would blow up in her face. Instead, I decided to tell her a half truth.
“It’s always been just you and me. Now you’re going to marry Don. Part of me feels like I’m losing you.”
My mother made a sympathetic noise and pulled me into her arms, patting my back and hair affectionately.
“Baby, you’re never going to lose me,” she said.
“I know, Mom. I just want you to be happy.”
Chapter Thirteen
I looked at myself in the mirror, wearing the slick tuxedo Don had bought for me for the wedding. I looked fucking awesome. I’d never worn a monkey-suit before, but now that I had one on, I had to admit it looked pretty damn good on me. I knew that Harper was going to be the maid-of-honor for her mother, and I had agreed to be Don’s best man.
I wondered what she would be wearing for the wedding. I hoped it was something low-cut that showed off her ass. Then again, it probably wouldn’t be appropriate for me to have a hard-on the entire wedding. With my training schedule taking up most of my time, I hadn’t had the chance to pick up any other women. The truth was, I hadn’t wanted to.
Crash: A Bad Boy MMA Romance Page 8
