Remember Texas

by Eve Gaddy

  “No reason you can’t change that. If you want. Your hours aren’t that bad now, are they?”

  “Well, no, but—”

  “So nothing’s stopping you. You could go after work tomorrow.”

  She stared at him a moment, then laughed. “You’re moving way too fast for me. I’ll think about it.” She tilted her head. “What is this, you’re a convert so now you’re trying to convert me? You just got them today. You don’t even know if you’re going to like them.”

  “Sure I do. Admit it, you’re tempted.” He stood and reached down to give her a hand up.

  She smiled, looking into his eyes. “You’re right. I am tempted. Very.”

  Their gazes locked. Her eyes were gorgeous, a deep ocean-blue a man could drown in. His gaze dropped to her mouth. Full, sexy…beyond tempting. How long had it been since he’d kissed a woman, held a woman in his arms? Since he’d made love to a woman?

  Too damn long.

  “Jack—”

  “I’m tempted, too,” he murmured and kissed her. For a moment she didn’t move, then imperceptibly, her lips parted. He took that as a good sign, and slipped his tongue over her lips, dipped it gently into her mouth. Her tongue flirted with his, then slid inside, tasting him as he tasted her. He dropped her hand and slid his arm behind her back, edging her closer.

  He wanted to plunge in. Devour. And knew if he did he’d lose any chance with her. One last taste, one last flick of his tongue in that soft, sweet mouth, and he pulled back.

  He thought she’d move away. Instead, she leaned forward, rose up on her toes and pressed her mouth to his again. He wasn’t stupid. He kissed her back and the kiss deepened, turned hotter. He felt her melt against him and had wild thoughts of boosting her onto the dryer, stepping between her legs and seeing what happened.

  Slow down, his conscious mind told him, but he really didn’t want to.

  Finally, when he was a heartbeat away from losing all caution, Ava drew back and stared at him, her eyes big, her mouth glistening. She started to speak but before she could, the kitchen door banged open.

  “Dad, are you here?”

  He dropped his arm, his gaze still on hers. “In here, Cole. I was introducing Dr. Vincent to the dogs.”

  “Sweet.” He came in, oblivious to the vibes and to the way both of them looked. “Have you taken them out?”

  “Sorry, haven’t gotten around to it. Why don’t you do that and I’ll walk Ava back to the party.”

  “I think they’re trying to get rid of everyone. Bye, Dr. Vincent. I’ll see you Tuesday.”

  “Won’t you be in tomorrow?”

  Cole grinned. “Dad’s taking me to get my license after school.”

  “Oh, that’s right, he said he was doing that. Sounds fun. I’ll see you Tuesday, then.”

  Neither spoke as they made their way back to Mark’s, but this time the silence wasn’t companionable. Tension stretched between them, a sexual awareness that seemed to grow with each passing moment.

  They found Mark and Cat and said their goodbyes, then Jack walked Ava to her car. Neither mentioned the kiss they’d shared, though he’d have bet it was on her mind as much as it was on his. He opened her door and she slid in.

  Leaning down he said, “How about that rain check?”

  “What rain check?”

  “When I asked you to dinner the other night and you couldn’t come. The night you went to Mark’s.”

  “I didn’t say I’d go out with you.”

  “You didn’t say you wouldn’t, either.”

  Hesitant, she looked at him. “I like you, Jack.”

  “I like you, too. That’s why I asked you to dinner. So what’s the problem?”

  “I’m not—I don’t want to give you the wrong impression.”

  “Meaning what?”

  “Meaning I don’t think we should date.”

  “Why?”

  She worried her lip before answering. “I’m a little burned out on relationships.”

  “Because of your divorce.”

  She nodded.

  “And if I said it was just dinner between friends?”

  She gazed at him a moment, then said, “Is that all you want?”

  Lie or the truth? Since he’d just kissed her like there was no tomorrow, she’d see right through the lie. “No, but if that’s all you’re up for then I’m willing to go along with you.” And try like hell to change her mind. He gave her his most winning smile. “Come on, Ava. What can it hurt? Tuesday, after work. I’ll pick you up and we’ll go over to Corpus Christi. It’ll be fun.”

  “I don’t know.” She tapped her fingers on the steering wheel. “I suppose dinner wouldn’t hurt.”

  “Don’t look so apprehensive. You might even enjoy it.”

  “That’s exactly what I’m afraid of,” she said, and started the car.

  CHAPTER TWELVE

  “YOU’RE PLAYING WITH FIRE,” Ava told herself Tuesday. She had no business making a date with Jack, even for something as innocent as a quick dinner after work.

  That kiss they’d shared in his laundry room sure hadn’t been innocent. She’d been a nanosecond away from losing whatever sense she had. Much more of that and she’d have found herself in his bed. All this, and it was only the first time he’d kissed her. Oh, Lord, she could be in big trouble here. She couldn’t date, couldn’t have a serious relationship. Her failed marriage should have proved that to her. That and the pitifully few relationships she’d attempted since then had proved it to her.

  But she liked Jack. And she wanted to get to know him. She wanted… No, she wouldn’t think about sex or how long it had been since she’d been with anyone.

  She’d gone out on the bay with Jack again Monday. If anything, getting to know him better was only making him more appealing. None of that mattered, though. She had to nip this relationship in the bud. Make it clear they were friends and nothing more. He’d agreed to honor her wishes, but still… He’d admitted he wanted more. And damn it, so did she.

  He was the first man she’d been really interested in since, well, she couldn’t remember the last man. The first man who’d made her feel alive in years.

  The phone rang as she was headed out the door, already late for work. Checking caller ID, she saw it was Mark so she picked up. “Hi, there.”

  “Hey, Ava. It’s Mark. Do you have lunch plans today? Around noon?”

  She felt a funny little thrill that she had family now. Family who cared enough to call. Her life right now was one new experience after the other. “No. Why, did you want to meet for lunch?”

  “Yeah. How about the Scarlet Parrot?”

  He sounded odd. Or was it just her, reading something into a simple invitation? She was so new to this, she didn’t know. “All right.” She hesitated, then asked, “Did you want to talk about something specific?”

  “Why do you ask that?”

  “I don’t know. You sound sort of funny.”

  “Just meet me. We’ll talk at lunch,” he said, and hung up before she could get another word in.

  “That was weird,” she said, and replaced the handset on the charger.

  Fortunately, she was busy most of the morning so she didn’t have much time to brood over what was up with Mark or why she’d let Jack Williams affect her so strongly. It annoyed her, though, that what little free time she had she spent daydreaming about Jack. What was it about him?

  Her phone rang and she snatched it up thankfully. “Ava Vincent.”

  “Brian Kincaid,” he said with a laugh in his voice.

  Brian. Oh, Lord, her heart nearly stalled. “Brian. Hi,” she said, as if she’d talked to him last week instead of years ago. “Mark said you were going to call.”

  “Sorry it’s taken me so long, but I’ve been out of pocket.”

  “That’s all right. After all, it took me more than twenty years, so who am I to complain.”

  He laughed again and she knew they were going to get along. They wound up talkin
g for more than half an hour. He was still in China, so she knew the call was costing him a small fortune, but he insisted it wasn’t a problem.

  Talking to him wasn’t nearly as uncomfortable as she’d expected. Brian seemed to be even more easygoing than Jay was. Of course, he’d been even younger than Jay when she left, so he didn’t have many memories of her. Or maybe that was just his nature. She got the impression he didn’t take a lot of things seriously.

  By the time she met Mark she was very curious about what he wanted. They made small talk until they ordered. He pulled out two pictures drawn with crayon and handed them to her with a proud grin. “Max made me promise to bring them to you.”

  Her heart melted. She couldn’t tell what they were supposed to be but he was only five, after all. “They’re beautiful. Thank you. I’ll hang them on my refrigerator.” Another first. A picture from her nephew.

  “That one’s Buddy,” Mark said, referring to his wife’s parrot. “At least, I think it is. The other one is an elephant. He saw it at the zoo last Saturday.”

  She held both pictures up and studied them. “They’re the same size. And the same color.”

  “Yeah, welcome to Max’s world.” He looked at them again and added, “Well, Buddy is gray.”

  She laughed and set them aside where they wouldn’t get dirty. After their drinks arrived Ava sweetened her tea and waited for Mark to broach whatever he had to tell her, but he had fallen silent, tapping his fingers on the table. Exasperated, she finally said, “Okay, what is it? If I didn’t know better I’d think you were nervous.”

  He grimaced. “It shows, huh?”

  “What is it, Mark? What’s wrong?”

  “It’s about Mom.” He held up a hand. “Just let me talk before you freak out.”

  “I’m not changing my mind, if that’s what you’re asking. I won’t see her.” Hadn’t she made herself clear? How many times was he going to ask her the same question?

  “She’s coming to town next weekend. She wants to see you so badly she would do anything to make that happen. Can’t you put aside your bitterness enough to just see her? Even for a little while?”

  “No.” She put her hand on his arm, keeping it there until he looked at her. “I can’t do it, Mark.”

  “You think I don’t understand, but I do. I was the same way. She finally came to see me and told me the whole story. We worked through it, and believe me there was a lot to work through.”

  “The fact that you made up with her, that you forgave her has nothing to do with me. I haven’t changed my mind. I don’t believe she’s any different than the self-centered woman I remember.”

  “You’re wrong. I didn’t believe it either, but she is different. She’s loving and involved and…she cares, Ava. She cares a lot.”

  Pointedly Ava turned away, saying nothing.

  “You’re not the only one who went through hell, you know. So did she.”

  Ava stared at him. “You have no idea what I went through. No idea what my life was like. So don’t tell me a sob story about our mother and expect me to buy it.”

  For a moment the tension was so thick you couldn’t have cut it with a machete. Then before her astounded gaze, Mark started laughing.

  “What? What in the world do you find funny?”

  “You sound exactly like I did the first time Jay tried to get me to see Mom again. Exactly.”

  But Mark hadn’t done what she had. He’d been honest and honorable, he’d taken care of his brothers when he was little more than a child himself. He hadn’t left everyone to fend for themselves, like she had, like her mother had. He wasn’t like her. And he wouldn’t believe her even if she told him the truth about herself.

  “Give Mom a chance,” he said softly. “That’s all I’m asking.”

  “Because I owe it to her? She’s my mother, so I owe it to her?”

  “You owe it to yourself. And yeah, you owe it to her. Bottom line is, she’s our mother. She did the best she could under the circumstances.”

  Her best hadn’t been good enough. But Ava knew better than to say that. “I’ll think about it,” she finally said. “But I want to get something straight. Whatever I decide, even if I decide I can’t see her, you have to promise me you won’t do this again. You have to accept my decision, and respect it.”

  The waitress arrived with their food and chatted with Mark a moment, then left them to their meal. She watched him start to eat, realizing he’d never answered her.

  “Promise me, Mark.”

  “All right,” he said reluctantly. “I promise I’ll respect your decision, even if I think you’re wrong. But you have to promise me you’ll think about what I’m asking, not as a child but as an adult.”

  “What’s that supposed to mean? Are you implying I’m being immature?”

  “I’m not implying anything. I’m flat out telling you I think you’re reacting as a child would react and not a grown woman.”

  Ava couldn’t think of a thing to say.

  “Don’t you think Mom regrets what happened? Don’t you think she regrets losing you?”

  “I have no idea. I haven’t seen the woman in over twenty years. But the woman I remember was too caught up in her causes and her own feelings to care about her children. She left me with him, Mark. She let him do whatever he wanted and didn’t even attempt to protect us.”

  “You can’t know that. We don’t know what she said to him when we weren’t around. Or what she tried to do to make things better for us. We don’t know everything she endured from him, and we never will. She won’t discuss it.”

  “It doesn’t matter, does it? She failed us. Every one of us.”

  “Haven’t you ever done anything you’ve regretted? Something you’d give anything to never have done or said?”

  She closed her eyes as that shot went home. If he only knew. Forcing herself to remain calm, she looked at her older brother. “I said I’d think about it. Can we just drop this subject now?”

  He grimaced but he didn’t say any more about it. They ate in silence for a moment, then he said, “Has Brian called you? I finally talked to him this morning and he said he was going to call you.”

  “He did. It was…nice. Sort of strange, but nice.”

  “None of us see him very much since he took this job. I’m proud of him, but I wish he’d make it back to the States more often.”

  “You must miss him.”

  “Yeah, I do. But he seems happy jetting around the world and doing—” he waved a hand “—whatever it is he does.”

  “You’re happy, too. You always wanted to work for the Fish and Wildlife Service. Cat said you used to work undercover busting animal smugglers but that you transferred to the office here when you married.”

  “Yeah. Undercover work’s a little too dangerous when you’ve got a wife and kids. Plus you have to move around too much. But I like what I’m doing now.”

  “It’s obvious you’re crazy about them. Your family.”

  “They’re the best,” he said simply.

  “You’re lucky to have them.”

  “Believe me, I know that. Which brings me to my next question. Why aren’t you married with some rug rats of your own?”

  Her heart sank. She’d been expecting the question, if not from Mark, from Jay. “I was married once, a long time ago. It didn’t work out. And children…they just didn’t happen.” And never would.

  “You’re still young enough to fall in love again. Get married again,” Mark said. “It’s not too late.”

  “Yes, it is. I’ll never marry again.” She clasped her hands together in her lap and made herself continue. “I…I can’t have children.”

  He put his fork down. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to be insensitive. Cat tells me I have no tact.”

  She smiled faintly. “That’s all right. There’s no way you could have known. But let’s talk about something else.” Please, God, anything else.

  “Suits me.” He ate another bite, then s
aid, “I saw you go off with Jack at the barbecue. He’s a good guy.”

  Okay, anything but Jack. “Yes, he is. But nothing’s going on between us.” Just a kiss I can’t forget. Which was why she was going to break that date as soon as she got back to work. He was too dangerous to her peace of mind. “And nothing’s going to go on, either, so forget about playing matchmaker.”

  Mark raised an eyebrow and smiled at her. “I never said I was. And speak of the devil.” He waved and a few seconds later Jack strolled up to their table.

  “Hello, Ava. Mark,” he said, shaking hands.

  “Join us?” Mark asked.

  “Thanks, but I’m picking up a to-go order. I’m taking Dr. Long out on the bay this afternoon. Command performance. He’s got someone he’s hitting up for funds going along, too.” He looked at Ava. “We won’t be late, though. I can still make dinner.”

  Conscious of Mark’s very interested gaze, she stammered, “I—I meant to call you. Something’s come up and I won’t be able to make it.”

  He looked a little surprised. “Okay. Want to try for tomorrow instead?”

  “Um, I don’t know about tomorrow. Can we talk about this later?”

  He looked at her for a long moment and she could tell exactly what he was thinking. She bet Mark could, too. He thought she was hedging and meant to break the date but was too chicken to come right out and say it. Which she was.

  “Yeah, sure. See you around.” He turned his back and went to the bar to pick up his order.

  “Why did you do that?” Mark asked her. “Why did you break your date with him?”

  She huffed out a breath, knowing she couldn’t avoid answering. “He caught me at a weak moment and I agreed to go out with him. I’ve thought it over and decided it’s not a wise move.”

  “Why?”

  “Because it’s not. I’m not interested in dating, and it’s not fair to him to let him think I am.” He was too tempting and she liked him too much for her own comfort. There was no point in going out with a man she really liked when she knew it would never work out between them. It wouldn’t be fair to either of them.

  “I don’t get you. Jack’s as nice a guy as you’ll ever meet. Why won’t you go out with him?”