Bad For Me (My Forbidden Rockstar)

by Bowman, Dara

I imagine Annie caressing me, sucking me, licking me, and when I come hard, it’s Annie’s name I want to scream. I bite my tongue, and fist my hands in Brittany’s hair.

  Once I’m finished, I quickly zip myself up, and move back towards the door.

  Brittany tipsily gets to her feet and stumbles; I reach out swiftly to catch her.

  “You know,” she slurs, looking up at me. “Roberto isn’t home tonight. I don’t have to go home.”

  There’s no way in hell Brittany is staying over.

  “Well, I have to get up early for rehearsal, so I’m going to have to send you home.”

  “You’re going to make me walk all the way home by myself?”

  Fuck. Her car isn’t here. Did the drunk bitch teeter all the way over here?

  I snatch my keys back up, and swing the door open.

  “Get in the fucking car,” I hiss.

  Brittany smiles indulgently as she climbs in.

  I tear down the driveway and drive past four sprawling lawns, before I pull up to Brittany and Roberto’s house. I look over and see Brittany’s mini skirt hiked around her waist, her legs splayed open on the passenger seat, and she’s rubbing herself between her thighs.

  “What the fuck?” I yell.

  “I’m just thinking about you,” she moans.

  This is too fucking much. There’s nothing more annoying than a drunk piece of ass who won’t leave me alone.

  “I’m done with this shit, Brittany. I’m serious. Don’t call me again.”

  “Asshole,” she accuses.

  I jump out of the car and wrench the passenger door open.

  “Whatever. Just leave me the fuck alone.”

  Brittany trips out of the car, and heads straight for her door, but not before turning around and fixing me with a piercing gaze.

  “You think you’re so fucking special because you’re Dom Dresden,” she says, her voice dripping with contempt. “The only reason I come over to your house is so I can say I sucked off a rock star. You’re nothing else,” she scathes.

  “Yeah, yeah, yeah. You just wanted my big rock star dick. Shut the fuck up and go to bed.” I tell her, “And have a nice fucking life.”

  I’ve pissed her off and I can see the fire in her eyes.

  “Fuck you Dom!” she screams, her eyes wild.

  Right. Like I haven’t heard that line before.

  I shake my head as I drive off, watching in my rear view mirror to make sure Brittany disappears into her house for good.

  * * *

  The next day at rehearsal is fucking nuts because it’s the last day before we move on to the Honda Center. I barely get to say two words to Annie the entire day. She’s dressed in a little black dress with black booties, and her hair is piled on top of her head in that trademark messy style she seems to love. Even though she has circles under her eyes from our late night, she still looks hot.

  I try not to think about the Brittany incident but it’s gnawing at me. I’m disgusted with myself because of how I acted and I don’t like this new feeling…I’ve never had this problem before. I don’t usually regret my choices or second guess myself.

  I never should have let Brittany in my house, and now I hope I don’t have to pay for the fallout. I hope she was too drunk to remember what happened or what was said.

  Before we know it Thursday rolls around, and everything is officially a fucking madhouse. We’ve turned the Honda Center upside down, and our people are everywhere; roadies, stage crew, lighting guys, and set designers. The stage looks sick, and I love the concept. I already feel that raw urge building up in me to get on stage and let it all out.

  Not before long, we’re ready to run the sound check from the top, and I can tell the guys are just as juiced as I am.

  “This is the shit,” Johnny says, as he takes his place on the stage after our opening act finishes up.

  “I know, right?” Jenner says excitedly. We can all feel it. That crazy energy you get when you know you’re about to start something really big. This concert is going to be unlike anything we’ve done before. The pyrotechnics alone are insane.

  We start rehearsing, and every now and again I steal a glance at Annie in the background, shaking her ass dressed in the little black numbers the girls wear. I love watching her strut around in her little black heels. When she starts singing her featured song, it takes everything inside me not to blatantly stare. She's a fucking angel.

  It's funny how pissed Mel is about the whole situation, we can all practically smell her jealousy.

  When the rehearsal wraps, everybody claps, and people swarm the stage. Richard is talking, and crew guys are tugging at wires, and pulling on set pieces. I want to find Annie, but I have to speak to people. She gives me a long look before she disappears off the stage. Damn, I know she wants to talk to me too, I just need to get her alone.

  When I’m finally finished bullshitting with the technical talk, I rush back to the dressing rooms in search of Annie. Unfortunately Liz is the only one there.

  “Do you know where Annie is?” I ask.

  She gives me a wistful look. “She left about twenty minutes ago.” She pauses for a moment, “She was looking for every reason to stay though. She must have put her stuff in her bag and taken it back out again about fifteen times.”

  Damn! I made her wait too long, fucking Richard strikes again.

  “Thanks.” I say.

  The one stupid fucking thing I haven’t managed to do is get Annie’s phone number. I’m sure I can call my mom and get it from her or Cliff, but I really don’t feel like having a conversation with my mom about Annie. I do know where Annie lives though.

  I quickly run to the stage to find Richard, luckily he's still there arguing with one of the sound techs.

  “Are we done for the day?” I ask.

  Richard gives me a strange look. “Yeah, but tomorrow’s going to be a long day.” He says.

  “That’s fine. I’m heading out then.”

  I wave over to the guys.

  “Pussy-whipped!” Jenner screams across the stage.

  I flip him off.

  Asshole.

  Chapter Thirteen

  Dom

  I hop in my car, and pull on to the highway. Maybe Annie will want to grab a quick bite to eat, that will give us a good excuse to hang out alone. I don’t know why I’m acting like this, but I do know that I need to talk to her. This shit is killing me, I've never had to jump through so many hoops for a girl before.

  I’m about halfway to Annie’s when my phone rings.

  It’s my mom.

  I sigh and answer.

  “Hey Mom.”

  “Dominic! Where are you?” Her voice isn’t right. Her usual smooth quality is gone, and instead she sounds frantic and rushed.

  “What’s wrong?”

  “It’s your – your father. He showed up here at Cliff’s house, and Cliff isn’t home. I got him to leave the house, but he won’t leave the driveway,” her voice shakes, “He’s still sitting outside in his car. I called the police but they haven't showed up yet.”

  I yank my steering wheel so hard to the left, that I nearly flip my car. Not giving a shit, I cut across three lanes of traffic, and make an illegal u-turn so that I’m heading in the opposite direction toward Cliff's.

  “Don’t fucking move!” I bark. “Lock the doors! I’ll be there in less than ten minutes!”

  I’ve only just passed the exit for Cliff’s house, and I speed like hell to reach it in record time. I can't even think straight as I drive, I'm so full of rage that I just begin to imagine all the ways that I’m going to kill my father.

  I tear up the driveway to Cliff’s house, and I see my father’s nondescript rental car behind the obnoxious fountain. I leap out of my car, and as I approach I can see the startled look on my Dad's face. I bang my fists on the hood of his car and pound on his windows.

  “Get out of the fucking car!” I scream.

  The color drains from his face and he holds his
hands up as if he hasn’t done anything wrong.

  I hate him so fucking much that I want to vomit. I hated him as a kid, and I hate him even more now. I can’t believe I was ever scared of this lousy excuse for a human being. Anger courses through my veins as I remember how he used to beat the shit out of my mother and me. When I was just a little kid, this pathetic coward used to make me so scared that I would piss my pants.

  “GET THE FUCK OUT OF THE CAR!”

  Out of the corner of my eye, I see my mom shaking in the doorway of the house.

  My dad slowly opens the door, his arms are still up in surrender. I don’t even give him a chance, and I grab him by his collar, yank him out of the car and toss him against the hood.

  “Dominic!” my mom screams.

  “Stay out of this, Mom!”

  I spin my father around so he’s looking at me, and I put my nose inches from his.

  “I thought I told you to stay the fuck away from my mother.”

  “I – I just wanted t-to see your mother.”

  “Why?” I snarl.

  But whatever reason my father has dies on his lips, he's too terrified to try to explain himself to me.

  “You jealous prick,” I spit, “Leave her the hell alone.”

  At that moment, Cliff’s car comes winding up the driveway.

  “Fuck.”

  “Is that him?!” My Dad rages.

  I knock him back down on the hood of the car. I feel satisfied as I hear the air rush of out of him and he starts sputtering and coughing. Cliff hurries over to me, and my mom comes running down the steps.

  “What the hell is going on?” Cliff yells.

  “Cliff!” my mom cries, trying to grab him.

  I put my hands up to try to stop Cliff, but he doesn’t care.

  “Who the hell is this?” He asks my mother, whose mascara is running down her cheeks. She can’t answer, so I do.

  “It my loser of a father,” I growl, “and the fucker is leaving now.”

  Using all my force, I grab my dad by his clothes, and throw him down hard on the ground by the driver side’s door.

  He howls with pain as he hits the asphalt.

  “What is he doing here?” Cliff asks angrily, he's torn between consoling my mom and getting answers. I can see a vein bulging in his head and his face looks way too purple.

  “Cliff, take it easy,” I say quietly, “I got this.”

  “I’ll kill you myself!” Cliff roars.

  Suddenly he lunges at my dad. I know I should probably stop Cliff but I can’t help wanting to see my dad get the shit kicked out of him a little more.

  “Cliff, don’t!” My mom screams, “He’s not worth it!”

  “The hell he isn’t!” Cliff cries as he kicks my dad in the stomach.

  Shit, I guess my mom did tell Cliff all about my father. Since I don’t want Cliff going to jail for assault and battery, I pull him off my father, but not before he gets another good kick in.

  “Thank you,” my dad pants.

  “I didn’t do it for you, you pathetic piece of shit. I did it for Cliff and my mom.”

  I look over at Cliff and see my mom trying to calm him down. He doesn’t look good, and a sheen of sweat glistens on his forehead. He’s loosening the collar of his shirt.

  “Get him inside,” I order my mom.

  She hurries Cliff into the house.

  My dad is scrambling into his car.

  “I mean it,” I threaten, “I will kill you the next time.”

  My dad nods, and I think he believes me this time. He starts his car and throws it into drive. I hurry over and grab a rock from the landscaping along the driveway. As my dad starts down the driveway, I lob the rock at the back of his car, and it smashes gloriously through his back window.

  The fucker deserves worse.

  He just keeps driving and once he's out onto the street, I turn to go back into the house.

  The scene inside the house is not good. Cliff is clutching his chest, his face a sickly shade of eggplant purple. My mom is trying to give him water, and she's mopping his head with a washcloth.

  “Christ!" I scream, "We need to get him to the hospital!”

  “I called 911!” She cries.

  “I’ll get us there faster,” I say, turning to go back outside.

  “Dominic, no! The paramedics are on the way.” She looks around wildly, as if she doesn’t know what to do next.

  “Annabelle,” Cliff gasps.

  “Call Annabelle,” my mom orders, “tell her to meet us at the hospital.”

  Screw that, I’ve seen the piece of crap she drives. Plus it doesn’t seem like the best time to ask for her phone number.

  “I’ll go get her myself!” I yell.

  I dash out the front door, hop into my SUV, and drive like a madman to Annie’s apartment. I take the steps two at a time up to her door and pound on it frantically.

  “Annie!” I yell. “Annie!”

  She pulls the door open, looking absolutely bewildered.

  “It’s your father,” I say, “We need to go. They're taking him to the hospital.”

  Her confused look turns into panic.

  “What!" She cries, "What's wrong?”

  “I’ll explain on the way. Let’s go!”

  She only takes a second to register what I’ve said and dashes into the hallway to grab her phone and purse.

  “Elle, I’ve got to go! It’s my dad!” she cries.

  We hurry down the stairs and rush to my car.

  I speed to the hospital, and on the way I try to give her as many details as possible. I try to leave out the part about my father showing up, but the story makes no sense otherwise, so I give up and give her as little information as possible to explain what he was doing there.

  “But why would my dad go after him like that?” She cries, wiping at the tears rolling down her cheeks.

  “Because my mom must have told him about what a low-life my father is,” I pause, and Annie looks at me expectantly, “And about how he used to beat the shit out of me and my mom.”

  “Oh God.” She says quietly.

  Her whole face has changed now, and I know if this were another time, she would tell me she’s sorry and ask if I wanted to talk about it. Instead, tears are streaming down her crumbled face again.

  “My father is so stupid! He has high blood pressure! What was he thinking?”

  I don’t know what to say.

  “It will be alright.” The words sound hollow, but I think that’s what people say when they try to console someone. I want to take her in my arms, and kiss her, and tell her that I’ll protect her, but I’m driving, and I know I can’t really protect her from this. There’s nothing I can do but try to get us to the hospital as fast as possible.

  I’m sweating and anxious, and I don't realize it until now but I'm really scared for Cliff. I breathe a sigh of relief as we near the entrance of the hospital.

  “Dom, I’m so glad you’re here with me,” she suddenly blurts out.

  She leans across the armrest and puts her head on my shoulder.

  “It’s alright,” I murmur, grabbing her hand in mine.

  Annie’s eyes are cast downwards, and suddenly I feel her stiffen. She reaches down to the floor to pick up something, and my stomach fucking drops when I see what’s in her hand.

  It’s a tiny piece of neon-orange silk. An expensive lace thong. Brittany’s lace thong, to be exact.

  “What the hell is this?” she whispers.

  I can hear the storm brewing behind her words.

  “It’s not what it looks like,” I begin.

  Stupid fucking Brittany! I forgot how the dumb cunt pulled her underwear off in the car before she began to play with herself. Why in fuck’s name did I ever agree to drive that slut home?

  “Right,” she says bitterly, “I’m sure it belongs to your mom.”

  “Honest, it’s not what you think, Annie,” I say desperately.

  “Be fucking straight with me, Do
m,” and her voice is shaking. “I was in this car forty-eight hours ago, and I can assure you there wasn’t a trashy thong balled up on the floor!”

  “Okay, okay. It belongs to my neighbor. She keeps coming on to me. She was in my driveway when I got home from our dinner, and she was drunk. I gave her a ride home because it was late and she had been drinking. She pulled them off in the car as she tried to seduce me.”

  That was all true.

  Annie’s eyes are narrowed to slits.

  “So, nothing happened?”

  Fuck.

  “Look, Annie-’’

  “Answer the damn question, Dom!” she screams.

  We’re pulling into the hospital now. I should lie to Annie. I’m so good at lying that it comes as second nature. One smooth sentence and this could all be water under the bridge.

  “She pulled her panties off in the car. She started to masturbate,” I say carefully.

  “Damn it, Dom! Did anything happen?”

  I wasn’t used to being grilled like this, and I snapped. It had been a long day, not to mention my father’s unannounced visit and Cliff’s medical emergency.

  “Okay, fine!” I yell. “I let her suck me off! Are you happy now? You got me hard,” I accuse, “And then I came home to find her at my house. I tried to send her home, but I’m a fucking guy, all right? It was an asshole move. I’m sorry!”

  The look on Annie’s face is worse than any insult she could sling at me. The crushing disappointment and hurt that I've caused her makes me sick to my stomach, and I can’t even look at her. The timing could not be worse.

  “So, it’s my fault?” she whispers, incredulously. “I give you blue balls, and so you have to have some whore take care of it?”

  “It’s not like that,” I say evenly. I wasn’t trying to blame her. “I take responsibility for what I did. It was wrong and I felt lousy afterwards. If it makes you feel any better, she kept trying to get me to fuck her, but I wouldn’t.”

  Annie snaps. “If it makes me feel any better?” she screeches. “If it makes me feel better that you didn’t fuck her? Oh, whoop-dee-fucking-doo, Dom! Do you want a goddamn medal for only getting your dick sucked?” Her eyes are wild now. “I’m a fucking idiot,” she sobs, and the tears are falling again. “I should have known better. I knew you were no good, I knew it.”