The Invader Candidate: From the Adventures of Khraa-Veh, Alien Explorer

by Don Cook

  April, normally a quiet woman, said, “Jim’s right. There’s Bambi Bambino here. Take a bow, Bambi.” Bambi did a curtsy-bow for the ranch hands. “Some of you guys already know who Bambi is — and if you don’t, you’re more morally pure than most of the guys here.

  “Now, Jim and I keep tabs of what everyone here does in their spare time,” April went on with Texas-tough maternal sternness, “so don’t yawls dare think we don’t know about those tapes, DVD’s, and BluRays yawls have with Bambi here in them. Yawls better gather them all up and burn them!”

  Bambi felt embarrassed. Many of the male ranch hands (and some of the female ones), having watched Bambi’s adult videos, felt uneasily ashamed.

  “And these other nine people,” April continued, “are real foreigners because they aren’t even from our little old Earth. They are literally from a galaxy far, far away.”

  A chorus of astonished gaps arose from the crowd, followed by even more gasps of greater astonishment as the same bright light that shone in the Stocks’ living room earlier slowly shone from behind Jim, April and the non-Earthlings, and, as before, materialized into Jesus in a shining open vision.

  I’ll take it from here, April, Jesus spoke to the crowd. And I thank you, April, for setting your hired help straight about Bambi Bambino. Ranch hands, I know your every secret deed and word, including whenever you watch the labors of Bambi’s sinful past. She has long given up that sinful line of work for My sake, so all of you had better heed April’s words and destroy all the sinful media you have of Bambi and those of other similarly misguided women and men. Jim and April both want all you to be with Me in Heaven when it’s your appointed time just as much as I do.

  The ranch hands were greatly ashamed and humbled as Jesus continued, Yes, people, I am indeed the Lord, your God. And yes, these nine strangers you see here come from far beyond the Solar System. These nine and their people have served My ends among the stars since their ancestors came to faith in Me. Do not think I left their Nephilimite ancestors to their own devices. As I told the Stocks, these aliens’ ancestral half-demonic parentage only changed the magnitude of these non-Earthly peoples’ need for Me as their Savior, not the need itself.

  And as I told Jim and his guests, Jesus continued, it was by My grace that many humans who were enslaved by the Nephilimites prayed for them. I honored their supplications, and appeared to those Nephilimites who questioned why they did the evils they did after the Day of Pentecost.

  They repented and begged Me to be their new Savior and Master, and asked Me to change them into beings that could dwell with and serve Me. And so, through the Holy Spirit, I did so. And they overthrew their unrepentant Nephilimite overlords who oppressed human and lesser Nephilimites alike.

  In return for their faithfulness, My Father and I allowed them to keep their super-abilities to use in fighting evil across My Universe. The nine strangers before you today are descended from these same repentant Nephilimite ancestors whom I cleansed of their demonic blood and made whole because of their repentance.

  But there are still evil Nephilimites, dearly beloved, all of them being nationals of the Shrion Empire, the evilest realm in the cosmos. Khraa-Veh, who took on the identity of truther Astra Ruth Downey upon arriving on Earth — the real Downey having died due to a tragic accident —

  is a space explorer-scientist, and was the Deputy-Commander of an Expedition to the ruin-laden planet Rubiaar IV.

  Along with her loving late husband and Expedition Commander Commodore/Dr. Isokk-Elheem, Jesus went on, and her late metallurgist-brother Level-2 Lieutenant/Dr. Yesh-Veh, Khraa studied the completely-depopulated planet Rubiaar IV. They were aided by Level-2 Commander/Dr. Velbya-Koyne ven-Kylae, the Expedition’s Chief Health Officer, to Khraa’s right, socio-archaeological metallurgist Commander/Dr. Har-Nyxxlon to Captain Veh’s left, and a host of other skilled Expedition colleague-friends and studied Rubiaar IV so they could learn what led to the downfall of its civilization and subsequent extinction of its humans.

  One morning, the Shrion’s hands-on queen-mother-spy, Mephistula, led a Pearl Harbor-style all-out attack on that planet, murdering almost the entire Expeditionary compliment and most of their children and pets...”

  “And that is why I’m here in open vision today, Jesus said, after He told the Earthlings in great detail about the fate of Khraa/Astra’s expedition for half an hour, and how Khraa/Astra and Mephistula/Stanton came to Earth. To help all of you stop Mephistula. I have a role for each of you to play in this battle, and yes, it is a battle.

  And fear not, Khraa, for your youngest daughter Aleeta, her friend Opio-Tyarr and even your pet wing-cat Flitty still live. They are in suspended animation, in that Rubiaarian two-person so-called “love-rocket” that you and your fellow scientists were studying, which Aleeta set to auto-pilot before it blasted them off to safety, and is now adrift in spacetime. I will reunite you with your daughter, her friend and your flying feline friend in the fullness of time.

  Khraa/Astra was relieved with anticipation at Jesus’ assurance that she would someday be reunited with Aleeta and Opio.

  “Lord,” Khraa/Astra asked Jesus humbly, “what of my family who did not survive?”

  Jesus said, Isokk, Shurrah, and Yesh are with Me and My Father in Heaven.

  “But…” Khraa/Astra asked with dread, “what of Svetlia?”

  Jesus simply, and sadly, shook His head no. Khraa/Astra, although she had just learned that her eldest daughter was in the eternal torment of hell, had cried so many tears lately that in that moment, Khraa/Astra was far too “cried out” to shed a tear.

  “Lord… what did I do with my Svetlia that was wrong?” Khraa/Astra quietly asked, greatly humbled with shame for what she saw as a mother’s failure.

  You did the best job you could, Jesus said. But Svetlia’s heart, mind, and soul were always too hardened towards Me for Me to save her. You knew for a long time, despite the best efforts by you and Isokk, that Svetlia was far too full of herself for Me. You already know all-too well, Khraa, from your total Internet absorption that all-too many of today’s Earthpeople are terribly hardhearted.

  This is especially true for the technology-addicted Millennials, Jesus continued, with His grief and righteous anger for youth lacing His every word. They are a sad, mad, and twisted pro-globalist totalitarian-evil and adulterous generation whose utterly hardened hearts are light-eons far from Me and My love! That is, unless and until My Father and I take drastic action soon to humble this proud younger generation that hates its elders, anything from any yesteryear (wrongly branding all that was with their favorite epithet “irrelevant”) and, worst of all, seeks too much too fast based on a wrongful attitude of being woefully and avariciously entitled! Such are the ways of those who reject Me in favor of the Lake of Fire.

  Mike, who always knew that those born in the decade after him or later, felt vindicated by Jesus’ words, yet was not happy about it. Other adults in Christ among those assembled felt the same way Mike did.

  Glenn and Val did not know whether to feel guilty or mortified at Jesus’ indicting words about their Establishment-freaky younger generation, as well as those up to thirty years their senior. Donny, meanwhile, took the hint and wanted to be a better person.

  Khraa/Astra realized, even though the truth about Svetlia was painful, that Jesus was right, which helped her get on with her own life.

  But do not grieve, Khraa, Jesus continued. You and your late Isokk raised all three of your children the way any child should go. But just as certain people will do drugs, alcohol, or take up with any other evil habit no matter how one tries to help steer them right, Svetlia herself couldn’t be bothered with coming to faith in Me at all. Just like there are many who couldn’t be bothered with chemical or herbal addictions, or any other vice. Therefore, Khraavie… please take comfort in the fact that you did your best.

  The Son of Man turned to April and said, April, bring Me the soda crackers and grape juice so we can take My supper. I shal
l bless each element and place within them the knowledge of each person’s role in this noblest endeavor, as well as the knowledge and skills he or she will need to carry it out. Let us now begin the Communion, with everyone in the back row, left to right, lining up first for the bread and juice, followed by the middle row, and finally the front row.

  April did as Jesus had asked. Everyone from the rear row walked up to Jesus, who spoke in tongues over the crackers and juice, blessing and imparting each communion element with a briefing on each person’s role in the coming battle, and the skills and instructions each person would need to carry out his or her task. The people in the second row came forth next, followed by those in the front, with Jesus repeating the same kind of impartation upon and into each communion element each person’s role, skills, and orders for the impending fight with Mephistula and her evil allies.

  Glenn, Val and Donny, due to their ages, did not take communion, but each of them prayed instead.

  Jesus said, I made a promise to My Disciples not to drink such wine with any of them, or you, until that very day when I drink it new with you in My Father’s kingdom. This promise I made to My Disciples is written in Matthew 26. But this day, I give you these elements, which I have imbued with your duties in the coming battle against Mephistula.

  So, therefore, take and eat; this is my body, which was bruised for your sins and wrongdoings.

  Each person gathered in the three-row semicircle of chairs at Jim’s ranch ate their small crackers blessed by Jesus.

  The Son of Man said to them, Now, take the small cup you each hold and drink of it, for this is my blood of the covenant, which is poured out for many for the forgiveness of all your sins.

  Each person drank from his or her small shot-sized cup.

  You each know your task and how to carry it out, Jesus said. And to Mike and Khraa, you have My blessings to get married. Jim, have your medical technicians carry out the necessary blood tests for these two, along with those of Admiral Makarrth’s group and eight humans from Earth. I am aware this will take about seven to ten days, but you have ample time before the battle on July 15th to do these tasks.

  You will also have that time to prepare the spaceship Blue 1, as well as Mike, Khraa, Har, Tranxa, Velbie and two others for their unique duties. I have internalized within each of you My orders of this battle, so simply do My will once the time is at hand. Khraa will receive the dream or vision of when to spring into action.

  Jesus looked at Donny with His unique fondness.

  And Donny… Jesus said, fear not, for I know your heart seeks Me in earnest.

  “Thanks, Jesus!” Donny said.

  And so, Jesus said, by the power of the Holy Spirit, I am with each of you and all of you always, now and forevermore. Amen...

  “Amen” spoke all mortals present reverently, as the vision of Jesus gently disappeared. Dr. Goldshtein, a Messianic Jew, prayed in Hebrew for the coming battle.

  “Okay, everyone!” Jim said, before he clapped his hands. “We’ve all got work to do!”

  Dr. Goldshtein finished his prayer before Jim said to him, “Goldy, get your docs and nurses to do bloodwork on Mike, the aliens, three other Earthmen and four Earthwomen to compare our blood with theirs, as well as for Mike and Khraavie’s marriage license.”

  “Yes, Jim” Dr. Goldshtein said. “I’ll get on it straight away.”

  “Why the extra bloodwork?” Glenn asked.

  “They’re going to find out whether Khraavie and her people are on the level with us, Glenn” Val said. “The results should be interesting.”

  Blood tests, bureaucratic paperwork and wedding preparations, or things akin to them, all take their share of time, in any part of the Universe.

  It took seven days of nonstop work for not only the blood-testing needed to allow for Mike and me to get the necessary marriage license to legally love-bond [i.e.: marry] on Earth. But get those blood-tests done we did.

  What was most time-consuming about the bloodwork, due to the scientific curiosity of the Earthlings analyzing our blood (particularly Dr. Goldshtein) was the comparative blood analyses given by Admiral Makarrth’s team and myself, and comparing it with those by Mike and several other Earthling humans. (We scientists are more curious than an anxious feline.)

  But on the sixth day, we got the news we were hoping for from Jim and Dr. Goldshtein...

  Dr. Khraa-Veh ven-Bonhoeffer

  Admiral, Platinum-Class, AMKEXPRA (Ret’d)

  My Cosmos-Spanning Memoirs

  LIVING ROOM, RANCH HOUSE, THREE-CROSS RANCH

  TEXAS, USA

  2 JULY 8:59 AM CENTRAL TIME

  “I’ve got good news, everyone!” Jim said to Khraa/Astra, Mike, his family, Bambi, Velbya, Har, Makarrth and the other four non-Earthly persons on the advisory-team. “I’ll let Goldy tell yawls.”

  “After days of close examination and microscopic scrutiny by me and my staff of scientists and technicians,” Dr. Goldshtein said with a smile that matched his overwhelming joy, “we came to the inescapable conclusion that you, Khraavie, and your space-friends are exactly as advertised. You’re all just as human as I am, or Jim, or Mike, or any of us Earthlings are. And upon this, I say, congratulations, Mike and Khraavie! You’re both good to get a bona fide marriage license!” Dr. Goldshtein extended his hand to Mike and said joyfully, “Mazel tov!”

  “Thanks, Goldy!” Mike said, as he and Dr. Goldshtein shook hands.

  “Where did you do the tests?” Khraa/Astra said.

  “We have extensive labs and other facilities here under the ranch” Jim said. “Come.”

  UNDERGROUND TECHNOLOGY LAB TL-7A

  BENEATH THREE-CROSS RANCH, TEXAS, USA

  9:47 AM CENTRAL TIME

  “This looks like an Area 51-type setup!” Bambi said, as everyone moved down a long sterile-white glass-walled corridor that connected a network of clandestine clean-room laboratories. “Why all this, Jim?”

  “I have always believed in intelligent life on other worlds, Ms. Bambino,” Jim said, “and I didn’t want the government to get all the goods on UFOs. I don’t trust Uncle Sam, but then, what real American does? Think of this as sort of a ‘counter-X-Files.’”

  “But where did you get the money for all this?!” Khraa/Astra said, anxiously perplexed about how even a rich Texas rancher from a well-to-do family could afford to build and maintain facilities that most Earthly governments could not. “How could one private Earthly individual, even a man of great means like yourself, Jim, afford —?”

  “Several years ago, Khraavie,” Jim said, with a disturbing nonchalant calmness, “I was part of a joint CIA-CSIS-MI6 covert operation that brought down globalist and international terrorist/illegal narcotics/human trafficker/mega-financier Georgi Schachter. You know, Mike, the ultra-wealthy Bulgarian-born —”

  “Yeah, I remember that filthy-rich crook!” Mike said. “Back when I had just joined the Bureau.”

  Mike turned to Khraa/Astra and unearthly company and said, “Georgi Schachter was one of the richest criminals who ever lived. If he wanted to, he could have literally bought out every holding and all the property owned by Bill Gates’ Microsoft and all of Bill Gates’s entire personal net worth, as well as those of Apple, Steve Jobs, Oprah Winfrey, Warren Buffet and lots of other mega-corporations and ultra-filthy-rich people.”

  “We took down Schachter back in the 1990s,” Jim said, “and seized everything he had, all set to prosecute with enough evidence to execute the guy.”

  “So,” Bambi said, “why didn’t you try him?”

  “He was willing to talk if he handed us all his wealth except for a mere few thousand dollars. I said to him, ‘Georgie Porgy Money Guy/If you do not want to die/We’ll let you go, George, in the nude/If you give us all your money, dude!’”

  Everyone laughed.

  “So, with what we had on him and a lot of other key people,” Jim said, “Schachter coughed it all up, and gave all his wealth and holdings to me. Lots of people went to the sla
mmer because of Schachter’s turning state’s evidence.”

  “But, Uncle Jim,” Val said, puzzled at Jim’s actions, “wouldn’t seizing all that super-rich guy’s money have been illegal?”

  “Schachter backed a multitude of key Washington and state judges and politicians on both sides of the aisle, Val, and they backed him. They would have all gone to jail if we revealed his links to them all, and thus leave America without any government whatsoever. And so, I cut a deal with the State Department, the Justice Department, Supreme Court and even the sitting President of that day. And since many of those powerful guys and gals were already receiving obscenely huge amounts of wampum from Georgie, I got all of Schachter’s cash and other holdings, sold off all of his assets, in order of ease of liquidity —”

  “Uncle Jim,” Donny asked, “what is ‘liquidity?’”

  “Liquidity, Donny,” Jim said, “is how quickly you can sell something for cold, hard cash.”

  “Oh!” Donny said, his eyes lighting up like a Christmas tree with excitement. “I get it! Cool!”

  “It is” Jim said. “Anyway, I decided to donate one-third of the money to Christian churches and charities that I thought could use a hand-up…” Jim motioned his hand from left to right as he said, “I took the rest of the money, and built all this and more.”

  “Wow!” Glenn said. “That rich crook must have had really, really deep pockets.”

  “He sure did, Glenn” Jim said. “He sure did.”

  “So, Daddy,” Val asked, “why didn’t you get any of that rich bad guy’s money?”

  “I didn’t want that much money, sweetie,” Mike said, “and I did not have the necessary clearance. It would have also likely gotten me into big trouble with the IRS. I would have had way too much explaining to do to the taxman, and I didn’t want that. In fact, I probably would have ended up in a place like Leavenworth.”

  “America’s Lubyanka?!” Val said, in terrified shock.

  “I wouldn’t go that far, Val,” Jim said, “but your Dad doesn’t want to risk prison for money.”