Beginning with Forever

by Lan LLP

  “I won’t have any problems keeping my eye on this young beauty,” his father replies and winks at me with a grin.

  Carson squeezes the tops of his father’s shoulders and playfully snaps, “Watch it, Dad, she’s already spoken for.” He smiles and walks to the stage.

  Carson is indisputably an impressive speaker. His passion to find the absolute cure for cancer is apparent. It sounds like he lost someone close to him to this horrible disease. He captures everyone’s undivided attention and continues to pour on his endless charm to the very end. The audience applauses loudly, giving him a deserving standing ovation. He ends his speech by encouraging his guests to continue to have a wonderful time. I feel personally proud to care for such an accomplished man with a genuine appreciation for humanitarian needs. My anger slowly dissipates as I remember the real reason I’m here.

  Carson walks over to me, offers his hand and drags me onto the dance floor. “Didn’t I mention that you’ll be in my arms again?” he grins.

  “I’m not a good dancer.” I bashfully pull away, shaking my head to deter him. I hate to embarrass him in front of all his guests with my two left feet.

  “All you need to do is follow my lead. I’ll do the rest, just like in the bedroom,” he flirtatiously arches one eyebrow high. “May I have the pleasure of dancing with the most beautiful and challenging woman in this ballroom?” he requests with a smirk, reaching his hand out to me.

  Carson signals the band, and it’s their cue to play a song he requested, I’m assuming. I don’t recognize the tune. “What is it called?” I inquire.

  “‘Right Down The Line’ by Gerry Rafferty,” he tells me. “My parents used to dance to it often. I witnessed their unique kind of love and always wanted it for myself.” He draws my body closer to his and whispers, “Lily, I have a lot faith in us.”

  “I want to also, but I’m afraid,” I whisper back to him.

  “Don’t be. I only want to make you happy.” He places his left hand along my neck and draws my forehead against his lips. I need his reassurance more than ever, especially after the last two emotional nights. I watch Carson’s father lead his mother onto the dance floor with a doting smile. They do appear very much in love. His father gives him a thumb up behind his mother’s back and winks at us. His playfulness makes me grin ridiculously and squeeze my man even tighter. Carson sings the words into my ears, and those darn goosebumps reappear again. After hearing the lyrics, I can understand why he picked this particular song and what he’s trying to tell me. He wants me in his life and has no doubt in his heart about it. If only he can confirm that everything Hayden had told me is untrue, I would feel more certain. I also want a future with him in it, but he needs to trust me enough to be honest with me. My mind is on overload this evening. Carson imparts one light feathery kiss on my lips, and it brings me back to him. “Lily, have faith in us,” he repeats. Holding my hand, he leads me off the dance floor, but instead of heading back to our table, Carson takes me over to a table close to the bar. “I have an old friend I’d like to introduce you to. This is Jack Filmore. He’s the Dean of Harvard Medical School.” I’m caught off guard with Carson’s ambush.

  “Miss Ly, it’s a pleasure to meet you. Carson has been bragging about you and all your academic achievements. I’d be honored if you’ll allow me to give you a tour of our school,” he politely offers his hospitality while making me blush at the same time.

  “Dean Filmore, the honor is all mine, of course. I appreciate your offer,” I courteously reply with a weak smile. Hmm, I wonder what Carson is up to. If I had wanted to go to Harvard, I would’ve have applied there. Dean Filmore and I continue to have a lengthy conversation about the benefits of traditional residency versus an accelerated program. I personally don’t agree with his argument of traditional being superior, but I respectfully listen to his reasoning.

  Carson could sense that the Dean’s pushiness is annoying me and intervenes just before I could show his friend my headstrong side. “Jack, if you don’t mind, I’d like to steal my lovely date back.” Carson reaches for my hand, and I gladly take it.

  “Miss Ly, hope to see you on campus one of these days and enjoy the rest of your evening.” Dean Filmore sends Carson a hidden message with his subtle facial expressions as he talks to me. I almost get the feeling that they’re collectively up to something.

  “Thank you Dean Filmore.” I forge another smile on my face and then turn to Carson. “Why did you introduce me to the Dean of Harvard Medical School?” I confront him with suspicion and irritation.

  He brings a tight fist to his mouth, hiding his deceptive grin and then clears his throat before answering my question. “I’m just trying to open up more doors for you, Angel.” He has the look of a guilty, scheming man caught in the act, and I’m onto him.

  “Thank you for trying, but I’m perfectly happy in St. Croix. I plan on finishing my remaining four years there,” I stubbornly tell him with my brows knitted and eyes narrowed. Carson has yet to realize how headstrong and unbending I can be when I’m determined about something. He’s definitely up for a challenge with me, there’s no doubt about that.

  “I get it, Lil. Keep the doors closed until you want them opened,” he replies dryly, making me wanting to laugh out loud.

  As soon as dinner is wrapped up, the real excitement begins with casino festivities. I act the part of Carson’s arm candy and watch him play several rounds of poker and blackjack. He would occasionally look to me for a ‘Hit’ or ‘Stay’ move like I’m an expert at it. I would shrug my shoulders and smile. I guess it’s his way of letting me know that he’s including me. Gambling had never fascinated me, so I’m easily bored with it. I set Carson free and assure him that I’ll be fine without his company. I decide to people watch from our dinner table instead. I notice Carson’s mother is chatting up a storm with Bianca at the bar. They’re giggling over some funny incident they both must’ve shared. From my view, they appear pretty tight and of course, I’m envious of what they have. Carson’s mother made it clear that she’s not comfortable with my age, but I can’t let it bother me right now. I already have way too much on my mind, and I don’t need to add anymore to my plate.

  Carson flirts with me from across the room with his staring eyes as he continues to gamble with his guests. I give him a partial smile and pull my phone out of my clutch to log onto Facebook. I need a distraction from Carson’s mother and Bianca. Before I’m able to tap ‘News Feed’ on my screen, Bianca sits down next to me unexpectedly and unwelcomed. Carson locks his eyes securely on her. He remains fixed in his chair while he studies her motive. I gather he’s avoiding an embarrassing situation for all three of us by not running immediately over to me.

  “Wow, you’ve scrubbed up nicely for a housekeeper,” she slices acutely through me with her critical staring eyes. Her voice is permeated with sarcasm.

  “Thank you, I never claimed I was. You just assumed,” I wittily retort. My heart is revving up, and my breathing is no longer steady.

  “I’m sure you know who I am by now. I’m Bianca, the woman he’ll return to as soon as he grows bored of you like all the rest.” Her expression is smug and aloof.

  “I see, and when do you suppose that’ll be?” I struggle to remain composed as she digs deep into my nerves with her scornful claws. My legs are nervously shaking underneath the table as my nails cut into my fists.

  “Well…when he’s bored of fucking and using you, little girl. Honey, it won’t take long. I promise you he’ll be begging me to take him back into my bed very soon.” She sounds too convincingly confident, and I hate her shitty threat even more. How did he ever fall for this loony woman? She’s a bitch, and I hate her arrogance. I don’t like to use that word often, and only when it’s absolutely necessary, because I detest derogatory names for women. It’s definitely necessary right now to express my hateful feelings for her.

  “It’s been a pleasure,” I sarcastically grit my words out through my tight jaw. “I don’t want
to make a scene because I don’t want to stoop to your level,” I angrily express to her, stand up, and stomp away.

  She’s definitely bitter about their breakup and is using this opportunity to show me that it’s far from being over. She wants her man back and doesn’t care that he sleeps with me until he goes back to her. What a twistedly sick and desperate woman. The question for me is, am I his rebound? This evening has been full of shitty surprises for me. I just want to scream my lungs out. This place is suffocating the hell out of me. I can’t seem to catch my breath all evening. Where’s the exit? I have to get out of here ASAP! I feel like I’m literally drowning even though I’m on a floating boat, ironically. I find myself walking quickly and then running.

  “Lily, where are you going?” Carson calls after me and attempts to head in my direction. I stop to look back at him and see Bianca detaining him with her greedy arms around his. He looks pissed as she suddenly forces a kiss on his lips. Appalled by her action, he crossly backs away, pulls his arm free from her hold and attempts to talk to her. From the infuriated expression on her face, everyone who’s watching can assume she’s not pleased with what Carson has conveyed to her. His eyes dart back and forth to my location the entire time, fearing that he might lose me. She stomps away in her incredibly high heels, looking bitterly enraged while Carson’s guests nosily stare with confusion. After all, they were still engaged not that long ago which doesn’t settle well with me either. Bianca bores a hole through the crowd and disappears with Carson’s mother chasing after her. I use this opportunity to make my own escape. I have no idea where I’m going as burning tears stream down my face. There’s no stopping them now. Even the Hoover Dam couldn’t hold them back.

  “Lily, stop!” he yells as he tries to catch up with me down the hallway. I purposely ignore his plea, not wanting him to see me fall apart like the pathetic, weak girl I really am on the inside. I continue running as fast as I could in my dangerous heels, winded and panting. He has no trouble catching up with me with his long stride and endurance and abruptly seizes my wrist to stop me. I angrily jerk away from him and trip over my ankle-damaging heels, causing me to clumsily land on the floor. I was lucky enough to break my fall with both hands before my face hit the hardwood floor. “Shit, are you hurt Lily?” He drops to the ground next to me and examines my ankles and wrists. It’s my pride that’s hurting, not my body.

  “I can’t handle your psychotic ex-fiancée. She’s confident that you’ll be running back to her bed as soon as you’re done using me. Carson, just save me the misery, and end it now. I can’t deal with empty promises, especially from you,” I weep the painful words out.

  Hurt bleeds through the veins of his eyes as he caresses my cheeks with his hands and wipes the dampness from my face. Remorse now replaces hurt as he continues to erase new tears flowing freely from my eyes. The pads of his thumbs are heavily stained with streaks of black and shimmery purple from my eye makeup. “Lily, I’ve never loved Bianca, and I never will. It was a mistake for me to agree to marry her, one that I’ve regretted over and over again. I want you to be a part of my life, not her or anyone else. Please don’t ask me to end us. It’s the same as telling my heart to quit beating.” His warm quivering voice is full of sincerity and conviction while his compelling eyes force me to yield to his plea. I want to believe him so badly, but I’m struggling. This is all too much for a simple girl like me to take in.

  “How will I know that you won’t toss me aside after you’re bored with me like all the other women in your life?” my shaky voice demands validation.

  “There’s no room in my life for anyone else but you. Please believe me.” He clasps my hands between his, attempting to earn my fragile trust again.

  “Carson, I’m trying. I really am. It’s just so flippin’ hard for me since I know so little about you,” I sigh with a lengthened, troubled breath.

  “We can change all of that, starting tonight. I promise you’ll know everything about me by the end of this trip.” He deliberately gives me his charming wry smile, hoping to ease, maybe even dissipate my anger. Why do I always fall for that? Because his dimple is so damn irresistible, that’s why. My defensive wall crumbles into a million emotional pieces, making me crave to be in his arms again.

  “I’m still not okay with all of this. I’ll need time to get over your billionaire status and crazy-ex.” I poke him in his chest.

  “Lily, I’ll give you all the time in the world, but please get rid of that sexy ruffled look on your beautiful face right now. It’s making me so fucking hard for you.”

  “What look?” I narrowed my eyes and pretend to look even more pissed.

  “Don’t toy with me, Lily.” He scoops me off the floor and throws me over his shoulders as I resist him futilely. “I’m going to take you to my room and share myself with you until you beg me to hold my tongue,” he warns me with a sly grin. His muscular arms lock my legs securely against his chest. My face is flushed as my curly ringlets flow freely behind him. I continue to fight for my freedom, but it’s pointless against his strong grip as he carries me down an arched hallway. He stops at a locked cabin door, pulls a keycard out and slides it through the slot. The door opens to a private bedroom. He closes it behind us with a light tap of his foot.

  The cabin suite is tastefully decorated with fresh white décor similar to his Water Tower condo. Lighting is kept low, enhancing the warm and inviting ambience of the room. He drops my body on top of a soft white comforter with my legs suspended over the edge of the bed. The split of my dress makes his access most convenient. It wouldn’t surprise me if he had planned everything down to the tiniest detail, including the style of this dress and how he intended to end the evening with me out of it.

  “I wanted to rip this dress off your body the second I saw you enter the ballroom, looking so incredibly gorgeous. It hugs your curves so perfectly. Your mesmerizing presence dissolved everything and everyone around me. I couldn’t think or see straight.” He lowers his body over mine and buries his needs into my breasts. “I’m going to fuck you all night until you realize that all I want is you and all you want is me.” There’s so much lust in his gorgeous, dark, dilated eyes, and his tone is hypnotic to my ears. This aggressive side of him is new to me, and I’m a little apprehensive, but unmistakably turned on at the same time. Grabbing the slit of my couture dress, he rips it intrusively pass my waist. I’m gasping for air with anticipation for his next move. My throbbing sex is drenched with desire for him, eagerly yielding to his voice, his command.

  “Baby, give me your body. I want to own it tonight,” he demands, not requests. Carson rips my garter off and then the remaining part of my dress and ties my hands together with the garter belt. I’m not sure about this, being tied up and having my freedom taken away is frightful, not hot to me. I panic and squirm, my body is under his control. “Don’t be afraid. I’m not going to hurt you. I only want to please you. Set yourself free and let me have your body tonight,” he murmurs his plea along my neck and behind my ear. My body trembles from his sultry voice promising me pure pleasure.

  “I’ll try,” I mumble, pushing my fear to the back of my head.

  He rips my panties off. The echoing sound of torn lace makes me even hotter. “Not good enough. Promise me, Lil.” His voice is more demanding and authoritative. Am I finally seeing and hearing the real Carson? He drops down to his knees and places his head between my thighs, gently spreading them apart. Oh god, I feel his pounding tongue, taunting and coercing me to tell him what he wants to hear. He’s too good at this. I’m not a worthy opponent against his seduction.

  “Uh…uh…yes, I promise,” I pant as his velvet tongue glides inside my pulsing walls, tasting the sweet result of his doing. Without any warning, I hear a soft buzzing sound and then vibrating sensation sends my entire body into an explosive volcanic eruption. “Uh…uh…Carson, oh my god!” I moan and then clench my jaw, trying to hang on to my dignity. I find myself gripping the sheets tighter and then my fingers
find their way through his thick, dark hair, pulling him closer to me with my bounded wrists.

  There’s such a fine line between pain and pleasure. I want to scream ‘Stop!’ badly, but my body forbids me as it begs ‘More!’ Carson relentlessly continues until he feels my body completely soften from my high. My legs slide lifelessly over the edge of the bed as my chest rises and falls like tidal waves surging over smooth sand. He stands up and presses his hard body into mine. “I love seeing you like this and knowing it’s because of me.” He makes no mention of the surprise addition, and I’m too prudish to ask. At this point, does it really matter? I’ve already given him full ownership of my body.

  I’m so weakened by his climax-induced shock that my body is under his mercy. He could probably do just about whatever he wanted to me right now, and face no resistance because I don’t even have an ounce of strength left in me. My hands are untied only to be securely retied again to the lower bars on the headboard. He circles his arms around my chest to my back, unclasps the bustier hooks and yanks it off, exposing my entire body for his bidding. I can hear his jagged breathing as his reaping eyes move up and down my captive body. He cups my breasts and massages, sucking them until the melting sensation from his warm mouth flows down to my sopping clit. My nipples are not spared from his aggression. He laps his tongue around each one and firmly nips down with his lips. I whimper and bite on my lower lip to subdue the stinging sensation. “Carson, I can’t take much more of your teasing. Please…,” I beg him breathlessly.