Engaging Love: A Historical Regency Romance Novel

by Abby Ayles

  “If you will have me despite my apparent idiocy,” Lord Ridgecleff replied. “And allow me to tell you now how deeply I have come to admire you.

  “You have the ability to brighten my day and fill me with joy no matter how dark things may seem. You are far more practical than I had thought. More so than I think anyone else realizes.

  “You sparkle at a ball. When I saw you—I thought I couldn’t breathe for a moment. I hated having to share you with the other men. Yet, at the same time, I loved how popular you were. I was proud to point you out and tell people, that is my future wife.”

  Lord Ridgecleff? Proud of her? Proud to claim her? Natalie felt almost giddy with happiness. This was beyond what she had even hoped to have.

  His voice grew soft, and impossibly fond. “I cannot even begin to explain to you the joy that you bring me. I have seen how you have chosen to alter your behavior and habits to fit in my life. And I hope that I have shown you the same deference.

  “I have made a great failure in not showing you more of how I felt. I hope to rectify that and spend the next period of time until our wedding showing you in every conceivable fashion how blessed I feel to have you as my life partner.”

  “Perhaps I should have started to realize when you began to give me such lovely gifts,” Natalie replied. “And when you flirted with me at the ball. As if we were still courting.”

  “I had realized that we had not truly had the time to court,” Lord Ridgecleff explained. “I thought that I might fix that. A friend pointed out that a lady likes to be reminded that she is desirable.”

  “You did a very good job with that,” Natalie assured him. “Had I not been so convinced of my own lost chance I should have felt at once that you were in love with me.”

  “It seems that we are both fools in love. It is fortunate that now we can be fools together.”

  Natalie found that wetness was gathering in the corners of her eyes. She hastily tried to wipe it away. But Lord Ridgecleff’s face changed to one of dismay and she knew that he had noticed.

  “Whatever is the matter?”

  She shook her head. “I’m terribly sorry. It’s only that—well. I thought that I had no chance with you. I thought that this would be goodbye.

  “And instead it is hello, so to speak.” She laughed at herself. “I’m a ridiculous girl for crying over such a thing as happiness. But I’m just so glad. I thought—and now—and I shall get all that of which I dreamed.”

  “I would give you the world, if you dreamed of that,” Lord Ridgecleff replied.

  He handed her a handkerchief and Natalie laughed, using it to wipe at her eyes. “Thank you.”

  He held out his hand to her once she was finished. Natalie placed her hand in his without question. It felt natural to do so.

  It felt natural for him to raise her hand to his mouth and lightly kiss the knuckles. It sent an electric thrill through her. He loved her. He loved her. She was a woman in love. A woman who was loved.

  She wanted to laugh hysterically until her ribs ached. She wanted to dash into the house to find Louisa and scream girlishly with her. She wanted to sob with relief as all the fear and sadness she’d been holding back worked their way through her.

  But there would be time for all of that, she supposed. Or at least most of that.

  For now she rose up on her toes and, in the garden that would soon be hers, officially, she kissed him. Just the once, softly, gently.

  Her hand was still caught up in his and he squeezed it. As if to reassure her that this was all real. As if to tell her that this wasn’t some dream or hoax. That they really got to have this.

  She pulled away and caught his dazed smile as she did so. She could feel a dazed smile of her own. They must look like a pair of idiots to anyone who walked past.

  But she didn’t care.

  This was what all of those ridiculous poems and books talked about, Natalie thought. This was what she had seen between Louisa and Mr. Fairchild. Between Regina and her fiancé. Between Elizabeth and Mr. Denny on their wedding day.

  And now she would get to have it as well.

  She couldn’t think of a more wonderful thing than that.

  Chapter 40

  Edward knew the moment that John stepped into the room.

  “I take it you two worked it out, then,” he said, smiling knowingly.

  “Do I really appear that much changed?” John asked.

  “You look like a man who has just come into sunlight and is dazzled by it,” Edward answered.

  That was a rather apt description.

  John inclined his head. “I spoke to the lady, as you suggested. I should have done so a long time ago, of course. It was childish of me to keep my thoughts to myself. And cowardly.

  “But she has confirmed what you told me. That she felt affection for me and feared that it was not returned. And once I confessed that I was in the same position…

  “Well. We had quite a moment of contemplation regarding our own folly, as you can well imagine.”

  Edward crossed over to him, still smiling. “But you are in accord now at last?” he asked.

  John nodded. “Yes. I’m sure that her sister is quite relieved.” He fixed his brother with a stern look. “I have a grave suspicion that you two conspired a bit behind our backs.”

  Edward shrugged, clearly feeling no guilt on the matter. “She was very kind while I struggled through the subject of our terrible loss. At one point I mentioned that you at least had Miss Natalie to comfort you.

  “Miss Louisa then confided in me how her sister felt. I confided that I had known you all of my life and knew when you had deep feelings for someone. I told her that I was certain her sister’s affections were returned.

  “And so it was decided that we would mention it to each of you in the hopes that this whole issue might be resolved. We only wished for the two of you to be happy. I believe that I had a chance to speak to you before Miss Louisa could speak to her sister.

  “But no matter. It has all worked out now.” Edward grinned at him boyishly. “And you may scold me all that you wish, brother. But now you and your lady are happy. I see no reason to regret my actions.”

  “I suppose that putting you in charge of arranging for various items in the wedding will be punishment enough,” John countered. “Perhaps you would like to be the one in charge of purchasing flower orders?”

  Edward laughed. “You cannot dissuade me from my good humor, John. I know that this is a trying time for all of us. But a wedding to plan as well as a funeral, it does take some of the sadness away. And Father would be proud of you.”

  “I like to think so,” John said. He felt a pang of sadness in his chest at the thought of his father. He suspected that he would feel that for some time.

  But it would lessen. He had seen enough people lose someone and learn to live with it. He knew that he would as well. It would just take time.

  And until then, and after then, and all the time in between, Miss Natalie would be there.

  No, just Natalie. His future wife. And she would call him John. They would be there for one another. Truly.

  For the first time since he had gotten that letter from his father, John was optimistic about his future.

  No—more than that.

  He was looking forward to it. Embracing it.

  Epilogue

  Natalie did not like to brag.

  Well, not anymore, anyway.

  But she did like to think that she looked rather well in her wedding dress.

  Bridget said so, anyway. She had come from the Continent with Lady Cora. Regina called the woman simply “Cora,” but Natalie had not gotten to know her as well just yet. She kept the ‘lady’ at the beginning.

  “I’m proud of you,” Bridget told her as they prepared to have Natalie walk down the aisle.

  She laid her hands on Natalie’s shoulders. “I think perhaps I have given you the impression that I am disappointed in you. Or that I did not care for you as much a
s the others.

  “You are my darling sister the same as your siblings. I love you. And I am so very proud of how you have turned out and how you have handled this.”

  Natalie cried just a little at that and had to wipe her face delicately with her handkerchief. Bridget smiled at her.

  As did all of her other sisters.

  Natalie had never been the one that they were proud of. Oh, Regina had been left alone as well. But she knew that none of them approved of her nature. Of her flirtations and behavior.

  Now she had all four of them looking at her with pride and joy in their eyes.

  It was almost more than she could bear—but in the best way.

  “He does look very handsome,” Regina noted, looking over at where Lord Ridgecleff—John—stood, waiting for her.

  Regina had grown to be much more outspoken and confident since her marriage. Natalie didn’t know what had changed her sister’s demeanor.

  Perhaps it was knowing that there was someone out there who worshipped the ground she walked on, as her husband so clearly did. But Natalie found that she was genuinely glad for it. She wanted her sister to be happy.

  Elizabeth was still the quieter, calmer version of herself. Natalie had thought that perhaps it might be just a temporary thing. But she had truly softened after her time with Mr. Denny.

  The letters that Natalie and Elizabeth had been exchanging opened up a new friendship between them. One that Natalie was extremely grateful for.

  She and Emma had grown even closer. As Emma began to be properly courted by a few men, Natalie was grateful to be a guiding hand to her.

  And Louisa was finally going to marry. Mr. Fairchild’s aunt had at last passed, leaving him his inheritance.

  It had transformed her sister. Louisa was still soft and quiet, more content to talk quietly or listen than dance or play. But she glowed now.

  Natalie had not realized how unhappy her sister was until she saw Louisa now, truly happy. She was smiling all of the time. She had more energy. Now that she could at last be with the man she loved it was like she had new life.

  Natalie knew how she felt. Once she knew that John loved her in return…the very air felt cleaner. It felt easier to breathe. She was inclined to be kinder to everybody.

  It was a wonderful thing, to love and be loved.

  John’s face when he saw her walk up to join him at the altar made her breath catch in her throat.

  He looked at her all the time now—or more likely he always had and she was only now seeing it. But he looked at her with such open adoration on his face.

  He laughed easily at her jokes and teased her in return. He arranged for them to spend part of the year in London so that she might be social. He gave her gifts and told her how beautiful she looked.

  And yet when he looked at her as she came to stand with him in the church it was as though he was seeing her for the first time.

  She still remembered that moment. When they were at the masquerade ball and she had bumped into him by accident. They had locked eyes.

  He had this look of awe on his face then. And the look that was on his face now was similar but had a layer of love to it. For now he was not simply stunned by a pretty girl. He was stunned by the woman he loved.

  Natalie smiled at him. She took in every inch of him.

  She did not know what else the future held. The year had been so turbulent. From nearly losing the family’s money and reputation, to gaining it all back in one night. From a surprise engagement that first left her euphoric and then despairing. Then took her all the way back to euphoric again.

  She could not possibly guess what would happen after this day. But she did not want to guess.

  She was happy with the idea of being surprised. For the man in front of her loved her and she loved him. They would be together and united. And that was all that mattered to her.

  They said the vows, and she thought she saw Bridget crying. All of her sisters married or close to it. Bridget must be ecstatic and terribly relieved. All of the worry and work she had put into them for over a decade had paid off.

  Her father most certainly cried. But then she supposed she ought to allow him that. He had thought he’d ruined the family. Then by a stroke of odd luck his actions led to three of his daughters finding husbands.

  When she looked back later she could not for the life of her remember saying or doing anything during the ceremony. She knew that she must have, of course. But it was as though she was floating on a cloud. Everything was instinctive. All she could think of, all that she could focus on, was John’s face.

  He later confessed to her that he had been in a similar state. It was still rare of him to express his happiness so openly. Although they were working on that. But in that moment he seemed not to care that everyone could see him smiling.

  And then the words came from the vicar:

  “You may kiss the bride.”

  And so they did.

  The Extended Epilogue

  Engaging Love

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  Saving Lady Abigail

  Prologue

  “I just don’t understand how you could have done this without discussing it with me first,” the Earl of Gilchrist said to his only son.

  “I am twenty-six years of age, Father; I don’t need your permission to purchase a commission,” Lord Colton Frasier, the Viscount Dunthorpe, responded.

  “But how could you have possibly purchased a lieutenant’s commission on the allowance given? I understand that it would normally be rather sufficient, but you so often spend yours at the gentlemen’s club or on races.”

  Lord Gilchrist was not the type of man to be angered or raise his voice. The most emotion he ever showed to others was the furrowing of his soft blonde brows and declarations of the impossibility of an action he didn’t agree with.

  “As you said, Father, my allowance is sufficient. I have grown bored with both the tables and the races. I want to experience some of life. I would have thought I chose a noble course.”

  “Noble? Are you not aware that we are in the midst of a war with Napoleon? What is so noble about my only son dying on the battlefield?”

  The Viscount softened his demeanor. He certainly knew this announcement to his father would stir up mixed emotions. He had yet to tell his sister or mother. Lord Dunthorpe would have liked to at least have his father on his side before that time came.

  “I am aware of the battle, Father. I can assure you that as a lieutenant, and with an earldom in my future, I will be sure to take the proper precautions necessary.”

  Lord Dunthorpe got up from his leather seat and paced his father’s office.

  “I want to see some of the world, Father," he said, waving his arms around him. “I want to have experiences and adventures. It is not fair that such things should be taken from me purely because I am your only son. Had you another son, it would not have mattered what adventures I wished to embrace.”

  “But you are my only son, and very dear to me for that matter,” his father retorted, still seated behind his desk.

  Lord Gilchrist knew his son was a spirited man, always hungry for the next excitement. He somewhat wished he was more like his sister, Lady Louisa. She was perpetually quiet and reserved. Where Lord Dunthorpe jumped before he thought, Lady Louisa always profoundly
considered before she even spoke.

  “I suppose what is done is done,” Lord Gilchrist said, laying his weathered hands upon the oak desk in front of him. “I will never say I agree with this choice but, as you said, you are a grown man and able to make your own decisions.”

  Lord Dunthorpe sat down in relief. Perhaps with his father now surrendered to his choice it would be easier to tell the rest of the household.

  “I thought perhaps that I might announce it to Mother and Louisa this evening at dinner.”

  “Why so soon?”

  “I leave at the end of the week, Father. There is a great need at this time for willing and capable men.”

  Lord Gilchrist gave out a long sigh. He would have rather liked some time to adjust to his son’s new course in life.

  In all honesty, Lord Gilchrist rather hoped that Colton would be forced to consider the choice he made before going straight into it. So often, his only son was prone to making rash decisions, but he would soon see rational reason if given the time.

  “I suppose you hoped that with coming here and telling me first in private, I might ease the blow to the others,” Lord Gilchrist said with a shuffling of papers on his desk. “I cannot promise that will be the case.”

  “But think of Mother,” Lord Dunthorpe said with an ease of charming manipulation. “She will be so frightened at the prospect. If you support me, she will be assured that it is safe. I would ask for your agreement only for the sake of her nerves.”

  “You are using the delicate nature of a lady to support your own devilish devices, and I don’t think I particularly like that,” Lord Gilchrist retorted.