BAD APPLE: The Complete Series (Parts 1-5)

by Kristina Weaver

  “Have you heard from Lena?” she interrupts excitedly, making me roll my eyes and grin.

  “Yeah. Feliks finally found out what she was doing with the Romanovs and dragged her home with him. He spanked her ass. I think. I don’t wanna know what the fuck those two freaks do in the bedroom. But yeah. He got her taken care of, and as far as I know, from what Mama told me, Feliks got the FBI what they needed and told Lena in no uncertain terms that she was his. They’re talking Vegas and a house beside Mama so Max can visit her daily.”

  I love that, knowing that from all this mess, Misha accomplished one thing that he wanted to. If I know Feliks, and I do from some of the nasty, way-too-personal shit he insists on telling me daily, he’ll have Lena pregnant and too tied up (literally) to get into any more trouble.

  “About us—”

  “Can we take things slow? I need some time to get used to the idea of being in another relationship and—”

  I pin her to the sofa and come over her, shoving my hips between her legs and grinding my dick into her.

  “No. No slow. No dating and all that other shit that normal people do when they’re trying to score and fuck each other. You and me and this peanut, we’re it for each other, so you may as well know now that I called Mama earlier and told her we’re engaged.”

  “You, you told Mama we’re engaged!” she yells, bucking beneath me violently.

  If she weren’t already pregnant, she would be soon.

  “How could you do that, Leo? Oh God. She’s never gonna stop now, you know that, right?” she huffs, the wind going out of her sails as she stops yanking on my hair and looks up at me through narrowed eyes.

  “I love you, Tat.”

  “Doves,” she says, her lips twitching.

  “Doves, sweetheart?”

  “And flamingos. And I want Ri to make the fucking cake, because no way will I have dry cake at my own wedding.”

  I’m laughing and grinning as she rears up and seals our lips.

  See? I was right. Just take what you want.

  Chapter Five

  Irina

  Tatiana’s in a great mood this morning. I’m talking so great, she’s been dancing across the shop and sexually harassing customers with her groove moves since Leo walked her in here at six and planted a huge one on her. I’m talking R-rated stuff that made my already screaming junk yell in need.

  I am so happy for her right now that I hardly feel any guilt or disloyalty to Luka at all. Well, maybe a smidge, but when Leo ran back in not five minutes later, dragged her into my office and didn’t come out till that poor woman screamed the place down…I’m really happy for them.

  Me? Not so much since I woke up this morning to a hormonal mess of a man who has backslid into his old non-talkative ways. Not that I blame Misha. Learning that your kid could still be alive, while also trying to ferret out the bad seeds in my security, must be taking a toll on him. Especially when I demanded to go to work to escape his moody ass.

  I’m not complaining. Feliks is here, sitting in the corner with a paper, coffee, and a very visible gun, and apparently it’s my day to get to know Lena.

  She’s a freak who hasn’t stopped smiling and joking around since they got here.

  I don’t want to know how that smile got on her face, but I gotta say, I like Misha’s little sister now that I don’t hate her freaking guts, or in my case, wanna cry because she was a big meanie.

  “Bounce, bounce, bounce, bounce, bounce, bounce that love trunk.”

  “Oh for God’s sake, would someone please tell Tatiana to stop singing in that vile voice of hers!” Nik screams.

  I look over at the woman and I swear I see the dark cloud of doom hanging over her as she practically throws change at a customer and snarls at the next, a poor little old lady—she can’t be a day under seventy—gingerly steps up and points a shaking finger at the quiche behind Nik.

  “Stop scaring Mrs. V and get over your shit, Nik!” Liza yells, shoving the Grim Creeper out of the way to smile at the old gal. “You don’t want that eggy mess, do you? Do you?” she coos. For some reason, Liza talks to all the aged in a baby voice that makes even me shrink and want to hide.

  “I-I would, dear. My Jacob loves quiche and—”

  “I’ll get you some of the fudge cake, sweetie,” Liza cuts in, her voice going even more cooey.

  “But, dear, Jacob is diabetic.”

  “Not to worry. It tastes so good, he won’t even mind the coma.”

  God help me. They’re all completely nuts. I think I may be the only sane one left, and that’s saying a lot since I carried on an entire conversation with my toothbrush this morning when no sex came my way.

  The only non-commitable one, for sure, is Angelica, but she’s not far behind. She’s making savory goods in my shop. She must be suicidal.

  “Liza, give her the fucking quiche and move on already. I am not looking to kill a sweet little old man just yet. Nikita, either grow a pair and call Vadim or get the hell over it! Tatiana, stop singing indecent songs in the shop and learn some freaking Rihanna before my ears start bleeding. If you’re gonna broadcast to the world that you got laid, at least do it with recognizable lyrics!”

  Cue chirping crickets as everyone freezes on the spot and swivels to stare at me—shocked, awed, and I think a little afraid when I finally stop raging and yelling and burst into tears.

  Feliks is the first one on me and I cry louder when he just pulls me into his chest and starts crooning some bullshit that makes absolutely no sense but has the desired effect and calms me almost instantly.

  “Baby? You okay? You just yelled at people, Rini.”

  “No shit.” I sniffle, wiping my leaky nose on his shirt with relish.

  Feliks swallows and shudders but keeps hold of me as he tilts my chin up.

  “Talk.”

  He leads me to a table in the far corner and pushes me into a seat, shooing Nik away after she plonks a mug of tea in front of me and glares.

  “I want to kill Mina.”

  He looks shocked, and I know why. This isn’t me. I once baked an entire apple pie for the mother of the kid who bullied me in the fourth grade.

  I felt I had to. Luka broke his leg for daring to hurt me and his mama was not happy. The poor woman tried to get to Luka and me, but met Mama instead and all I can say is she wasn’t hospitalized because my papa knows Mama’s temper. Plus, she was too scared to press charges when she found out who Papa is.

  So I baked her a pie and sat with her for an hour while she cried and apologized for her kid’s behavior.

  That’s me.

  But wanting to murder another person?

  “Uh, come again?” Feliks wheezes, his smile dropping when I don’t bat an eyelash and instead just meet his eyes directly and with determination.

  “She needs to go, Feliks. She’s messing with my family and she needs to fucking go,” I grit out.

  “Rini…this is not…”

  He’s lost for words and I get it. I know how our family justice system works, and while I’ve never agreed with it, I now see the benefits of it. I just do not have time for the whole evidence and judgement thing.

  “Right? You have no idea what’s happening right now, Feliks, so don’t you dare judge me. She’s making Misha miserable. She’s making me miserable, and for all I know—”

  “Misha told me everything last night on the phone, baby. I know what’s happening. I’m helping him find her, if she even exists, Irina. I know. But that doesn’t mean I agree with you right now. Think, baby. Mina is protected. We move on her and we’re all up shit creek. Let Misha do his thing and gather evidence against her.”

  “You mean meet with her on the sly?”

  Yeah, I know about that, well at least I had my suspicions, which are confirmed when Feliks gasps and goes white as a sheet.

  Liza told me she spotted him and Mina meeting for lunch in one of those swanky rich people hotels uptown. Why Liza was even there is a mystery, though from her
blush she was getting shafted. Literally.

  “Baby.”

  “Don’t you baby me, Feliks. I am sick and tired of this shit. First I get to see her tongue down his throat, then I get stabbed, almost stabbed again, and now this shit. I’m about at the end of my rope here. I have never cursed so much or wanted to kill as much as I have since I married Misha, and I swear, if this isn’t done soon I will personally pour holy water on that asshole’s head and shove a cross up her evil ass before sending her to hell where she belongs.”

  Apparently Feliks does not know when to quit, because instead of giving me what I want, he starts fidgeting and visibly and audibly says a prayer of thanks when my husband strides in and picks me up, his face thunderous as he shoulders his way into the kitchen, greets Angelica, and slams my office door shut.

  “Right.”

  I land on the cot with a huff and scrunch my nose. Dammit, if he bugged our home, I should have known he’d bug this place, too.

  “You will not talk about killing anyone, and you will cease that vile language right fucking now!”

  “Oh yeah? And why is that, Misha? Why should I stop being this way when just this morning I came to work to hear about how my husband, you know, that guy who apparently is married to me, is running around meeting with Mina—the ugly, hideous crone? You wanna know how much I enjoyed that conversation or how everyone looked at me like I was one step away from a meltdown?”

  Misha glares at me, the tiny lines around his eyes seeming deeper as he finally sighs and runs a hand through his long hair.

  “I didn’t want you to know until I had something, Irina.”

  “Know what, Misha?” I ask, coming to my feet with a frown. “That you’re meeting with the woman who could or could not have taken your kid and faked her death? Meeting with the one person on this planet who rubs me the wrong way?”

  “I am not cheating on you,” he says, his eyes hard and unyielding with his anger.

  “I know that! I freaking know that, you big dummy. That’s not what I’m worried about, and you should already know that. How are you doing this without wanting to kill her, Misha? How can you sit across the table from her and pretend not to despise her when we both know you’d like nothing more than to kill her? I don’t need this shit right now, Misha! I’m pregnant, hormonal, and being guarded twenty-four seven. I have enough stress without worrying that you’re gonna end up in prison or killed by the other families.”

  I shouldn’t yell at him right now. The man’s stressed enough as it is and hanging on to his sanity by a fingernail, but I have my own pressures and worries and he’s not making things any easier to deal with.

  My Misha is strong and commanding, but the man has one of those heated toilet seats for his precious ass. He won’t make it a day in prison, and that’s without one of the other prisoners coming after him, if you know what I mean.

  “Goddammit. I didn’t mean to worry you, angel. I just need to get this done and she’s the only way,” he says eventually, falling down onto the cot and pulling me onto his chest.

  “How’s that? Because as far as I can tell, you’ve been meeting with her for weeks now and you have nothing to use against her, Misha. She’s too smart to let anything slip.”

  But she is a woman. My mouth curves as a thought hits me, takes hold, and starts growing fungus.

  “She will slip eventually, or Tony will make a move.”

  Men. They’re idiots.

  “She won’t and he won’t and we’ll be at this for the next hundred years at this rate. But I know how to get this show on the road.”

  “Nyet.”

  “You haven’t even heard what I have to say yet.” I try to push myself away and give up when he just holds me down and continues to stroke my hair.

  “I don’t need to know, I heard your bloodthirsty ass minutes ago, and I do not trust you in this. You’re so sweet, I almost had a stroke when I heard that,” he mutters.

  “I’m not gonna kill her. Gross, and unfair of you to point out one little slip when I had a hormone rage. I simply want to goad her into letting something slip,” I wheedle.

  “You will not go near her.”

  He says so, but they can’t guard me all day every day, and with the crew I have on my side, I can be out of here and going Pacino on Mina before they know I’m gone.

  All I have to do is lose the ring with the tracker in it, my watch, my phone, and possibly change clothes since I wouldn’t put it past Misha to bug those, too.

  “Fine.” I’ll pray for forgiveness later, Lord, I swear. “I’ll chill. On one condition. Get Vadim to make things right with Nik. Please. She’s been insufferable lately, and if I have to see Lincoln trying to paw her ass again, I’ll rip my own eyes out.”

  “Good. Now you’re still peaky from this morning, angel?” he purrs suggestively, rolling me beneath him and coming up above me.

  Chapter Six

  Irina

  Operation Ninja Stealth Mode is a go.

  Nik wanted to call it This Bitch Going Down, Tatiana just kept giggling and sexting Leo, and Liza—my dear, bloodthirsty, slightly insane Elizaveta—wanted to forego a proper naming ceremony and just get one of her brother-in-law’s guns and go show her “my leetle fren,” or whatever.

  I’m just happy Angelica has our cover story down, and thanks to Mama Novac, we have a location on where to find Mina.

  “Shh. Stop gabbing and go make sure the coast is clear,” Nik hisses at poor Tatty as we all stand beside the sink with the faucet running as Lena and Angelica peek out the door to check on Feliks.

  “You stop. You’ve turned into a real asshole lately and I don’t even know why since Vadim finally came clean and divorced that wife of his.”

  “He’s not divorced yet, and that doesn’t matter. He boinked me while he was married, made me ‘the other woman,’ and refused to even cuddle. He’s a dick,” Nik hisses back, making me roll my eyes.

  We all know she’s all pining and stuff, so this hatred thing is such a fail.

  “Get over it. The man loves you. He left his wife and risked retribution from her father because he couldn’t let you go. He deserves to at least be heard before you let another guy stick his dick in you, you slut,” Tatiana says.

  Nik’s eyes go glacial, and I watch as she reaches over to Tat’s snack pack—it’s more like a full picnic—and shoves it to the floor, spelling a tray’s worth of cake and chocolate chip cookies to the floor.

  Poor Tat’s lip starts trembling and she’s all glassy-eyed and whimpering before I can rush over and rescue her little snack from the floor.

  “I’m telling Leo.”

  “Boohoo, crybaby. You think I’m afraid of Leo?” she sneers back, her eyes a little shifty as guilt starts eating at her.

  “You should be. He almost broke Luka’s jaw for looking at me wrong.”

  “You think it’s sexy to have the father of your child beat up?”

  Okay, definitely time to stop this civil war before it starts.

  “Guys—”

  “No! But you know what I do find sexy? The fact that Leo loves me enough to do it when Luka keeps coming around, no matter how many times I’ve begged him not to, and just yesterday I saw him with Anne!”

  Anne is one of Nik’s ex-besties from way back. Things did not end well with them when Nik caught her in her bed, screwing her husband. Not that Nik was all heartbroken or anything since her old man was gross—on the inside, at least. On the outside he was pretty hot.

  It sort of killed the friendship and Nik hates her so much that I swear she still has murder dreams about her.

  “Anne? Anne?”

  “Yes. Seriously, what did I see in the guy anyways? It looked like he was trying to taste her ovaries. From her throat. Gross. No offense, Ri.”

  “None taken.”

  It’s true. Luka’s cool, but I’ve seen him kiss one of his many ‘buddies’ and no one should use that much tongue. Except Misha. His tongue is magical.

 
“That little asshole.”

  “Ya think,” Tat grumbles, her tears magically evaporating when Nik grimaces and gives her version of an apology. A freaking back pat.

  “I just, I don’t know how to be all ‘you’re forgiven’ and stuff when it hurt so much. And for your information, I am not doing Lincoln. The man’s a whore. A nice one, but a whore, nonetheless. I’d get crabs just by looking at his wanger.”

  “Um, he’s like my cousin,” I point out when Lena comes back with the thumbs-up and we hustle towards the emergency exit.

  “So? He called himself a picky whore just last night.” Nik giggles.

  “Back to the topic at hand,” I mutter as we creep down the alley and Liza does this weird tuck-and-roll thing that I would envy if not for the fact that it’s like urine central on that asphalt.

  Delilah, my little pink guilty pleasure, is sitting right where Nik parked her, away from prying eyes and eagle-eyed husbands, and I greet her with tears and some stroking that is positively indecent.

  “Hewo, my wittle baby. Did you miss Mama? Huh, did you?”

  The eye rolls do not bug me one bit as I slide into her cracking, stick-me-in-the-ass seats and stroke her dash like a long-lost lover.

  Misha won’t let me drive, anywhere, since I’m in danger and all. To make matter worse, he’s going all dick-tator on me and insisting I drive the freaking Merc he bought me.

  Never!

  “I didn’t cheat on you with that trollop, baby, Mama swears. I haven’t so much as looked at her since he got her.”

  “Stop it. You’re embarrassing me. For you,” Liza groans as I keep sweet-talking her before pulling out the choke and going through the fine seduction ritual to get the pink demon purring just right for her mama.

  She splutters to life with a wheeze that’s like sweet music to my ears and jerks forward, slamming Nik’s head against the dash.

  “You were mean to her, weren’t you?” I accuse.