Shattered Skies: Beginning's End

by Heather Linn

  As soon as he said the words my heart crushed and I became instantly jealous. How was it even possible for me to feel jealousy towards a dead girl? “I know, and I have told you her blood is on my hands. At least I know why he hates me. It is easier to understand now. Thank you Jaden.”

  “Cat I wasn’t talking about Jewel, I was talking about you.”

  “What are you talking about? Darien and I are best friends and nothing more. Jewel was supposed to be his mate. They were going to have a family and grow old together and I took that away from them.” I didn’t want to believe what Jaden was saying. I could handle an angry Darien if he was angry for the right reasons.

  “You weren’t there Cat. During the last two days, he has done nothing but mourn, and I have been there for all of it. When we thought it was you in there screaming he went mad. He was ready to go in and try to save you even if it meant certain death for everyone. When I wouldn’t let him go, he screamed and fought and I was pretty sure he wanted to die with you. I have never seen anything like it. When you showed up, it was like he did a complete turnaround. You told him about Jewel and his reaction was nothing like how he reacted when he thought you had died. I know it is awful, but he was glad it wasn’t you that died.”

  “He hasn’t lost me, I am still here.” I could tell by the look on Jaden’s face that he wanted to say something else but knew that he shouldn’t.

  “He has lost you Cat. He will never have all of you now because you have given a piece of yourself to that monster in there. I don’t know you even a little compared to how well Darien knows you, but every time Akia’s name is mentioned, you light up. I know if I can see it, he can see it too and it’s eating him alive.” I couldn’t find the energy to argue with him. I turned and tried to walk away, but Jaden grabbed me by the arm before I made it too far.

  “I wasn’t done Cat.” I was not sure that I could take anymore, I really wasn’t.

  “He has been beating himself up trying to decide how to tell you and I can't deal with him any longer. He underestimates you; he loves you, and sees you differently than the rest of us do. He thinks that you need to be protected and taken care of but I know the real you. I see that look in your eyes every time that you talk about killing a monster. You are stronger than any of us could ever be, Cat.”

  I didn't think that I could handle any more revelations tonight. Darien had never had any problem telling me anything, and if things were so bad now that he couldn't, I wasn't sure that I wanted to know. “Look Jaden, I don't want to know what you think. I am sure it’s just your way of making an excuse for why Darien is acting like he is. He knows damn well that I didn't have sex with Akia, or Akia would be dead. Darien is just saying things to massage his bruised ego. I am giving up worrying about other people; it doesn't fix anything. It won't bring anyone back, so if he wants to act like that, it’s fine with me.” I knew how ugly I sounded. I was throwing a tantrum, but I couldn’t help it. Darien wasn’t the only one in pain.

  “Cat, stop it! Stop feeling sorry for yourself. It isn't helping right now. I wouldn't tell you anything if I didn't think the mission might depend on it. I don't know if his mood is permanent or if it will wear off,” and he stopped and looked at me.

  I should have cursed and stomped off when he accused me of feeling sorry for myself. In fact, I was pretty sure from the look in his eyes that part of him was hoping that I would do just that and let him off the hook. It was his hopeful look though, that made me decide that I was going to stay and hear him out. I never got to take the easy way out it; it was only fair that he wouldn’t get to either.

  “Well what are you waiting for? Tell me Jaden; I don't think that anything that might come out of your mouth can top what I have already been through tonight, but if you think it can then let’s hear it.”

  “You know what Cat? If you want to be self-destructive then I will help you. We found a notebook. We didn't know what it was until we opened it and started to read it. It was something of Doctor Walker's that somehow they missed when they were ransacking the place. I don't know how they missed it, but the fact that they did is why we are all still standing here. Doc was stupid and lax with his notes Cat. He called us all by our names in his notes instead of numbers like he was supposed to.” Jaden was rambling now and it was pissing me off, not to mention that now I knew that they had gone back to base after the others were killed. That was stupid but I would save that lecture for another day.

  “Look, I have to go play babysitter and talk Darien down so we can go in there and get Dr. Walker out. Can we please get on with this?” I said. “The night is growing old and we are running out of time.” I was in no mood to hear that Dr. Walker had done something else wrong; in my opinion everything he’d done was wrong.

  “Tough as nails as always huh, Cat? I was trying to lessen the blow but apparently you and your brass balls can handle anything. One of the pages was about you. You have too much Dominus blood running through your veins now. When the King of darkness shared his blood with you, he destroyed your usefulness to us. Apparently Dr. Walker didn’t know how to break the news to you so he just told you that he didn’t know if the effects were permanent or not. You can't kill them anymore Cat; not with sex anyway. Your blood matches theirs; in fact it is so much of a match that he couldn’t understand why the blood lust hasn’t hit you yet.”

  OK, he proved me wrong; I had just heard something worse. I had to sit down. I didn't think my legs would hold me up any longer. My first thought took me back to the day before when it took every ounce of will power that I had not to drink Akia’s blood from the wound on his neck that I had made. I had forgotten all about my yearning to drink blood in the mix of everything else. What the hell was I coming to?

  “Cat, it said right in his notes that he didn't fully know what the match meant in the long run. He said that he was going to have to do some tests and see. No human has ever swapped as much blood with one of them without turning completely. The more he wrote, the more he started to doubt himself. Eventually, he wrote that maybe you were never human to begin with. You puzzle him. He didn't know if the change was coming for you and it was going slowly because your body was in shock protecting itself from the truth or if you would soon develop all of their characteristics.” Jaden paused and like an athlete resting, he spit on the ground. He looked at me and went on.

  “I think he was wrong Cat. You are just as human as I am. I feel that. That is another reason why we need to get Doc out of there so he can help you. I am sorry. No matter what happens, you are still one of us and I will stick by you.” I felt like falling and teetered back but Jaden was there to catch me. The big problem being that I didn’t want to be caught. I just wanted to be let alone to fall forever, away from all I’d been told.

  “I promise it will be OK Cat. We are not going to let anything happen to you.” His voice was soothing and innocent. Jaden would have made a great father if the monsters hadn’t taken his mate too. The fact that he still cared enough to pledge to help me made me realize that this man was probably the gentlest soul I knew. I didn’t want to be more of a freak than the monsters. I wanted to believe what Jaden believed about me so I did; after all, what other choice did I have?

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  “Darien, where are you? Stop hiding and get out here so we can go get Dr. Walker and get out alive.” I didn’t have time to feel sorry for myself and I’d be damned if I was going to let Darien get us all killed because he was pitying himself instead of working with the rest of us.

  “I am over here and I am not hiding from anyone; especially not you Cat. You are not worth the energy it would take to hide from you.”

  Good, he was angry. I was better with anger than I was with jealousy when it came to handling Darien. “Fine, great, you are not hiding. I am not here to argue with you. Whatever it is that you were doing, you were wasting precious time. We have to get the Doc out of there and then decide what’s next. There isn't any time for me to nurse your wo
unds right now. We have to go and save the Doc, if there’s anything left to save. He wasn’t looking good earlier Darien. We can talk this over later, once we have Dr. Walker free and clear.”

  “It won’t be that easy this time Cat. There are no words that can fix it this time. I have to tell you something and I don't want to have to say the words out loud because if I do, it makes them real.”

  It wasn't hurt in his voice anymore; it was something that I never expected to hear. It was disgust. We didn’t have time for him to do this now; I wasn’t going to let him. With everything that I had been through, I didn’t need to hear more from him. More importantly, I didn’t think I could stand to hear more from him. I was barely hanging on to my sanity; if he started on me might be the final push and my sanity could go out the window.

  “You know what? Save your damn breath Darien; Jaden already told me. You know I have to be honest with you, Jaden was way better at hiding the disgust in his voice. If I do become a monster, that’s life, and if you want me gone because you can't stand to be around me because of what I might be, then that is fine too. Why not get what you have always wanted? Fuck me and I will die. You’d win either way, that way! Right now, I am asking you to work with me to get Dr. Walker out of that palace and then I will go, or we will get it on for days or however you want to do it. I don’t care anymore. I know what you think about the monsters; I know what we all think. If you can't live with me as one them if that happens, then I won’t stay around. I won’t even live any more if that will make it up to you. I didn’t betray you on purpose Darien, and if you are too upset to see that, I understand. I will be the bigger person because I love you. I forgive you Darien. Hate me if you want, but I forgive you. Now get up and let’s get moving.”

  I had known him my whole life and he was just going to toss me away for something that I couldn’t control. I didn't think that my heart had any pieces left that were big enough to hurt, but I was wrong. For half a second I truly braced myself. I had never up until this point believed that you could die of a broken heart, but now I wasn’t so sure.

  “Is that what you think?” He spoke so low I was barely able to hear him.

  “What did you say? We have to go Darien. We don't have time for this.”

  He wasn’t moving, and I couldn’t move him. If we didn’t get Dr. Walker out of there tonight he would be lost. He was a Vampire; he couldn’t live in the sunlight and by tomorrow night it would be too late. All of the excuses that Dr. Walker had constantly used to make us stay underground suddenly started to make sense.

  “I said is that what you think this is all about Cat? That I am disgusted at the thought of you becoming a monster and that is why I am acting this way? Well I have news for you, Cat. I would love you no matter what you were. You could be standing over the top of me strangling the life out of me and my last words would be I love you. I am pissed because at least when there wasn't a chance that you could sleep with him, I knew you could never truly be with him. Now as sure as I am standing here, I feel like I don't stand a chance because sleep with him, you can. I have spent my life waiting for the right moment to tell you how I feel about you and now how I feel doesn’t matter a bit. I just keep thinking, maybe if I had told you sooner it would have been different. If I had only gotten to you at that ball, none of this would have happened. But instead I let my guard down for two seconds, and in those two seconds, I lost my reason for living. I would do anything to give you the life you deserve Cat, and now I have no chance. You own my heart Cat, you always have. Bu you know what? Right now? Right now I wish you were dead Cat. As horrible as that sounds, I wish you were dead. There would be nothing left for me to do if you were dead. Then I could die in peace too. But no, now I have to spend the rest of my life knowing that your heart belongs to Akia and not to me.”

  My mouth was still on the ground when I finally realized Darien had left. I hadn’t even noticed that he had stormed off in the direction of Jaden and left me sitting there all alone. Life just keeps getting better and better. You would think losing most of your family would be enough stress for one day, but then again, it wasn't me unless chaos met me at every corner.

  Chapter Twenty-Six

  When I made my way back to Jaden and Darien, they were already dressed for battle. In another situation, I would be laughing at the two of them. It was like they had stepped from a bad spy movie. It was even funnier because with the same type of clothes and masks hiding their faces, I couldn't tell who was who. I have known them for years and I had never taken the time to realize they were so close in build. It took me another minute to finally figure out who was who. Darien was the one that wouldn't make eye contact with me.

  “Wow, Jaden, the costumes are a little cliché don't you think?”

  He was wearing a black body suite, black jeans, that if I didn’t know better, would have had to have been painted on to be that tight, and his outfit was topped by a black ski mask. They were both looking hot; if the basement had been full of female Dominus guards, the two of them would have easily created enough of a distraction for me to grab the Doc and escape.

  “Listen Miss Fashionista, this was the most functional thing I could find on short notice. Besides, I would be lying if I said that I wasn't looking forward to seeing your cute little ass stuffed into your suit, which, by the way, isn’t made out of denim. I opted for the one piece full leather body suit for you, Cat. I am too tired to try to imagine what’s underneath your jeans, so I thought I would just cut out the guess work and give my imagination a rest and my eyes a treat.”

  The wink and the smile from Jaden was all it took to make me laugh again in what seemed like a century. Wait, with everything that had happened, was it OK to laugh? I knew that it felt good to laugh and right now keeping myself sane was all that mattered.

  “You have always been quite the charmer you know that?” I said. Jaden let out a little howl.

  “Let’s get this show on the road guys. Let’s go get the Doc and get out of this nut bag town.”

  For some reason, the thought of leaving and never seeing Akia again made my heart flutter. If just the thought of leaving made my heart jump, then I was in more trouble than I thought possible. I just brushed the flutter off as I had every other sensation that came with my encounters with the Regent. He said that he wasn’t using his powers on me, but I didn’t know if I could trust him. How in the world could I know if he was telling the truth or not? If I had known Doctor Walker all my life and I couldn’t tell that he had been lying, what made me think that I could believe Akia the human hater? He already wanted to kill me, and he didn’t even know it was human blood that he so desperately wanted to spill.

  “You need to get your head in the game and stop thinking about your boyfriend or you are going to get us all killed,” said Darien, correctly guessing the reason for the far off look in my eyes.

  I didn’t respond to him. I didn’t know what to say. To say that I wasn’t thinking about Akia would be a lie that Darien would see right through. I silently swore to myself that I would fix things between the two us. Somehow I would make him understand what I felt for Akia and what I felt for him. Hell, Darien was smart enough when he wasn’t being an ass. If Akia had brainwashed me, Darien would be able to tell. I ignored him and turned to give the thumbs up sign to team leader Jaden, and then we were up and running toward the castle long before Darien had the chance to launch another barbed word at me.

  Once we got closer to the palace gate, I went over what I had learned. I told them about the overworked guard that was disgruntled enough to ignore the details of his job. If the guard took off again, Darien and Jaden could barricade the hallway to the room where the Doc was chained. I would work on breaking the locks that held him. A barricade wouldn’t hold the Dominus off for long, but it might earn us the extra minute that stood between escape and death for all of us.

  The window that had been unlocked earlier was still unlocked. Trained monkeys would make a better security force for
Akia. I would have to tell him that the next time I saw him. Then it hit me like a ton of bricks that there wouldn’t be a next time. I pushed the thought aside and grabbed Darien’s hand and let him help me down through the window. He still wasn’t looking at me, which worried me; not because I didn’t know for sure if our friendship was repairable, but because you had to be alert and in sync when you were working as a team, and he and I were pretty far from in sync. Just as we had hoped Dr. Walker had been left unattended between shifts; so, so far so good. I kept repeating over and over in my mind that this was going to work out. I had to believe that; something had to go right eventually. The plan was simple enough. All I had to do was take the key off the new guard, and if he was as lax about his job as Dr. Walker had indicated, then it should be easier than taking candy from a human baby.

  There was no way that the guys could get the key. If either of them were spotted before the key was in my hands, we would all be dead. Akia had told me that all the guards were ordered to give me free roam of the palace. Unless Akia had told them differently since he and I had last spoken, no one would question why I was down there. I had to appear more sexy and less criminal, so I took off the mask and stuck it in my pocket. I shook out my hair and turned to make sure Darien and Jaden were out of sight. They were and it was time for me make my magic work. I would be kidding myself if I said I didn’t get off on the fear that was involved in any mission. When you know death is the price you pay if you get caught, the adrenaline rush is amazing. I read in a book once that in battle you feel you are most alive right before you die; it was easy to see why. You were tempting fate and putting your life in her hands and the feeling was indescribable.

  I had nearly made it to Dr. Walker’s door when I ran into the new guard. It was Drake and Drake was enough to stop me in my tracks. He couldn’t have been the guard that Dr. Walker had told me about earlier. This monster was too good at his job. In fact, I was sure that he was the best that Akia had. I had to think fast. Drake didn’t like me at all and no amount of flirting was going to alter his opinion. I had to rely on the fact that the guys where boarding up the entrance, and I had to trust my instincts and change my plans on the spot. Drake was too smart to be fooled by the pouty lipped doe eyed expression that I had been prepared to use.