Killian

by E. A. Weston

  Walking inside, I don’t see her, but the guy behind the counter waves at me. I still don’t know his name. I really should get to know more people. Taking a seat by the window, I wait for my coffee. I don’t notice Athena sitting down opposite me until she touches my hand.

  “Good morning, Reagan.” She smiles at me.

  “Hi, Athena.” I can’t even manage a smile for her. My thoughts are all-consuming.

  “Why do you look sad, baby?” she asks me, reaching into her bag.

  “Nothing. Just thinking about my mom and dad.” At least, that’s part of it. She nods her head, giving me a sympathetic smile as she pats my knee. Our coffees arrive, but I don’t get up to leave yet. I just sit, staring at them.

  “Do you need to talk to me?” she asks, holding her tarot cards in her hand.

  “No, thanks. I need to get back with these.” Grabbing the coffees, I say goodbye, leaving her watching after me. I drive back to the apartment, finding Killian in the shower. I leave his coffee on the counter with a note telling him I am going for a walk. Walking through the small wooded area, I sit on the grass before taking the letter out of my purse. I turn it over in my hands a few times. I want to rip it open and devour the words, but I also want to savor them. Using my index finger, I gently tear along the top, freeing the paper inside. As I unfold it, fear and excitement race through me.

  I immediately recognize my mom’s handwriting and brush my fingers over her words before I read them. Just holding the paper allows me to feel closer to her. She too once held it in her hands, writing a letter to me. I wonder if she was sitting at the kitchen table or out on the back patio when she wrote it. She did like to be out there where dad planted hundreds of flowers for her, their sweet scent floating into the house.

  * * *

  My dearest Reagan,

  How I miss you so, my most beautiful daughter. If you are reading this letter, then I am filled with joy, only I hope it is not too late. I fear I have set the course of your destiny off balance for I have been a most selfish mother. I remained with you longer than I was supposed to. I did not have the heart to leave you when was deemed. I held on to you for a few years longer. Please forgive me.

  It breaks our hearts to have to leave you so soon. Your father is beside himself with worry and grief, as am I. However, it must be done. It is your destiny, Reagan. I hope that this letter finds you in love with your true mate. I do not know who that will be. I only know that together, you are destined for greatness. Please do not be frightened or discouraged, but follow your heart’s desire and you shall be given everything that is meant for you.

  How I long to set my eyes upon your smiling face once again.

  We love you so very much. Please do not forget us.

  Mom & Dad

  * * *

  I read the words over and over as tears stream down my face. What does she mean, destiny? What destiny allows my parents to be taken from me? Folding the paper carefully, I place it back into the envelope. Lying on the grass, I clutch it to my chest, my tears salty on my lips. My heart’s desire. What would that be? To see my mom and dad again—to have Killian all to myself. I don’t want to lose him. I know that much.

  I watch the clouds float along the clear blue sky. Their path in life is so clear; just drift on by without a care in the world. Providing shade for an instant and rain to cool the earth—quench its thirst. My eyes close as the sun warms my face and dries the tears as they fall. I wish my path in life were clear. I wish I knew what to do.

  “Why is my princess crying in the woods?” Killian’s voice is a soft melodic whisper. His thumb wipes my tears. “Don’t cry, princess.” He cradles my head in his hand, brushing soft kisses on my lips.

  “I’m not crying. The sun is making my eyes water,” I whisper back. His laugh is gentle along my jaw line.

  “Come now, princess. Would you be lying to me?” His tone is playful, and I am happy that he is trying to lighten the mood. Opening my eyes, I smile up at him, pressing my hand against his smooth cheek.

  “Tell me, princess, why so sad?”

  Holding up the letter in my other hand, I give it a small wave at him.

  “This. It only confuses me more.”

  Taking the letter, he asks if he can read it. I agree, and we both sit up. I watch his eyes scan the words over and over, his hand reaching for mine. Once he is done, he looks just as sad as I am.

  “Do you believe we are true mates, Reagan?”

  “Yes … but how can it be possible for a human and fairy to be together?” I ask, not understanding this whole situation.

  “I wish I could speak with my father again. He was a very wise Ki … Fairy. I have not told you all of the story about how I can return home.”

  “What do you mean? Can you leave any time?” I ask, panicking.

  Shaking his head, he grips my hand tighter.

  “No, I cannot leave at any time. The portal between worlds only opens with a blood ritual. But for me to return, I must have the love of my true mate, and she must return with me.”

  My eyes pop open wide as I listen to him. I have to go to fairy world with him? Crap! What the hell! How is that possible?

  “Wait, and then does this mean that I have to live there in fairy world?”

  Killian heaves a heavy sigh.

  “Avalon, Princess, and it appears that you have already been.”

  Oh, my fuckity-fuck! Is this why my mom put that picture in the box? To show me that I have already been there? To ease my mind, letting me know I don’t need to be afraid? Snatching the letter from his hand, I re-read it.

  “Follow your heart’s desire,” I read out loud, looking up at him. “Okay. I’ll go with you … because I promised, I would get you home.”

  It’s time to stop thinking about myself and my troubles. Killian has suffered far longer than I have and he deserves to be happy.

  “I do not want you to go to ease my suffering, Reagan. I want to be with you forever. If that is not possible in Avalon, then I shall stay here.”

  “We are going to Avalon,” I say, standing, making up my mind. Killian stands, facing me. I can see hope flash in his eyes and fear.

  “We will be okay. I promise.”

  I tell him of my newfound confidence, pushing the shards of my heart into the background. Killian grabs my waist, lifting me up and twirling me around. His lips shower love all over my face.

  “We need to bring some items with us. I fear I have not been home in so long, that I do not know what it may be like.”

  He rushes his words as we run back to the apartment. I watch him grab his weird stick thing and some jewelry from a secret drawer in his nightstand. My eyes nearly explode from the sight of it—the most amazing jewels you could ever imagine. I watch as he quickly changes into some leather pants and vest. Damn, he looks sexy. He puts the jewels into a pouch, securing it to his belt. He then secures a knife beside it.

  “Wow, you kind of look badass, Killian.” His head snaps up, and he smiles at me.

  “Thank you, princess, but I will not let any harm come to you, so I must prepare.”

  His words make me frown. Harm? What harm is he talking about? Once Killian gathers himself, he takes my hand in his.

  “Are you ready?” he asks, looking into my eyes. Swallowing hard, I nod as I grab my purse with the letter and photograph from my mom. I secure my fairy chain back around my neck. Killian kisses me softly then we leave the apartment. He drives us back to the spot where we had our picnic yesterday. Climbing out of the car, we walk to the tree line. Killian, like an expert sniffer dog, begins to feel the air around him. I, on the other hand, feel stupid and hope that no one can see us.

  “I can’t find it,” he says, sounding frustrated.

  “What does it look like?” I ask wanting to help.

  “You can’t really see it. It is like a shimmer in the air.”

  I look all around me but don’t see anything. The air, I guess, looks fine to me. I can feel Killian�
��s desperation, so I place my hand in his and pull him to the ground with me.

  “Okay, you need to calm down, Killian. Take a deep breath and relax,” I say, thinking back to that one yoga class I took. He nods and closes his eyes, his chest rising and falling as he relaxes. I take this time to look all around us, but nothing appears to change.

  “Is it working?” he asks.

  “No,” I whisper. Opening his eyes, he looks at me.

  “Maybe we are too late.”

  “No way, Killian. We are not giving up. I am not keeping you here in this world when you belong somewhere else.”

  “Are you telling me that you do not want to join me in Avalon?” He looks shocked.

  “I do. Of course, I do,” I tell him, reaching for his hand. “I just want you to know that I don’t expect you to stay here with me when you so desperately want to go home.”

  Killian pulls his hand from mine and stands up. He looks like I slapped him.

  “You are mine, Reagan. Forever. If you do not wish to come home with me, then please speak now—before I catch a glimpse of my world and have to say goodbye to it again.”

  “Killian, I want to go with you,” I affirm, wrapping my arms around his neck. “I want you to be happy.”

  “I will be happy wherever you are, princess. I love you and only you—above all else.”

  “I love you, too.”

  The words fall off my tongue and in that instant, I know I do. I love him. Killian stares at me for a few seconds before crushing his lips to mine.

  “Oh, princess, I love you so very much.”

  “And I love you.”

  Talking to each other with our minds is still scary but at this moment it is perfect. Killian pulls away from me, his face a mask of delight. He drops to one knee and taking my hands in his; he kisses each one.

  “Reagan, I give myself to you wholly and completely.”

  Bowing his head, he mutters something and stands again. I feel a shift within myself like a weight has been lifted from my shoulders. My eyes see clearer now, and the fairy before me is mine forever, as I am his.

  I can’t help the smile that stretches across my face. Killian picks me up, twirling me again. “You are so beautiful,” he whispers.

  “Killian!” I gasp as the air just behind us shimmers and I point to it. It looks like a still pool of water after you drop a stone into it. The ripples gradually flow outward. Killian grasps my hand tighter, and we walk over to it. He pulls the knife from his belt, flicking it open.

  “Goddess, I offer my summer blood and warrior blood and the promise to never reveal the portal. Please accept my offering and allow us entry to Avalon.”

  Killian says the words then runs the blade across his palm. Gasping, I cover my mouth as he squeezes the blood from his fist to the ground by the portal. I watch as magic happens before my eyes again. The air separates and the world beyond is dark. Killian puts one foot through, then turns to me, holding out his hand.

  My body freezes as I look at him. Do I really want to do this? Maybe I should just push him through and run.

  “Please, my love. Don’t run,” he begs, flexing his fingers for me to take. Closing my eyes, I inhale my own calming breath and reach for him. The closer I get to the portal, I feel a strong pull within myself, almost as if I were a magnet being pulled by another. Opening my eyes, Killian holds me tight, not allowing me an inch. We step through into the unknown. Killian speaks again in Fairy, and the world as I know it disappears.

  Looking around, I come face to face with a giant rock. Killian grabs me again, kissing me hard.

  “Thank you, my love. Thank you for bringing me home.”

  Chapter 23

  As we walk a little further, Killian has my hand in a death grip. We are walking through a forest, and the trees are the tallest I have ever seen, almost touching the sky.

  “What is this place?” I ask, craning my neck to see more.

  “It is the Forest of Lost Souls,” he answers.

  “Creepy.” I shiver, pressing myself closer to him. Killian stops walking. He turns to me with a big smile on his face, brushing my hair behind my ear.

  “It is the place where Fairies who have been killed or died before their time roam free. It is not creepy, but it is not ideal. We much rather go to the goddess.”

  Rolling my eyes, I lean over and kiss him. “Where are we going?” I ask, feeling a little giddy. He frowns then opens his mouth to speak, but instead, pulls me down to the ground, covering my mouth with his hand.

  “Stay quiet, princess.” He removes his hand, and we both lean up and creep toward the bough of a tree. I wait and watch as Killian surveys the area. My heart pounds and my palms sweat. After a few minutes, he takes my hand. We walk on some more then stop again.

  “What’s going on, Killian?”

  “I keep hearing an extra set of footsteps, but I am unsure. It has been a while since I trained.” He grins at me.

  We move again for a while, the darkness making it hard for me to see. I’m tired, too. Yawning, I rest against a tree while Killian moves on. Closing my eyes for a second, I rest then open them to continue. I no longer see Killian.

  “Shit,” I mumble, pushing off the tree. I try to catch him, but as soon as I step away from the tree, something cold presses against my neck.

  My body freezes. A man speaks but it’s in fairy, and I don’t understand, so I stay quiet. He says the words again, pressing the knife into my throat.

  “I don’t understand,” I croak out.

  “Killian, help!”

  I scream out in my mind, hoping to reach him. The fairy pushes me forward, all the while holding the knife to my throat. We walk onwards, and I am calling Killian, begging him to come back and find me. Why did I want to come here again?

  In a flash, a dark figure drops from above. The fairy pushes me to the ground, and I watch, horrified, as the two figures grapple and tumble over one another. The sound of hisses scare the crap out of me. As the two figures fight, one of them lands on top of the other. I see a flash of something silver and what sounds like fairy begging. I am hoping to hell that Killian is close by; I have managed to hide behind two trees and can peek out at the scene before me.

  I watch the fairies stand up and embrace. I can’t quite make out what’s happening, but I hear them laugh.

  “Princess, where are you?” Killian’s voice calls out. Stepping out of my hiding place, I walk slowly over to the figures. I see a hand outstretched towards me, so I run the last few feet, grabbing on to him.

  “What the hell? Where did you go?” I ask, slapping his chest because I feel so scared. He kisses my head and chuckles.

  “Princess, you were always in my sights. I knew I heard footsteps following us.”

  He nods to the figure standing behind me. Turning, I see another fairy and my breath hitches. Holy cow, these guys are beautiful. My eyes travel the length of him, taking in his leather clothes and sword. His hair is long, too, and his eyes are dark. Killian introduces me.

  “Reagan, this is Samiel. He is a Tenebrosi warrior and brother.”

  Samiel smiles at me, and then bows at Killian. He says something in Fairy and Samiel’s eyes dart to mine. His lips quirk into a smile.

  “What did you say?” I ask Killian once we set off again.

  “Nothing, Princess. Why?”

  “You said something to him. Why did he bow to you?” Killian winks at me, taking my hand in his.

  “You must be quiet, princess. We will be crossing some dangerous ground.”

  We walk in silence for another while. My eyes are barely able to stay open, and I keep stumbling. A fog has enveloped us, and it’s making it harder to see around me. Killian and Samiel are a few paces in front of me, talking back and forth. Reaching out, I tap Killian on the shoulder. Turning, he smiles at me.

  “I’m tired. I can’t walk anymore.”

  I let my body slump onto his, and he laughs at me. Kissing my head, he scoops me into his arms and
continues to walk and talk. Wrapping my arms around his neck, I lay on his shoulder, finally getting some sleep. I can hear him talking as I drift off. His lips brush against my forehead every once in a while, and I know I made the right choice coming with him. How could I not have?

  Waking up, I find myself on a pile of straw; my arm itches like crazy from it. I don’t see Killian or Samiel around, so I creep to the wall. It’s dark enough in here, and it looks like a ruin of some old building. I really hate being left alone in a strange world. Making my way to the door, I chance a look outside. The sun is high and blinds me for an instant. Once my eyes adjust, I am mesmerized. The grass is so vibrant and green; the sky is a beautiful bluish-purple with beautiful white puffy clouds. I can smell the salt in the air, so I know there is some kind of sea or ocean nearby. Shielding my eyes with my hand, I step out further. All I see for miles is green—so much green.

  Bending over, I run my fingers through the calf length grass. It feels like velvet.

  “Amazing,” I whisper, twirling around with my arms outstretched and a huge smile on my face. Allowing the sun to warm me from the inside out, feeling altogether too hot, I pull off my shirt, leaving only my tank top and jeans.

  The wind blows gently, bringing a smile to my face again. I hear voices breaking through my thoughts, so I run back to the building but slip around the side instead of into it, where I am sure there is no escape.

  “If we travel on foot to Hope Tower, we can cross the unknown by boat to the Fire Island. We shall be able to fly from there.”

  I hear who I think is Samiel; the little shit can speak English. I wait for them to get closer just to make sure, but somehow I know it’s Killian. Like, I can feel him inside me, in the back of my mind.

  “You can’t hide from me, Reagan,” he says, his voice singing through my mind. Stepping out from behind the wall, I smile at him. Samiel walks into the building carrying some fish on his fingers, and I really want to be sick.