Married by Christmas

by Karen Kirst

  Her heart flailed at the sight of him. His black duster hugged his sturdy shoulders, the sides open to reveal a black vest, forest-green shirt underneath and black trousers encasing his long, muscular legs. A black-and-white handkerchief protected his neck from the cold.

  Her husband had become a forbidding stranger, and it hurt. Especially when she recalled the tender moments that had passed between them—the way he’d held her hands as they’d exchanged vows, comforted her after Wendell and Samantha’s visit, the expression on his face Christmas morning as he’d watched her open her gifts and the reverence with which he’d slid the gold band onto her finger.

  She missed his crooked smile. She missed the heat and admiration in his eyes right before he kissed her—

  “Are you busy?”

  “I, uh, not really. Do you need something?”

  “I need to go to the smithy.” He paused, uncertainty marking his features. “I thought I could drop you off at Clawson’s and afterward we could stop at Plum’s for dessert.”

  He was offering to spend time with her? Hope flared. Despite the many problems in their relationship, she’d begun to treasure the reemerging friendship between them. Things would never be easy, but surely they could achieve some level of contentment.

  When he’s around, I mean. Don’t forget he’s leaving the moment Samantha’s in custody. Don’t expect more than he’s willing to give.

  Recalling the night he’d told her he didn’t want her heart, that he didn’t care if she loved Adam forever, pain lodged in her chest.

  Caleb must’ve taken her hesitation for reluctance. “If you’d rather not go—”

  “No.” She quickly untied her apron strings. “I want to go. I’m just surprised by the invitation, that’s all.”

  Shifting his weight, his gaze landed on the floor. “Figured you needed a change of scenery as much as I do. There haven’t been any sightings of the gang in town since the last time. We should be safe.”

  Memories of that last trip to town and the resulting embrace slammed into her. She couldn’t resist a peek at his firm, perfectly shaped mouth. Caleb looked up and caught her staring. Longing darkened his eyes. His hands curled into fists, and he half turned away. “I’ll saddle up a horse for you. Unless you need the wagon?”

  They’d stocked up on flour and sugar and other dry goods last week—she’d given Nathan a list of items, which he’d gladly procured for them. Besides, riding close beside him on the narrow seat would only make her want things she shouldn’t. “No, thanks. I’d enjoy the ride.”

  Touching the brim of his hat, he closed the door without another word. Hurrying into the bedroom to change, she impulsively chose the dress from Nicole and her sisters.

  His stunned expression when she emerged onto the porch made up for his cool distance of the past weeks. His gaze did a slow inspection from the tips of her leather boots—snagging on the snug bodice and waistline—to the matching ribbons in her upswept hair.

  He came to assist her into the saddle. “New dress?”

  Her mouth went dry when he took hold of her hand. His heated skin seared hers. “It was a wedding present from your cousins.”

  “Nicole does good work. Suits you perfectly. In case I haven’t mentioned it, you’ve grown into a beautiful woman, Becca,” he said as he handed her up onto Cocoa’s back. “I’ll be the envy of every man in Gatlinburg.”

  Tightening her hands around the reins to keep from burying them in his hair, she stared deep into his eyes. “And I’ll be the envy of the women.”

  Shock parted his full lips. Then he surprised her by smiling. “They’ll certainly wonder what you see in me.”

  Pushing off, he went to mount the horse he’d borrowed from Josh. By his easy movements, she couldn’t tell he’d been injured at all. The tension had lifted, and the ride into town was pleasant. At Clawson’s, he waited until she had her horse hitched to the post.

  “I’ll join you here shortly.”

  She stepped onto the crowded boardwalk. With warmer temperatures and the sun shining in a clear blue sky, shoppers were out in droves. “I’ll wait for you.”

  Touching a finger to his hat’s brim, Caleb nudged his horse on down the street. Inside the mercantile, shoppers roamed the aisles and lined up to pay for their items. Rebecca spotted Nicole behind the counter helping customers and waved.

  “Hi, Rebecca.” Her eyes lit up when she noticed the dress. Pointing to a package she was wrapping, she shrugged and mouthed, Talk to you later.

  Rebecca smiled and strolled to the paper goods section in the middle aisle. She didn’t expect to see anything new—Emmett Moore stocked pretty much the same items from year to year. She wasn’t here to shop, really. Just being in the presence of other people buoyed her spirits. And there was the dessert at Plum’s to look forward to.

  “Excuse me.”

  Rebecca turned to see an unfamiliar young lady approaching. Petite and smartly dressed with blond ringlets peeking out of her bonnet, her eyes were kind and set in a pleasant face.

  “Good afternoon,” Rebecca offered politely, all the while racking her brain for a clue as to her identity. She didn’t resemble anyone of her acquaintance, but that didn’t mean she couldn’t be visiting family in the area.

  “I apologize for my rudeness, but I overheard the shop assistant speaking to you a moment ago. Is your name by chance Rebecca Thurston?” Curiosity sparkled in her pale blue eyes.

  “That’s me. Although it’s Rebecca O’Malley now.”

  The stranger’s resulting smile was blinding. “Oh, you’re married? How wonderful.”

  Thoroughly confused, Rebecca openly studied the girl. “Have we met before?”

  Clapping a hand over her mouth, she giggled nervously. “Forgive me, you must think I’m a complete ninny.” She thrust out her hand. “I’m Laura Tierney. You don’t know me, but I’ve heard a lot about you.”

  Tierney. Rebecca limply shook Laura’s hand, foreboding settling like cold mist in her bones.

  “Laura, sweetheart, I found the—” A voice she hadn’t heard in over a year drifted behind her, a voice that used to call her sweetheart. “Rebecca? Is that you?”

  Feeling as if she was in a dream, Rebecca slowly swiveled to gaze dazedly at the good-looking man in the wheelchair. “Adam.”

  Her former love looked very much the same save for a light beard. His wheat-colored hair was cut short as usual, and he was dressed simply, having never made much of a fuss over clothes, as long as they were clean. Right this moment, his eyes were colored with consternation and regret.

  “Rebecca, I had intended to pay you a visit.” His voice carried a note of strain. He cast a glance in Laura’s direction and grimaced. “I hadn’t envisioned us meeting up like this.”

  “You mean here in front of everyone?” Already the banker’s wife and another couple had abandoned their shopping to observe this most intriguing meeting between the jilted bride and her replacement. She should be used to this by now, what with Adam’s abandonment and her forced marriage to Caleb.

  “What’s a little more gossip?” she quipped, hysteria bubbling to the surface. Turning to address the blonde woman, she said with false brightness, “You must be Adam’s new wife. Welcome to our humble town. How long are you planning to visit?”

  Laura’s manner had turned uncertain. “I’m not sure. Adam indicated we may be here a week or two, at least. He hasn’t been home to see his family in quite some time.”

  “Rebecca.” Adam rolled the chair closer. “Can we go somewhere more private?”

  Around them, chatter had ceased, and it seemed to Rebecca that all eyes were on her and Laura. What does she give you that I couldn’t? she wanted to demand of Adam. Slightly nauseous, she clasped her hands tightly together and fought to appear calm.

  “Please excuse
me.”

  “Rebecca, wait—”

  Ignoring Adam’s quiet request, she plunged headlong down the aisle intent on escape.

  * * *

  The bell above the mercantile door dinged as Caleb entered. The unusual hush struck him first. Odd. Clawson’s was full of people conducting business. There should be conversation and the sounds of scoops and weights and paper rustling as Nicole and Emmett assisted customers. Instead, everyone stood frozen, fascinated by something in the middle of the store. Nicole’s mouth was pinched, violet eyes blazing with ill-humor. Something was wrong.

  Clipped footsteps registered to his left. The skin on the back of his neck prickling, he turned and observed Becca heading straight for him along this outer aisle. Skin as pale as moonlight, cheeks hollow, she appeared to have suffered a severe shock.

  She would’ve barreled right past him out the door if he hadn’t laid a hand on her arm. “Rebecca, what’s wrong?”

  Her jade eyes were empty, blank. It was as if she didn’t even recognize him. “I have to go.”

  “What’s happened?” he demanded in a low voice, aware that everyone’s attention had swiveled their way.

  “Caleb?”

  Becca went stiff. Caleb dropped his hand and, heartbeat thundering in his ears, searched out the owner of that voice. Couldn’t be, could it? But there sat his childhood friend. The man he’d condemned to a wheelchair. The man who’d abandoned Becca.

  Guilt and anger wrestled for victory, clouding his thinking to the extent he didn’t try and stop her from leaving the store. She was gone in an instant, hurrying to her horse.

  “What are you doing here, Adam?” The question came out more sharply than he’d intended, but all he could see was Becca’s face. She was hurting, and Adam was responsible.

  “My folks have been asking for us to visit for a while. I couldn’t put them off any longer.”

  “Us?” He belatedly noticed the small blonde standing slightly behind Adam’s wheelchair.

  His old friend’s smile spoke of true happiness. “This is my wife, Laura. Laura, meet Caleb O’Malley.”

  “Pleased to meet you,” she said, keen interest on her face. “You’re Rebecca’s husband?”

  Startled, his gaze swerved to Adam’s. But he remained unruffled. “That’s right.”

  Hands folded in his lap, Adam said simply, “My parents wrote me about your marriage.”

  The door opened behind Caleb as another customer entered. He edged sideways to give the man room to pass. Adam had a wife. No wonder Becca had run out of there as if her skirts were on fire. She still loves him, he thought, despair gripping him. His wife was in love with another man and there was nothing he could do about it.

  “You should go and talk to Becca,” Caleb said darkly, even as jealousy reared its ugly head. “She deserves an explanation, don’t you think?”

  He nodded in solemn agreement. “You’re right, and I will. But first I’d like to talk to you.”

  “Not here.”

  Adam agreed. Laura offered to stay behind and finish her shopping. When she bent to kiss her husband’s cheek, the affection she felt for him was plain as day. And while she seemed curious about Caleb, she gave him the impression that she fully trusted Adam and wasn’t bothered by his ex-fiancée’s earlier presence.

  On the boardwalk, Adam paused. “I’ll need help getting this contraption down the stairs,” he said with wry humor. “Care to help a friend out?”

  Caleb strove to hide his surprise. From his family’s reports after the accident, Adam hadn’t handled his paralysis well. Gritting his teeth, he grabbed the handles and maneuvered the wheels to the dirt street below. Talk about past mistakes slapping him in the face. How could Adam stand to look at him, let alone speak to him?

  “Where to now?” Caleb grunted, noticing the stares of passersby.

  “I seem to recall a spot behind the mercantile with a fine view of the river.”

  He tried not to jostle the man, but the dirt road wasn’t smooth and neither was the grassy expanse near the riverbank.

  As if sensing his thoughts, Adam said over his shoulder, “Don’t worry, I’m used to it.”

  When they’d reached the bench, Caleb dropped his hands to his sides. Moved around to face Adam.

  “There’s something I’ve needed to say to you since the night everything went wrong. I’m sorry. Sorry for daring you to break in. Sorry I couldn’t help you when that stack fell.” Confronted with the result of his reckless behavior, the remorse that had burdened him every day since weighed heavier than ever. He clenched his fists. “I know words won’t change facts, but that’s all I have to offer.”

  “My parents told me that you came to see me.” Adam’s gaze was steady, calm. Devoid of accusation. “They also told me how they turned you away. They feel bad about the way they acted, but haven’t known quite how to approach you.”

  “I—” He clamped his lips together. He’d been about to say he’d deserved their ill-treatment. Becca’s words from their conversation in the orchard slipped through his mind, something that had been happening with irritating frequency. He’d even opened his Bible searching for proof her words were true. And while he’d found quite a few verses to support her assertions, he’d had trouble applying the truth to his own situation.

  “I understand they were hurting,” he said at last.

  “I was angry for a long time,” Adam admitted. “At you. At God. Wasted a lot of time and energy on blaming my circumstances on everyone else but myself. Eventually I realized that I was responsible for my own choices. I went along with your plan because that’s what I always did. You were the leader, and mostly I followed you without question. Since then, I’ve learned to stand up for myself. Well—” he gave a halfhearted grin and spread his hands over his legs “—not exactly stand up. You get my meaning.”

  “How can you joke about it?” Caleb challenged.

  “It’s either laugh or wallow in self-pity,” he said, and shrugged. “I wallowed until I could hardly stand myself.”

  Kneading his tense neck muscles, Caleb gazed unseeing at the wide river below them. Adam had clearly learned to live with his disability. Had found peace and, from the looks of things, happiness.

  Adam spoke into the silence. “I know this is going to sound crazy, but I’m a happier man than I used to be. Do I wish I could do the things I used to? Sure. But if God hadn’t allowed it to happen, I would’ve married Rebecca and made us both miserable. I would’ve missed out on God’s calling for my life. Not only that, I wouldn’t have met Laura. She’s the love of my life.”

  Caleb stared hard at his friend. “Why would you say that? You and Rebecca were perfect together.” As difficult as that was to admit aloud, it was the truth. They’d been happy. Most of the time. But what couple didn’t have their issues?

  Sadness stamped his features. “We were far from perfect, Caleb. In fact, now that I’m able to look at things objectively, I’d venture to say the two of you are more suited than she and I ever were.”

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  Rebecca lingered in the O’Malley’s barn, the shadows and the horses’ nonjudgmental stares a balm to her ruffled spirits. The shock of seeing Adam had waned somewhat, allowing humiliation to pour in. What must Caleb think after she’d bolted like that?

  The sound of creaking metal behind her had her lifting the brush from Cocoa’s coat and twisting to see who had discovered her hiding place.

  Adam’s steady gaze searched her out in the semidarkness. Although bright outside, the interior of the lofty barn was dim, and she hadn’t bothered to light the lamps.

  With a sigh, she laid the brush on the stall’s edge and went out into the aisle. “Is Caleb with you?”

  “He said he’d wait in the cabin.”

  Rebecca was afraid to imagin
e what he must be experiencing right now.

  “And what about your wife? Where is she?”

  Hands folded in his lap, he was at ease in the chair. “At my parents’.”

  Her brows lifted. “She doesn’t have a problem with you visiting me?”

  “Laura understands we have unfinished business. I’ve kept nothing from her.”

  “I see.”

  “Rebecca—”

  She held up a hand. “All I want to know is why you didn’t answer my letters. If you’d simply written to me and told me you’d found someone else, I would’ve ceased writing. And that embarrassing scene in the mercantile would’ve been avoided.”

  His grave countenance reflected his inner struggle. “I regret that I didn’t have the courage to do what was right by you. At first it was just too painful. And then I met Laura, and I felt guilty. I left town an extremely bitter man, you know. I thought my life was ruined, that because of my disability I had nothing to offer. I never told you I felt God’s calling to preach.”

  Surprise rippled through her body. Adam? A preacher? He’d been set to take over his father’s farm. She’d thought he was content with that. Looking back, she realized they hadn’t spoken of truly serious issues. Their relationship had been quite shallow, come to think of it. She hadn’t shared her private thoughts with him. Nor he her.

  “I had no clue.”

  “That was part of our problem. We held pieces of ourselves back.”

  “You’re right. We did.” I don’t have the same problem with Caleb, though, do I? I say exactly what’s on my mind.

  “I couldn’t accept that I was meant to be a preacher, so I ignored what was in my heart. The accident stopped me from running.”

  “Are you saying you’re a preacher now?”

  “Not yet. I’m currently attending seminary. Laura and I are living with her aunt and uncle in Maryville.”

  She digested that information. “I lied,” she blurted. His brows shot up. “I do want to know something else. What convinced you to give her a chance when you couldn’t give me one?”