Mail Order Bride: JUMBO Mail Order Bride 20 Book Box Set
Page 42
Her agony seemed to go on for hours and when she fell silent, Charles took a peek, only to dart back under the table when he saw her twisting about on the mattress. He fell asleep and when he woke up, her cries now sounded weak and he was sure that his mother would die. Not that he knew much about dying.
His father had marched in then and whispered with the neighbor for a few minutes before she left. His mother seemed too quiet and then suddenly she let out a loud howl that drew Charles from his hiding place. He stood transfixed at the movement between her legs and to his horror, the head of a baby made its way out.
The rest of the baby slithered out, falling onto the mattress. The woman neighbor returned and rushed to his mother’s side. Charles went closer and watched as the three adults stared at the slimy baby without touching it. His own eyes looked at it carefully and saw what the adults had seen. The babies left leg was not formed, at the base where it began was a stump.
“Take it away from me!” a shrill cry reverberated throughout the room.
After that, his mother could not be consoled and Charles wished that his father and the neighbor woman would just take the slimy thing away so that his mother would stop screaming and crying. They did that, after conferring in whispers. The child and the neighbor woman disappeared into the night and that was the last that Charles ever heard of the matter again.
Still, a kind of sadness descended on the home and six months later, his mother took off from their home. She never returned. Charles knew that his mother’s disappearance and his father’s drunkenness had something to do with that night and that slimy child. His father had turned to the bottle and more often than not, Charles had to fend for himself, until he reached the age of twenty and decided to head for the new frontier and begin life afresh.
As the fever continued to lose its grip on him, Charles realized that as soon as he had laid eyes on Lilly at the station, the anger and blame he had locked somewhere as a child had reared its head and he had dumped all of that on Lilly. His heart swelled with compassion at the poor child, whose fate he would never know, and at Lilly who could have been that child had she not had more accepting parents.
One day he managed to open his eyes. The face he saw hovering over him was Lilly’s. Charles smiled weakly, happier than he could express to see her. His happiness was marred by the shame he felt. Her brown eyes looked dull with worry. Her round face and small pointed nose looked so pleasant to him; he could have stared at her all day. He tried to speak but nothing intelligible came out.
“Hush,” she soothed. “It’s still too soon. Don’t try to speak.”
Charles shook his head in frustration. He lifted his hand to touch her but it fell back down in midair. Just the mere act of moving his hand had depleted his energy and he realized just how sick he had been. Charles had so much to tell Lilly. He didn’t want to waste any more time. Those were his last thoughts before he fell asleep again.
***
Over the next few days, Lilly patiently fed Charles with broth and cleaned him up. Until he was strong enough to feed himself.
“Lilly,” Charles said, sitting up in the mattress.
She turned around and smiled so that her whole face lit up, and for a moment, Charles was transfixed by her beauty. Then he noticed something else. The little body she had seemed now like a bag of bones. What had happened to his Lilly?
“You haven’t been eating,” Charles said accusingly.
“I couldn’t bear to when you were so sick,” Lilly confessed in a hushed voice.
Charles was silent for some time to take in what she had said. He felt his body carried off in a wave of emotion. What kind of a woman was Lilly? After the terrible treatment he had meted out on her, she still found it in her heart to forgive him and nurse him back to health.
“I’ve been praying so hard and the Lord has answered my prayers,” she continued, her face infused with happiness.
Then a curtain seemed to close over her face and all joy left it to be replaced by a quiet sadness. Charles was at a loss. Had he said something to offend her? Before he could question her, she gathered the cutlery and walked back into the kitchen. Exhausted, he lay back on the mattress.
He woke up later to a deafening silence. It was completely dark and he knew that it was the middle of the night. He moved slightly and felt a warm body next to him. When his eyes adjusted to the darkness, he saw Lilly lying by his side, her body curved into a ball. He arranged himself behind her and wrapped his hand around her waist.
It felt so right holding her as though she belonged there, which she did, Charles reminded himself. Her body was warm and she smelt of soap and cleanliness. He sat in the darkness thinking how he would be able to make amends. They had so much work to do, Lilly and he. His illness had taught him that to love a woman out here meant that you had to teach her survival skills.
He shuddered to think of what would have happened to her if he had not made it. Then Charles remembered the light he had seen. He let out a soft whistle. He owed Lilly his life. It must have been she who had lit a fire.
Charles knew no woman who would have had the foresight to light a fire to guide him home. How had she dragged him into the house, she of a slight build and with a limp? How could he ever have thought her lesser than other women? Charles knew without a shred of doubt that the Lord had been at work and had given him a second chance. He held Lilly closer to him. He intended to seize this second chance.
He would treat his Lilly like a queen and erase all those bad memories of the beginning of their marriage. He would also show the Lord that he had not made a mistake in offering him another chance to make wrongs right. Charles fought sleep, enjoying the feeling of been close to Lilly. He wanted to do more than hold her—he wanted to kiss her and show her with deed how much he loved her.
TEN
5 days later
Lilly had bid her time, waiting patiently until Charles regained his strength. He had changed so much that she had trouble believing that he was the same man. That made her decision even harder to follow through, but she knew that she had to. She had left a home where she was loved and cared for. She saw no rational reason to continue living with a man who referred to her as a ‘cripple’ and wanted her out of his life.
She had seen the puzzled look in his eyes when his friendly overtures had been met with silence. What did he expect? He didn’t want her, so what was the pretense for?
“We need to speak Lilly,” Charles said to her as she performed her last duties as his wife.
Her case was packed and ready, and she was preparing their breakfast. She nodded, unsurprised by his solemn tone. He was ready to tell her that he wanted her to return to Pennsylvania. He was in luck, her things were ready and she would not make a fuss.
To make it easier for him, Lilly opened the table drawer and silently handed him the letter. As though it were a normal morning, she poured out tea for both of them and placed a chunk of fresh bread next to Charles.
“Oh no!” he exclaimed. “Lilly, this was a mistake,” he said, his voice laced with remorse.
Her lower lip trembled as she bit on it to halt the rapid movement.
“You called me a cripple,” Lilly voiced sobbing.
Hot tears stung her face and she felt as though she would drown in the humiliation.
He threw his hands in the air.
“Please give me a chance to explain. I don’t deserve your ear but for the grace of God, kindly hear me out,” Charles pleaded.
Lilly nodded. It wasn’t much to ask and maybe they could part on good terms. She listened and found herself enthralled by the story of his younger brother and how the birth had broken their family apart. Her heart went out to the young Charles who had understood none of it and for the mother who was unable to love her own child.
She thought of her own parents who had never once treated her with disdain because of her shorter leg. If anything, her mother had insisted that she was just as good if not better than other young gi
rls. Lilly had believed her mother, until she read the letter. She had realized that while her own family loved and accepted her, it was not necessarily so with the rest of the world.
Charles was now explaining how his whole person had recoiled when he saw Lilly. How that long buried pain had come to the surface and he had shut himself off from the possibility of loving Lilly.
“You’re the most beautiful woman I know and I am blessed to have you. I will spend the rest of my life showing you just how beautiful and wonderful you are,” Charles said with feeling.
“I was going to leave today,” Lilly confessed.
“I know my dear, I saw your case. It broke my heart, knowing how close I came to losing you. Will you ever forgive me?”
Lilly reached out and touched his still-too-thin cheeks and patted him. She loved Charles, had loved him from the moment she had set her eyes on him.
“I already did. The Lord has walked with me throughout and I hold no bitterness towards you, my husband.”
She saw the effect her words had on him. He smiled at her tenderly and reached out to clasp her hands.
“Will you come with me?” Charles said. “I want to show you something.”
Still holding her hands, he walked towards the bedroom and only stopped at the door to his bedroom.
“I’d like to invite you to share our bedroom from today henceforth.”
Lilly giggled a little from nervousness and the formal tone that Charles put on. Her throat felt constricted and she could not speak. Instead she nodded, deciding to trust Charles. He led her into the room and shut the door. Lilly knew that her fear showed in her face, but she could not hide it. This was happening too soon, her mind screamed out.
She closed her eyes, and let herself be led towards the bed. Charles slowly undressed her, taking his time removing every garment.
“Open your eyes my love,” he pleaded, but she kept them tightly shut.
She felt the last of her garments slip out and her heart stopped beating. Finally, drawn by curiosity, she opened her eyes. Charles lay on the side of the bed looking at her body tenderly. He bent low and planted kisses on the length of her short leg. She searched his face for signs of disgust and saw none.
“You are truly beautiful and I love you with all my being.”
An hour later
So this is what it meant to be a married woman. Charles had touched her in secret places she had never imagined letting anyone access. Lilly blushed at the very thought of future conjugal visits. She had let herself be carried off into a place that she could not describe afterwards.
She laughed softly at the realization that she was in bed in the middle of the morning, something that she had never done all her life. She couldn’t have been more content with the outcome of her journey West. She was now truly Mrs. Jones.
As she lay down to cuddle in Charles’ warm embrace, she had faith that the Almighty would ensure that their union was fruitful: after all, it was He who had set her on this odyssey of faith.
The End
11. The Saloon Owner and The Novice Nun - Mary Margaret
TABLE OF CONTENTS
ONE
TWO
THREE
FOUR
FIVE
SIX
SEVEN
EIGHT
NINE
TEN
ELEVEN
TWELVE
ONE
“There hath no temptation taken you but such as is common to man: but Godis faithful, who will not suffer you to be tempted above that ye are able; but will with the temptation also make a way to escape, that ye may be able to bear it.”
1 Corinthians 10:13
Dominican Sisters
New York
Mary Margaret Lay, novice nun at the Convent of the Dominican Sisters, was in turmoil. The anguish she had been feeling over the decision about taking her final vows, was tearing her apart.
It would soon be the end of her novitiate and she would be asked to undertake the preparation for Temporary Profession. The last step prior to the commitment of Perpetual Profession, which was a lifelong commitment to the Lord and the Dominican way of life.
Becoming a bride of Christ was an honor beyond measure, but it was also primarily a call from God. A call she had tried to answer. A call that she had believed until recently, with ironclad certainty, was for her.
However, lately she had found herself too often longing for what most women took for granted—a husband and a home of her own. But how could she bear to leave? The sisters and novices were her family, her entire world. Her devotion to the Father, the Son and the Holy Ghost, was sacred, how could she be considering replacing that blessed relationship with that of Adam and Eve?
She was tormented with the thought that these feelings were whispers from demons sent by the devil to tempt her away from the path. As she worked in the small public healing area of the convent, the need for a decision was not far from her mind.
Suddenly she felt the soft touch of tiny fingers. As she looked down, her gaze fell on a little girl, with big brown eyes and curly hair framing the face of an angel.
“Sister,” the little girl whispered, looking at her with a solemn expression.
“I am not a sister yet, my child. You may call me Miss Mary Margaret,” Mary Margaret replied with a smile.
“Miss Mary Margaret, why are you so sad?”
May Margaret looked at the child stunned, “What makes you think I am sad?”
“You don’t smile. Are you angry with Jesus?”
“No, my child never. The son of God is the very embodiment of love. I could never be angry at him.”
“Then why do you look so sad?” the child asked curiously. In the face of her innocence, Mary Margaret felt compelled to tell the truth.
“Sometimes I wish I had a little girl like you.”
Her declaration made the child smile.
“Like me?” the little girl queried shyly.
“Yes, just like you,” Mary Margaret responded, smiling.
“Then why don’t you?” The question was asked with all the innocence that can only be seen in children. “Does Jesus not want you to have a little girl?”
Mary Margaret found herself unable to answer. Someone called a name, the child turned around and squealing with joy ran towards her parents. As Mary Margaret watched the family’s reunion, it felt like the Holy Ghost was speaking to her. It was so clear. The love of a mother, a father, a child, was also a way of worshiping the Almighty.
She could no longer deny the truth; her heart ached for a family of her own. She could not take her vows.
In a dazed, she got up and walked aimlessly out into the city. The convent was located at the edge of the city, giving it a country air; yet a twenty-minute walk led to New York City. Mary Margaret had never quite adapted to the city. The poverty and the crowds horrified her, sometimes her heart would beat wildly and she ran out of breath in panic, thinking that she was lost.
Now she kept to the outskirts, refusing to be swallowed by the confusion of carts, people on foot and animals on the streets. Her worn shoe sank into something soft. The smell of cow droppings wafted to her nose, but she did not pinch it as most people would. It was a reminder of a happier life, growing up on a small farm.
Her parents were simple people, living life on their small farm together with their four children. Mary Margaret was the eldest of her siblings and the hope of the family. Her mother had dreams of her children leaving a mark in the world, beginning with Mary Margaret. Her father on the other hand was a farmer, content to feed his three cows and till the small piece of land that he owned.
Mary Margaret wanted the same for herself. A husband and a house full of children. The realization of how profoundly this decision would change her life, brought her down to her knees.
Dear Lord, please, if this is my path, show me how to walk it, because I have never been far from your embrace. Where will I find a God-fearing man, who will want to start
a family and glorify your name?
“Why are you crying?” a strange female voice queried, startling Mary Margaret out of her reverie. Surprised she touched her cheek, her fingers came back wet. She hadn’t even noticed the tears that had been rolling down her cheeks.
The young woman who had approached her looked curiously worried. “Have those evil nuns been mean to you?”
Mary Margaret was confused by the sudden interrogation.
“What evil nuns?”
“The ones who made you cry,” her new companion insisted.
“Nuns aren’t evil. Why would you think such a thing?” Mary Margaret asked even more confused.
“Bad experience,” her companion answered before sitting down next to her. Instead of being offended at her familiarity, Mary Margaret felt like she was speaking to an old friend.
“What’s your name?”
“Ada Devine, and yours?”
“Mary Margaret Lay.”
“Well Mary Margaret, there must be a reason you are out here, far from your convent, crying in the middle of the street,” Ada replied.
“If you must know, I have decided to leave my convent,” she answered honestly.
“Why am I not surprised? It’s like I suspected, those evil women have been beating you,” Ada exclaimed.
“I already told you, my sisters are not evil. They are wonderful godly women. I would appreciate if you stop calling them names,” Mary Margaret replied in a no-nonsense tone.
“I am sorry. I did not mean to offend you,” Ada said as she scooted closer to her on the bench.
“You must have had a very bad experience indeed.”
“You could say that,” Ada muttered. “So why are you crying?” she continued.