Beats of the Heart

by B. Rose, Charli

  I sighed in relief. “Good. I hope you negotiate yourself a pay raise after each gig.”

  “Don’t worry about me. I’m doing fine. My apartment is rent controlled. My blog is making me money through advertisers. Things are good,” she assured me.

  “I’m so proud of you for chasing after your dreams.” I ran my fingers along her jaw.

  “I’m so proud of us for not losing us during the chase,” she whispered. It had been a fear of hers before we ever even took a chance on our love.

  Me too. During the band’s rise to success we’d encountered many musicians who’d sacrificed love for music. I personally couldn’t fathom it. There’d be no music without Izzy. Thankfully the rest of the band fully understood my commitment to her even if the label didn’t seem to.

  “Yo, D. I almost forgot, Lila said she needed to meet with you later before the show,” Joe called over his shoulder as he drove the busy streets.

  “Did she say what for? We’ve already met all our obligations for this week.”

  “She didn’t say. But she seemed to be in a pissy mood.” He quirked a brow at me in the rearview mirror.

  “What else is new?” I grumbled. The label insisted that Lila handle all of the band’s PR work. She was good at her job, but she and I didn’t see eye to eye when it came to Izzy or my private life. I was counting the days until I could say goodbye to her interference. Our contract couldn’t end soon enough.

  “Maybe she wants to talk about the band’s sighting in the Red-Light District,” Izzy offered.

  “Nah. Believe it or not, that was good publicity for the band. They were seen out in a rocker appropriate location, and they didn’t get out of hand. It was a win for the group. Not something for her to be pissy over.”

  “Maybe she’s not upset.” Izzy shrugged and started paying attention to the sights out the windows. Her eyes were bright with wonder, taking in the cacophony of colors lining the canal. “Is that the flower market?”

  “Yep. Surprise.” She’d always loved flowers, so I couldn’t let her come here without the opportunity to capture the beauty of the floating flower market.

  A squeal slipped past her lips as she bounced in her seat. My heart soared with her joy. I lived to put a smile on my girl’s face. “Waffles first, though,” I cautioned.

  Her lower lip jutted out in that way I loved. Leaning toward her, I nibbled her delicate pout until she moaned and granted me admittance. I took everything she offered and gave everything I had.

  “Coast is clear, guys,” Joe announced as he parked.

  “Come on. With the show being tonight, fans will be more vigilant about looking for any of us.”

  * * *

  After eating our fill of heart-shaped waffles, we walked through aisle after aisle of colorful blooms. Izzy snapped pictures at every turn. Every now and then she stopped and sketched things that caught her eye. Watching her turn life into art was inspiring.

  People began to glance our way. Conversations were whispered behind cupped hands. A crowd began to grow slowly. They kept their distance, but they were definitely trailing us.

  “Time to go.” Joe stepped close to us and started herding us to the exit. Clicks and flashes went off behind us. I tucked Izzy’s head into my chest and pulled her close as we hurried in the direction of the car.

  Once we were safely hidden away from the growing crowd, Joe asked, “Do you want me to drop Izzy back at the hotel, then take you to the venue so you can meet with Lila before the show?”

  “No. I’d just as soon she come with us,” I answered, then turned to Izzy. “Unless you need to change or have to go back to the room for something.”

  “Nope. I’ll come get the lay of the land, so I’ll be ready to shoot the concert.” She snuggled into the cavern under my chin.

  “Perfect.” I sighed in contentment.

  In no time, Joe was parking by the back entrance of the venue. I set Izzy up in my dressing room, then went in search of Lila. It didn’t take long to find her. She rounded the corner as I headed toward the green room. The look on her face was not one of happiness. I stopped in front of her and internally braced myself for whatever she was about to go on a tirade about.

  “Nice of you to make time to meet with me. I didn’t know if you planned to blow off all your responsibilities or not,” she remarked snidely. Gripping the fabric on my bicep, she tugged me in the direction of the green room. I snatched my arm away, causing her hand to fall. I didn’t need to be led like a petulant child off to time out.

  Once we were safely shut inside the green room, I threw myself on the couch, figuring I may as well be comfortable while she ranted about whatever had crawled up her butt. “I’m not sure what’s going on. But I know I haven’t missed any scheduled appearances or interviews. Remember, I had you schedule everything for before Izzy was to arrive, so I’d be free to spend time with her.” Lila’s attitude had been getting more and more out of hand.

  “Yes, you have gone to all the things on the official schedule. But you failed to go out with the guys last night, which was a perfect opportunity for the band to gain some more publicity. Instead the guys got noticed, and it’s especially noticeable that you are absent. That’s a problem.” She sat next to me.

  “Why is that a problem?” My patience was wearing incredibly thin.

  “Because what good reason would the front man of a rock band have for skipping out on a night in the Red-Light District with his bandmates?” The look on her face said how dumb can you be.

  “You know that isn’t my scene. Hasn’t been for a long time. Neither are the clubs or parties. I tolerate them when I have to. But no way in hell was I going to paint the town in Amsterdam, stirring up false rumors that would only serve to hurt Izzy.” I thought my reasoning was pretty sound, and as a woman, Lila should’ve understood.

  “If your girlfriend can’t handle the heat of the gossip rags, then perhaps she isn’t cut out for a relationship with someone in the spotlight.” Her mouth turned down in a frown.

  ♪ “Fallen” by Bret Michaels

  I ground my teeth. “Izzy is fully aware of the garbage that those tabloids print. And she’s certainly capable of ignoring the lies. But I’m not going to provide fuel to a fire that might burn the person I love. It isn’t in any of my contracts that I have to be seen out partying and raising hell.”

  “Fine,” she huffed and scooted closer to me. “The label execs aren’t happy about the lack of sensational news about you recently, but I’ll try to smooth them over. But that brings me to our next issue. Have you seen the latest news about you?”

  “No.” I shrugged, ready to be done with this conversation so I could get ready for the concert. “You know I don’t read articles about me or the band. All that matters to me is the music. I could care less what the latest rumors are about us. They’re all stupid anyway—Jett and Brooks are long lost brothers, Maddox is really an alien, Wilder is in love with an alien. Where do they get this crap anyway?”

  She didn’t even crack a smile at the hilarious headlines I’d just made up. “Well, you’d better start caring. Someone printed photos of you and Izzy strolling hand in hand the other day. Random hookups don’t hold hands,” she spat.

  “We were walking down the street, hand in hand as you say. And newsflash, she is my girlfriend, not a random hookup. Holding hands is kind of part of it.”

  She sighed. “A new photo showed up just a little bit ago. The two of you cuddled close.”

  “Show me the damn photos that have you so bent out of shape.” I rolled my eyes as I waited for her to bring up the images on her phone.

  She held out her phone to show me. The first article’s headline read: LO front man walks the streets of Amsterdam with… girlfriend? The photo beneath it was taken at an angle. It showed my profile, but because Izzy was looking up at me, all that could be seen of her was her colorful hair. Our fingers were laced together, and a laugh was on my lips. The photo said more about me than about her. Th
e joy on my face was undeniable.

  Lila swiped the screen, bringing up the new article. That headline read: Rocker, Dawson Anderson cozies up with same girl twice? The accompanying photo showed me with my arm around Izzy and hers around me. Again, only her hair was visible. But her hair was unique. There was no mistaking that the girl in the photos was the same just wearing different clothes.

  “You’ve never been photographed with the same girl twice. It’s noticeable. And not in a good way,” Lila’s voice was carefully controlled.

  “I’ve posed for thousands of photos over the years. You make sure the tabloids never show me with the same girl twice when you plant stories for them to print. That’s on you. I’m not going to apologize for having a life beyond the band.” I was getting so tired of all the crap that went along with being famous. Wasn’t I allowed to have a relationship? Something that mattered to me?

  “Dawson, we’ve talked about this. You know the label execs agree with me. You officially being in a relationship is bad for the band. Seventy-five percent of the band’s album sales are to single girls who all want to dream they have a shot with you. You have to appear single and available. If that’s going to be a problem, then maybe the label shouldn’t employ Isabelle anymore.” Her voice was oddly quiet considering she’d just threatened Izzy’s upcoming freelance job.

  I drew in a deep breath, then expelled it through my gritted teeth. “Let me make one thing perfectly clear, if Izzy goes, I go. I’ll buy out the rest of my contract. Whatever I have to do. The band has been considering its options when our contract is up anyway. Izzy and I have been in a serious relationship for three years now. Not once have we ever been photographed inappropriately. This is the first time anyone has even managed to capture an image of us. And you can’t even see her face. They don’t know who she is. You’re making a big deal out of nothing.” My fists clenched, and inside I seethed at her nerve.

  “It’s my job to decide what is a big deal. Not yours. And a decline in ticket sales is a big deal. Ticket sales dropped on those shows a year ago after it was speculated you were in a relationship. It took me working my magic to negate the effects of those articles. Face it, your bread and butter is horny women who like to think they have a chance of getting in your pants after a show. Best thing you can do is own it for as long as you can. If Izzy really loves you, she’ll understand that this is just part of the job. And if she doesn’t understand, it’s better for you to find out now.” There was a hard glint in her eyes.

  “Whatever, Lila. We’ll be more discreet. We don’t have many more outings planned for her trip anyway. We’ll be staying in.” I got to my feet, trying to send the message that I was done with this conversation.

  “And remember, if anyone should approach you or Izzy and asks about a relationship, neither of you are to confirm anything,” she warned. “Dawson, you know I have your best interests at heart.” She laid her hand on my chest and blinked innocently at me.

  “Fine. Now are we done?” I clipped my words.

  “For now.”

  I turned my back and started to leave.

  “Dawson,” she called from behind me. When I didn’t turn around, she continued to speak anyway, “Once Izzy goes back stateside, you should probably make an effort to regain some of your carefree, party attitude from a few years ago. Your contract is up for renegotiation for the upcoming album. You don’t want to give the execs a reason to drop your bonuses. Play the manwhore role for a bit. Being photographed with a new groupie on your arm every day will keep the girls coming in more ways than one. And it will make the powers that be happy.”

  I didn’t humor her with anything else. Turning the knob, I purposefully strode into the hallway and went in search of the best anecdote for my boiling blood.

  * * *

  Hours later, I was still pissed when I left the stage and saw Lila standing next to Izzy. Losing myself in Izzy and then in the music on stage only tamped the rage. Roaring like a freight train, it barreled into my gut. It was time to start counting down the days ‘til the end of our contract. Five hundred and forty-four days. But who was counting? Besides, we were their cash cow at the moment, so they really didn’t want to piss us off. I needed to give the guys a heads up that I mentioned leaving the label to Lila. They should know I spilled the beans. It wasn’t my place to hint at our plans yet.

  Forcing a smile to my lips, I greeted Izzy. Something was wrong. I could read her like piece of music. Her eyes didn’t sparkle with their usual joy when we entered each other’s orbits. Her shoulders were curved in on themselves, shielding her. With calloused fingers, I cupped her cheek and tilted her face up to mine.

  “Hey, beautiful. Did you enjoy the show?” My eyes traced every nuance of her face—the worry lines around her eyes, the paleness of her skin, the down tic of the corner of her mouth.

  “Mmhmm. I’ll never tire of watching you own the stage.”

  Lila hadn’t budged from her spot of wall near Izzy. But I couldn’t find a damn to give. So, I did what I wanted, I let my mouth find its home on Izzy’s. With a groan of surrender, her lips parted letting me in. It didn’t matter that my clothes were sticking to me. Or that I smelled like sweat. Or that people were milling all around us, probably members of the media too. Or that Lila was huffing in anger next to us. Or that my cock was growing painfully hard as it pressed against the cove of her thighs. None of it penetrated our bubble.

  A body brushed against my back, jostling us. But it didn’t dislodge our lips. If anything, we became more determined in our kiss. In communicating everything we meant to each other. If only I had that black velvet box in my pocket, I’d drop down to one knee and beg for forever. When sparks of light began to flicker behind my eyelids, I knew I had to come up for a real breath of air. Reluctantly, I pulled back and rested my forehead on hers. The sparkle was starting to twinkle in her eyes again. Relief filled me. I’d restore her happiness by the time the night was over.

  ♪“You’re All I Need” by White Lion

  “Yo, dude. You two going to come hang out with us for at least a little while at the club?” Brooks asked, completely oblivious to the moment he was intruding upon.

  A quick look around revealed that Lila was still within earshot. “I’m not so sure that’s a good idea,” I murmured.

  Izzy squeezed my hand. Her touch communicated understanding and acceptance.

  “Why not?” Brooks’s lips turned down in a frown.

  “Because Dawson and I aren’t supposed to be photographed together. We’re supposed to be discreet for the sake of the band,” Izzy parroted words that no doubt had been said to her at some point during our show.

  “Fuc… I mean screw that,” Brooks thundered. “The place we’re going is upscale. All celebrities and wannabes. There won’t be any cameras there. They don’t even let you bring your phones inside.”

  Leaning back slightly, but still keeping my hands on her hips, I said, “What do you say, flutterby? Want to go dancing with me?”

  “I’d love to.” My girl loved to dance. And dancing with her was a delicious form of foreplay.

  * * *

  Joe parked in a darkened alleyway. As soon as the car doors opened, the air reverberated with a heavy thump. The bass was so loud, it was impossible to discern any hint of the melody.

  Ty and Blake led the way to a hidden door and knocked. When it opened a crack, a quick conversation was had before the door was thrown open and we were allowed inside. Joe hovered behind me and Izzy, making sure we were safe in the middle of our pack.

  Next to me, Izzy's body started swaying to the rhythm lacing the air. She’d never been able to resist an addictive beat. I paused a few seconds, letting her get a couple of steps ahead of me so I could appreciate the view. The swing of her hips was hypnotic. My fingers twitched, itching to grip her body and move in time with it. She threw a smirk over her shoulder, knowing exactly why I'd slowed down. She tugged my hand forcing me to fall in step with her.

  Whe
n the front of our group emerged from the long hallway into the large open room, a hostess greeted us. It was impossible to hear the words coming from her mouth, but the accompanying hand gestures let us know space had been reserved for us in a corner of the upper level.

  The pulsing crowd parted as we moved toward the staircase in the center of the club. A bar ran along the wall behind us while private booths lined the far wall. To the left was a DJ booth suspended above the masses. Tables were scattered to the right. Most of the available floor space was being utilized for dancing.

  There were so many famous faces in the crowd that no one seemed to pay attention to a few more adding to the mix. Some of the tension in my shoulders relaxed with the knowledge that we could just have fun without being "on" for once. We had dressed to blend in, just in case. Plain t-shirts, jeans, ball caps. Izzy had even twisted her hair up into a bun that only allowed the pink to be seen, all the other beautiful hues were hidden within. Lila seemed mollified by it.

  When we reached our designated area, a waitress in a skimpy outfit introduced herself to us. Apparently, she would be tending bar in our little corner of the club. I ordered a mint tea and a water. There was no way in hell I planned to let my senses be dulled by anything. Izzy and I were fighting against a ticking clock and every moment was to be savored. Plus, I wanted to make sure I was fully capable of taking care of her while we were out. After the bartender talked up her specialty drink, a Porn Star Martini, Izzy decided to try it.

  The young girl quickly got everyone in the group’s drink orders and then took her place behind the bar. Efficiently, she began mixing and pouring. We all watched in amazement as she twirled and flipped bottles, creating concoctions like Tom Cruise in Cocktails.

  Izzy moaned when she took the first sip of her drink, a combination of passionfruit juice and champagne. “The drink’s living up to its name already. You’re moaning like a porn star after one sip,” I teased.