I Am Not A Gangster

by Bobby Cummines

  I don’t want your big fancy cars

  Or your modern washing machines

  When the flowing rivers are just as good

  And keep my clothes twice as clean

  I don’t want a bank account

  To hide away my loot

  All the money I really need

  I can hide in my boot

  I don’t want to move mountains

  Jut to gain a slap on the back

  Along with all the worry it brings

  That causes a heart attack

  I don’t want status symbols

  Or a badge of authority

  As long as I know I’m an honest man

  That’s all that matters to me

  What I would like is to be a free man

  To go just where I please

  And hear the songs of the birds

  The whisper of the breeze

  HYPOCRISY

  People saying words they don’t mean

  Expressing emotions they don’t feel

  They’re singing songs of brotherly love

  But wishing they could kill

  What a crazy world we live in

  This whole world’s gone insane

  War is no justification

  Politicians won’t take the blame

  The children we watch burning

  They’re using napalm bombs

  On Sundays they’re in churches

  Singing gospel songs

  All dressed in garbs of finest silk

  Jewels set in purest gold

  A hungry child stretches out its hand

  To a heart it knows is cold.

  JUDAS

  When I was free and victorious

  You loved and praised my name

  But you were nowhere to be found

  When the roar of the battle came

  You watched me battle on alone

  Without a shield or sword

  You saw them whip and crucify me

  And never said a word

  Though guards and chains restrained me

  I fought every inch of the way

  You saw the sentence they gave me

  Not a comforting word did you say

  These arms that once held you

  The warmth of loving and giving

  You watched as they placed me in this tomb

  Buried whilst still living

  SHORT-TERM PRISONER

  I watch you walk this cell block

  And, young man, I feel your pain

  I relate to you so easily

  Because I once felt the same

  But I hope you never see the real horrors

  That I have seen in this cage

  The total lack of humanity

  That brutalise and outrage

  You think you have a problem

  But, my friend, ours are so small

  Compared to those serving life

  Never to see beyond the wall

  So don’t let your pain cripple you

  Open up your eyes and see

  That you have no real problem

  Because, one day at least, you’ll be free

  THE BATTLE WITHIN MYSELF

  I have fought many a strange battle

  On many a foreign shore

  Followed many strange philosophies

  Entered many a strange door

  Seen the faces of life’s monsters

  The faces of lust and greed

  Have seen the fantasies within this dream

  That cater for most men’s needs

  Yet still searching for the truth

  The truth that might be a lie

  Looking at the essence of life

  And slowly seeing it die

  Accumulating great pleasures

  Trying to assess true wealth

  Fighting the hardest battle of my life

  The battle within myself

  A WARRIOR KNOWS ALL THESE THINGS

  No place to rest this weary soul

  No soft warm feathered bed

  No emotions to show in this cold war

  Just battles that waited ahead

  There are many ways to kill a man

  A Judas kiss or a cold steel blade

  A warrior knows all these things

  But battles on, unafraid

  The sword of love is the most ruthless tool

  That mankind has ever used

  For when that sword has been drawn

  Then love itself is abused

  And when the war has come to an end

  We each tally up the score

  And bind our wounds and walk away

  Because love exists no more

  BOARD OF VISITORS

  They say they’re there to protect prisoners

  Follow up prisoners’ complaints

  As they take away your remission

  This board of unholy Saints

  They smile and listen to your plight

  But to them you’re just lowlife

  They couldn’t give a damn for your children

  Even less for your struggling wife

  They are an android type of people

  Born of a brutal machine

  They don’t care about abused prisoners

  As long as the paperwork’s clean

  They sit in judgement on kangaroo courts

  They crucify everyone

  Yet they tell you they protect our rights

  But how can they – when we have none?

  MY MOTHER

  She’s always there when she’s needed

  And that’s always been the case

  She’s always a source of comfort

  A warm and gentle face

  She’s always understanding

  Stands by me through thick and thin

  She can never see the wrong in me

  I am always free from sin

  She has a heart of pure gold

  She would give you her last shilling

  If ever anybody needed help

  She would be there, ever willing

  She never makes a lot of fuss

  She believes we should help one another

  And I’m so proud to be able to say

  This beautiful soul is my mother

  CONTRARY TO APPEARANCE

  You think of me as a chained man

  Restrained by locks and bars

  A man denied all privileges

  Such as gazing at the stars

  You think of me as a broken man

  Locked securely in a cell

  Being tormented by life’s demons

  That dwell in this living hell

  But never judge a book by its cover

  Gaze deeply into my eyes

  For they are the mirrors of my soul

  And by them you will realise

  That all of us are prisoners

  You as well as me

  And freedom is a state of mind

  And it is I who am truly free

  TIME

  Time for loving

  Time for tears

  Weeks turn to months

  Months turn to years

  Time for reflections

  Time to forget

  The happiness and laughter

  The sadness and regret

  That youthful beauty

  Now withered with age

  Wrinkles of time

  We count with rage

  Time is a thief

  A destroyer of the dream

  As it ticks off the days

  That is life’s theme

  HE PEDDLES DREAMS

  He peddles dreams

  He peddles hope

  He deals in substances

  Labelled dope

  He deals in illusions

  Is the father of lies

  He will take your money

  Ignore your cries

  He talks of philosophies

  He thinks he’s hip

  He sings of no possessions

  Whils
t pocketing the blue chip

  He will sell to the wealthy

  He will sell to the bum

  He will peddle to children

  He really is scum

  MY TRUTH IS MY POETRY

  An armour of golden sunlight

  To cover my naked skin

  The power not created by men of war

  But by the love I feel within

  My legions are those visionary men

  Who speak through the poem’s verse

  Men who need no shield or sword

  When their truth inflicts wounds far worse

  For the poem is the voice of God

  Spoken through the soul

  And through the words of such poetry

  He shows the picture as a whole

  My kingdom is my vision

  My jewels, flowers of the Earth

  My truth is in my poetry

  That truth gave my poetry birth

  APPENDIX III

  A MESSAGE FROM THE OPEN UNIVERSITY

  Bobby’s story is the epitome of all we hope for with every one of the offenders we work with. We are particularly proud of the fact that many students continue their studies when they have served their term and are released into the community. Our work with the Prisoners’ Education Trust, which provides learning opportunities for offenders and awards grants to prisoners to fund distance learning modules, demonstrates the impact that access to educational opportunities can have.

  Of the prisoners who are awarded grants, only around one quarter go on to re-offend, compared to an average re-offending rate of around 65 per cent for all prisoners. Considering the personal challenges facing these prisoners upon their release, this is a compelling and outstanding achievement.

  Now we have about 1,700 students on more than 200 courses across all of the university’s faculties in approximately 150 prisons (covering all security categories) in the UK and Ireland.

  During this entire forty-year history, the university has constantly refined and redeveloped the delivery of its Offender Learning Programme to meet the unique challenges and constraints posed by working with offenders in prison and secure units and ensure that our offering to them remains high quality, consistent, safe and accessible.

  And not only does the university’s work in prisons demonstrate our commitment to widening participation wherever and however we can, but, led by our Centre for Inclusion and Collaborative Partnerships, it also enables us to trial and innovate new methods of face-to-face support and virtual delivery that might potentially help a much wider pool of disadvantaged students. Nationally, we have an average of more than 600 offender learners each year undertaking an access module, and during any one presentation the Centre might have students in around 80 prisons. We aim to overcome the negative reinforcements of an offender’s surroundings to help make them aware of the possibility of a very different future, as we work with them to provide the means that could make this a reality.

  I myself recently had the opportunity to attend a degree ceremony in a prison. As many people will know, an Open University degree ceremony is always an inspiring occasion, but this one was particularly moving. The pride in the room was even more palpable than usual – from his family, his friends and the prison staff present, including the governor – at the efforts of this man to put his previous life behind him and complete what is an enormous achievement in any circumstances.

  Lucian J. Hudson, Director of Communications, 2014

  ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

  Charlie Richardson; Fred Dinenage; Kate Beal; Ronnie Richardson; The Open University; Mr Justice Keith; Mike Turner QC; Dexter Dias QC; Juliet Lyon; Colin Cook; Garden Court Chambers; Lord Ramsbotham; Judge John Samuels QC; the patrons of Unlock; Mark Leech; Dr Deborah Cheney; Nick Clegg MP; Edward Garnier MP; Joe, Sharon and Charlotte Baden; David and Ju Smith; Bilal Dunn; Trevor, Anita and William Cox; Queenie, Niki, Laurence Reddy and family; Paul and Carolyn Ferris; Paul Donnelly; Craig Knight; Barry Epstein; Tony Dunn; Chris Lloyd; Professor Shadd Maruna; Mark Oaten; Tony Bull; Andy; Micky and Jack Capper; Lloyd, Chantel, Elka, Yusal, Yukari, Mika and Ma and all those who worked with me on that long road to the OBE.

  And special thanks to David Meikle whose flair and enthusiasm helped to tell the story of my life.

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