“I just can’t do this …” he said in a quiet whisper, his words slurred and almost incoherent.
“Aw babe …” Jordan said, hugging him close.
Before she knew it, they were kissing and she was comforting him the best way she knew how, with her body. Afterwards, BJ passed out, and Jordan lay in the semi-darkness of the room thinking about all the different ways she wanted to kill Allexxiss Ramsey.
The next day, BJ seemed to be in somewhat better spirits. Neither he nor Jordan talked about what had happened the night before, nor did they talk about Allexxiss. The show that night went off better and everyone seemed relieved.
Before long, it became evident to everyone that BJ and Jordan were once again a “thing” and Jordan began staying with BJ in his hotel room, and sleeping with him in the largest quarters on the bus. It became an unspoken union. It also wasn’t long before the newspapers started reporting on the apparent coupling of rock stars BJ Sparks and Jordan Tate. There were pictures of them holding hands and kissing quite often.
****
Allexxiss couldn’t help but see and hear the stories about BJ and Jordan. She did her best to ignore them, and made a point of digging in deeper on the movie. She also started accepting invitations from her co-star and supporting actors and actresses to have lunch, dinner, or attend parties they hosted. The press was once again on the case and started making up stories about Allexxiss dating her co-star Brent Howard. The press did their best to make every picture they captured of the co-stars about their “burgeoning romance” and kept linking it back to BJ asking, “Is Ramsey moving on from rock stars now?” Allexxiss was furious, but Max didn’t seemed bothered at all. Little did Allex know that Max himself was planting the seeds to make it look like Allex was indeed sleeping with her co-star. He figured it would not only put BJ farther from their lives, in case he got any funny ideas of coming back into Allex’s life, but it would also be good advertising for the movie. Max always had an angle.
****
Jordan got to Brenden’s room, just as he got the paper that morning. It had a picture of Allexxiss with Brent Howard in a passionate embrace. BJ had no way of knowing that the picture was taken from one of the scenes being shot for the upcoming movie. He shredded the paper as Jordan stood watching him calmly.
He eyed her suspiciously. “If you’re here to placate me, don’t bother.”
Jordan nodded, knowing him well enough to know that despite his tough tone and words, he was aching inside. Brenden stepped back out of the doorway so Jordan could enter. He saluted the photographers and reporters who’d witnessed the entire thing. Then he turned and walked inside, closing the door.
He walked over to the bar and poured himself a drink.
“Back to that again, huh?” Jordan asked mildly, sitting down on the couch.
“Yeah,” Brenden said, “what of it?”
Jordan nodded again, sensing his temper was near a boiling point.
“Beege, you know that they make shit up all the time …” she said gently.
The look he gave her was sour. “Yeah, and sometimes they’re right.”
“And a lot of time they’re only partly right or completely full of shit, and you know it.”
“Doesn’t fucking matter,” BJ practically spat.
“Yeah, I can see that …” Jordan said as she watched him down another shot.
“Just don’t judge, Jordie, okay?” he said gently. “You can’t know how this feels, right now,” he said, narrowing his eyes.
“Tell me, Brenden, then I can better understand.”
“On one hand I feel like the dumbest fuck on the planet … She glides back into our lives, gets me to back her movie, and then bam she’s back with hubby. Then on the other hand it’s killing me not to hunt her down and ask what the fuck happened … but… why? So she can laugh and tell me I’m an idiot? Fuck!” he yelled, his frustration level rising another degree.
He grabbed one of the ashtrays off the end table next to him and threw it across the room. It crashed into the wall. Jordan ducked, then glanced over to where it had hit. Glass lay shattered on the floor, with butts and ash scattered everywhere. There was also a hole in the wall. She looked back at Brenden.
“Why can’t you just try?” Jordan asked mildly.
“Why?” Brenden asked, his tone sneering. “Because I’m not in the mood to get completely destroyed, that’s why.”
She got up and sat next to him on the couch.
“I’m sorry, Beege, I really am …” Jordan said, at a loss for what else she could say.
****
Things stepped up when Brenden found out that Allexxiss was going to be in New York at the same time the tour would be. He considered rescheduling the show, but since it was sold out, he decided against it. Instead, to deal with the idea of being in the same town with her again, he stepped up his drinking. During the two weeks after Philadelphia, Brenden also picked up a cough that got worse and worse. Brenden took to chugging cough syrup with one hand and tequila with the other.
Jordan worried about him constantly, finally talking to Devlin to see if he could help. Devlin’s attempt to talk to Brenden ended in near violence. Brenden James Sparks did not like to be “managed” as he called it. He started saying he was doing his “rock star thing.”
It became more and more evident that Brenden was exhausted. Although he gave an incredible show every night, he was incoherent most other times. When they were on the bus, he spent a lot of time in his private area at the back where he had a room and bathroom. He would lock the door and lie on his bed drinking half the day. The other half he would spend tossing and turning trying to sleep.
By the time they pulled into New York, he was camouflaging his dark circles on a constant basis. Jordan noticed but wasn’t sure what to do.
The night of the New York show, Brenden sat in his dressing room, trying to breathe. He sat back, coughing. He felt pain in his chest when he coughed. He was sure it wasn’t a good thing, but didn’t have the energy or the time to check it. He picked up the bottle of cough syrup with codeine he’d gotten in the last town. It was amazing what you could flirt your way into with a young nurse these days. Taking a few big swigs of the cough syrup, he started stretching his neck. As usual, he went through a routine of push-ups, sit-ups, and stretches to get himself ready for the very physical performance he gave. He had to stop a number of times for coughing fits. At one point he reached up to wipe away what he thought was saliva, and found blood on the back of his hand.
“Shit,” he muttered to himself.
Brenden knew it was a bad sign, but refused to think about it any further. He took a few long drinks of tequila, calming his nerves and soothing his mind. Glancing at the clock on the wall he knew he had ten minutes before the tech knocked on the door telling him he had another five.
Ten minutes later, he’d fortified himself with enough tequila to get him through the show. He’d used makeup to cover up the darkening circles under his eyes. He walked out of his dressing room and glanced around. Tabitha walked up to him.
“Jordan is done, you’ve got five minutes,” she told him.
Brenden nodded, taking a slow deep breath to keep from launching into another round of coughing. The last thing he needed right now was for his daughter to catch a glimpse of blood on his mouth. She’d have a fit and he didn’t feel like he could deal with that.
“Daddy?” Tabitha queried, looking at him, her eyes worried.
“I’m okay, baby,” he said. “Just getting my head together.”
Tabitha nodded, but felt that there was something he wasn’t saying. She could sense easily that he was exhausted. She hoped they could catch a break here soon.
They started to walk to the stage Tabitha was ahead of him, so she didn’t see him pause when he felt lightheaded all of a sudden. With the iron will that had gotten him through countless times in his life, he forced away the feeling and continued walking.
Once he was on stage, h
e had enough to concentrate on to keep him from thinking. A couple of times he had to hold a desperate desire to cough until a break in a song. He was irritated because he knew he wasn’t singing his best, and waves of dizziness kept rolling over him the whole show. Finally, as the last song ended, he had a few minutes for a break.
He walked to the side of the stage and guzzled tequila to try to force away the coughing. He had to get through a duet with Jordan next and was really feeling it. His throat was constricting constantly, making him feel like he couldn’t breathe. Once again forcing aside the feeling of dizziness, he walked back out onto the stage to continue the concert. But by the time he ended the duet with Jordan, he was feeling like he was moving under cement. His limbs seemed to weigh a ton, and he started getting tunnel vision.
As thunderous applause rained down on them, Jordan glanced up at him, seeing how pale he was.
“Beege?” she said, her eyes wide and scared.
His breathing was labored, but he shook his head. Everyone else walked out on stage to take final bows. Brenden fell back behind them as his vision blurred again. He started walking toward the side stage. Jake was behind him, and saw Brenden stumble. He quickly put a hand on Brenden’s arm to steady him.
Tabitha was at the side stage watching. She’d watched her father the entire show, and knew something was wrong. She screamed as Brenden went down. Devlin, who had caught up with him just then, was there to help Jake grab him and ease him to the floor of the stage. There was a universal gasp from the crowd as they saw BJ Sparks collapse as he walked offstage.
Jordan was at Brenden’s side just as Tabitha reached her father. Devlin checked Brenden’s pulse and noticed it was fast. He looked at Jordan. “Have someone call 911 now. He’s unconscious and his pulse is racing.”
“Oh God,” Tabitha said.
“He’s okay, Tabitha,” Jordan assured her. “He’ll be fine. I think he’s just sick as hell.”
Devlin was at Tabitha’s side, his arm around her for support. Jordan knelt next to Brenden, checking his breathing and pulse until the paramedics arrived. They transported Brenden to the hospital minutes later. Tabitha and Devlin went with him. The rest of the group told them they’d be there as soon as possible.
Tabitha paced the halls, noting as people from the tour showed up. She smiled weakly at most of them. She was too worried to think of anything else. Devlin stood by, watching her closely. He knew she was walking off the worry she had, so he didn’t stop her.
“I should have done more,” Jordan said to Devlin.
“Like what?” Devlin asked. “Drag him to a doctor?”
“Maybe,” Jordan said stubbornly.
“Jord, you know as well as I do, that Brenden doesn’t do a damned thing until he wants to,” Devlin said.
Jordan sighed, shaking her head as she looked over at Tabitha.
“You think she’s going to be okay?” Jordan asked, nodding toward Tabitha.
Devlin nodded. “I’ll make sure of that.”
An hour later, everyone was there, and the doctor walked out to talk to Tabitha. Devlin walked up behind her, putting his hand on her back.
“Your father is going to be just fine,” the doctor was saying. “He has pneumonia, and it’s very involved. There is a buildup of fluid in the space between the lung and chest wall, it’s called pleural effusion. We’ve put in a breathing tube to help him breathe easier, and we’ll need to drain the fluid once he’s stabilized.”
“But he’s okay?” Tabitha asked, getting more and more scared with what the doctor said.
“He’s visibly exhausted and very sick, but with rest and medication he’ll recover just fine, Ms. Sparks,” the doctor said.
“Thank you,” Tabitha said, leaning against Devlin in relief.
“When can we see him?” Devlin asked.
“I’d like him to become more stable,” the doctor said, “so I’d say in about three hours.”
Devlin nodded. “Thank you, doctor.”
The doctor walked away, and Devlin went to tell everyone what the doctor had told them. Everyone was relieved that Brenden was going to be okay.
“I’d suggest everyone head back to the hotel,” Devlin said, used to taking charge when Brenden was incapacitated. “Plan on digging in here in New York. It looks like we’ll be here a while, as long as a week, maybe more.”
Everyone nodded. Little by little, people filtered out of the waiting room. Some walked over to Tabitha to hug her. Tabitha nodded, holding it together in front of everyone.
After everyone had left, Devlin held his arms out to Tabitha, and she stepped into them, finally giving into her need to cry. As he had almost her entire life, Devlin comforted her.
She’d finally calmed when her cell phone rang.
“Hello?” she queried.
“Tabitha, it’s Allexxiss, I heard what happened,” Allex said hesitantly, “Is he okay?”
Tabitha glanced up at Devlin, who was watching her face to try to determine who she was talking to.
“I, uh,” Tabitha said, trying to adjust her mind. She was so shocked to hear from her mother. “He’s got pneumonia,” she said simply, unable to think of how to reply.
Devlin canted his head to the side, then reached out and gently took the phone from Tabitha, thinking it might be a reporter. The last thing he wanted her dealing with was the vultures in the press harassing her.
“Hello?” he said crisply.
“Who is this?” Allexxiss queried.
“Devlin McGregor, who’s this?”
“It’s Allexxiss,” she said. “I heard what happened tonight. I wanted to know if Brenden was okay.”
Devlin nodded, his eyes on Tabitha. She was staring up at him, obviously still shocked by Allexxiss’ call. After all, this was the woman who had walked out on Brenden and Tabitha a few months ago without a word.
“He’s going to be fine,” Devlin said. “He needs some rest, but he’ll be fine,” he said, his tone crisp.
There was silence on the other end of the line for a moment. Devlin waited.
“We’re filming here in New York,” Allexxiss said quietly. “If it’s okay, I’d like to be there,” she said, her tone sure, but soft.
Devlin gave Tabitha a measured look. He’d always suspected there was more to Allexxiss’ desertion of Brenden and Tabitha than met the eye. It was too sudden. Something inside told him that this might be the opportunity they needed to work things out. He made a quick decision, praying he wasn’t wrong. Allexxiss had called after all, right?
“Yes, I think that’s a good idea,” he said.
Again, there was silence.
“Thank you, Devlin,” Allexxiss said, tears in her voice.
Allexxiss knew Devlin was risking Brenden’s wrath, as well as Tabitha’s by allowing her to come to the hospital. And she appreciated the chance.
“I’ll be there as soon as I can,” Allexxiss said.
“We’ll be here,” Devlin said.
They hung up.
“What?” Tabitha asked, not sure what his side of the conversation meant.
“Your mother is coming down here,” Devlin said, his tone no-nonsense.
“Why?” Tabitha asked, a suspicious look in her eye.
“Because she wants to be here, babe,” he said, his tone softening. “Tabbie, think about it, something wasn’t right about when she disappeared last time. It sounded like it was way too instant. Something isn’t right about that, you know it.”
Tabitha looked at him for a long moment, then nodded slowly. He was right, she had wondered why it had happened so fast. One minute she’d been so happy being back with Brenden, and the next she was in Jamaica with her husband? It had a false ring to it, but Tabitha had been so angry that it had hurt her father so deeply, that she refused to see past the facade put up to the world.
Less than an hour later, Allexxiss walked off the elevators. She wore no makeup, a sweat suit, and her long blond hair was in a braid down her back. It was obvi
ous she wasn’t doing this to impress anyone. When she saw Tabitha, she hesitated, unsure of how her daughter would react. She didn’t even know if Devlin had told Tabitha she was coming.
Tabitha glanced over and saw Allexxiss standing at the entrance to the waiting room. Tabitha got up from the chair she was sitting in next to Devlin, and walked straight over to her mother. Without a word, she threw her arms around Allex, and hugged her. Allex did the same, tears in her eyes instantly. They hugged for a few minutes, ignoring the paparazzi taking pictures of the entire scene.
“How is he?” Allexxiss asked, when they parted.
“They said he has pneumonia, that both his lungs have fluid around the outside or something like that.”
“But they said he’ll be okay?” Allexxiss asked.
“Yeah, they said he needed rest and medication, but he’d be okay.”
Allexxiss breathed a sigh of relief. “When I heard he’d collapsed, I just didn’t know …” she said, shaking her head.
Tabitha and Allex continued to talk and neither of them noticed Jordan slip out of the waiting room. Devlin watched her go, and noticed the narrowed look on her face. She wasn’t happy about Allexxiss being there. Jordan was, after all, one of Brenden’s best friends, she had been irate about what Allexxiss had done to him.
She walked down the hall, glancing at the names on the handwritten tags on the doors. She saw Brenden’s name on one of the tags. She glanced around and saw no one around, so she went in letting the door close quietly behind her. Brenden was in a private room. She walked over to the bed, noting the IVs in his hand and the breathing apparatus in his nose. He was unconscious. She leaned down to kiss his forehead. She found a chair and pushed it over to the corner, where the curtain partially hid the alcove. She sat there, watching her friend.
Three hours later, Tabitha got the okay to go in and see Brenden. Devlin suggested Allexxiss and her go in, he’d wait outside. Tabitha led the way, walking into the room where Brenden lay still unconscious. She was shocked at the way he looked. The dark circles he’d been managing to hide, were now completely uncovered. They looked almost like bruises they were so dark.
Sparks (Wild Irish Silence Book 1) Page 16
