Force of Nature

by Melissa Toppen

  I’m feet away from the barn when the door swings open. In my surprise, I jump back and scream at the same time.

  “What the hell?” Thad steps back, clearly startled by me as well.

  “You scared the crap out of me.” My heart thuds loudly in my chest. “I thought you went out with Chris and Ben?”

  “I was going to but decided I’d rather hang back here. Thought I’d check on the horses before I called it a night.” His eyes trail over my face in a way that makes every nerve ending in my body stand at attention. “What about you? What are you doing out here?”

  “I was bored.”

  “And you thought wandering around at night would offer a little excitement?” he teases.

  “Sure got my blood pumping.” I laugh, flattening my palm against my chest.

  “Well, you have fun with that.” He turns but before he can take a step my voice halts his movement.

  “Do you wanna come up to the house? Maybe have a drink with me?” I ask without really thinking it through.

  “I appreciate the offer but I think I’ll pass.”

  “You have something against hanging out with me?” I quip, trying to brush off the rejection with playful banter.

  “More like I have something against drinking.” He shifts to face me again, his hands going deep into the front pockets of his worn jeans.

  “Oh.” I hesitate, not sure how to respond. “Well we don’t have to drink. Are you hungry?” I ask, a little caught off guard.

  “That depends, what’s on the table?”

  “Um... I make a mean sugar cookie.” I laugh when his lip twitches. “Or I can make something a little heartier. Sandwiches are usually a fan favorite. I think we have turkey.”

  “How about both?” He tilts his head slightly and my heart instantly kicks into overdrive.

  “Only if you help.”

  “Sandwiches sound perfect.”

  “Yeah, thought so.” I laugh, shaking my head at him.

  “I need to take a quick shower first.” He gestures to his dirt and sweat covered t-shirt. “I’m gonna go grab a quick change of clothes and I’ll meet you up there.” He gestures toward the house.

  “Yeah, that sounds good,” I agree, suddenly feeling like I might bubble out of my own skin.

  “Okay.” His smile widens.

  “Okay.” Mine does too.

  It’s Thad who finally breaks the weird teenage-like interaction happening between us. Nodding once, he turns and takes off toward the camper, leaving me feeling a whole hell of a lot of things I should not be feeling after such an innocent conversation.

  —-

  I’ve just set our sandwiches and chips on the table when Thad appears from the hallway, freshly showered, his brown hair combed back from his face.

  He’s so good looking I find myself momentarily rendered immobile by the sight of him.

  “Hey.” He nods, crossing the kitchen toward me.

  “Hey,” I respond weakly, training my eyes downward as I slide into my chair.

  “These look great.” He takes the seat across from me, reaching for the glass of tea I set above his plate.

  “Thanks.” I shift, suddenly unsure of how to act.

  Thad on the other hand, seems completely at ease, which only further intensifies how off kilter I feel. Usually I’m the one oozing confidence, not shrinking into myself like a scared little girl who’s never seen a cute boy before.

  “So where did Ben and Chris end up going?” I ask, needing to fill the space.

  “Pretty sure they went to Thirsty’s,” he says, referring to the only decent bar within fifty miles of here.

  “That doesn’t surprise me. Guessing Chris roped Ben into driving him?” I state it like a question, but I already know the answer. Ben isn’t old enough to drink so it’s likely Chris tempted him with girls. My younger brother has always been smitten with the opposite sex. Some might even call him a player. He will tell you he’s just sampling the menu before making his selection.

  “Guessing so.” He nods, taking a bite of his sandwich.

  “And why didn’t you go again?” I ask, tearing off a corner of my sandwich before popping it into my mouth.

  “Not really my scene.” He swallows before answering.

  “Not much of a drinker.”

  “Something like that.”

  “You’re really good at evading questions.”

  “Maybe you just ask too many,” he counters with a smirk.

  “Maybe if you’d actually answer some I wouldn’t ask so many,” I quip.

  “Fine. Green.”

  “Green?” I question, having no idea what he’s talking about.

  “My favorite color.” He takes another bite of his sandwich, his eyes locked on mine as he chews.

  “I didn’t ask your favorite color,” I point out.

  “No, but if you did I would have told you it was green.”

  “So you’ll answer trivial questions, just nothing of any real significance.”

  “Now you’re catching on.” He chuckles.

  “Wow. Um, okay.” I think about it for a moment before deciding to play along. Truth be told, I want to know everything I can about him – trivial things included.

  “Birthday?”

  “January 25th.”

  “And you’re twenty-three?” I take a guess.

  “Twenty-four,” he corrects. “And you’re twenty-two.” He sounds so certain.

  “That would be an accurate statement.” I pop a chip into my mouth. “Favorite band?”

  “That’s easy, Blue October.” He takes a drink of tea. “This is really good by the way.”

  “That’s because unlike my mother who normally makes it, I love sugar.” I sit back in my chair and cross my arms over my chest, my sandwich left barely touched on the plate in front of me. “Favorite movie?” I keep going.

  “Die Hard.”

  “Really?” I crinkle my nose. “Die Hard. That’s the best you got?”

  “What can I say, I like Bruce Willis.”

  “Typical.” I shake my head.

  “Alright, Miss Judgmental. What’s your favorite movie?”

  “Rebel Without a Cause.”

  “Never seen it.”

  “What?” I practically scream across the table. “How is it you’re twenty-four years old and you’ve never seen one of the most classic movies of all time?”

  “I don’t know.” He shrugs. “I don’t watch a ton of television. Never have.”

  “I mean, I get that, but still. There are some movies you must see. You just must. And that is one of them. Hands down.” I straighten in my chair. “What are you doing right now?”

  “Um, eating?” He looks at me and then down at his plate like it’s some kind of trick question.

  “No, I mean after?”

  “I hadn’t thought that far ahead honestly.”

  “So no plans?”

  “Pretty sure you already know the answer to that. I’m sitting here with you, aren’t I?”

  “Then it’s settled.”

  “What is?” He hasn’t caught up and the confused look on his face is nothing short of adorable.

  “Were watching it,” I tell him. “Rebel Without a Cause. Finish your sandwich, then prepare for a cinematic experience like no other.”

  “You’re really into this stuff,” he observes, his mouth curving into a smile.

  “Considering it’s what I intend to spend the rest of my life doing, yeah, I’m really into it.”

  “And what if I don’t want to watch it?” He quirks a brow.

  “You don’t get a say. When someone says they haven’t seen Rebel Without a Cause, it is my duty to rectify the situation immediately.”

  “I’m tempted to decline, but something tells me if I try you’ll end up locking me in a room somewhere and forcing me to watch it against my will.”

  “You’re probably right,” I admit, both of us laughing in unison.

  “Fine. I’ll watc
h it. But under one condition.”

  “What’s that?”

  “We have to watch it in the camper.”

  “You have a T.V. in there?” I question.

  “Your dad gave me an old one he had in the garage. It isn’t much but it works and has a DVD player which is all you need, right?”

  “It is. But I don’t see the point in squeezing into that tiny camper when we have the whole house to ourselves.”

  “Your parents will likely be home soon and I like to stay out of their space as much as possible.”

  “They aren’t going to care if we watch a movie.”

  “I know. But it’s about me, not them. Those are my terms.”

  “Alright then. I accept your terms,” I concede, a little more excited than I should be about being cramped in that tiny camper with him for the next two hours.

  “Aren’t you going to finish your sandwich?” he asks as I stand.

  “I’m not really hungry,” I say, pushing in my chair.

  “Then why did you make yourself a sandwich?” he asks, popping the last bite of his into his mouth.

  “Truthfully, I don’t know.” I shrug, smiling when he gives me a bewildered look. “Stop looking at me like that.”

  “Like what?” He smirks.

  “Like you’re trying to figure out if I’m really an alien in human form.”

  “Maybe that’s exactly what I’m trying to figure out.”

  “Ha. Ha.” I mock, dropping my paper plate full of food into the trash can. “I’m going to go get the movie. Stay put.”

  “Yes, ma’am.” His smile widens.

  Shaking my head, not able to contain my own smile, I quickly exit the room, feeling Thad’s eyes follow me until I round the corner and disappear down the hall.

  Chapter Six

  “Where do we sit?” I look around the tiny camper, for some reason remembering it being so much bigger than it actually is.

  It’s a pop out camper, and while Thad keeps it very tidy, it’s certainly nothing fancy. There are two beds on each end of the camper and a tiny kitchen/eating space in the center with a built in bench and a small strip of counter space on the opposite side. There isn’t even a bathroom – which I guess isn’t an issue considering it’s only a few yards behind the main house.

  It’s clear that Thad uses the right side of the camper for storage. The bed on that side is stacked with boxes, books, and random items. The left bed is neatly made with a variety of pillows and a big navy comforter on top. There’s a small box television sitting on the countertop in the eating area, angled in the direction of the bed.

  “You’re looking at it,” he answers, gesturing toward the bed.

  “You expect me to lay in there with you?” I question, my voice thankfully not showing the nerves that suddenly flutter through me.

  “You got a better idea?” he asks, looking around.

  “How will I see the T.V?” I point to the ancient box that can’t have larger than a twenty inch screen.

  “I think you’ll manage, princess. Do you want me to watch this movie or not?”

  “Obviously. I’m here, aren’t I?” I prop a hand on my hip, choosing to ignore the princess comment.

  “Then stop bitching and get your ass in bed.” His lip twitches when my eyes go wide.

  “Fine.” I huff, shoving the DVD case into his hand before crawling into his bed on my hands and knees. “But if I hear one comment about getting me into your bed I swear to god I will throat punch your ass,” I warn, situating a couple pillows against the wall before turning and propping myself up against them.

  “I wouldn’t dream of it.” He chuckles, popping open the movie case before sliding the DVD into the player. He waits until it loads before switching off the light and climbing into bed with me.

  My entire body stiffens when he settles in next to me, so close our shoulders are touching. Granted, he doesn’t have a choice given how small the bed is, but something tells me he would have sat this close regardless. Or maybe that’s just wishful thinking. And my god does he smell good. I find myself taking a deep inhale through my nose, breathing him in.

  “You good?” He adjusts next to me, his arm brushing mine as he lifts the remote and hits play.

  “I’m good.” I keep my eyes forward, the tiny space suddenly feeling a lot smaller. “Now shut up and watch.”

  “Yes, Princess.”

  “And stop calling me princess,” I hiss.

  “Yes, Princess,” he repeats, a low laugh bubbling in his chest when I throw him a dirty look.

  “You’re pushing it, Thaddeus,” I warn.

  “Now you’re the one that’s pushing it.” He nudges his shoulder against mine. “My name is Thad.”

  “Just shut up and watch the movie, Thad,” I repeat, emphasizing his name with a roll of my eyes before turning my gaze forward. He laughs lightly in response before focusing on the television as the movie starts to play.

  It takes me a good thirty minutes to settle in enough to really get into the movie and even then I don’t fully relax. I can’t. Thad pressing up next to me makes that task impossible.

  I feel every move he makes, every shift, every unintentional brush of his hand against mine that I convince myself isn’t unintentional at all.

  Everything about this man puts me on edge. He makes me feel like a teenager all over again. My palms are sweating, my heart beat erratic, the butterflies in my stomach make me feel seconds away from taking flight.

  I can’t remember a time when a man has ever made me feel quite so unhinged without even touching me. Hell, I also can’t remember a time when I’ve laid in bed with a man and nothing physical happened. Probably because that’s never actually happened to me before. I mean sure, I’ve snuggled and watched television with guys before, but never have I made it this far into a movie without something happening.

  By the middle of the movie, I find myself watching Thad out of the corner of my eye more than the actual movie. I can’t help it. He’s just so beautiful. And beautiful is not a word I would normally use to describe someone like Thad, but that’s the only word that seems fitting.

  He really is beautiful. Especially his eyes. He has the kind of eyes that tell you everything and yet hold far too many secrets at the same time. Eyes that feel like they can see into your soul.

  Eventually I end up shifting onto my side facing Thad. With one arm tucked under the pillow my head is on, propping me up enough that I can still see the television, the other stretches across Thad’s stomach like it’s the most natural move I could make even though I didn’t intend on making it.

  The moment I realize what the hell I’ve done I start to withdraw, but when Thad’s hand settles over my forearm, keeping me in place, I stop.

  Without looking at him, I relax into our new position, a ball of excitement pinging around inside of me like a pinball machine.

  It’s so strange. I barely know him yet I feel like I’ve known him a lifetime. I’m oddly comfortable and yet unsettlingly uncomfortable around him at the same time. I feel relaxed and content lying in bed next to him, yet feel like I’m going to crawl out of my skin all in the same beat.

  I’m not sure at what point I start to doze, only that one minute my eyes feel super heavy and the next they’re closed, the sound of Thad’s even breathing lulling me into a hypnotic like state. The feel of his stomach rising and falling beneath my arm the last thing I remember before everything fades away.

  Chapter Seven

  I wake with a start, my eyes sweeping upward as I try to place where I am. It takes several long moments for the realization to dawn and once it does I fly up, clutching the blanket as I look around the tiny camper.

  I struggle to piece together how it is that I’m still here. I don’t remember falling asleep. Then again, when do you ever actually remember falling asleep?

  Remembering I wasn’t alone last night, I peer to my right. Relief floods through me when I see that Thad isn’t here, followed by a sl
ight wave of embarrassment. Did I snore? Oh god, what if I drooled? And then there’s the biggest question of all – if I slept here, where did Thad sleep?

  A vision of him curling into me as I slept flashes through my mind and I find that I like the thought probably a lot more than I should which is unsettling.

  Deciding I should get the hell out of here before someone realizes where I am and gets the wrong impression, I quickly crawl out of Thad’s bed. Slipping on the tennis shoes I left on the floor, I open the door a sliver and press my ear to the opening.

  When I’m fairly certain no one is around, I open the door just wide enough to peek my head out, looking both ways before pushing it the rest of the way open and quickly slipping outside.

  I climb down the two metal steps leading to the ground, my feet barely hitting the Earth before I hear a throat clear.

  Shit.

  My entire body goes stiff and I close my eyes, mentally preparing myself for what’s to come.

  Slowly turning my head, my stomach twists at the sight of my mom standing a few feet behind the camper where her vegetable garden is, a gardening hoe in her gloved hands.

  “Mom.”

  “I wondered where you were this morning at breakfast. Guess now I know,” she says indifferent, giving me no real read on her reaction to catching me sneaking out of Thad’s camper.

  “Sorry. I must have dozed off while Thad and I were watching a movie last night.”

  “Is that what you were doing?” She gives me a look that tells me she’s unsure.

  “What else would we be doing?” I say like it’s the most absurd question in the world, adjusting my ponytail as I close the few feet between us.

  “You’re a beautiful young girl. He’s an attractive man. I can use my imagination.”

  “Mom!” I act completely appalled by the thought. “It’s not like that. I barely know the guy.”

  “You’re right, you don’t,” she says in a way that tells me she knows a hell of a lot more than I do.

  “What’s that mean?”

  “Thad’s a good person; I truly believe that. If I didn’t he wouldn’t be here. But he’s had a pretty rough way to go over the last few years and he brings with him much more baggage than you could ever imagine. I don’t want to see you get tied up in that.”