by Lisa Kessler
Did I? I’d brought Nadya to Pyramid Lake before I discovered she was my mate. It hadn’t been instinct. I just couldn’t bear the thought of sending her away when she looked so lost.
Would I have cared if she were anyone else? Probably not. I gave Chloe’s hand a squeeze. “Tell me about the Dream Walkers.”
Her eyes brightened. Any chance to talk about our ancestors lit her up like a lighthouse. “They mastered the art of journeying through their dream state, to comfort and heal another person. Their spirit travels without their body. Our tribe hasn’t had a Dream Walker in generations. Why?”
“I don’t have time to explain.” I stood and went to the door before she could pin me down with more questions. “I’ve gotta ride over to the garage and get some sleep. Aren’s getting married tomorrow.”
She came over and gave me a hug, her voice soft against my ear. “Be open, Osa. It is the only way to heal.”
I rode over to the Stone Mother and turned off the Harley. Sitting in the silence, I looked up at her bowed head. Loving someone enough to weep a lake’s worth of tears was something I understood, even though I’d never allowed myself to cry.
When our parents were killed by the drunk driver, Gabe wept, and I closed my heart. I told myself I had to be strong for my brother. For the rest of his life, I stood tall, holding him up as best I could.
And when Adam told me a jaguar murdered Gabe, my heart shriveled up and died in my chest. I tried to cry for him, but I didn’t remember how. Maybe I never knew.
I walked closer and sat at the water’s edge, staring up at her. “Chloe says I need to open myself, but I don’t know how.”
The lake lapped against the stone of her legs. This was nuts. Did I seriously think she’d answer me? I closed my eyes, taking a deep breath. When I opened them, I kept my focus on the smooth water.
“I felt her pain, Mother. She needed me and somehow I went to her in my dreams. Will I be able to help her again?”
I paused and glanced up. A hawk circled above us and finally came to land on the natural rock pyramid beside the Stone Mother. Hawks were a sign from the other side, bringing messages from our ancestors.
As a child, I never questioned the omens and animal guides, but losing everyone I cared about blotted out faith in anything except the reality that death waited for all of us.
“Gabe, if you’re there, I’m sorry. I should’ve been with you that night. We were too cocky and sure of ourselves.” The hawk launched itself back into the air, gliding just above the water. For once, mentioning his name didn’t make me angry or tense. Maybe there was healing here after all.
I didn’t know what any of it meant. Could I be a Dream Walker, or was it a one-time miracle? Did the hawk show up as a sign that Gabe still walked beside me, or was it just a reminder to trust my intuition?
Hell if I knew.
I got up and went back to my bike. My mind buzzed with unanswerable questions on the drive home. When I rolled up to the garage, I unlocked the door and rode the bike inside. The familiarity of my place embraced me, easing my frayed nerves. Tossing the keys on the counter, I headed for my studio apartment in the back.
Being in my own bed was a luxury. I rubbed my hands down my face, still a little stunned to find myself back in Reno. I was seriously considering going to Aren’s wedding. Nadya would be there. Would she hate me? Would everyone else?
Did I give a crap?
I closed my eyes and her beautiful face filled my mind. I could love that woman in a heartbeat. Maybe I already did. It would be the easiest thing I’d ever done. And strangely enough, I didn’t think my feelings had anything to do with my wolf. I’d been drawn to her before I ever touched her and discovered she was my mate.
Being near her made me want to see her smile, to hear her laugh. Not something I’d ever experienced before. And I’d never known another woman who could look death in the eye and still move forward. She was fearless. And the moment we kissed, she’d given me a glimpse of the passion brewing inside of her.
I growled and rolled over, burying my head under a pillow. I must be insane.
Losing her would be the most agonizing thing I’d ever faced. I didn’t have the strength to allow her life to slip through my fingers.
But knowing I walked away and left her to fight alone would be worse.
In the end, giving up the chance to hear her laugh, see her smile, and taste her lips because I was afraid… It would eat me alive. Nadya deserved a better mate than me, but I would do my best to step up and be the man she needed.
If she still wanted me.
Chapter Thirteen
Nadya
The alarm went off early in the morning. For a second, I stared at the numbers while I counted the days of the week in my head. This was Saturday…
Sasha’s wedding.
With a busy day ahead, I dashed into the shower, eager to get started on the wedding to-do list. The hot water loosened my muscles and my mind wandered. Part of me had hoped I’d see Gareth again in my dreams. I tried not to think about him, but so far I was failing pretty miserably. I understood his pain and even a little bit of his anger. He’d lost all his family members, so I could imagine discovering your mate was also dying seemed pretty unfair.
But in spite of clear, rational thought, it still stung. My mate kissed me and then ran for the hills. Tough not to take that personally. We didn’t know each other very well. Another great excuse that I did my best to cling to, but the moment we kissed, a jolt of awareness ran through every fiber of my body, all the way into my soul. Hadn’t he felt it, too?
I’d replayed that night in my head countless times over the past few days, and I kept tripping over the same thing. Nothing could have made me walk out that door.
But Gareth did.
He never looked back, hadn’t called or texted. Maybe he hadn’t shared the connection I did. I probably wouldn’t ever find out, and that hurt, too.
I rinsed my hair and washed the fresh tears from my cheeks. His face was still clear in my mind, every angle of his jaw, his dark eyes, and that rare smile he shared with me and very few others. The warm water embraced me, and for a moment, I caught Gareth’s masculine scent as if I were back in his arms. My lips tingled with his kiss as I ran my hands up his tanned, muscled chest.
His rough hands slid down my back, firm and possessive over my butt, pressing my hips tight against him. His erection throbbed, rubbing me until my body ached for more. I wanted to feel our bodies united. I wanted to forget where I ended and he began.
The sound of my own moan echoed through the bathroom, snapping me out of the fantasy. I opened my eyes, reality cooling the smoldering heat gathering low in my abdomen. Gareth wasn’t here. He’d never be here.
Somewhere deep inside, the wolf let out a longing howl.
…
This was my first visit to Sloan Consulting’s cabin in Lake Tahoe, and as soon as Sasha turned the car into the driveway, my jaw went slack. “This is a cabin?”
“That was my reaction, too.” Sasha grinned, turning off the engine. “I was expecting a log cabin like Little House on the Prairie the first time Aren brought me here. Apparently Sloan Consulting has a different definition of roughing it in the mountains than we do.”
We got out of the car and I couldn’t help gawking up at the massive stained wood structure. It had two stories, complete with three gables on the roof, and the double entry doors were full of leaded glass.
“It’s gorgeous.”
“Wait until you see the back.” Sasha tugged my arm and headed for the trunk. “Let’s get all this stuff inside and I’ll give you a tour.”
I carried the garment bags with our dresses, and Sasha handled the plastic tub we’d loaded with makeup and hair supplies. At the top of the stone entry stairs, the door opened and Lana smiled at us.
“Need any help?”
Sasha shook her head. “I think we’ve got it. Thanks for grabbing the door, though.”
Lana opened t
he oak door all the way, then closed it behind us.
I glanced around. “Are Madeleine and Malcolm here?” The cabin was impossibly quiet, unless the little ones were asleep.
“Adam’s in charge of keeping them entertained until right before the ceremony. Two rough-and-tumble toddlers wouldn’t be much help while we’re setting up.”
Those two rough-and-tumble toddlers always listed my spirits, but it was probably for the best that Lana had them occupied and out from under our feet today. “Where should I put the dresses?”
Lana pointed toward the stairs. “There’s a master bedroom with a private bathroom up the stairs to your right.”
“Sounds perfect.” Sasha headed for the staircase.
I started to follow, but Lana caught my arm. She placed her finger over her lips. I nodded and called to my sister. “I’ll be right up.”
“Okay.” Sasha disappeared upstairs.
I turned to Lana. “Everything okay?”
“That’s what I was going to ask you. I’ve heard things from Aren, but I wanted to talk to you directly.”
I laid the garment bags over the back of the couch and glanced up toward the hall where Sasha had gone before I met Lana’s eyes. I kept my voice low. “I’m all right.”
“We heard about Gareth.”
Just hearing her say his name stirred up a tempest of pain. I pressed my lips together, rejecting the ache for my mate. If I was going to cry today, they were going to be happy tears for Sasha.
Her eyes softened and her compassion embraced me like a mother’s hug. “I just wanted to give you a heads-up that we’re not expecting him to show up, so we shifted the wedding party around. Jason will walk with you.” She took my hand. “I wish there was something I could do to help. You don’t deserve any of this.”
A humorless laugh escaped my lips. “I’ve heard that before.” I gave her hand a squeeze. “I’ll be fine. Thanks for letting me know about Jason.”
“He really cares about you.”
“That’s the kicker. He’s handsome, smart, and any woman would be lucky to catch his eye, but this wolf inside me made her choice and I wish I could say I wanted to convince her to choose someone else but…” My voice wobbled as I dabbed a tear from my eye. “But before I was even bitten, I wanted to get to know Gareth, to understand the man underneath that tough exterior. Bad boys aren’t usually my type, but…” I shook my head and reached for the dresses. “I better take these up.”
I hustled for the stairs before Lana could say anything else. With each stair, I envisioned tightening the lid on my feelings and rebuilding the wall around myself to keep the emotions of the others at a distance.
“There you are.” Sasha took the garment bags and hung them in the closet. The view of Lake Tahoe out the bedroom window stole my breath.
“It’s gorgeous.”
She turned, following my gaze. “Isn’t it? Come on, we’ve got a few minutes before we need to get ready. I’ll show you around.”
After peering in at the three other bedrooms upstairs, we made our way down to the main living room. The sand-colored Berber carpet blended perfectly with the rustic furnishings to give the cabin a warm, masculine feel. Through the French doors, the lake shimmered in the sunlight as if magic danced on the water.
Lana walked past the window, setting up chairs outside. Sasha went to the door and opened it. “Hey Lana, need any help out here?”
I followed and noticed Luke and Logan at the other end of the huge deck, plugging in wires and setting up microphones.
“We’ve got it.” Lana smiled at both of us. “Jared should be here soon with the wedding arch, and Jason is bringing the flowers.”
I wandered over to the corner where Luke and his twin, Logan, were duct-taping wires together. Leaning against the wooden railing, I stared out at the lake, drinking in the beauty. This was a perfect place for a lifelong commitment with all of nature witnessing the union.
“Hey, Nadya, can you hold this for a second?”
I turned around to find Logan holding up a bundle of cords. “Sure.”
He wrapped them in red duct tape while I did my best to keep the wires steady. Logan was a couple of years younger than me with a velvety voice that melted audiences all over the state. He and his band, The Howlers, would be playing later tonight. The rest of his band wouldn’t be here until after the ceremony.
The wedding was for Pack only.
His shoulder-length hair was tied back in a ponytail, accentuating the strong line of his jaw. He raised his ice blue eyes to meet mine. “Thanks.”
He took the bundled cords from me, and I forgot to speak. Rock star mystique clung to Logan like a second skin. I’d been introduced to him when I first arrived in Reno and I’d even talked with him a few times, but I didn’t feel like I really knew him. Strange sensation for me. Even with my empathic talents, all I usually got from him was a sense of a cool breeze, a mellow old spirit dwelling inside the body of a hot lead singer.
I sensed that very few people knew the real Logan. Maybe that was how he liked it.
He started to turn away and my brain finally kicked back in. “No problem.”
Oh yeah, I was cool.
Sasha walked over and leaned on the railing beside me. “We should probably go up and get ready.” She glanced my way. “You all right?”
“I’m better when everyone stops asking me that.”
“After the other night—”
“I feel fine now. That’s enough for me.” I bit back the swell of aggression. She was my big sister, of course she worried about me, but the poison in my veins that boosted my adrenaline levels also shortened a temper that I’d never had before. Staring at the lake, I imagined it cooling my nerves. Finally I added, “Today is your day. Your attention should be on Aren, not me.”
She smiled, easing the tension in my muscles. “Okay, you win. No worries today.” She draped her arm around my shoulders. “Let’s get this show started.”
…
Doors opened and closed downstairs as the rest of the Pack arrived. I lifted the veil from the garment bag and helped my sister place it in her hair. Seeing Sasha in her dress and veil filled my heart to bursting. She stared in the mirror and dabbed a tear. My sister wasn’t much of a crier, but her emotions were deep, palpable as they surrounded me.
“I wish Mom and Dad were here.” Her voice hitched and I handed her a tissue. “I guess I never really thought I’d get married, but now that I am…”
I stood beside her, staring at her reflection in the mirror. She’d never looked more stunning. “I think they’re with us right now. We can’t see them, but their love is here.” I rested my hand over my heart. “I bet they’re both so proud of you. You took care of me when I needed you most and put your own needs second. And now you finally found a worthy partner to take care of you.”
She nodded and looked my way. “I love you, Nadya. You were never a burden.”
Sasha embraced me. Tight. I clung to my sister, closing my eyes and wishing all the love between us could heal me. Where was my fairy godmother when I needed her?
I took a step back, grabbing a tissue for myself. “We’re going to smear all our makeup.”
“Yeah, no more crying.” She dried her eyes and tossed the tissue in the wastebasket. “So you’ll go down and let Adam know I’m ready?”
“I will.” I gave her hand one last squeeze and headed downstairs.
Since our father wasn’t here to walk Sasha down the aisle, Adam volunteered. He was the Pack Alpha and Aren’s twin brother, so it seemed like the right choice. He’d bring Sasha downstairs and out onto the deck at the rear of the cabin for the ceremony.
The whole downstairs bustled with activity. The second my feet hit the hardwood floor, I heard the familiar squeals of Lana and Adam’s twins. I knelt down just as they scrambled toward me and hugged me around the neck. They smelled like baby shampoo and Honey Nut Cheerios, their favorite snack. I held Malcolm out and marveled at how adorabl
e he looked in his tiny tuxedo.
“You look so handsome.”
Even with his pudgy cheeks, his light green eyes betrayed an older soul. He grinned and spouted off his new favorite word. “No!”
Lana came around the corner and scooped him up. “They escaped their daddy.”
Adam stepped up, smiling. “They heard Nadya come downstairs and the Hulk himself couldn’t have stopped them from getting to her.”
Madeleine loosened her grip and pulled away, fanning out her lace dress. “Pretty!”
I nodded, unable to hold back a chuckle. “You’re beautiful.”
“Pretty!” She corrected me and leaned in to place a wet kiss on my cheek.
I straightened up, taking Madeleine’s hand. “Sasha’s ready whenever you are.”
Adam glanced around at the controlled chaos of last-minute preparations. “We might need a little more time.”
The door opened behind us and Jason filled the doorway, carrying a box full of flowers. Seeing him in a perfectly cut tuxedo should’ve made my knees weak. He was gorgeous. But my body didn’t care. So weird.
His gaze swept the room. “There’s another box in my car.” His eyes met mine as he came in. “You look incredible,” he murmured as he passed by to go out onto the deck.
I gave Madeleine’s hand a squeeze. “Should we go outside?”
“Outside!” She squealed.
How could I resist? Once she and her brother mastered speaking in full sentences, the Pack was going to be in for trouble.
We walked outside and found Jason setting the flower arrangements on either side of the gorgeous wedding arch his brother had built. He turned my way and grinned. “You brought me some help.”
Madeleine tugged at my hand and bolted toward Jason’s open arms. He swooped her up and gave her a loose rose bloom. “Here ya go, princess.”
She wrapped her fingers around the stem, already twisting in his arms. “Mommy!”
“You want to show your mom?”
She nodded and Jason placed her back on the ground. We watched her toddle back inside and he crossed to stand beside me. “Can we talk?”
