Hot for Fireman

by Jennifer Bernard

  “What is it with you and that dude?” he asked suddenly. “You really like him?”

  Katie wished she’d gotten a drink to hide behind. Taking a gulp of latte might give her a moment to figure out how to handle that question. Might as well go for the truth. “It’s more than that. I love him.”

  “ ’Cause he’s good-looking.”

  “No. It’s not that. I’m sorry, Doug. But that’s the way it is.”

  “What about him?” His lip curled. “He’s got girls all over him.”

  “I think he likes me. But you’d have to ask him, and right now . . . Oh my God, Doug.”

  He started. “What?”

  “Did you . . . Were you trying to . . . kill Ryan?”

  “No! Jesus, Katie. I already said I didn’t do it.”

  “Well, I don’t believe you.”

  “Fuck. You’re so sure your pretty boy is so perfect? It’s like everyone’s saying. He started it to be the big hero. Those guys are like that. I looked it up on the Internet. Firemen are addicted to adrenaline. They like the rush of being the hotshot. That’s how they get their kicks. I can’t believe you fell for someone like that. It’s not like you need a lot of brains to put out fires.”

  Katie sat back in her seat and bit her lip to keep from screaming at him. Had he always been this petty?

  “Did you know firemen never wear wedding rings? I got that off the Internet too. They say it’s because the metal would burn their fingers, but that’s not the real reason. It’s because they cheat. Everyone knows it.”

  “Stop it, Doug!”

  But he didn’t stop. Katie had the childish urge to stick her fingers in her ears and chant “la-la-la” until he’d finished. But it was high time she made herself see Doug, the real, grown-up Doug, for who he was. So she shut her mouth tight and listened to him rant.

  “They have girls after them all the time, like basketball players. You really think Ryan would stick by you like I did? Get real, Katie. I mean, you’re cute, but you’re no Logan Marquez. He went home with her, you know. She told me so.”

  She crossed her arms and let his poisonous words flow around her.

  “He’s going to dump you in a hurry as soon as the next gorgeous girl comes along. You’ve seen the girls hanging on him. You think you can compete with that?”

  “Gee, thanks for the vote of confidence.”

  “Come on, Gidget, I’ve always been there for you. When are you going to wake up and see this Ryan dude is no good for you?”

  She stared at him, light dawning. “That fire was you, trying to wake me up? Make me think Ryan’s an arsonist burning down the bar so my family loses everything, even the insurance money?”

  “No.” Doug jerked his head up, his eyes scuttling from side to side. “The fire happened before the insurance policy ran out.”

  A shiver of shock bolted Katie to her chair. She’d suspected, she’d accused, but to hear him virtually admit it . . . “So you planned it for yesterday on purpose. So the insurance would still cover us.”

  “No!” Doug crumbled bits of scone between his fingers, littering the table in front of him. “I didn’t say that. You’re twisting everything around. I’m just saying it’s better than after the insurance runs out, right?”

  “What’s the difference? Like Carson Smith said, if they can make a good faith allegation that he set the fire, and did it on our behalf, the insurance company won’t pay. There’s all these suspicious-looking things they can twist around. Even if you tell the truth, they probably won’t pay because of our relationship.”

  His mouth opened and closed. He looked like a fish flopping on a beach. “I . . . uh . . . I’ll be right back.” He slid back his chair and slouched toward the bathroom. Katie shook her head in disbelief. Typical Doug, off for a quick hit so he could finish the conversation. When things get tough, get stoned. That was his motto.

  She shuddered. Thank God she’d never been tempted to join him in his pot habit. In fact, he’d been the biggest factor in her decision not to. He was a walking advertisement against weed. How many of his boneheaded decisions had been made under the influence? Had this one?

  The thought of him getting high, then endangering the lives of two people, one of them a child, made her want to rip his head off.

  He plopped back onto his chair, red-eyed but much more relaxed.

  “Feel better?” she asked, with a mirthless smile.

  “Yeah, dude. Things were getting a little intense there.” He rubbed a hand across his eyes and shook back his hair, degenerate rock star–style.

  Katie didn’t want to spend one more minute in his company. But she still had a mission to complete. “Doug, this is how I see it.” She put both elbows on the table and fixed him with her best stern-but-fair look. “You’ve completely screwed up, in so many ways I don’t even know where to start. You nearly killed two people. You ruined my father’s business and now he probably won’t even get the insurance money. And an innocent, non-fire-starting person is about to take the blame for what you did. If you think I would ever get back together with someone who did those things, you’re more stupid than I ever imagined. There’s only one thing you can do to make up for all this.”

  Doug squinted at her. He scratched at the edge of his cast.

  “You can step up and admit what you did. We still probably won’t get the insurance money. But at least Ryan won’t be charged.”

  “But . . .” He scratched his chin. “Then they’d charge me.”

  “For what you did.”

  “I never said that. You’re trying to confuse me.”

  Katie slammed her hands on the table and stood up. “Man up, Doug. Whatever you did, tell the truth. That’s all I ask.”

  “Way, way, way, wait a second.” He shot her a blurry smile. “Got an idea. If I say I did it, will you get rid of Ryan? That’s all I want. He can . . .” He flicked the fingers of his good hand. “Go away. Somewhere else.”

  White rage flashed through her. “You. Are. Pathetic. I’m sick of you trying to control me. I’m not falling for your crap anymore. I can’t believe I fell for it this long. We’re done. Forever. I thought we could be friends, but I was so, so wrong. Never talk to me again. Ever.”

  “But Katie . . .” he whined, the reality of the situation apparently penetrating his marijuana haze.

  “Ever.”

  She swung away from him and stalked out of the coffeehouse, barely conscious of the curious looks from behind laptops and coffee cups.

  She yanked open the door of her Datsun, sat down in the driver’s seat, trembling, and slammed the door shut. Energy still surged through her. It had taken eight plus years to finally tell Doug where he could stick it. Why had it taken her so long to see him for what he was? She grabbed the steering wheel and took deep breaths, trying to get a grip on her emotions. Doug, Ryan, the bar, her family . . . everything swirled around her in a confused mess.

  In the middle of it all, one thought surfaced. Yes, she’d finally told Doug off. But now, the chances of his confessing to his crime were zero.

  When Katie got back to the hospital, Melissa stood at his bedside, holding Danielle by the hand. Ryan looked as unconscious as ever. Melissa had stopped by a few times, but she hadn’t brought Dani until now.

  “They stopped the phenobarbital a few hours ago,” Melissa told her.

  “But he’s not awake yet,” she said, stating the obvious. She felt silly as soon as she said it.

  “Not yet. Should be soon. Danielle wants to be here when he comes out of it. They finally allowed her to come.”

  Danielle looked up at Katie. Her eyes looked huge in her little face.

  “How are you doing, kiddo?” Katie asked her, bending down to her level. As someone who knew how it felt to always be looking up at everyone, she liked to get eye-to-eye with kids.

  “We jumped out the window.”

  “I know. You sure were brave.”

  “It didn’t feel like flying. It felt like, flo
p. Boom.” The little girl mimicked a diving motion with her hand.

  “Not fun at all, huh?”

  She shook her head solemnly. “Is he going to wake up soon?”

  “Well, the doctor said it takes between four and six hours. Maybe if you talk to him a little, he’ll wake up even sooner.”

  Her dark eyes lit up. “I can tell him about my new bunny rabbit.”

  “Perfect.”

  Danielle scooted closer to the bed. She leaned her elbows on the edge and stretched confidingly toward Ryan. “It’s private,” she warned Katie and Melissa over her shoulder.

  “We’ll be right over here,” said Melissa, smiling and backing away.

  Katie grabbed her chance and followed Melissa to the foot of the bed. “Can I talk to you for a minute?”

  “Sure. I’ve been wanting to talk to you too.”

  “Have you heard what they’re saying about Ryan?”

  “Who hasn’t?” Melissa rolled her eyes. “I always say the only places more gossipy than newsrooms and hair salons are firehouses. Everyone’s talking about what happened.”

  “So Captain Brody, your husband . . . he’s heard the rumors?”

  “Yes.”

  “He doesn’t believe them, does he?” In her anxiety, Katie grabbed Melissa’s arm.

  “It’s not up to him. He’s not an arson investigator. He’ll have to abide by whatever the investigation turns up.”

  Katie stared at the older woman, biting her lip. She liked Melissa, how calm and cool under pressure she seemed, how unique in her own particular beauty, with her deep green eyes and hair like bittersweet chocolate. “The thing is, I know Ryan didn’t do it, and I think I know who did, but I don’t have any proof. I don’t want Ryan to get blamed. You still do investigations, don’t you? For the news?”

  Melissa shook her head gently. “I’m sorry, Katie. I understand how you feel, but I can’t touch this one. It’s a little too close to home. Ryan’s like a brother to me. And Danielle was nearly—” She broke off.

  Katie took her hand. “I’m so sorry. It must have been so awful for you.”

  Melissa took a moment to pull herself together. “Do you know what she did after they landed on the lawn outside the bar?”

  “No, what?”

  “She wouldn’t leave Ryan’s side. She just kept yelling and calling for help. She’d had an asthma attack inside. But Ryan had talked her through it. She wouldn’t leave him. Fortunately, she has an ear-splitting scream. Someone heard her right away and came running. But, God, when I think about it . . .”

  Sympathetic tears welled into Katie’s eyes, somewhat to her surprise. She thought she’d cried all her tears already. The two women clasped each other’s hands, picturing the frightful moment.

  A weak, scratchy voice interrupted them. “So that’s what that god-awful racket was.”

  Katie spun around. Where Ryan’s eyes had been closed a few minutes ago, she now saw the merest hint, the narrowest slit of blue. A tiny smile tugged at one corner of his mouth.

  Danielle jumped up and down. “I woke him up! Mama, I woke him up!”

  Melissa yanked open the curtain and called into the corridor. “Nurses! Doctors! Come quick!”

  Katie couldn’t move. She wanted to fling herself on top of him, kiss him all over his swollen face. But would he want her to, especially once he knew about all the craziness going on?

  Besides, Danielle was way ahead of her. Her first shock gone, she climbed up on the bed next to him. “I woke you up!”

  “Yeah you did. How are you, kiddo? Breathing okay?”

  She nodded and put her little arms all the way around his chest and hugged him tight.

  A wince tightened Ryan’s face.

  “Sweetie, his ribs,” warned Katie, coming forward. Danielle loosened her grip but stayed right where she was.

  “Ribs?” Ryan’s eyes opened a crack wider, wide enough to meet Katie’s.

  “Yep. And your tibia.”

  “Oh, that old thing.” He attempted a smile that wound up looking ghoulish. “Never broken one of those before.” He lifted a hand off the bed, beckoning to Katie. “You’re so far away.”

  She hesitated, a second too long. In the next moment, a swirl of white coats and blue scrubs surrounded Ryan and swept him away into very serious and important medical chatter.

  Chapter Twenty-Six

  Ryan followed the doctors’ instructions, taking a deep breath when he was told to, following a penlight from left to right. The tiniest movement seemed to take an enormous effort. Even his thoughts felt like thick pea soup. But not green. More like heavy gray sludge. The doctors seemed very concerned about his eyesight, which seemed fine except for some weird dancing spots.

  The medical people sent Katie, Melissa, and Danielle away while they did their testing. Ryan didn’t mind. He was too exhausted to talk to anyone. And besides, hurt nagged at him. Why hadn’t Katie looked happier to see him? Her eyebrows had been drawn together, her face had gone pale. Something was wrong, but figuring it out felt impossible. Only one thing felt doable right now.

  He closed his eyes and sledded back into sleep.

  The next time he woke up, he felt a hundred times better. A different batch of people gathered at his bedside. Vader and Joe the Toe gazed down at him like two buff bodyguards. At first they were a little blurry, but with some concentration he was able to focus on them. The spots didn’t seem as bad as before.

  “Why’d they let you guys in? Did you beat up the security guards?”

  He must be feeling better, if he could rag on them. He sat up, then leaned against the pillows as a wave of dizziness passed over him.

  “We offered your home phone number to some nurses,” said Vader.

  Joe the Toe glared at Vader. “Nurses are professionals and certainly don’t deserve your sexist drivel.”

  “My what? All I heard was ‘sex.’ ”

  Joe the Toe ignored Vader and focused on Ryan. “All your tests show you’re recovering like the magnificent specimen you appear to be. Are you feeling better?”

  “Yeah, actually.” He blinked and shook his head, testing the effects of movement. No pain. No more dizziness after that initial rush. “I can think now. When I first woke up I was seeing stars and my head felt like a puddle of molasses.”

  “Do you remember what happened?”

  Chaotic images flashed through his mind. Danielle’s nostrils turning sooty. His cell phone disappearing across the floor. Breathing in the bitter, acrid smoke. The determined roar of the fire. The long drop from the window. The all-encompassing pain.

  “I think I do. I dove out the window with Danielle. She’s okay, I saw her when I woke up. No injuries. Gutsy little thing.”

  “What do you expect? She’s the captain’s daughter,” said Vader.

  “True, that.” Ryan smiled, remembering how brave she’d been.

  Joe dragged over an armchair and settled his bulk into it. He steepled his fingers and gave Ryan a serious, professorlike look. “We finagled our way in here because we felt you ought to know what’s being said.”

  “Said?” Ryan looked from Joe to Vader, who suddenly seemed extremely worried about his own feet.

  “The fire was deliberately set.”

  “I know. They set fires, in front and behind. Maybe on the other side too. Don’t know. They used some kind of accelerant.”

  “They’re saying—” Joe broke off.

  Vader, still analyzing his own feet, continued the thought. “They’re saying it must have been a pro. Someone on the force. And since you worked there, well . . . They’re fucked in the head if they think you could do that. Fucked. But no one’s asking us.”

  Ryan’s jaw fell open. The room tilted around him like a ship hitting a reef. He grabbed onto the bedsheets to steady himself. “You mean . . . they think . . .” He couldn’t finish.

  “Doug, that friend of Katie’s, is saying he saw you there,” said Vader, as if every word was a sharp razor blade he
had to spit out.

  “Yeah, I was there. Nearly getting burned to death.” He fought back the panic. Accused of arson. “Why would I . . .” He realized he was yelling, and brought down his voice. “Why would I set a fire with myself inside? Not to mention Danielle?”

  “Calm yourself,” said Joe, putting a giant hand on his shoulder. Ryan shook it off angrily. “If they think we’re upsetting you, they’ll eject us.”

  It took every ounce of willpower Ryan possessed to settle down. He dredged up a breathing exercise he’d learned at the monastery. In, out, in, out. “Okay, I’m okay. Go on. Explain to me why I’d nearly incinerate myself and a little girl.”

  “You’re angry at the wrong people. We don’t believe any of this blasted rubbish, or we wouldn’t be here.”

  “You’re right, you’re right. Thank you. Go on.”

  Joe picked up a large cup with a straw and handed it to Ryan. “Sippy cup. Drink.”

  Obediently Ryan took a long swig of cool water. It helped. He nodded to Joe. “Let me have it.”

  “All right. I’m going to tell you everything so you can be prepared. Vader and I thought it best. But don’t believe for a second that simply because you’re in a hospital bed, I won’t defend myself if you forget and try to take your anger out on me. I outweigh you and I haven’t been unconscious for three days.”

  “I’m not going to whup your ass. Though I could,” muttered Ryan. “Even from a hospital bed.”

  Joe the Toe ignored that. “Two things. Point one. They’re speculating that you wanted to play the hero to get back on the force. Your past record of impulsive, life-threatening actions is considered to support that theory.”

  “I saved lives with those actions! And I saved Danielle.”

  “But risked your own life. Why? Because you’re hooked on the rush. You’re not so much a fireman as a junkie, according to this scenario. And as a junkie deprived of his fix for a year and a half, you couldn’t resist the opportunity for a blaze of glory, so to speak.”

  “Bullshit.”

  “Point two,” continued Joe, ruthlessly. “You’d conceived a liking, a tendre, for Miss Katie Dane. You knew the bar was in financial trouble, so you decided a fire would be the ultimate form of courtship, one that would make sense given your training.”