Free Spirit

by Andi Bremner

  His hands cupped her face, his thumbs stroking her cheeks as he continued to kiss her. His tongue swiped her bottom lip, eliciting a shiver from her, before he sucked it between his lips, biting and nibbling her. Juliette let him sweep her away in the kiss that he commanded. He needed something from her, something had made him come to her like he had, and she was going to give him whatever he needed.

  Her hands rested on his arms as she tilted her head up to him. Her stomach tightened and she felt a knot of desire begin to form in her lower belly. She wanted to move closer to him, she wanted to pull him to her, wrap her legs around his waist and give everything to this kiss but she let him guide them. Soon, too soon, the kiss ended and he moved back, his eyes dark as they assessed her.

  “This is a very bad idea, Juliette,” he muttered. “I’m not capable of giving much. I don’t want a relationship, and I can’t fall in love.”

  She nodded. She understood, she knew he was hurt and broken, she knew he already thought he had had his lifetime’s quota of love and didn’t deserve anymore. But she didn’t believe him.

  “But I want you,” he said. “I want you so bad it almost fucking hurts. Let me take you out tonight.”

  “Okay.”

  “Just the two of us,” he growled.

  “Okay.”

  Noah nodded, seemingly satisfied for the moment. “I’ll pick you up. Seven.”

  “I’ll be waiting,” she said, her voice barely above a whisper. Her eyes fell back to his lips, and she moistened her own in anticipation of another kiss. Noah groaned.

  “No more,” he said, his voice thick. “You’ve had enough kissing for the moment. Tonight.”

  Juliette’s eyes went wide with surprise, and she pouted a little but didn’t argue. She had a feeling that if they started again they wouldn’t stop, and she needed to remember that they were on his mother’s lawn, where everyone could see them.

  “Tonight?” she whispered hopefully, and her heart lurched when he grinned a slow, sexy grin that promised everything she was hoping for later that night, and more.

  ****

  Juliette had no idea what to wear. Her wardrobe didn’t consist of a lot of options, which made choosing a little bit easier, but she wasn’t sure if she should go with the navy blue floral wraparound dress, or the sexier white sundress with embroidered flowers on the hem. She could ask Bethany, her best friend back in Lexington, but her phone had been switched off since she had reversed out of Harry’s driveway and she wasn’t sure she was ready to turn it on yet.

  Her eyes flittered to the said phone that sat on her bedside table, and she sighed. I guess I eventually must face to the music, she thought wryly as she switched it on and waited as it went through the rebooting process. Immediately it began to ding with messages, both voice and text, plus a myriad of Facebook notifications.

  The first few were, as she suspected, from Harry. He wanted to know where she was, why she’d left, asking her to call him, worrying that she was safe, telling her that her letter told him nothing and that if he’d done something wrong he was sorry. Juliette’s heart clenched a little listening to Harry’s voice. He hadn’t done anything wrong. She’d explained that in her letter. They’d just fallen out of love, if they’d even been in love in the first place.

  From the start, they’d said their relationship, albeit exclusive, wasn’t serious and that they were friends first and foremost. It was the fact that they were friends that had made leaving easier for Juliette. For the last couple of months, they’d been friends who slept next to each other in the same bed. She couldn’t remember the last time they’d been intimate, and it hadn’t seemed to bother either of them.

  In one of the messages Harry told her he was going to the police. He said he was worried she’d been abducted. Juliette knew that wasn’t true. He knew she’d left, and the police would not take him seriously. In another he was angry and in yet another he told her not to bother ever coming back.

  She swiped at a tear in her eye, hating that she’d caused him any type of pain, even though she knew he’d recover soon enough. As soon as he realized she’d done him a favor by leaving him, leaving his world, and not lingering around. They had shared friends, and this way, well, this way they never had to see each other again. No horrible fallout from their breakup.

  There were other messages, too. Bethany had called multiple times and so had a few other friends. There was even a message from a policeman, who sounded bored as he asked her to contact Lexington Police Station as soon as she got the message. So, Harry had gone to the police, but, just as she’d suspected the police hadn’t taken his missing person’s report seriously.

  Hesitating for the briefest moment Juliette dialed Bethany and waited as the phone rang.

  She picked up almost immediately. “Juliette,” Bethany’s familiar voice demanded down the receiver, “where the hell are you?”

  “Hi, Beth,” Juliette replied, keeping her voice soft. “How are you?”

  “How am I?” Bethany shrieked. “How the hell are you? And where are you? Harry is going out of his mind!”

  “I’m fine,” she replied. “You can tell Harry not to worry.”

  “What’s going on?” her friend demanded. “You just up and leave in the middle of the night?”

  “It was early morning actually,” Juliette informed her, not that it made any difference, “and I hate goodbyes.”

  “So, you just leave?”

  “It was time to move on,” she explained. “Things with Harry and me had been over for a long time.”

  “I can’t believe it, you just left. Just like that. Are you coming back?”

  “No.”

  Bethany paused. “Are you okay? I mean are you sick or something?”

  Juliette squeezed her eyes shut. “No. I’m fine. Like I said, it was just time to move on. I really wanted to see the ocean.” Her excuse sounded lame and she knew it, but it was real and honest and the only explanation she had. That was exactly how it had happened. Her and Harry’s relationship had run its course. It was time to move on, and she wanted to see the ocean. Simple as that. Only there was so much more to it.

  “You wanted to see the ocean,” Bethany echoed. “So what, are you in California now or something?

  “Something like that.”

  “And you’re definitely not coming back?”

  “No. Definitely not.” Juliette paused. “I really like my new home. I’m happy.”

  Bethany snorted. “You’re always happy. You’d be happy living out of your car. But, Juliette…”

  “Yes?”

  “Don’t you get lonely?” Bethany asked quietly. “Lonely and tired? All this running, all this searching for … something. Don’t you ever just want to stay in one place and make some kind of connections?”

  “I stayed in Lexington,” Juliette pointed out, “longer than I have ever stayed anywhere before.”

  “You were here a year,” Bethany retorted. “That’s hardly settling down.”

  “Hey.” Juliette glanced down at the two dresses on her bed. “I gotta go. But before I go can I ask a favor?”

  “What is it?” Bethany asked with a heavy sigh.

  “Which one do you think is prettier,” she said, keeping her voice light, “the navy or the white sundress?”

  Bethany gave a little chuckle. “You’re calling to say goodbye and ask fashion advice at the same time?” Juliette could almost imagine Bethany shaking her head on the other end of the line. “The navy. Definitely.”

  Juliette smiled. “Thanks. And bye.”

  “Will you call again?”

  “Do you want me to?” Juliette asked honestly. “I mean really?”

  Bethany hesitated a moment before she replied, her voice decisive, “Sure. I love you, Juliette. You’re one of my best friends.”

  Juliette smiled and promised Bethany she’d call again before she hung up and let out a deep breath. That had been hard, but it would have been harder if she’d said goodbye in
Lexington, if she’d made promises she couldn’t keep. Bethany would be fine, Harry would be fine, and she’d be fine.

  She stared at the dresses before picking up the navy dress and sliding it over her head.

  She had a date to get ready for.

  ****

  “Wow, you look very pretty,” Renee said a little while later when Juliette went to meet her outside. “You get all the grease off?”

  Juliette held out her hands, which she’d scrubbed clean in the shower removing most of the grease stains, but not all. A few stubborn ones remained, and her nails, which were short and stubby, were rimmed with grease as well. She sighed. It was odd how grease stains could make her so happy.

  Renee made a face. “No manicure for you then I take it. Can’t you wear gloves?”

  “I think Toby will laugh at me if I do,” she sat down into one of the porch chairs, gazing out over the ocean, “and I don’t think it’s very practical in a workshop.”

  Renee nodded as if it made perfect sense, turning to look out over the ocean. “So, you out tonight?”

  Juliette snapped her eyes to Renee wondering if she was being discreet. “I have a date with Noah,” she informed her and watched as Renee’s eyebrows shot up again to her hairline and her eyes swung back to lock with Juliette’s.

  “A date?” she echoed, “with Noah? My Noah?”

  Juliette nodded, suddenly feeling the weight of Renee’s disapproval. “Do you mind?”

  Renee stared at her, and it was a while before she replied. “Do I mind? No. Of course, I don’t mind. You and Noah are adults. You can date who you please.”

  “But…” Juliette prompted, sensing there was something more.

  “But…” Renee swallowed, and looked back at the ocean. “But Noah hasn’t dated. I mean, not for a long time.”

  Juliette nodded. “I thought as much.”

  “He lost someone,” Renee explained. “I probably should leave it to him to tell you, but I’m not sure he will. He never talks about it, never talks about her.”

  Juliette watched Renee, not speaking, as she waited for her continue. How much had this man been through? She wondered.

  “But I’m not sure it’s fair to you,” Renee said, looking back over at Juliette. “As much as I love Noah and want to see him happy again, I’m starting to think it’s not possible.”

  “Hey.” Juliette reached over and held Renee’s hand, giving it a gentle squeeze. “I don’t believe that. I think we make our own happiness, we make our own choices, and I think Noah just needs a gentle push to realize how happy he can be again.”

  Renee stared at her for a long moment. “Where did you come from?” she asked, speaking almost to herself as her eyes swept over Juliette’s face.

  Juliette shrugged. “Lexington.”

  Renee laughed. “Well thank God for Lexington.”

  The rumble of a truck out the front alerted Juliette to Noah’s arrival. Jumping to her feet she ran a hand over her dress, smoothing out imaginary wrinkles. “Do I look okay?”

  Renee smiled, her eyes warming and crinkles appearing at the edges. “You look beautiful. Now go and remind my son what it’s like to be alive again.”

  Chapter Nine

  Noah

  Noah drove Juliette to a restaurant down near the jetty. Betty Blue’s was an intimate spot that served delicious food and a place where he’d have her all to himself. But, as the waitress led them to his pre-booked table in the corner, he wondered if he would’ve been better taking her to his house and cooking for her himself. That way he could watch her without worrying about embarrassing himself in public, plus his place included his massive king sized bed.

  “This is so pretty,” Juliette cried, twisting and turning to examine every part of the restaurant including the view of the pier and the ocean.

  Noah glanced around as if seeing it for the first time when he’d been here countless times over the years. “Yeah, they do great food as well.”

  Juliette opened the menu, examining it. “What do you recommend?”

  “If you like seafood then I recommend the lobster pasta.”

  She shut her menu. “Lobster it is. I’ve never had lobster, but I’m sure it’s delicious.”

  Noah shook his head, his mouth twitching. Of course she would like lobster. Even if it tasted like dirt he was sure she’d find something good to say about it.

  “So,” he began, pouring her some wine from the bottle he’d ordered, “first day of work. How was it?”

  She beamed. “It was great! Toby really knows his stuff and is a great instructor.”

  “Yeah. He’s great.”

  “He is a great guy,” she gushed. “He was really patient with me, explaining everything and going slow so I could follow along. He’s good with the customers, too. He gave Mrs. Peters a huge discount on her car because he said she had things tough since her husband left. I don’t think he ended up making any money once he’d paid for the parts.”

  Noah’s throat tightened. “Yeah,” he repeated, “he’s great.”

  Juliette tilted her head and regarded him, obviously picking up on his prickly jealousy he was struggling to hide. “Anyhow, today was good. How was your day?”

  He shrugged. “Okay. I made Ryan clean out my workshop, you know, as compensation.”

  She laughed, the sound light and lilting and doing things to make his chest contract and his pants tighten. “You didn’t have to do that. Once I got over the shock—I mean it’s not every day you get your photo taken in the shower—I could see the funny side. I guess it’s lucky it was me he came across and not you.”

  “How so?”

  “If it was you, he’d have your picture up on social media,” she told him through her giggles, her eyes lighting. “You would be viral.”

  Noah’s mouth twitched. “I hardly think so.”

  Juliette nodded. “Oh yeah. All the girls would have shared it. You would have broken the internet.”

  “Well he’ll keep,” Noah told her. “I’ll get him back.”

  She leaned forward, resting her head on her hands as she smiled up at him. “Really! Please let me in on it.”

  “Sure thing,” he promised. “You’ll be the first to know.”

  The waitress arrived and took their order, her eyes flicking between Noah and Juliette curiously. Noah, smiling tightly at the girl who’d gone to school with Ryan, introduced her to Juliette, explaining that she was currently living with his mother.

  As soon as the waitress left Juliette leaned forward again. “That’s another thing. I can’t stay with your mother forever. I need to find a place to rent.”

  Noah shrugged. “My mother’s not charging you much, is she? Why do you need to move?”

  “Well as much as I love it there I think she is undercharging me, which isn’t really fair,” Juliette said. “And whilst I would love to wake up with views of the sun rising on the ocean every day I don’t think I should take advantage of her hospitality. I don’t want to be rude.”

  Noah arched an eyebrow at her. “I don’t think anyone could ever think you were rude.”

  “Well, I still need to find my own place.” She looked up at him. “Do you know anyone looking for a roommate at all?”

  Me. The sudden and unbidden thought appeared in his mind, and he choked on his wine. No! He most definitely wasn’t looking for a roommate. He was more than happy living in his house, a short drive from his workshop at his mother’s, all by himself. Well, technically he wasn’t by himself as he had his dog, Loop, there as well. Loop gave him as much company as he needed these days. As much company as he could handle. Juliette … as much as he wanted to get her in his bed, he did not need her living in his house.

  “I’ll keep my ears open,” he mumbled when he’d recovered from his coughing fit, “and let you know if I hear of anything.”

  Juliette smiled and sipped her wine.

  “So,” Noah began after a moment, “tell me again why you left Lexington?”

>   “I needed a change.”

  “No boyfriend back there?” He really, really hoped there wasn’t a boyfriend back there.

  “We broke up,” she told him honestly, “and I didn’t want to hang around. You know how it gets awkward. It was just better if I left.”

  “And he just let you?” Noah asked with amazement. “He didn’t fight for you or anything?” He could hardly conceive that someone wouldn’t fight tooth and nail to hold on to Juliette. He might not be capable, but he could imagine she inspired love from any guy who laid eyes on her. Any guy that wasn’t damaged like he was.

  “Well.” She hesitated. “It wasn’t really open for discussion. It wasn’t really a case of letting me.”

  Noah nodded. “Of course. And you didn’t think of heading home, after Lexington?”

  “Home?”

  “Yeah.” He frowned. “Home. To your mom’s in Pittsburgh.”

  Juliette stared at him like he was speaking a different language. Swallowing, she took her time taking a sip of her wine, letting her eyes roam around the restaurant before she came back to him, speaking slowly. “I already told you about my mom. We aren’t close.”

  “How come?” he asked. “I’m curious. Most of the girls I know, yeah they have an up and down relationship with their moms, but they would never go eighteen months without speaking.”

  “I’m not most girls.”

  “I already know that.”

  Juliette bit her lip, and if he wasn’t so curious about her, wanting to know everything there was to know about her, Noah would have let it go. But she intrigued him too much. She was like a puzzle he needed to solve, and the clues were in her past he was sure of it.

  “Well,” she said eventually, “my mom and I haven’t lived together since I was ten. That was when she moved in with her boyfriend.”

  “And she didn’t take you?” he asked with surprise.

  “No. He didn’t want any kids.”