“People in love are usually pretty agreeable,” John smiled. “Surely you can come to an understanding.”
Grier shrugged his shoulders. “I don’t know about that. She hasn’t been on her best behavior.”
“Unfortunately, she is the boy’s mother and has absolute control at this time. You’ll have to get her to agree amicably or resort to a court order. At that time, a judge will decide if you have a valid case, and even on the off chance that you can prove Luca is yours, the judge will do what’s best for the child. You are single and gay—two factors that shouldn’t matter, given everything else you’ve done for Luca, but you have to be prepared that this might subconsciously influence the judge’s decision.”
“That is bullshit!”
“I agree, but it’s a reality that same-sex couples face every day. Jillian is planning to marry and provide a traditional two-parent home, which tips the scales in her favor.”
“So there’s nothing I can do?”
“I didn’t say that, Grier. I’m just saying that it would be in your best interest to settle this out of court.”
Grier stood abruptly and reached to shake John’s hand. “Thank you for your time.”
“I wish you the best of luck.”
“Apparently, I’m going to need it.”
Grier was silent afterward, and Lil predicted the evening would go south if he didn’t do something to take his lover’s mind off John’s forthright evaluation. Grier would have plenty of time to ponder his next move, but right now, Lil wanted to get his focus back to where they were an hour ago―leather and lace. “Let’s go and have a drink.”
“I could use several,” Grier admitted.
“Come here, love,” Lil said softly. Grier moved closer and allowed himself to be embraced, visibly relaxing against Lil’s torso. “We’ll figure this out together, okay?”
“You think there’s hope?”
“Your track record with Luca can’t be denied. Even Jillian’s parents will admit that you’ve been a reliable and caring sitter.”
“I love him so much, Lil. The possibility of having him grow up thinking he was abandoned by his father is killing me.”
“It’s not going to happen. You have to be optimistic.”
Grier sighed deeply, comforted by Lil’s confidence. “What cologne are you wearing?”
“The One Gentleman by D & G.”
“You smell so good.”
“I’m glad you approve.” Lil lifted Grier’s face and stared into his troubled eyes. “Try not to worry too much. We’ll tackle this together.”
“Why would you even want to jump into such muddy waters?”
Because I love you. “My two favorite people happen to be neck-deep in the muck.”
Grier mumbled a thank you and huddled closer, comforted by Lil’s reply. “What was that about a drink?”
“I’m going to put my fears aside and take you to the top of the Hyatt.”
“That sounds great.”
“The view is fabulous and the frozen Daiquiris are to die for.”
“Lead the way.”
GRIER’S EYES lit up when they walked through the seventeen-story atrium of the Hyatt Regency. Lil pointed out the architectural details of the imposing lobby that had become a trademark for many of the Hyatts throughout the nation. The glass elevator whisked them up to the Regency Club Lounge, a choice locale reserved for hotel guests and their companions. Lil was a loyal Hyatt customer, a friend of the manager, and had access to most of the amenities of the four-star hotel. The view of the San Francisco Bay was inspiring, and Grier felt himself relaxing after two strong cocktails. Lil nursed his Daiquiri, since he had to drive them home, and chattered about the different points of interest that were visible from their perch high up in the sky.
“I’d like to tour Alcatraz.”
“We can take a ferry and tour the entire area,” Lil assured Grier, “including the rock. If we get off on the Vallejo side, we can catch a bus tour to Napa Valley and go wine tasting.”
“I’ll go wherever you lead me,” Grier said candidly. Lil could read whatever he wanted in that statement, but Grier knew that his feelings for the attractive blond had grown and taken root. It wasn’t just the sex, although that part of their relationship was more than special. It was outstanding. Lil’s positive attitude had infused him with a confidence that had been shaken by Jillian’s recent actions, and he was determined to set his life on the right path, even if it meant breaking his silence after seven years. Granted, it wouldn’t be easy, and both families would be shocked, and most likely disappointed, but he hoped that their unified love for Luca would make up for his and Jillian’s deceit. Grier knew he had the most to gain, but he could also lose it all if the Garcias decided to play rough.
“Are you ready to go?” Lil interrupted his thoughts with a gentle nudge.
“Sure.” He reached for his wallet and was relieved when Lil didn’t protest but smiled at him instead and said, “Thank you.”
“You’re welcome.”
WHEN THEY got to the car and buckled in, Lil decided to take the scenic route home, so Grier could see more of the city. He drove down the Embarcadero toward Fisherman’s Wharf and turned left on Bay Street heading to Ghirardelli Square. The car crawled through the stop-and-go traffic, impeded by the horde of tourists that mobbed the popular destination. Although it was already six in the evening, it was still light out, being early August, and warm, the perfect combination to keep the streets filled with pedestrians.
“Do you want me to park somewhere so we can walk around?” Lil asked.
“No, this is fine.” Grier was enjoying the ride but had no desire to mingle with the crowd. He was far too comfortable in the cushy leather seat and starting to get horny as the prospect of opening up the packages of lingerie loomed closer.
“I’m going to drive up Hyde Street so we can come down Lombard.”
“What’s Lombard?”
“Didn’t you want to see the twisty road that’s featured in the movies?”
“Yeah,” Grier exclaimed. “Is it close?”
“Very,” Lil smiled. They got to the top of Hyde and turned onto Lombard, and just as the street began its descent in a series of sharp turns, Grier sat up straight and whistled in admiration.
“I’d love to drive my bike through this.”
“Fortunately,” Lil said, “the speed limit is five miles an hour.”
“You’re no fun at all,” Grier teased. “Why do the movies always depict wild car chases through these twists and turns?”
“Makes for good cinema.”
The flowerbeds in between each curve were blooming with pink and blue hydrangeas while the red bricks that paved the crooked section of the road added more color, turning the entire area into a postcard.
“This is really awesome,” Grier exclaimed, as Lil navigated the Mercedes carefully.
“It’s a pain in the ass to drive,” Lil pointed out, glancing in Grier’s direction, “but worth it to see your pretty smile.”
The brunet leaned over and kissed him on the cheek. “Thank you,” he whispered.
“Let’s head on home.” Lil could sense that his lover was gearing up for what he hoped would be a night to remember. The vision of Grier in his new finery was giving him a raging hard-on, and he shifted in his seat. He noticed that Grier had adjusted himself as well, and he was inordinately pleased that they were clearly on the same page. It remained a mystery as to how two such diverse individuals could be so compatible, but he wasn’t about to refuse the gift he’d been lucky enough to receive by whomever was in charge of slinging cupid’s arrow. He would much rather bask in the joy of these new feelings than doubt they existed.
The lights flashed on as soon as they unlocked the door, and the motion detectors picked up their vibrations. Lil adjusted the dimmers and left the room in relative darkness, adding a little atmosphere to the highly charged moment. He turned on the state-of-the-art sound system, and the room w
as flooded with the warm and sultry voice of Michael Bublé crooning “Everything.”
“Give me a minute,” Grier said softly, grabbing the bags from Alla Prima.
“Hurry, love,” Lil urged, kissing Grier fiercely before letting him go.
Lil moved to the bar in the living room and poured himself a small shot of vodka, preparing himself for what was to come. Grier opened the bedroom door just as the next song on the playlist kicked on. The words of Michael’s song “Can’t Help Falling in Love” reverberated in Lil’s ears, almost conspiring against him as he watched the man clad in the black leather vest saunter toward him. He was devastatingly beautiful in the dark red boy briefs underneath the black garter belt that held up the ivory silk stockings. Lil burned with a need that was so intense it left him breathless. Grier smiled shyly, having no idea what effect he had on Lil, but he continued his forward motion until they stood face to face. He lifted his mouth to receive the kiss that sent Lil catapulting into the wildly erotic journey which had previously only taken place in the deep recesses of his mind.
“You’re a dream.” Lil spoke reverently as he ran both hands up and down Grier’s firm biceps. He parted the soft leather to expose more of the lightly furred chest that felt like silk under his trembling fingers. “Grier,” he whispered, “you’re beautiful.”
“Lil,” Grier moaned and leaned into his touch. “Kiss me again.”
They came together, twining tongues and mingling tastes, a sweet mix of heat and tenderness that touched Lil to the core, stripping him of all pretenses. He knew it was too soon, and there was the risk of scaring Grier by putting more pressure on him, but he couldn’t contain his feelings any longer. He stepped back and held Grier at arm’s length, staring into the stormy eyes that gazed at him so trustingly, and he felt certain that his feelings would be reciprocated. “I love you,” Lil whispered throatily.
Grier responded with a bruising kiss, putting Lil’s mind to rest. “Let’s go to bed,” Grier suggested, guiding Lil toward the bedroom.
THEIR WORLD narrowed to whispers in the dark, silky fabric caressing tumescent organs already slippery with precum, and always, the never-ending kisses that only heightened the impassioned words tumbling unguarded. “Love you,” Lil breathed over and over, as he worshiped every part of Grier’s body. He turned him over gently and peeled off the fabric that slid down the bunched-up muscles, leaving the light layer of dark hair crackling from the static caused by the thigh-high stockings. Lil buried his face in the smooth flesh of Grier’s inner thighs, flattening his tongue against the tender skin that puckered around his anus, encouraged when Grier parted his legs and got on his knees to give Lil all the access he needed. The background music had changed again, and the deep voice of Josh Groban singing one of Lil’s favorite songs, “Awake,” was a poignant reminder that only time would tell if he and Grier could stay like this forever. Tomorrow would come soon enough, and with it, all the decisions that might end up tearing them apart.
Lil pulled open the drawer on the nightstand and reached for everything he needed to prepare himself to possess this man who’d turned his world upside down in such a short time. When he was ready, he nudged Grier, only to feel him push back while simultaneously grabbing Lil’s hips and pulling him forward until his cock was engulfed deep within the confines of Grier’s welcoming body. Lil held his breath as the pleasure ricocheted throughout every nerve ending, savoring each pulsing moment while Grier urged him on. Lil angled himself for maximum effect, and he began the timeless dance, joined by his lover whose every backward thrust met his forward motion with the timed precision of a fine Swiss watch. They were more than in sync; they were a perfect match. Soon the movements became more frantic, and their cries of satisfaction filled the room, drowning out the music.
“Love you,” Lil said softly, pressing more kisses against Grier’s neck. They were both covered with a light sheen of perspiration from their efforts, and the smell of sex permeated the room, but it was the sweetest aroma in the world, in Lil’s opinion, and one he’d miss when Grier left to go back to Chicago. The reality of his imminent departure put a damper on Lil’s happiness, and Grier must have sensed the sudden change in mood.
“Can we turn over?”
“Sure.” Lil withdrew and tossed the condom into the wastebasket, while Grier flipped over and eventually ended up lying against Lil’s chest.
“That was incredible,” Grier said.
“We’re good together.”
“I wish circumstances were different.”
“It is what it is, love. I didn’t go into this with blinders.”
Lil’s words were pragmatic, meant to take the pressure off Grier, but he’d hoped to hear the words, and they weren’t forthcoming
“You know I’d move here in a minute if it weren’t for Luca.”
“I know, love.”
“How am I going to survive without you?”
“Why don’t we postpone this awful conversation until Friday? I can’t deal with it twice.”
“Okay.”
They fell asleep in each other’s arms, choosing to escape into dreams rather than face the inevitable. They made love two more times before dawn, and each moment was deeply satisfying, but Grier remained silent, never saying the words that would have meant so much to Lil. It would have eased his mind, and he felt a little foolish for blurting out his feelings. He should have known better than to expect Grier to declare his love when he was so obviously reluctant to make any sort of commitment. In the back of his mind, Lil had known how this would play out as soon as he found out about Luca. The boy would always come first and rightly so. He was willing to accept his role as second in Grier’s life, if only Grier would reassure him. Yes, he was a generous and thoughtful lover, always striving to give Lil as much pleasure as he received, but there was a part of Grier that was guarded, and it was this barrier that Lil wanted to break down. Maybe then Grier would be open to the possibility of another life and one that included him.
GRIER WOKE to the sound of a phone ringing, and he reached for his cell, which he’d left on the nightstand.
“Hello.”
“Tito?”
“Hey, buddy. What’s going on?”
“When are you coming home?”
“In three days.”
“Three?”
“Are you okay, Luca?”
“No.”
“What’s wrong?”
“Mommy and Tito A are going to get married, and he’th going to be my daddy. I don’t want him to be my daddy, Tito G.” Luca was breathless, stumbling over his words and whining pitifully. “Can’t you marry my mommy, pleath?”
Oh God. “I don’t love your mommy that way, Luca.”
“But you love me, right?”
“Yes, very much. Where are you?”
“In the garage with Bianca.”
“Why is she in the garage?”
“Tito A thed her litter box wath yucky.”
The fucker! “Haven’t you been cleaning it every day?”
“Yeth.”
“Then I don’t understand why it smells.”
Luca started to cry. “He’th not nith like you or Tito Lil.”
No, he’s not, Grier admitted to himself. Ali was always so fastidious, almost neurotic about cleanliness and order. He could easily picture his brother losing it over a kitten, or a child’s mess, for that matter. What the hell was Jillian thinking? Didn’t she see what was going on, or was she so intent on marrying a Dilorio she’d overlooked the obvious? Ali was the ultimate metrosexual and clearly not stepfather material, not now or evermore.
“Luca, you need to stop crying. I’ll be home soon, and I’ll talk to your mommy about Bianca. I’ll fix this.”
“Before he’th my daddy?”
“Way before.”
“Before Thaturday?”
“Why?”
“We’re going to the church on that day.”
What the hell? “Listen, buddy. I need to han
g up now, but I want you to call me again tomorrow, okay?”
“Okay.”
“I love you, Luca.”
“Me too,” he sniffled. “Much.”
Grier disconnected and tossed the phone over the side of the bed. “Motherfucker!”
“What’s wrong?” Lil said. “Is there a problem?”
“My fucking brother is being a dick about the kitten.”
“How?”
Grier recounted Luca’s story while Lil listened sympathetically. “He’s a prick, and poor Luca doesn’t know how to deal with him,” Grier concluded.
“Why doesn’t he tell Jillian?”
“I have no idea. Maybe she agrees with Ali.”
“Poor kid.”
Lil sat up and pulled Grier into his arms. “Speaking of cats….”
“You forgot yours,” Grier finished the sentence.
“Uh-huh.”
“Hopefully, he’ll understand.”
“I was a little preoccupied,” Lil rationalized.
They kissed and when they pulled apart, Grier asked, “Can I put you in my duffel and bring you back to Illinois?”
“Would you if you could?”
“Hell yes.”
“Seriously?”
“I’ve obviously failed to show you how much I care.”
“It’d be nice to hear it.”
“I do care, Lil. Very, very much.”
“Good to know,” Lil said breezily.
“Are you pissed?”
“Not at all.” Lil didn’t give Grier any time to react to his curt reply. He headed for the bathroom, relieved himself, flushed, and stepped into the shower stall, turning on the hot water full blast. He knew he was being touchy, but he couldn’t help himself. It had been years since he’d openly voiced his love for anyone, and he was more than ready to make the leap into a committed relationship, yet the stubborn man in his bed was not. Or if he was, he didn’t know it―just as bad.
Dreamspinner Press Year Four Greatest Hits Page 149
