Breathe Into Me

by Nikki Drost

  “I’ve got to warn you son, the moment you tell her she’s going to run. It’s just what she does. The second things get too real she pushes people away. It has to do with her parent’s deaths.” Gary tosses back his shot and continues. “I think she’s afraid that if she allows herself love someone, they’ll hurt her or leave her. Just like John and Caroline did.”

  I pour him another shot.

  “She hasn’t mentioned what happened to them. All you told me was that they died when she was young.”

  Gary runs his hand through his dark hair. “I should probably let her tell you, but maybe the insight will help. Caroline was a nurse at a drug rehabilitation clinic in Vermont. A male patient had become infatuated with her and stalked her for months. The cops couldn’t do anything because he never threatened her outright. John had finally snapped when the guy accosted her in front of Andy’s school. John tracked him down and beat the shit out of him. He thought it was over when the flowers and love letters stopped coming to the house, but he was wrong.” Gary takes another shot and runs his hand over his beard. “John didn’t show up at work and he wasn’t answering his phone, so I went to make sure everything was alright. When I saw that the front door was wide open, I knew something was wrong. There was a body lying in a pool of blood in the living room, a 9mm was still in the man’s hand. I recognized him right away and started screaming for, John. I found my best friend, the man who was like my brother, shot dead on his bedroom floor next to his wife. I ran to Andy’s room terrified at what I’d find, but by the grace of god, I found her curled into a ball in the back of her closet. She was so traumatized she didn’t speak for six months and to this day she still has nightmares.”

  I forgo the shot glass and take a huge drink from the bottle. “Jesus Gary, I’m sorry.” Sorry doesn’t begin to cover it, but I’m at a loss for words. Now I understand why Andy asked if anything strange had happened, she must have worried that I had witnessed her nightmare.

  “Don’t be sorry, son. Just don’t let history repeat itself. John thought his badass reputation was enough to keep his family safe. As you can see, it wasn’t. I know your world is dangerous and I know you have countless enemies who would use her to get to you. I know Andy is an adult, but in a lot of ways she is still that scared seven-year-old girl. Just promise me that you’ll do everything in your power to keep her safe and I’ll help smooth things over once she knows the truth.”

  It takes me a moment to register what he’s saying to me. “You’re going to help me? I thought for sure you’d tell me to stay away from her.”

  Gary stands and slaps me on my shoulder. “I’m not going to pretend to understand this whole mate business, but I know what kind of man you are. You’ll love her until the day you die, I can’t ask for anything more.” He extends his hand and I gladly take it.

  “Thank you Gary, I’ll protect her with my life.”

  He chuckles as he pulls me in for a hug. “Welcome to the family, kid.”

  ***

  After Gary had left, I went outside to think. Fresh air has always had a way of calming me down. I can’t believe Andy lost her parents like that. I never would have guessed she had lived through something so tragic. She appears to be so well rounded and adjusted. My respect for Gary has gone up several notches.

  “I’m sorry.”

  I turn my head to find Jamie staring out toward the lake.

  “What do you have to be sorry for?” I don’t think I’ve ever heard him apologize for anything. It’s not in his nature to admit when he’s wrong.

  “I shouldn’t have given you shit about, Andy. You’re my brother. I should have had your back.”

  Ah, he must have overheard mine and Gary’s conversation. No doubt, the others did too.

  “You were right about me being distracted. We had three bodies dropped on our doorstep last night. I should be getting ready to go hunting, but all I can think about is going to the hospital to see, Andy.”

  After hearing about her parent’s murders, I just want to hold her and never let her go. He lights up a smoke and moves away from the door.

  “Look you know I’m not good with all this emotional shit right?”

  That’s a fucking understatement. James only does two emotions: rage, and humor, with nothing in between.

  “What’s going on, Jamie?”

  His dark eyes met mine, tiny flecks of crimson dot his eyes. He’s fighting to keep his power at bay.

  “I heard what Gary and you were talking about. The way he felt about Andy’s dad is how I feel about you. I know we’re not blood, but that shit doesn’t matter to me. I’d lose it if something happened to you.”

  I’m taken back by his admission. I knew he cared about me, even though he’s never said the words. “James I…”

  He holds up his hand to stop me. “Don’t tell me nothing will go wrong. We both know shit happens. Just watch your ass when you’re out there okay.”

  I nod because words have escaped me.

  “Good, now enough of the touchy feely crap, you have a girl to win over and this is what you’re going to do.”

  Chapter 6

  “Ten more minutes until my break.”

  Tonight has been extremely busy. We’ve had a car accident, two stab wounds, several OD’s, and one heart attack, and it’s not even seven o’ clock yet.

  “I’d swear it was a full moon tonight.”

  I look over the chart I’ve been updating to see Sue Billings our resident MD. “It has been crazy tonight,” I agree.

  Of course, once things calm down, my mind goes straight to thoughts of, Adam. His behavior last night was suspicious at best. Of course, I became more curious when Kelsey and Henry came home and told me about the dead bodies in the parking lot. I can’t believe three people were killed by wild animals. It’s such a tragedy. But his strange behavior had to be a coincidence, right? I mean there is no way he could have known that they were there.

  “Why are we always busy on Mondays? They’re bad enough without having back to back stabbings.”

  I roll my eyes at Vanessa Clark, one of the many nurses working tonight. “It could be worse, Nessa.” I finish Mr. Haskins chart and place it with the others. The man weighs close to four hundred pounds, eats nothing, but junk food, and then seems surprised when he’s brought in with symptoms of a heart attack. The man was lucky we were able to stop it from escalating.

  “Yeah, but you didn’t have to deal with the last pin cushion. The guy kept trying to feel my ass while I was suturing his leg.”

  “Did you get his number?” Evan Mcquade our lingering paramedic asks.

  “No, Evan, he was old and scruffy. Why couldn’t he have been young rich billionaire? Not only would I have let him feel me up, but I would’ve also given him a free sponge bath.”

  I shake my head in mock disgust. Vanessa is fresh out of nursing school and has been on a desperate search for a rich husband. With her model thin body and perfect features, I doubt she’ll have a long wait.

  “The man you’re talking about was thirty-five, that’s not old. And I’m not even going to comment on the sponge bath.” Images of me giving Adam a bath with my tongue flood my mind. Ugh, I have to stop thinking like that, but after his promises of pleasure last night, my mind has been stuck in the gutter. I blame him for every one of my slutty thoughts and man is he going to pay for it, preferably with orgasms.

  “Speaking of hot, I call dibs.” Vanessa quickly begins fluffing her short blonde bob.

  I turn around and there he is, the man who’s made me blush more times in one night than my entire life. Damn he looks good. He’s wearing black Chuck Taylor’s, khaki cargo shorts that leave little to the imagination and a white wifebeater that’s so snug every muscle in his upper body is visible.

  “What are you doing here?” I ask as I move to stand in front of him. He licks his lips and gives me a sexy smile.

  “I was going to take you to dinner, but now that I’ve seen how cute you are in your scr
ubs, I think I may have an ailment. You should probably take me behind one of those curtains and give me a full body exam, preferably a naked one.”

  I can feel the heat searing my face. I begin to wonder if this man’s words will always affect me like this. I can feel my coworker’s eyes on us. I need to defuse this situation before our display attracts even more attention. “Dinner it is.”

  Adam holds his hand out for me to take. Our fingers entwine and that familiar heat soars through my veins.

  “Do you have any brothers?” Vanessa calls out to us.

  “I have more than I can count.” He chuckles over his shoulder. I have a feeling Nessa is going to want an introduction.

  ***

  Ten minutes later, I’m sitting on a plush gingham blanket in a secluded section of the park across the street from the hospital. The night air is warm, but there’s a gentle breeze. The aroma of flowers and freshly cut grass permeate my nose, causing me instantly to relax. The deep onyx sky is brightly filled with stars and the moon is so bright and nearly full.

  I turn my attention back to the man next to me. Adam has out done himself. Our picnic dinner consists of Caprese Panini’s, almonds, fresh cut fruit, assorted cubed cheeses, asparagus spears, Italian pasta salad, and sparkling water. Not to mention the candles and the soft music that’s playing from his iPod.

  “You really thought of everything didn’t you?” I chuckle.

  Adam lies on his side supporting his weight with his well-defined arm. “I wanted everything to be perfect for you.”

  This man is too good to be true. In the short time that I’ve known him, I’ve come to realize that he has a master’s degree in seduction.

  “So you don’t do this with every girl you want to sleep with?” I’m not sure I really want to know the answer. I can’t blame him if he does, but part of me wants this to be a special gesture just for me.

  “Truthfully, no I don’t usually go all out for a woman.”

  His answer warms me to my soul.

  “Listen, Andy, I’m going to be completely honest with you.”

  Here it comes, the moment of truth. I’m either going to hear something horrible about his past or he’s going to reveal some horrendous flaw. I brace myself for disappointment.

  “I like you a lot and I want us to be together. I know we just met and there is a lot that we don’t know about each other, but this feels right, you feel right. Please give me a chance to make you happy.”

  His words take me by surprise, not because we’ve only known each other for two days, but he’s right. Whatever this is does feel right. I suddenly feel like I’m in a fairy tale and prince charming has just declared his eternal love for me. It’s every girl’s fantasy. How can I possible say no to this man? He makes me forget my insecurities and past relationship failures. He’s been nothing, but open and honest with me and that’s the most important thing right?

  “Please, angel, say you’ll be mine.”

  I can feel tears forming behind my eyes. His honey- colored eyes meet mine and it’s as if he’s trying to stare into my soul. I place my hand over his cheek. He’s ever present whiskers tickle my palm. My mind quickly tries to think of reasons to say no, anything to prevent the inevitable heartbreak I will surely suffer. But I can’t, there isn’t one reason not to be with this man.

  “Yes, I’ll be your girlfriend.” I know I should return his sweet words, but I can’t seem to form any.

  His hand wraps around the back of my neck as he pulls me down for a kiss. His thumb slides over the angle of my jaw in a slow caress. “You have no idea how happy you’ve just made me.”

  I wait for the rational part of me that always screams at me to run to rear its ugly head, but for once in my life, it’s silent. I decide right then and there to trust Adam Stone with my heart.

  “I hope you saved room for dessert.”

  ***

  “You are one hell of a lucky girl. I am so jealous.” Nessa hasn’t stopped gushing over my new boyfriend since my return.

  I have to admit I haven’t been able to stop smiling. After we decided to try a relationship, Adam had hand fed me the most scrumptious chocolate cake I’d ever had. Of course, he “accidently” spread frosting in a few choice places. I can still feel his tongue on the side of my neck. That boy is exceptionally naughty. My thoughts are halted by the sound of sirens. It sounds like Evan has more patients for us. I grab a pair of gloves and focus on the job.

  I am so glad this night is over. The last half of my shift was insane. There had been a major crash on I91. It was like a war zone, multiple head injuries, broken bones and lacerations, several patients needed surgery. All I want to do now is go home and soak in a warm bubble bath with a full glass of wine. My alarm beeps to life as I approach my white Jeep liberty.

  “Look who’s all alone.”

  Startled, I spin around and stare at the drunken man from The Boonies. Shit, what are the chances I’d run into this jerk again.

  “What’s the matter, sweetheart? Did I scare you?” He takes a step forward as I take a step back.

  I realize I’m now trapped between him and my vehicle. Great now what?

  “What are you doing here?” I hope that my fear isn’t evident in my voice. This man’s vibe is menacing to say the very least. He not only has several inches on me, but he outweighs me by at least seventy pounds. I scan the parking lot searching for someone, anyone. I am of course very much alone.

  “Looking for someone, your boyfriend maybe?”

  I square my shoulders and try to seem unaffected. Gary taught me how to defend myself for just this reason. “I don’t need my boyfriend to kick your ass. Now I asked you why you’re here. What do you want?” I hope like hell my tough girl act doesn’t get me into trouble, but I have to let him know that I won’t be bullied by him. He flashes me a sinister smile and runs a hand through his dark golden hair. He inhales deeply and has a look of pure ecstasy on his face.

  “I love the smell of fear. It makes my cock extremely hard.”

  I visibly cringe at his crude words.

  “But there is no time for fun tonight. I have a message for your boyfriend.”

  I can only imagine the things that this man would consider fun. He leans his body closer to mine and places his hands on either side of my head effectively evading my personal space.

  “Tell him to leave town and take his Enforcers with him or things will get bloody.”

  I swallow the lump of fear that’s caught in my throat. He’s so close I can smell alcohol and the stench of cigarettes on his breath. I nod my head too terrified to speak.

  “That’s a good girl.” His hand moves to caress my cheek and I quickly turn away from his touch.

  “I’ll be seeing you around, gorgeous.”

  I watch as he turns and struts away as if he hasn’t a care in the world, as if he didn’t just threaten Adam’s life. I don’t physically relax until he’s out of site. I quickly enter my jeep and lock the doors.

  “What the fuck was that?” I take a few deep breaths to calm my frazzled nerves. “And what the hell is an Enforcer?” Maybe it’s just a fancy word for bounty hunter. It doesn’t really matter, I need to find Adam and tell him what happened. I begin to steer my car toward Westhaven, but the closer I get to his cabin I start to wonder if I should tell him. I remember how he acted when that guy asked me to dance. It turned into an all-out brawl. What would Adam do if he found out about this? He could get arrested or worse get seriously hurt. No, I need to let this go. There is no need to upset him for no reason. With that settled I decide to go home, there’s a bottle of wine with my name on it.

  ***

  The next night at work was filled with the normal ER traffic, a few walk-ins with minor injuries or illnesses. So far, nothing major has happened and I couldn’t be more thankful. After being accosted in the parking lot last night, I went home and tried to relax. I had my bath and some wine, okay half the bottle. When those things failed to relax me, I tried watchin
g TV, but at that late hour, the only shows that were on were about bored housewives or racy skin flicks. I eventually popped in a random movie and finished off the wine. I didn’t discuss what happened last night with Kelsey or Henry. I decided to let the incident go. I glance at the clock. He should be here any minute. Adam said he had to work tonight, but wanted to see me on my break. I can’t wait to thank him for my surprise. When I had woken up, I was greeted by several bouquets of flowers. I received everything from roses to daisies. He had written the sweetest message to me. It was a paragraph from a poem called the “Wondrous Moment of our Meeting” by Alexander Pushkin. He’s promised to give me another paragraph when he gets here. He said this way I’ll have to see him five more times to hear the whole poem. As if, I didn’t want to see him anyway.

  “Hubba, hubba.”

  Nessa’s voice brings me out of my reverie. One glance toward the door and I couldn’t agree more. That man gets sexier every time I see him and this time he’s not alone.

  “Good evening, ladies.” Lincoln flashes his dimpled smile and Nessa practically falls out of her chair, poor girl.

  Adam pulls me into his arms and gives me a quick kiss. “I’m sorry that I can’t stay long, angel, but I brought you dinner and I have the next paragraph of your poem.”

  “You didn’t have to do that. I could have grabbed something from the cafeteria.”

  He places an insulated cooler bag on the top of the nurse’s station.

  “Andy, you’re my girl, it’s my job to take care of you, and that means making sure you eat a decent meal.”

  My heart melts from his tender words. Can this man get any sweeter? Adam leans in close pressing his nose into my hair.

  “Your scent does things to me that you can’t even imagine.”