Walking Dick

by Candi Heart

  A strange, choked laugh ripped out of my body, but then I froze once more, suddenly not certain whether or not a chuckle was appropriate, given the fact that we didn’t really know each other and I looked like something that had crawled out of the same swamp where his girlfriend got the recipe for her smoothies.

  “I-I guess I’m trespassing,” I blurted, trying to salvage some shred of my dignity. “I hopped the fence into your yard, so...”

  His eyebrows lifted a fraction of an inch, and he nodded slowly. “Yes, it appears you did.”

  Chapter 10

  IF HE THOUGHT IT WAS bad, creepy, or just plain strange, he didn’t say so; instead, he just stood there, staring at me, completely oblivious to the effect of his half-nakedness on the rest of the world.

  I held my hands up like someone seeking peaceful surrender, hoping to dispel any possible notion that I was somehow the world’s clumsiest burglar or something along those lines. I could totally see myself on an episode of World’s Dumbest. “I am so, so sorry,” I said. Then, after a short pause, I pointed my finger in full accusation at the guilty party. “It was my dog. He saw a squirrel and jumped right over.”

  The man’s eyes followed my gesture to the fence before he turned back and looked at me with a bit of surprise in his expression. “You live next door?” He sounded pleasantly surprised, but I was sure that could not be the case, especially after such a horrible introduction.

  “Yeah.” I tucked my hair nervously behind my ears, flinching in shame at the streaks of mud that painted my arms. “I’m so sorry again. I’ll just be—”

  “Hey, we’ve met somewhere before, haven’t we?”

  My eyes widened in surprise when I realized that the neighborhood Adonis was directing all his ethereal curiosity onto me. I was standing in his backyard uninvited, with a mud-covered dog, and he didn’t seem the least bit upset. In fact, it was quite the contrary.

  He tilted his head to catch my eye and spoke politely but with undeniable interest all the same. “You ran out in the middle of traffic to help the dog who got hit, right?”

  For goodness sake! How is this guy not on display in a museum somewhere? I took a second to collect myself, then nodded swiftly. “Yes,” I confessed, “and you mentioned that you liked my slippers.” Really? That’s the best my demented mind can come up with?

  At that point, the guy would have been well within his rights to call the police and report the lunatic lurking on his property, but all he did was flash that breathtaking smile.

  “I did. I thought it was cute that you were wearing them.”

  This time, it was my turn to raise my eyebrows. Cute? Did he really just say that? In his defense, he seemed as out of sorts as I was, so I hurried to smoothly move the conversation along. “Well, I’m so sorry again. Dick doesn’t usually do things like this.” I cast a vicious glare down at my beloved spaniel. “You don’t have to worry about it being a regular thing. He’s a good boy, but sometimes he does fluster me.”

  “Don’t worry. I’m not mad, and I really love dogs.”

  “I’m not either. I mean, I’m a little mad, but I love Dick.”

  He smiled and almost laughed the way Beavis and Butthead would, and my cheeks turned three shades of red.

  “I love, um, Dick, as in my dog. I slapped my forehead. “Gosh, I must sound like a complete idiot. I’m afraid this conversation is getting out of control.”

  “You’re not an idiot. You’re just muddy and adorable.”

  I smiled.

  “If you don’t mind my asking,” he said, “what was your plan to get your dog back home once you coerced him away from the chase?”

  “My plan?” I said, but I certainly didn’t mind him asking. To be honest, I felt like he had every right to know. “Well, I guess I really didn’t plan it out,” I admitted, “but I wanted to just get him away from that squirrel.”

  A sharp snarl echoed in the air, and Dick curled his lips back in disapproval. Of course his sixteenth-century manners came back just in time for him to take offense.

  “Don’t get mad at me,” I muttered under my breath. “If you act like a dog, I’ll treat you like one!”

  A sparkling laugh interrupted our standoff, and the two of us raised our heads to gaze in wonderment at the man standing before us. His hands were shoved into his pockets, and despite the odd circumstances, he seemed to find the entire thing highly amusing. “I take it your boy is one of those more-person-than-pet, human-dogs, huh?”

  He knows about human-dogs? Seriously, did I just dream this guy up? Maybe necessity is the mother of invention after all. I mean, I’ve been kinda lonely. Hell, maybe it’s some sort of starvation syndrome. I haven’t eaten properly in quite some time.

  “Yeah.” I laughed a little breathlessly again. “Dick is definitely a human-dog. ‘Til today, I’ve never seen him chase anything but Perrier.”

  The guy laughed; it seemed to be easy to drum that up in him, and it was also unspeakably rewarding. “Is that so?” he said. Then, without a second thought, he sank down onto his knees in the middle of the muddy yard, rubbed the sides of Dick’s neck, and stretched his face into an indulgent smile. “Well, sometimes we just can’t help ourselves, can we, fella?”

  Then, either by accident or intention, his eyes flashed up to mine. I responded by blushing, quite embarrassingly, clear up to the very roots of my hair.

  “Dick doesn’t really like public displays of affection,” I blurted without thinking, then blushed bright scarlet all over again.

  What the heck is wrong with me? I’m lucky he’s so cool about all this. Must I really warn an obvious dog lover about the repercussions of petting mine?

  “Oh yeah?” he asked and kept up his petting.

  To be fair, Dick seemed to be greatly enjoying himself, wagging his tail into oblivion.

  “And what does he prefer?”

  I decided to go with the honest approach, no matter how crazy it would sound. “Actually, he’s a huge fan of, uh... game shows.”

  An incredulous expression crossed his face, and he dropped his hands at once, then darted his eyes swiftly between Dick and me before lifting gracefully to his feet. “Naturally,” he said.

  I couldn’t bear the awkward pause, so I tried to flee from it the best way I knew how, by putting an end to the uneasy encounter. “Well, again, I’m really sorry. We don’t want to take up any more of your day.” I took Dick firmly by the collar and glanced toward the guy’s house. “There’s no gate in the fence between our places, so do you think maybe we could—”

  “Of course!” he said quickly, realizing what I was trying to say. Then, with a gracious tilt of his head, he gestured in the direction of his kitchen and even opened the door and held it for us. “Be my guest.”

  I wiped my feet carefully on the welcome mat, well aware of the fact that I was dripping mud, and lifted Dick into my arms, to try to prevent him from mucking anything up.

  In all the years I had lived in the house next door, I had never once been inside that one. To be honest, it was actually a lot nicer than mine. While the layout was the same, the furnishings were much nicer. Whoever my new neighbor was and wherever he came from, it was clear that he had quite a lot more money than I did, something I already knew from the awesome car sitting in the driveway.

  “Sorry the place is such a mess,” he said self-consciously, brushing his hair out of his eyes. “We’re still unpacking, living out of boxes and baskets and bags.”

  “No worries. It’s fine,” I said quickly, pausing to look around. “You just moved in, right?” I asked, looking at the U-Haul boxes piled in the corner. One or two were open, but for the moment, it looked as if my fantasy man and his girlfriend had done little more than set up the coffeemaker.

  Chapter 11

  I BREATHED IN THE RICH aroma of the coffee, then released an appreciative sigh. When the man flashed me a quizzical look, I shook my head quickly, embarrassed all over again. “Sorry. It’s just... Well, I woke up yesterday
morning to discover I’d run out of coffee beans.” I flashed him a smile and struggled to readjust Dick in my arms. “It’s the ultimate tragedy, why I was down by Starbucks in the first place. I had too much blood in my caffeine system and couldn’t function properly.”

  Without even hesitating, he pulled two mugs from the cabinet. “It most certainly is a major life trauma.”

  I watched with wide eyes as he filled the mug with steaming deliciousness and walked back across the kitchen toward me to graciously take Dick out of my arms.

  “God gave them legs for a reason.”

  “But he’s all muddy, and—”

  “Makes no difference to me. He wants to run around, and I’ve got no problem with it.” He then set my pet down in the middle of the floor and patted him on the mud-matted head. “This whole place is a mess anyway. Hey, maybe he’ll actually get along with Sadie.”

  “Sadie?” I said, surprised as I took the mug from him, trying to gather my wits. I’d heard him call his girlfriend Stephanie, so I was sure he wasn’t talking about her.

  As if on cue, a soft shuffling noise came from upstairs, followed by the click-clacking of paws on the hardwood floor, coupled with labored panting and heavy breathing.

  “You two met yesterday, but I think you thought she was a boy,” he answered with a smile. “I’m pretty sure she likes your slippers too.”

  My mouth fell open in surprise as the gorgeous golden retriever sailed into the room, looking a thousand times better than she did the last time I saw her. Other than a slight limp in her left leg, I never would have known she’d been hit by a car.

  “You kept her?” I said, unable to believe my eyes. Then, without thinking, I sank down to the tile floor and ruffled my fingers though her golden fur. “You brought her back from the vet?”

  He ran his hand through his hair again, a self-conscious tick as adorable as it was distractingly sexy. “I’m afraid so.” He crouched down beside me and gazed at the dog with an affectionate smile. “I couldn’t just leave her there, not after she looked at me with those eyes. She didn’t have any tags and they couldn’t find a chip.”

  I shot him a sideways glance, feeling rather the same way. “That’s just... incredibly decent of you.” I pushed slowly to my feet. “I’m just sorry it’s caused problems with...” I shut myself up as my face grew hot with horror. I couldn’t believe I was so careless, giving myself away.

  The man glanced up at me for only a second before his face paled in shame.

  “Gosh, I’m so sorry!” I exclaimed. “I didn’t mean to—”

  “No, I’m sorry.” He pushed to his feet as well, now deliberately avoiding my eyes. “I guess we were pretty loud this morning, huh? I’m sorry if you heard any of that.”

  Shame above all shame! I silently scolded myself. I had spent the morning spying on my poor, beautiful neighbor, and now he was apologizing to me. “No, forget it,” I said quickly, dropping my eyes to the floor. “Everybody in New York lives in pretty close quarters. It’s bound to happen now and then.”

  Although he was clearly still embarrassed, he forced his face into a quick smile. “Have you lived here long?” he asked.

  I took a sip of coffee, and it just so happened to be the best I’d ever had. “Only all my life,” I said, grinning at him over the rim of the cup and receiving another gorgeous smile in return. “I went to college in New Orleans, and then came back to the neighborhood. I’ve been here ever since.”

  “The neighborhood.” His lips spread into another little grin as he knelt down again to pet the dogs. “You’re the second person to call it that.”

  I chuckled and set the mug on the counter. “It’s kind of the unofficial name. The people who live here are pretty loyal, and they can be kind of tough on outsiders,” I couldn’t help but add. “I was actually kind of surprised to see that this house sold.”

  It was a prodding statement, a question I felt I had the right to ask, and he didn’t seem to mind it. He just nodded, picked up his own coffee mug, took a scalding gulp, and then elaborated, “They didn’t want to sell it. I spent a good two weeks on the phone with some guy named Bill before they would even consider it.”

  I nodded thoughtfully, well aware of the culprit. Bill Reckers was the founder, president, and tyrant of the Riverwood Homeowners Association. If there was a keeper of the keys, he was certainly it. “Yeah, Bill’s a real piece of work,” I said, shaking my head.

  The two of us laughed quietly before I looked up curiously once more. I knew I should get the hell out of there, that I should just take my muddy dog and walk out of his house forever, but something made me stay.

  “So what made you settle on this house? Riverwood’s not the easiest place to move into.”

  His face tightened for a split second, and I instantly regretted the question. It wasn’t enough that I’d crash-landed in his backyard; now I was prying, asking for personal details when I didn’t even know him. A moment later, though, his face cleared into an easy smile.

  “I spent a few summers here when I was growing up. My grandmother had an apartment nearby, so I know the area. When Steph and I decided to move...” There was an awkward pause, during which his face tightened once more; by now, both of us were keenly aware that his girlfriend didn’t exactly want to move. “Anyway, I’ve always loved this place.”

  I nodded quickly, eager to steer the conversation to firmer ground. “Where’d you move from?”

  “Los Angeles,” he answered in a hurry without any inflection whatsoever. “I hated it.”

  My head snapped up quickly, as I was once again surprised by his sudden burst of honesty. He had a rather strange way of speaking, one that drew listeners in, a power shared by the intensity of his good looks.

  “You hated it?” I repeated, refusing to let him off the hook, no matter how hard he tried to backtrack and distract me with that hands-through-his-hair move of his. “Do explain.”

  He laughed quietly, and a delicate shade of pink crept into his cheeks. “I’m originally from San Francisco, a very different kind of city. In a lot of ways, it’s the antithesis of LA, more relaxed. People in San Fran are less concerned with... well, all the stupid, shallow, material, silicone things they concern themselves with in SoCal.”

  I tried to imagine it. Truth be told, I had never ventured any further west than Louisiana, so everything I knew about California, I had learned from movies and television. Still, it was easy enough to envision how plastic everyone was there. “I take it your girlfriend doesn’t want to be an East Coast girl, huh?” I guessed.

  Again, I was prying, but again, he seemed more flattered than bothered by it. In fact, he seemed a little relieved to have someone to talk with about it.

  “She came along... begrudgingly.” It was a generous edit, one I didn’t think the hotheaded girl deserved. “She was a model in LA,” he continued, his lips twitching upward in a cheerless wince. “She certainly wasn’t eager to move away.”

  “So why did you?”

  He looked up a bit uncertainly this time, as if I’d finally crossed some unspoken line. His lips parted to answer, but at that very moment, Dick and Sadie seemed to discover each other for the first time.

  “Whoa, girl!”

  He grabbed her gently around the chest, pressing Dick back with his other hand. I leapt in instantly to help, and together, the two of us separated the over-curious dogs.

  “I think that’s my cue to leave,” I said quickly, offering a gentle smile to the lovely retriever, still stunned that I was seeing her again. “Thanks again for the coffee... and for not calling the cops on me when you found me in your yard.”

  He laughed and led me to the front foyer. “It’s my pleasure. To be honest, I was thrilled to find you there.” There was a bit of noticeable reluctance when he opened the door. “You’re the first person I’ve really met in New York.”

  I turned around in surprise, staring back at him. I couldn’t help recalling that he tried to go on that run with hi
s girlfriend, that he wanted to explore the neighborhood with her, and that she’d rudely and quickly shot him down. “Well, we can’t have that!” I said. “I’m hardly a decent gauge of how New Yorkers act,” I said, preparing myself to go out on a very wiggly limb. “If you’d like, though, I’d be happy to show you around.”

  A slight pause followed my offer, as if he was pondering whether or not I was serious. In the end, he gave me a tentative smile and said, “I don’t want to impose—”

  “Nonsense!” I answered quickly. “You caffeinated me, so I owe you one,” I joked, hoping to lighten the mood. “I’m the one who’s imposing, breaking into your backyard, then covering your house in mud. Trust me, it’s the least I can do.”

  Again, those eyes studied me carefully, as if trying to decipher any hidden meaning in my words. When they came up blank, they returned to me above a hesitant smile. “Well, I think it’d be really great... and really nice of you.” His voice tightened almost suspiciously, as if he wasn’t used to such accommodation. “Thanks.”

  I flashed a nervous smile, unable to believe I’d just asked the breathtaking man to spend the day with me. “Of course! Let me just run back home and...”

  As if to highlight my point, a glop of mud fell suddenly off my shirt and landed with an incriminating splat on the floor between us. We bowed our heads in unison to survey the damage, my face colored by a mortified blush and his wearing a bemused smile.

  “Take a shower?” he finished innocently.

  We stared at each other for a split second, and then laughed again at the same time.

  I grabbed Dick’s collar and stepped outside, flashing a grin back over my shoulder. “Yeah.”

  Chapter 12

  I SCAMPERED BACK ACROSS the sidewalk as fast as my legs could carry me, tugging my cocker spaniel behind me all the while. My heart hammered violently in my chest, and a thin sheen of sweat broke out across my forehead as a symptom of my panic.