My Heart Belongs in Ruby City, Idaho

by Susanne Dietze

He nodded. “Now if you’ll all excuse me, I’d like to inquire about buying some cattle. Have a good supper.”

  “Cattle?” Rebecca’s question followed him out the door.

  After supper, Rebecca stood outside the restaurant and kissed Johnny’s fresh-shaven cheek. “I’ll see you in the morning. Be good to Uncle Giff, now.”

  “He won’t hear a peep out of me after I hit the hay—literally, because I’m bunking in the loft.”

  Uncle Giff nodded at Theodore. “You’ll see her home safely?”

  “Yes, sir.” Theodore offered his arm to Rebecca. “To the boardinghouse?”

  She took it and they walked in silence. Rebecca’s mind journeyed from Johnny sleeping in the hayloft to Uncle Giff’s little house behind the livery, apparently too small for Tad, too. He’d have a rough night sleeping on the cot, if the prisoners were difficult. His deputy duties kept him plenty busy. Now he’d have to lose a day of work to take her to Silver City for the annulment—

  “I don’t blame you for not wanting to talk to me.”

  Rebecca blinked. How silly she’d been to let her mind wander when she was alone with Theodore. “There’s a lot on my mind, I suppose.” She halted her steps. “I didn’t like arguing with you, Theodore.”

  “Me, neither.” He turned and faced her but looked everywhere but her face. “It’s just hard sometimes, our situation.”

  She licked her lips. “I couldn’t let Bowe bleed out, Theodore, no matter what he’s done or where he was. And if Mr. Wilkie is the only other person in town who knows how to bind a wound, what else can I do? I’m sorry it embarrassed you, though.”

  “Seeing you in the saloon shocked me, I won’t lie. But I shouldn’t have shamed you like that, and I accept why you did it. Healing folks is part of you, even if it’s still a little difficult for me. I didn’t know that about you.”

  It was part of her, wasn’t it? She hadn’t hesitated today. “There’s an awful lot about a person that can’t fit into a stack of letters, isn’t there?”

  He chuckled. “I’m amazed I filled up a stack of letters to you. My life is boring as mush.”

  “Hardly.”

  They looked into each other’s eyes for a half minute. Would he kiss her? He hadn’t so much as taken her hand, because she was married to Tad—oh, now that she’d thought of him, it was difficult to stop. He was the only person she’d ever kissed, and her lips tingled just remembering it.

  But Tad had no business here, between her and Theodore—who still didn’t bend his head to kiss her.

  Instead, he pivoted away from her and offered his arm again.

  Maybe he was thinking of Tad, too, or at least her temporary marriage. Or maybe her breath smelled like her trout supper.

  She kept her head down, just in case. “Thank you for being willing to help Miss Evans earlier.”

  “I did it for you.”

  “I know.” Even though it would have been nice if he’d done it to be compassionate to a hungry family instead. “Johnny seemed to like her.”

  “I’ll get to work cleaning out a room for him. He should be with family, especially once we’re married.”

  “Thank you.” She owed Theodore so much. He’d provided for her, as he promised in his letters. More than she could ever repay.

  There was no good night kiss on Mrs. Horner’s porch. “Good night, Theodore.”

  “Sleep well, Rebecca.” Theodore doffed his hat and left before she was in the door.

  She went upstairs with the realization that she and Theodore hadn’t discussed the visit to Judge Harris tomorrow.

  Sleep eluded her, and eventually, the cold fingers of a gray dawn touched her room. She rose, dressed in a clean white shirtwaist and her red calico skirt, and pinned her hair into a tidy knot. She gathered a calico bonnet, her paisley shawl, and checked her appearance in the mirror on the dresser. Two little glimmers sparkled in the lamplight: Ulysses’s jasper and Tad’s opal ring.

  She had yet to return it to him, but if ever there was a day to do it, this was it. Her holey skirt pockets were fine places to carry handkerchiefs but not valuables, and it didn’t seem appropriate to let it roll around in her beaded bag. The safest place for it was on her finger, so she slipped it on for the first time in a month and headed downstairs.

  If anyone noticed the opal ring during breakfast, no one said a word. She’d told Mrs. Horner about the judge’s accident last night. “We should be home by supper, I expect.”

  “Safe travels, dearie. I…hope everything goes just as it should today.”

  A quick, easy annulment. Rebecca nodded. “Thank you, ma’am.”

  Mrs. Horner’s eyes creased when she said good-bye, a look Johnny also bore when she walked into the livery. He hitched Madge to the wagon, along with another mule named Sheila. The wagon was already stocked with blankets for the judge’s journey home. Had Johnny done that, or had Tad?

  “Are you earning your keep?” She cast him a teasing look and then greeted the mules. She wasn’t as well acquainted with Sheila as she was with Madge, but both mules nuzzled her arms with their broad noses.

  “I sure am, and I appreciate the opportunity. I don’t cotton to mining anymore, so Gifford offered me a temporary job until Tad and the sheriff find that Gang of Four.”

  The thought of Tad pursuing the Gang made her breakfast roil in her stomach. But enough of that. She had a safe life ahead of her, and now Johnny was here, too. Things looked bright.

  Johnny ambled to her side. “Gifford and Tad are out and about, so it’s just you and me here, sis. I’ve got to tell you, you don’t look happy.”

  “I didn’t sleep well, is all.” She rolled her eyes.

  “Neither did I. That hayloft isn’t as comfortable as Gifford claims, but that’s not what I meant. Why are you doing this?”

  “The annulment has been the plan since the moment Tad and I realized our mistake. He had a commitment, and I had mine.”

  “I mean the marrying part. Why did you come out here to marry a fellow, sight unseen?”

  So many reasons, all twisted together. “Survival.”

  Johnny’s brow furrowed. “You were fine in Missouri.”

  “No I wasn’t.” Her hand slipped from Madge’s gray coat. “You were gone; Raymond was gone; Ma and Pa were long, long gone; and I was lonely and hungry and aching to be part of a family again, to have someone care about me and who I could care about. Where I’d be loved again.”

  He gaped, wordless. Then he blinked. “You’re right.”

  Remorse flooded to her fingertips, not for what she’d said but how she’d said it. “I shouldn’t have been so blunt. I didn’t mean to hurt you.”

  “I didn’t mean to hurt you when I left, either, but I did.” He kicked the straw underfoot with his toe. “I was seventeen and figured you’d be just fine with Raymond to watch over you. He didn’t have much choice but to leave you when the war came, I suppose, but I should’ve come back. You were only sixteen.”

  “If you had come back in ’61, you would’ve enlisted and fought, too.” She reached for his hand. “Nothing would have changed.”

  “Rebecca—”

  “Don’t feel badly, Johnny. Hurting your feelings was not my intention when I told you.”

  “I know, and I understand why you came here now. But I’m not sure why you’re going through with it. You and Theodore don’t seem happy.”

  Johnny might be her brother, but in many ways, he didn’t know her anymore. “You mean well, but this life Theodore offered me, that I accepted, is the life I always wanted. I will marry Theodore and that’s final.”

  “Here you go: my testimony that the marital mix-up was entirely accidental, unintentional, and immediately regretted.” Orr stood from his spot at his desk and handed Tad a folded sheet of paper. “For good measure, I added that I’ll be certain of the bride and groom’s full names before I officiate any more weddings.”

  “Wise.” Tad shoved the letter into his coat pocket without looking
at it. “Although you’d think the bride and groom would’ve taken care of introducing themselves just fine.”

  Orr thumped Tad’s arm. “It’ll be over soon.”

  That’s what Tad kept telling himself, and someday he’d look back on this crazy month and get a good laugh at the ridiculousness of it all. Today, though, it didn’t feel right, like a bone had broken and wasn’t setting the way it should. It would heal but it would never be the same again.

  Tad tapped his desk, where Jeroboam Jones made himself comfortable, crossing one ankle over the opposite knee. “Thanks for keeping an eye on things. The sheriff’s supposed to be back today, but I’ll rest easier knowing there’s someone keeping an eye on our guests.”

  The bickering of Bowe Brown and the Andersons carried into the office from the jail cells.

  “No problem, Deputy.” Jeroboam’s chest puffed out. “Happy to help while you take care of business with the missus.”

  It was a joke, but he couldn’t rouse a smidgen of humor when he left the office. Yesterday, when Rebecca asked if they could go to Silver City and get the judge, he’d succumbed to the anger he’d been doing his best to control. He’d fought against Theodore, hating his disapproval of Rebecca nursing Bowe. Then he’d fought with Pa about the ranch. The lack of his father’s blessing aggrieved him to the bone, but he’d fought against the pain and anger.

  When Rebecca asked if they could go to Silver City today for the annulment, though, the ability to control his anger snuffed out. He couldn’t fight it anymore.

  He had no business being angry. This annulment had been planned since the moment Rebecca learned he was a deputy. Tad knew where things stood. He didn’t want to hurt Theodore or Rebecca. And yet—he didn’t want to do this today. He’d rather sit in the county office, processing a pile of paperwork and drinking stale coffee while listening to Bowe and the Andersons argue.

  It didn’t even help that he’d started to settle his ranching plans. After speaking to the broker and inquiring with a few fellows who were familiar with the stock, he’d withdrawn his savings from Bilson at the bank and purchased the available herd.

  Tad turned into the livery, where Johnny checked the wagon hitch. Rebecca, bright in her white blouse and red skirt, had arrived, ready for her annulment. Theodore stood at her side. Tad’s teeth clenched, even though Theodore’s presence was expected. If Tad were in his cousin’s fancy catalog-bought shoes, he’d want to ensure the annulment went as planned, too.

  Theodore fed Madge a chunk of something from his hand, revealing a glimpse of the boy who’d been raised in the livery business. It was easy to miss that fellow most days, hidden as he was beneath the fancy clothes and shopkeeper’s apron, but at that moment, Tad missed his cousin and the way things used to be, when they’d been like brothers.

  From now on, he’d do his best to recall that Theodore when he was tempted to lose patience. Still, Theodore’s dandified tie and coat lacked something for the journey. “You might want to wear a hat to Silver City. Looks to be a warm one today.”

  Theodore brushed off his hands, and flakes of orange fell to the livery floor. Ah, Madge and Sheila had enjoyed carrots, then. “I’m expecting the fireworks and a shipment of crystal today. Corny won’t be able to handle them herself, so I’ll be staying here.”

  Whoever delivered the shipment could leave it in the storeroom, couldn’t they? Tad had just seen the old Theodore, but he was gone again, replaced by this stiff stranger who was more concerned with his mercantile than anyone or anything. Maybe Tad was wrong, but it sure seemed Theodore didn’t want to close the mercantile and miss out on the opportunity to make money, even for something this important.

  Then again, that was what appealed to Rebecca, wasn’t it? Theodore’s ability to provide for her?

  Johnny took Rebecca’s elbow. “Should I go along to Silver City with you two?”

  Tad peeked at her, but her eyes were on her brother. “Not on your first day of work. It’s only a mile. We’ll be back soon.”

  “Is it proper?” Johnny’s loud whisper almost echoed in the livery.

  Tad almost answered that he was legally her husband, a very proper escort, but Rebecca laughed. “I imagine we’ll cross other travelers along the way, and the judge will be with us on the way back.”

  “Travel safely, then.” Theodore waved and was gone before Johnny helped Rebecca onto the wagon seat.

  Tad climbed aboard and doffed his hat to Johnny, who waved despite his furrowed brow. With a few words to the mules, they set off to put an official end to their blunder of a marriage.

  Lord, help me to keep my mouth shut and get to Silver City.

  Because once he opened his mouth, he’d burn a bridge between him and Theodore that could never be rebuilt.

  The mile-long ride to Silver City wouldn’t take long, but Rebecca couldn’t sit still on the hard wagon seat. She fidgeted with the torn cuticle of her thumb, loosened her bonnet strings, and then shifted position. Riding off to seek an annulment so she could marry her husband’s cousin would undoubtedly prove to be the most awkward event of her life, and Tad wasn’t making the experience any easier. He bent forward, elbows on his knees while his hands held the reins, in a posture that communicated he didn’t want to talk.

  Well, she wanted to, to show they could still be friendly cousins. “Pretty day, isn’t it?”

  “Mm-hm.”

  “The clouds are like cotton batting. I’m glad it’s not like my first day in town, when it rained buckets. Remember that?”

  He looked at her then. “I don’t think I’ll ever forget it.”

  That rainy day was their wedding day. Fine thing to talk about on the way to dissolve our marriage—which isn’t a marriage, so quit feeling so guilty about it. She chewed her lip. Think of something else to say, quick.

  “So what did your father mean last night about the cattle?”

  “I purchased some.”

  “Cows, for the livery?”

  “Nope.” He urged the mules to the right. “I’m starting a new venture. I filed a claim in a creek valley some miles distant and I’m going to start a ranch.”

  Shock pried her mouth open. Leave his father and a successful business for a risk that might leave him with nothing? Then again, it was none of her affair. He was to be her cousin.

  Tad glanced at her, at long last. “Are you going to tell me I’m a fool, like Pa?”

  She found her tongue. “Not if this is what you want.”

  “I’m tired of moving. I like Ruby City, and I can have land both places, and tending cattle seems the best way to settle somewhere permanent.” He looked away. “So when’s the wedding?”

  “We haven’t discussed it.” She swiped her damp palms on her red skirt. How long did an annulment take, anyway? She’d assumed she and Tad could show up in court, plead their case to the judge, allow him a good laugh at their expense, and be done with it.

  That may have been naive of her. This could take months, but maybe that was a good thing. Now, she and Theodore would have time to plan a real wedding like she’d always secretly dreamed about, surrounded by friends and family.

  Although she hadn’t minded the lack of friends or family at her wedding to Tad—

  She swatted away the dangerous thought like Madge’s tail batting a horsefly. “Can Johnny remain with you and Uncle Giff awhile longer? I hate to ask, because I don’t want my brother to be a burden on you.”

  “Johnny’s practically kin. He’s no burden, and he shouldn’t be considered one to Theodore, either.”

  His swipe at Theodore’s lack of hospitality stung. “Theodore and I talked last night. Once we’re w–wed, Johnny will stay with us.”

  The rugged road—what there was of one—pitched downward. The mules skittered down a rocky incline and the wagon slid forward. Tad yanked on the reins with his left hand while his right arm flung out in front of Rebecca, bracing her on the seat. When the wagon stilled, he looked down at where his forearm hovered over her. H
e snatched his arm back. “Sorry.”

  “You kept me from tumbling from the wagon, silly. Thank you.”

  Instead of answering, he jerked the brake and hopped down from the wagon. He bent to check the animals’ legs, backsides, and ears. He sure was thorough. He did everything but examine the mules’ teeth.

  “Are they hurt?” If not, they needed to move along.

  “Doesn’t look like it.” He climbed beside her on the seat and released the brake, making that “let’s go” click of his tongue for the mules. “Come on, gals.”

  Sheila lifted her feet, but Madge refused to twitch so much as an ear. Tad clicked his tongue again, Sheila moved forward, but Madge didn’t budge.

  Rebecca’s eyes narrowed. “What is it?”

  “I don’t know. Madge is being stubborn.”

  A tiny smile tugged at her lips. “She is a mule, after all.”

  Tad snickered, a good sign that they might still be friends after their annulment—and their tense words moments ago. She might have complicated feelings where he was concerned, but the truth was, she didn’t want to lose Tad altogether.

  The thought of it made her queasy.

  He reset the break, descended again, and crossed to Madge’s side. “You don’t often live up to the reputation of your kind, but today you’re as muleheaded as they come.”

  Rebecca sat back against the tiny wagon seat. “Why’d we bring mules instead of horses, if they can be unreasonable?”

  “They’re more sure-footed on climbs. They can see where their hind feet are going. If they see something questionable or dangerous, they won’t step into it. Unlike people.”

  Was he referring to her? Or maybe she was battling her own will and heard every word as condemnation. But marrying Theodore wasn’t questionable or dangerous. It was safe and smart.

  Still, her ankles wobbled when she slid from the wagon and inched to Madge’s side. “Come on, Madgie. The ground is flatter up here, see?” She ambled up to where the road straightened out and beckoned with her hands.

  “She’s not a dog, Rebecca. She won’t come if you call her like that.”