Wonderlust (Steel Roses #1)

by B. L. Wilde

  “She is crazy,” I laughed.

  “I know.” Alex looked at his phone. “Steve is waiting downstairs for us. Do you want anything to eat before we go?” I shook my head. “I should change your nickname to Light Weight.”

  “Maybe, but I’m kind of getting fond of Straight Lace.”

  “Are you, now?” His eyes danced with humor.

  “Thanks for looking after me last night. I’m sorry I drank so much.”

  “Don’t be sorry. Milly has a habit of getting people drunk.” That was an understatement. She’s practically tipped the drink down my throat last night.

  “I’ll have to watch her at Diego’s party.”

  “That might be wise,” Alex grinned. “Come on, let’s go home.” I don’t know why, but my heart skipped a beat as he spoke. We’d be at his hilltop mansion for months now while he worked on new material for his album. In that time, we would grow even closer. I was in fear of losing my heart completely.

  Chapter Fourteen

  “What do you mean, you know all about it?” Alex glared at Diego on the day of his party. All our secret planning had been in vain, apparently.

  “Oh please. It’s the talk of the town. I was at Monika's last week and they were all talking about it.” Turning toward me, Diego pulled me in for a tight hug. “You, Baby Cakes, are the best, and as a thank you, I‘ve invited lover man tonight. You can finally show him what he’s missing out on.” What was he talking about?

  “Who are you talking about?” Alex frowned.

  “David Barclay is coming to the party.”

  “WHAT?!” I gasped. Fuck no! I didn’t need this, not now.

  “Why did you invite that fucker?” Alex fumed. “Nat has made it perfectly clear that she isn’t interested!”

  “You have no idea when it comes to a woman’s heart, Alex. Stay out of this. I need to turn Natasha into the belle of the ball before Mr. Barclay arrives. Come on, Baby Cakes. You’re coming to the pool house with me right now.” Why couldn’t my life ever be simple?

  Diego approved of the silver sequin dress that I’d bought for the party. It was short and cut low on my back, but I hadn’t gotten the dress with David in mind.

  People were already arriving. I could hear them outside by the pool house.

  “I don’t care how much you fight this, the hair is going to be down tonight. It will show off your makeup. David will have a hard on the moment he sets eyes on you.”

  “I can’t believe you invited him.” Groaning, I let Diego undo my hair from its bun.

  “Jesus, how much hair do you have? This natural wave is to die for. You really should wear it down more often. Oh! Let me get my curlers. I want to bring the wave out a little more.” This was going to take all night. It was a good job Diego was ready. The birthday boy had gone all out with a bright blue suit, baby pink shirt, and six-inch pink platform shoes.

  An hour later, Diego was finished. “Oh, Baby Cakes, you look like a fucking model. You are a rare beauty.” I blushed as he touched the side of my face. “The best way to get a man’s attention is by making him jealous. You’ll have every male eating out of your hands tonight. Now, you go and own it!” Slapping my butt, he practically pushed me out of the pool house. “I’ll be out in ten minutes.”

  Trying to walk gracefully in my four-inch heels, I looked out at the faces watching me. Holy fuck, the place was crammed already. I didn’t recognize a single person.

  As I made my way toward the main house to look for a familiar face, I found the one person I didn’t really want.

  “Nat,” David gasped. “I’ve been looking for you everywhere.” He looked casual in his grey trousers and white linen shirt.

  “What are you doing here?” I sighed, shaking my head at him.

  “I was invited. Diego said…”

  “Diego got it wrong. I don’t want you here.”

  “Nat, don’t be like this. Why don’t we go up to your room and talk?” He brushed his fingertips down my arm and I knew exactly what he was up to. “You look beautiful.”

  “You flew all this way just for that? You chose Sarah! You don’t get it both ways!”

  “I can’t stop thinking about you, Nat. Every time I close my eyes, you’re there. Please? One last time, that’s all I’m asking for. Then I’ll leave you alone. Give me one more night. I want you so fucking much!” Tears were forming in the corner of my eyes. I didn’t want to deal with this right now.

  “Hey, Jackass!” I spun around at the male voice coming from right behind me. “Who the fuck do you think you are?” Alex was towering over David with a look of pure rage on his face. It was sexy as hell.

  “I don’t think this conversation involves you. Why don’t you fuck off and do a line of coke or something?” David really shouldn’t have been goading Alex like that.

  “Listen hear, Fuck Face! You’re in my home, harassing my PA! This fucking conversation wouldn’t even be happening without me!”

  “She was my PA first!” David spat. Oh, crap! Were they really fighting over me?

  “Are we going to whip our dicks out next? Because I don’t think you’ll have anything on me,” Alex smirked smugly. “My groupies even have a pet name for my monstrous cock.” They did? Was it wrong that I wanted to ask what that name was? There seemed to be quite a gathering of people to witness this confrontation now.

  “Fuck off, Rock Star! She’s in love with me. Has been for years. You won’t break her. She’s fucking mine!”

  “The only person that has broken her is you!” Alex pushed him hard, and I knew that was my cue to step in.

  “Stop it!” I screamed. “David, just go!”

  “But Nat…”

  “GO!” I seethed. “Whatever happened between us…it’s over! Leave. Me. Alone!” I turned toward Alex. “And you…get me a fucking drink.” He grinned, nodding before making his way over to the bar.

  “This isn’t over, Nat. I know deep down you still want me,” David glared, storming off into the crowd.

  “You sure know how to start a party,” Alex suddenly whispered in my ear, handing me a vodka and coke. It made me jump. “You look absolutely beautiful, by the way.” Reaching out, he twisted one of his fingers around a strand of my hair. “You should wear your hair down more often.”

  “Maybe I will.” Alex looked at me in surprise as I downed my drink and then walked back over to the bar to get another.

  “Pace yourself this time,” he warned. “I can’t always be around to hold your hair back when you’re sick.”

  “But you do it so well,” I purred, running my hands down his strong chest. The drink was making me bold already.

  “Are you flirting with me again, Straight Lace?” The pool area may have been crowded, but gazing into his piercing blue eyes, all I could see was him.

  “What would you do if I said yes?”

  He studied me for a few short moments. “You’re letting the drink do the talking.” Looking around, he acknowledged a few people before Diego finally came out of his pool house. “Pace yourself, remember.” With that, he walked into the crowd away from me. Dammit, that didn’t go as planned!

  I spent the next four hours propped up at the bar, drinking vodka and coke after vodka and coke, watching Alex mingle around the party. Women threw themselves at him like they always did, and that only fueled my drinking.

  “If you want him, why don’t you go and get him?” Milly was suddenly sitting next to me on one of the stools. “You’ve been watching him for hours.”

  “Huh?” I acted dumb, sipping my drink.

  “He’s crazy about you. You know that, right?” I choked on my drink.

  “What?”

  “Alex is crazy about you. All he spoke about last week was you. Do us all a favor and just get on with it. Just remember, if you break his heart, I will break you! He doesn’t need any more of that shit.” Any more? Had Alex had his heart broken before?

  “I…I…”

  “I haven’t seen him this way
over a woman for a long time. Go slow and steady and you’ll be fine.” I was so drunk that I wasn’t sure if she was talking about sex positions or something else. I couldn’t see Alex taking it slow and steady ever. Hot and fast was more how I imagined.

  “I need to pee,” I slurred, standing up. The line was too long by the pool house, so I decided to go upstairs to my bedroom and use the toilet there.

  Stumbling out after washing my hands, I made my way onto the private balcony. I could see the party below me. Diego had jumped into the pool, as had another twenty or so people. They were all having the time of their lives down there.

  “Have you had enough of the party already?” Alex’s voice came from behind me. I spun around, impressed that I managed to still be standing in my drunken state. “Jesus, Nat. I told you to pace yourself.” He crossed the distance between us and cupped my face. “How much have you had?”

  “Only a few,” I giggled, falling into his arms as I lost my footing.

  “What am I going to do with you?” Shaking his head at me, he ran his hand through my hair. He was so close; I could smell his sweet scent. His lips were too tempting, and the alcohol had made me brave. Slowly, I began to move toward his mouth. My body began to tremble; I had no idea if it was from fear or adrenaline. “Straight Lace, what are you doing?” he whispered as my lips brushed his.

  “I want to kiss you,” I purred, crashing my lips against his. I was sure the moment our lips connected that it would erupt into one of those movie kisses when it felt like planets aligned, but as I pressed against him, all I got was resistance.

  “Nat.” Gently, he pushed me away. “No, not like this.” Fuck, rejection coursed through me. Why did I think someone as gorgeous as Alex would want me? I was a fool.

  “I’m…I…I’m sorry.” I pulled back quickly, blushing from head to toe. Why did I listen to Milly?

  “Nat, it’s…”

  “No, it’s the drink.” I tried to walk away, but I stumbled and Alex caught me. “I’m fine!” I snapped. “Just go back to the party!” He looked torn. “GO!” I yelled, pulling away from his hold and storming into my room, slamming the door as I went.

  How was I was going to face him in the morning? I’d thrown myself at him and he’d rejected me.

  I was up early. Luckily, I’d remembered to drink a glass of water before I passed out last night so I didn’t have a mega hangover to deal with. The clean up crew was already clearing up after the party as I wandered toward my office with a few pieces of toast. Part of me was hoping that Alex had been too drunk to remember last night, but from what I could remember, he hadn’t seemed under the influence at all.

  I battled all morning with how to deal with the situation, but the more I thought about it, the more worked up I got. He’d been chasing me for months, yet the moment I made a move, he rejected me. This was all a game to him. He’d been playing me this whole time! His words the night I arrived came crashing back to me. ‘I’ll send her packing with a broken heart within three months.’ It had been just over three months and I was completely besotted with the man. He’d broken me and I’d stupidly let it happen.

  By the time Alex did surface from his room, I was like a raging volcano. He was going to fucking pay!

  “You’re up early,” he called, entering my office. I had my back to him so he couldn’t see the pure hatred on my face yet. “I thought you were still in your room sleeping.” I didn’t answer him. “Nat?” He touched my shoulder and I flinched, the rage boiling to the surface.

  “Don’t fucking touch me!” I seethed, spinning around in my seat. Alex was speechless. Clearly, he hadn’t expected me to react this way. “You are a fucking asshole!”

  “Nat, what the fuck have I done now?” He ran his hands through his hair while I stood up and pushed at his chest. “Calm the fuck down. What’s wrong?”

  “You, that’s what’s fucking wrong! You played me. This whole time you’ve been playing me! I liked you, Alex! I fucking liked you! I tried to deny it, but I couldn’t do it anymore! Then you reject me just like you said you would. Do you get some sort of sick satisfaction out of breaking women? Was Milly in on your plan? Oh yeah, you’re really fucking crazy about me! Well, fuck you! FUCK YOU, ALEX! I’ll get over this! I’ve done it before, I can do it again!”

  “Are you fucking done?” That was his response? I’d fucking show him. Taking a step closer, I raised my hand to slap the smug smile off his face. I never got the chance. He grabbed my arm, pushing me up against the wall, and when he did, I lost the will to even breathe. What was he doing? I wasn’t even given a second to think before his lips crashed against mine urgently. I moaned into his mouth, wrapping my arms around his neck. Holy fuck, I was kissing Alex Harbour! When I moaned, he slipped his tongue in to meet mine. He let out a primal groan as his hands roamed the side of my body, gripping my butt to pull me closer against his growing erection. My hands were gripping his hair so hard it must have been painful, but he didn’t stop kissing me until we needed to come up for air.

  “I didn’t kiss you last night because you were fucking drunk! The truth is, I wanted to bury my cock deep inside you the moment I saw you in that fucking dress last night, but I wasn’t going to take advantage of you.” Oh! How wrong was I?

  “You did?” I whispered, still clinging to his shoulders. I wanted his cock buried inside me, too.

  “I still do,” he smirked, moving to undo the bun that was holding my hair up. “Last night, when you wore your hair down, you have no idea how much I wished you’d done that for me and not that prick in a suit.” My hair tumbled down my shoulders as he spoke. “You are so fucking beautiful, Natasha.” He traced my lips with his thumb. I was a panting mess at this stage, wanting him to kiss me again.

  “It was for you,” I whispered, unable to meet his gaze. That was all it took. His lips were fierce against mine again in a heartbeat. His hands explored my body greedily and roughly. I couldn’t get enough of feeling his hands on me.

  “I want to take you up to my bedroom, but you can say no,” he breathed against my mouth. Why the hell would I say no?

  “I want to,” I groaned, pulling on his pouty bottom lip with my teeth. Shit, I could kiss these lips all day.

  “You go first. We don’t want everyone talking, so I’ll join you in five minutes.” Were we really going to do this?

  I raced up to my bedroom, quickly changing my underwear that I feared was almost ruined from our make out session in my office. My sexy red lace panties seemed like a good replacement. I brushed my teeth again and tamed my hair before putting on a long T-shirt. There was no point in putting lots of clothes back on. It would only be more to take off. I wandered into Alex’s room when I was done. He wasn’t there yet. Running my fingers over his metal bed frame, I took a long, deep breath. What was I doing?

  “You can leave at any time, you know. Don’t look so scared.” Alex stood in the doorway in just a pair of sweats that hung really low off his hips. Oh, that’s what I was doing! Having sex with a rock star!

  “I’m not scared, just a little nervous. It’s not everyday you get to sleep with a rock star.” I gave him a shy smile, moving to the center of the room.

  “I’m just a man, Straight Lace. Don’t over think it.”

  “Just a man,” I snorted. “Yeah, right.” I took in his perfect form. There wasn’t anything about his body that I’d change. I wanted to trace every line of his tattoos with my fingertips and run my tongue over every inch of his body.

  “Are you sure about this?” He was taking slow steps toward me as he spoke.

  “Yes.” Why did he keep asking? Wasn’t he sure about this? “Are you having second thoughts? Do you not want to cross this line because I’m your PA?”

  He chuckled, shaking his head. “No, I want you, Nat. I’ve wanted you for a long time.” I swallowed hard, watching his eyes fill with lust.

  “Maybe you should just get on with it then,” I challenged with a smirk.

  “If you insist.
” Licking his lips, he stood in front of me. I closed the small distance between us and placed his hands on my butt. He squeezed hard before pulling me flush against his chest. “I’m going to rock your world, Baby.” I giggled at his words until he crashed his lips against mine. My knees went weak and I lost all control, gripping his back as he picked me up by my butt and carried me to his bed. His hands were frantic in their movements. He seemed to want to touch me everywhere at once. His hands skimmed over my breasts making me groan into his mouth, but he didn’t linger there. His hands went lower until they skimmed my lace panties. I let out a cry of pleasure at just the thought of his hands down there.

  “I’ve been fantasizing about the way you cum since I laid eyes on you. I’m going to make you cum really quick, Straight Lace. It’ll help to relax you. Then I’m going to fuck you with my monstrous cock.” It wasn’t a question; it was a statement. As his hand slid inside my panties and began to stroke me, I gave in willingly. His fingers were skilled; the pace was already driving me crazy and he’d barely started. I began to claw at his sheets as my hips rocked against the glorious torture. “That’s it. Give it up for me.” He ran his thumb over my clit minutes later while biting down on the sweet spot on my neck. I came abruptly and embarrassingly loud. How the fuck did he do that? I’d never come so hard in my life, and he’d only used his fingers.

  “Holy fuck!” I panted, holding my chest as he gazed down at me.

  “We’re not quite there yet. I’ll move onto fucking next, though,” he smirked, moving to pick up a remote control. He pressed a few buttons and some bluesy music came on. “You can moan as loud as you want and not feel insecure.” He winked at my puzzled face. Oh!

  “I was a little loud,” I giggled, putting my hand over my mouth.

  “You’re about to get louder,” he smoldered, picking up a pocketknife from his nightstand. Most women would be petrified of a guy holding a knife above them, but I’d seen Alex cutting coke with it, so I was intrigued as to what he was planning. After cutting the bottom of my T-shirt, he placed the knife back on the bedside table before ripping the material wide open. It was the sexiest thing anyone had ever done to me. I had a feeling, knowing Alex, it was going to get a lot dirtier, too. “Fuck me, you’re a walking wet dream, Nat,” he gasped, looking down at me. His eyes roamed over every inch of my body, then widened suddenly. Oh fuck! How could I have forgotten about my Steel Roses tattoo? It would be visible to him now. “What the hell is that?” His face was bemused as he ran his fingertips over my ink.