Start a Fire: A Dark High School Bully Romance (The Savage Crew Book 1)

by Julia Wolf

She gasped. “Holy shit, did I make you sad again?”

  I giggled, leaning into her. “No, you’re good.” And then I borrowed the words she’d used earlier tonight. “You’re a real one, Hells.”

  She pumped her fist. “Yes, I’m rubbing off on you already.”

  Helen and I rolled down the windows to her mom’s car, blasted music I didn’t know, and sang at the top of our lungs. I made up lyrics, but that made it better. By the time she dropped me off at home, I’d just about pushed aside the unwanted feelings that had been stirred up by seeing Sebastian touching someone else. A night of sleep and eviscerating him in my dreams would probably do the trick to get rid of the rest.

  Chapter Fifteen

  I’d just fallen asleep when the constant buzzing of my phone pulled me back to consciousness. I slid my thumb over the screen, shocked to see a few unread texts. All from the same number.

  Grace.

  It’s me.

  You didn’t say hi.

  You ran.

  Didn’t I tell you not to run?

  Wake up, Grace.

  You don’t text me back within the next five minutes, I’m coming over. How do you think your mom will feel about me showing up?

  I’d never given him my number. Then again, he hadn’t asked. Now, I realized that was probably because he already had it.

  I texted back because I had no doubt he’d make good on his word and bust down my door if he had to.

  Me: I was asleep.

  Bash: Ah, there she is. The little runner girl.

  Me: I don’t know what you’re talking about. How’d you get my number?

  Bash: You need to know Helen is my friend first.

  Oh, I’d cut a bitch. Earlier, I’d thought Helen and I were good, but now, I wasn’t so sure—not if she was giving my number to Sebastian when she knew I wanted him out of my life.

  Me: Noted. Good night.

  Bash: Nope. Come outside.

  Me: Never.

  Bash: I’ll come in, Grace. I’m not bluffing.

  Me: Have fun in jail then. I’m done with this conversation.

  Bash: Still running.

  Me: You’re not going to gaslight me into coming outside.

  Bash: Not gaslighting. Just stating facts. Get out here.

  Me: You’ve lost your mind.

  Bash: You keep saying that. It’s getting boring.

  Me: Then leave.

  Bash: It’s kinda peaceful out here. The moon is full, stars bright. I won’t touch you, Grace. I made a promise, and I always keep my promises. Just get out here.

  Me: I’ll give you five minutes, then I’m coming back inside. If you touch me, I’ll scream. And I’m only coming out for the stars.

  It was only half past midnight, but my mom had fallen asleep a couple hours ago. She kept up a good show, but her schedule was wearing on her already. As much as I hated how exhausted she was, it worked in my favor this time. I left the apartment quietly, dressed in a hoodie and sweats, without worrying she’d wake up and find me gone. I doubted she’d mind me going outside to meet Sebastian anyway. She thought he was a total sweetheart—her exact words—and I was eighteen with a good head on my shoulders.

  Little did she know Sebastian was an overstepping lunatic and I seemed to lose all sense of self-preservation around him.

  Sebastian Vega sat on the short set of steps leading to my building, his long legs stretched out in front of him. I tromped down the steps, turning to face him at the bottom. He patted the step next to him, and I shook my head.

  “I’m good here.”

  His hand darted out, snagging the front of my hoodie. He didn’t tug me into his lap like he might have normally done, though, just hung onto the fabric, rubbing it between his fingers.

  “Sit down, Grace.” He sounded tired, and I hoped like hell he was tired of me.

  I sighed. “Can we just...not do this anymore?”

  His brow creased with a frown, and it did nothing to detract from how devastatingly perfect his face was. Quite the opposite, really. I was pretty sure he’d been born to frown. Anger only heightened his attractiveness. If he ever smiled, full wattage, I might not have recognized him.

  He dropped his hand heavily onto his lap. “Why didn’t you say hi at the T? You and Hells left so fast, I almost wasn’t sure it was you.”

  “Why do you think I saw you?”

  For a second, amusement glittered behind his eyes, and that full moon he’d lured me out with reflected in the black pools. But that fell away quickly, leaving only endless darkness behind.

  “Oh, I know you did. Hells bitched me out after she took you home.”

  God, Sebastian was right. Helen really was his friend first. It would serve me to always remember that.

  I pushed a rock around with my toe, hating every second of this. “Why would she bitch you out?”

  His stare weighed on me like gravity. “The thing I like about you is how straightforward you are, Grace. Playing coy isn’t cute. Pretending you didn’t see me wastes both of our time. Did it bother you to see me close to another girl? Is that why you ran out of there?”

  I stuffed my hands in my pockets, thinking about how to answer him. I had been bothered, but mostly with myself. Fidelity from Sebastian was the last thing I’d expect or even want. We weren’t a couple or even anything close to resembling one, so why the hell did my stomach keep threatening to expel from my body at the thought of his fingers tracing over her shoulders?

  Deciding anything less than honesty would keep me out here even longer, I went for the truth—the very carefully worded truth that would keep my inner workings locked up tight from the guy who’d never met a boundary he didn’t want to smash.

  “It bothered me in that I’ve dealt with you stalking me relentlessly and taking more than I would ever give you while you’re out…what? Having sex with other girls? On a triple date with your pals? Maybe some twisted part of me thought you were doing this to me because you felt something for me other than the need to dominate me. But you proved me wrong.”

  His gravitational stare stayed on me so long, I sank down to sit on the other side of the steps. Three feet of concrete separated us, but it wasn’t enough.

  Steepling his fingers between his knees, he finally bowed his head, exhaling a gust of air.

  “Who were you with tonight, Grace?”

  My lips parted, and for a second, I didn’t know what to say. That question was the last I’d expected. I answered because I had nothing to hide, and I figured Helen had told him anyway. “Helen and some friends of hers. Skaters.”

  “Did you fuck them?”

  My lips quirked into a sardonic smile. “Which? Helen or the three guys I met tonight?”

  He huffed a short laugh. “I know you didn’t. You went to a diner and had food. Then you came home like a good girl.”

  “Are you saying you went to a diner, had food, and went home like a good boy?”

  He opened his hands, twisting around to lean his back against the railing. “Does it matter what I say? You’ve already convicted me.”

  My head was beginning to throb the way it always did when I was around Sebastian for any length of time. He was good at this, talking me in circles, and I was too tired to even attempt to wrap my mind around his bent logic.

  “I’m gonna go back to bed now. I’ve answered your questions. Since you won’t answer mine, we’re done here.”

  I pushed to my feet, but Sebastian was faster, crossing the steps in one stride. He braced his hands on either side of me, gripping the railing.

  “You want to know about my night, Grace? I went out with my boys, who invited some girls along. That girl I sat beside? I’ve fucked her before. I could have again tonight if I’d wanted to. It would have been easy. No fighting. No resistance. And maybe I should’ve, considering you think I did anyway.”

  His arms vibrated from how hard he was holding on to the rail. He sounded convincing, but people lied to get what they wanted. I didn’t know if I
believed him…or if it even mattered. He’d made me come, sure, but he didn’t make me happy, and he didn’t seem to care whether I liked him or not.

  My lips fell open on a gasp when he dipped his head, his hot breath feathering across my mouth. He stayed there, his gaze unwavering.

  “I think I don’t know you at all. I only know what you’ve shown me, and it hasn’t painted the best picture of who you are.”

  The way his head canted was so subtle, I almost missed it.

  “You want to know me, Grace?” He practically growled my name.

  “I didn’t say that.”

  Did I want to know him? Wasn’t there a saying that went something like better the devil you know…? If I had some insight into who Sebastian was, maybe I could figure out how to deal with him—or chase him away.

  “Don’t play games,” he gritted out. “Say what you mean.”

  “Fine.” I sucked in a shaky breath. “If you want something real with me, then you’re going to have to be more than this.”

  His brow pinched tight. “More than what?”

  “More than a snarling asshole. More than a guy who’s biding his time, waiting for two weeks to pass so he can shove his dick inside me and feel like I somehow agreed to it. More than someone who touches other girls in public in a way that looks like you’re about to fuck even if that’s not your intention. Just...more.”

  “And you want that? Is that what you’re saying?”

  I tipped my chin, bringing our mouths so close, I could almost taste him. “I don’t know yet.”

  His head fell back, and he howled out his frustration at the full moon. “Why do I try with you? There are a hundred dark corners I could fuck you in and no one would stop me. You know that, right?”

  “I know if you did, I wouldn’t keep my mouth shut.” I shook my head, disappointed despite myself. “I guess you’ve answered. You really are biding your time. If that’s the case, I have no idea why you didn’t take the booth girl up on her offer. You should ask Nate Bergen, I’m sure he’ll tell you I’m not worth all this trouble.”

  Sebastian slammed his fist down on the metal railing. “Never say that fucker’s name to me again.”

  I slumped back, wishing for my bed. “I don’t particularly like saying it.”

  Sebastian’s nostrils flared as he took in a deep breath, then returned his gaze to mine. “What are you doing tomorrow?”

  “Um…” I shook my head in confusion. “Why?”

  “I’ll take you out. You can get to know me.”

  “A date?”

  He frowned again. “Yes. Sure. A date.”

  My teeth dug into my bottom lip, staving off a smile. For reasons unbeknownst to me, my mouth kept trying to curve upward.

  “I can’t. I have plans tomorrow.”

  His hand flew up, freezing an inch or two from my face. I braced myself to be jostled or grabbed, but it never came. He stopped himself from gripping my jaw, curling his fingers into a fist instead.

  “What kind of plans, Grace?”

  He’d hound me until I told him, and I was too tired to stay out here playing mind games.

  “Nothing major, but not something I want to cancel either. I’m going to the beach with Bex.”

  “Who else is going?”

  “Just some friends.” I shrugged.

  “Which beach? Ours?”

  My eyes leveled on him. Calling the beach where he’d almost forced himself on me ours, like we’d had some romantic moment there, really boggled my mind. “You’re not invited.”

  That made him smirk, which made me want to shove him down the steps. “We’ll see.”

  “Stop being crazy, Sebastian.”

  There were a dozen beaches within driving distance. He could check them all, but I doubted he would. In fact, I hoped he wouldn’t.

  He lowered his fisted hand to the railing again, trapping me there. “Don’t make me chase you. You won’t like it when I catch you.”

  I sighed. “I can’t hang out during the day, but maybe at night?”

  His eyelids were heavy with frustration, and it turned out Sebastian was even more beautiful frustrated than angry. It wasn’t right. A boy this bad should have had physical warning signs like boils or maybe a cavernous hole where his soul should have been.

  “Fine.” He said the word, but seemed anything but fine with it. “Now, come sit down next to me for my five minutes. We’re gonna look at the fucking stars.”

  That made me laugh. “I think it’s been more than five minutes. That’s all I promised.”

  He backed away from me, keeping his gaze locked on mine. “I’m parking my ass here. Sit with me or don’t. I’m all out of arguments.” Sebastian took a seat on the steps and leaned his elbows back on the step behind him, tilting his face up to the sky.

  For a moment, I was too stunned to move. Sebastian Vega stargazing? His mural of The Wave popped into my head, and I got it. Behind his violence and darkness, he was an artist. Artists stopped to look at the world when other people didn’t.

  I sat beside him. Not too close, but not on the other side of the steps. His only acknowledgment was a grunt. I tipped my face back, sleepy, but willing to take a few minutes for this. He’d been right, this was peaceful, but it also hit me with a surge of unexpected sadness.

  In my head, I heard my dad’s voice, teaching me the myths that went along with the constellations, his tales a mix of Hindu and Greek and Roman. I hadn’t thought about it in so long. Our last few years had been so wrapped up in his illness, everything else fell by the wayside. It wasn’t his fault. No one could have predicted the last time we’d stargazed would be it. I would’ve given anything for just one more time with him. Returning to the stars beside Sebastian…it was almost too much.

  Twin tears tracked down my cheeks before I even knew they were coming. Sniffling, I wiped them away with the sleeves of my hoodie. I felt Sebastian looking at me, but I buried my face in my hands.

  He didn’t touch me, but the warmth of his body told me he’d leaned in closer. “Go inside, Grace.”

  I peeked at him, but his eyes were back on the sky. “Good night, Sebastian.”

  Stumbling into my apartment building, I took one last look, unable to help myself. The sight of Sebastian Vega, still on my step, relaxed and gazing upward, shook me all the way to my marrow. I shouldn’t have felt anything other than relief he’d let me get away, but I did.

  As sure as the stars lit up the sky, I knew he’d hurt me again. I also knew I was going to give him the chance to do it anyway.

  Chapter Sixteen

  Bex took us to a different beach than the one the night of the bonfire. I hadn’t realized how tense I’d been about returning to...well, the scene of the crime, until she’d told me we were going somewhere else and my muscles immediately loosened, sliding me down in my seat.

  This beach was smaller, tucked in a cove, the waves slight and gentle. A few families dotted the sand, but we were early enough—earlier than Elijah and his friends—we found a space all to ourselves without a problem. I brought a towel, sunblock, and a book. Bex brought everything but the kitchen sink. I didn’t mind it so much when I sat in the shade of her giant umbrella, my ass off the sand in her folding chair.

  She sat beside me, handing me a bottle of water from her loaded cooler. “You look like you need something stronger, but sadly, my parents keep the liquor cabinet locked up tight these days.” She shook her head. “Go wrong with one child and it’s lights out for the rest of us.”

  I laughed at her dark humor. “The rest of us?”

  “Me and…well, me. There’s just me.”

  I sipped my water. “Thanks for telling me I look like garbage.”

  She slapped my arm. “Fuck you. I didn’t say that. You are stunningly beautiful. Immaculate really. No one’s beauty has ever compared and—”

  I slapped her back. “Shut up!”

  Bex giggled. “I was trying to say you look stressed and maybe a little tired.�
��

  “Tired. I didn’t sleep great last night. I’m ready to relax today.” After I went inside last night, my stomach had been tied in knots and my heart had ached. Sometimes my grief for my dad hit me like that out of nowhere.

  But it hadn’t been out of nowhere. Not really. Sebastian’s insistence on gazing at the stars had brought back such strong memories of my dad, I was reminded for the thousandth time he was gone. I couldn’t be mad about it, though, not when I’d sat up for the better part of the night writing down the stories my dad used to tell me, which led to sketching out ideas for my art project.

  We sat there quietly chatting and enjoying the soft waves for the better part of an hour before Elijah and a few of his friends showed up, dragging chairs and umbrellas with them. Maybe I was the odd one out without all the beach paraphernalia.

  Elijah planted his chair beside Bex’s, grinning at us both. I’d only met him once, and it had been dark, but I had to admit, he was pretty cute. Not quite my type, but I could see him for Bex.

  “What’s up, Bexie?” He leaned forward to wave a hand at me. “Grace.” He introduced us to the kids from his school—Annabeth, Lark, Marco, and Shemar—but they seemed more interested in each other than two girls they probably wouldn’t see again.

  Elijah ran his eyes over Bex and me. “Why are you both dry? We’re at the motherfucking ocean. You gotta swim and splash and all that fun stuff. Ignoring that big body of water is a crime.”

  Bex flicked her fingers at him. “We’re getting there. I doubt the ocean is going to dry up anytime soon.”

  He drummed his fingers on his beach chair. “Don’t tell me you’re the kind of girls who come to the beach to look pretty. I mean, mission fucking accomplished, but come on.”

  I tugged at the strap of my white bikini with my thumb. “This thing is triple lined so I can get wet without flashing all the families. Don’t worry your sweet little face about me, Elijah.”

  He tossed his head back, laughing. “You’re cool, Grace. It’s Bexie I’m not sure about.”

  She flipped him off, completely unbothered by his doubts. Instead of engaging in this battle any further, she started playing music from her phone, drowning Elijah out. I knew Bex well enough by now to recognize she was nervous. My experience with boys was pretty limited and mostly awful, but hers was nonexistent. It was possible, even likely, she wanted to flirt back with Elijah or follow him into the water, but she didn’t know how.