My Not So One Night Stand

by Rebecca Robertson

  “Here, I hope I didn’t squash it,” he smiled, presenting me with a square box, labelled ‘Lola’s Cupcakes’.

  Before I had the chance to open it, Luke positioned himself next to me and using his thumbs, wiped away my fallen tears.

  “No more crying, ok?” he whispered, signalling towards the box still situated in my hands.

  I nodded my head, and pealed open the lid, revealing a single, purple cupcake with the words ‘BOYS ARE STUPID’ iced on top. Instantly smiling at the thoughtful gesture, I tilted my head to the side and noticed straight away his amused grin.

  “You’re a boy and you’re not stupid,” I told him, carefully laying the cupcake away from me.

  I almost sent his glasses flying across the room as I hugged him, but I didn’t care one bit. I needed his touch like I needed my next breath and nothing was going to stop me.

  Not even his ability to see!

  “I feel so sick, Luke. I gave him my virginity and it’s something I can never get back,” I whispered, failing miserably at keeping the no-more-tears at bay.

  “I know Maya and I broke his fucking nose for it. He won’t bother you again, I’ll make sure of it,” he soothed, caressing my hair in a comforting motion.

  I jerked away from our embrace and stared at him, wide-eyed.

  “You broke his nose?” I squealed, not quite managing the task of hiding my unforgiving amusement.

  Now that was something I wish I could’ve seen.

  Luke offered me a proud smile and nodded his head, once again, removing all moisture from my eyes using his thumbs.

  “Yeah, he cried like a little bitch afterwards, too,” he smirked, drawing a giggle from my chapped lips.

  He soon joined in and before I knew it, I was flat on my back, gasping for air as images of Jake wailing in pain flooded my mind.

  “Oh Luke, I do love you,” I admitted, sobering up enough to voice out my sincere gratitude.

  He halted his own laughter and laid down next to me, brushing his arm along my side as he went about doing so.

  “I love you too, cupcake.”

  Yet another giggle escaped my lips; this one sounding more strained as I attempted to gain full composure.

  “Cupcake?” I questioned, twisting myself around to face him. “Is that my new nickname?” I asked, pushing the frames of his glasses back up his nose and offering the tip a quick ‘bop’ with my forefinger.

  “Yeah,” he confirmed. “Do you like it?” he then asked, simultaneously scrunching up his face in utter disgust when discovering his glasses were still firmly attached.

  He quickly reached up and practically snatched them away.

  “I don’t hate it,” I admitted, taking hold of his glasses and positioning them over my own eyes. “I don’t know why you hate wearing these. I think they make you look cute,” I stated, fully sitting up and turning my body. “Do I suit them?” I asked, holding my pose as Luke seemingly weighed up his response.

  “Yeah, you suit them. They make you look smart for once.”

  I scoffed at his remark and threw my pillow at his head, utterly outraged by his backhanded compliment.

  “You’re supposed to be making me feel better!” I scolded, removing his glasses and returning them to him.

  He gracefully accepted and proceeded to shove them in his bag; out of sight, out of mind.

  “That’s what the cupcake is for,” he defended, stretching up to retrieve the opened box. “Hmm, delicious!” he moaned, offering me a cheeky wink to go with it.

  “Give me a bite, then!” I demanded, plonking myself next to him and taking a chunk.

  I made sure I got an even ratio of sponge to icing, “Hmm, do you know what? This cupcake is more satisfying than what sex with Jake was,” I laughed, causing poor Luke to choke on his mouthful.

  “Bloody hell Maya, that’s hilarious,” he complimented, resuming his laying down position once all coughing had stopped. “You know, in my mind, you don’t lose your virginity unless you orgasm,” he added, locking his gaze onto mine. “So technically, you’re still a virgin,” he concluded, nicking a bit of purple icing and smearing it on his tongue.

  Telling Luke everything, I may have mentioned how Jake failed to give me the big O and to say he was outright mortified for me would’ve been an understatement.

  “Some man he was,” he concluded, still holding onto some of that anger.

  That’s Luke for you; always looking out for my best interests.

  Orgasms included!

  A soft squeeze of the hand was all it took to bring me back to reality; the ice blue in Luke’s concerned eyes gently reminding me of my surroundings.

  "I lost you for a moment there. Everything okay?”

  He slowly repositioned his head closer to mine and searched my expression for any tell-tale signs of distress.

  “I’m fine,” I insisted, keen to ease his mind slightly. “Just remembering how I came to get that nickname,” I added, nudging his shoulder with my own.

  “Cupcake? You like that one, don’t you?” he asked, blessing me with that cheesy grin of his.

  He knew it was a personal favourite of mine. Having had many fun adventures with Luke throughout the years, it went without saying I had accumulated lots of nicknames along the way. Some sweet, some not so much.

  “You know I do,” I admitted, throwing myself into the space between his neck and shoulder; something I liked to call the Luke cave.

  It was warm, safe and never failed to bless me with his signature smell of vanilla and lavender; a familiarity that had grown to comfort me in more ways than one. We often snuggled like this, finding the act relaxing and nice in a totally platonic way. It was difficult for others to accept our close friendship for what it was and had more often than not caused problems for us in the past. Dan and I used to fight about Luke a lot and I think to some extent; it was the reason behind my many years of bullying at school. Girls would flock to Luke like a fly on shit and seeing as his top priority was always me, I wasn’t well liked. The occasional mean comment and mediocre threats were often dished out, though nothing could’ve prepared me for the entire school getting together to humiliate me in what I thought was a special milestone in my life. Luke flipped absolute shit when he found out what Jake had done and did more than just break his nose. He managed to get everyone’s names that were involved and made sure they paid for their actions some way or another. How? I didn’t know, but just knowing he did something was reassurance enough. It was the moment I realised we were a team and as long as I had him, I’d never want or need anything else.

  “Excuse me? Did you even ask to enter the cave?” he jokingly enquired, pulling me further towards his body and lying back on the sofa.

  I giggled my reply, in no way trying to defend my actions.

  “No. May I enter the cave?” I asked, pressing my face against his stubble-induced neck.

  “I suppose so,” he moaned, secretly enjoying our back and forth.

  Big softie!

  “Where’s Sasha tonight? Not joining us?” he then asked, settling further into his comfy position.

  “Nah, she’s doing some night class at the gym. Zumba, I think,” I replied, unmuting the TV and snuggling closer to my best friend.

  Sometimes, especially when cuddled up to Luke, I really couldn’t think of anything worse than dancing around in my own sweat induced bodily fluids. Sasha had always been the most active among us and whilst Luke occasionally worked out, I did not!

  “Just me and you, then,” he stated, kissing my forehead. “Perfect.”

  CHAPTER FOUR

  Breakfast in Bed

  The annoying monotone sound of my alarm blared straight into my ear as I scrambled around to shut the damn thing off. I had no idea how I got to bed, having fallen asleep on the sofa, but managed to force myself up and into the shower before work. Skipping on hair was tempting, but that would’ve thrown me off my entire schedule for the rest of the week and it really wasn’t worth the has
sle.

  “Maya, do you want Nutella or jam on your-.”

  “Whoa, Luke!”

  My infuriating best friend stopped dead in his tracks when seeing I had yet to cover up, leaving me as naked as the day I was born. He simply stood there and gawked, unsure on how to appropriately react.

  “Close your eyes!” I yelled, flinging myself into the safety of my fluffy dressing gown.

  It didn’t matter that he had seen it all before; the fright alone was enough to shock anyone into the comfort of their oversized fluff monster.

  “Sorry, I was just checking what you wanted on your toast,” he ensured, innocent as ever.

  I laughed at the thought of him seeing my womanly parts due to enquiries surrounding the toppings of one’s toast, but still, I was never one to pass up an opportunity and since he was offering…

  “Nutella and can you slice some banana on top?” I asked, slowly removing myself from the dressing gown, having now recovered from the shock.

  “Sure.”

  “And knock before you ask Sasha!” I warned, knowing she wouldn’t be so lenient if he were to catch her in the act of getting dressed.

  Living together throughout university meant I had seen my fair share of bare bums and naked penises; although we didn’t normally make a habit of stripping off in front of one another. That being said, Luke had walked in on me numerous times and probably knew my body better than a sodding roadmap.

  “I will. Yours are the only lady parts I want to see,” he mocked, turning away and offering up some of that privacy I wanted earlier.

  Piss taker!

  I quickly dried my hair and skipped on straightening it before wandering into my tiny kitchen where Luke stood slaving away over mine and Sasha’s breakfast. He chopped the fruit up into small chunks and carefully positioned them on top my Nutella smeared toast, worshipping the dish as though he were serving the thing to Gordon Ramsey himself.

  “Chill out, Nigella. I’ll be eating the thing in two seconds,” I joked, stealing a slice. “Hmmm amazing, thanks, chef!” I added, bouncing off to prepare mine and Luke’s lunch for work.

  Training to be a family lawyer, he interned for a high-end firm in Kensington where staff were expected to wear expensive suits and fancy watches. Luckily, it was a paid internship and although he, alongside three other trainees, had to battle it out to land themselves the final spot, it was a great position to have on the CV. Not that I doubted Luke in any way. He was a damn good worker and put in far more effort than the other three did, but you could never be too sure about these things. We’d often discussed plan B, which very appropriately translated to: get pissed, drown one’s sorrows and find another job. Perfectly reasonable.

  Thankfully, Sasha and I chose far less stressful career paths to go down, and whilst I’d hardly call waitressing and being P.A. to Harrold Wallowitz a stress-free job, it beat what Luke had to endure on a daily basis.

  “You making me ham salad?” he interrupted, edging his face closer to my fridge.

  “Yes, I’ll even chop your cucumber up finely if you get your face out of my personal space,” I chastised, nudging him in the ribs.

  “Uncool and unnecessarily mean but fine. If that’s what I must do to get my cucumber cut the correct way,” he sighed, doing as he was told by removing himself from my workstation.

  “Sash! You want lunch made?” I shouted, hearing her mull around in her bedroom.

  “No thanks, babe!” Came her response, making my job much easier.

  I continued to prepare two lunches whilst occasionally eating my breakfast, all while Luke watched from afar, interjecting every now and then with news coming in live through his app.

  “There’s been an armed robbery in High Wycombe. Nothing serious though, no one was hurt,” he explained, scanning through the article on a quick skim. “And a drugs raid went down in Brixton last night. No one got charged in the end,” he continued, resting both elbows on my kitchen counter.

  “Mayo?” I asked, licking my fingers clean of tomato juice.

  “Salad Cream, please. Did you know Matt from Uni got engaged?” he questioned, having seemingly switched from breaking news to Facebook.

  “Summers? Really? Who’s the not-so-lucky girl?” I laughed, visibly cringing when memories of the guy filtered through my mind.

  Mid-way through our first year, Matt had successfully gotten Sasha back to his place, only to then suggest a threesome with his female housemate. Needless to say, she told him where to shove it and left almost immediately after. And I say almost immediately after because she insisted she finish her drink first.

  Classic Sasha.

  “Kirsty Nicolson. Never heard of her. Poor sod,” replied Luke, putting his phone down in front of him. “We going out tonight? It’s bank holiday weekend, should be quite busy,” he asked, rubbing his tired eyes.

  “Can do, or we can stay in if you’re tired?” I suggested, placing our sandwiches in a food bag.

  I tossed Luke’s to him and laughed when he completely missed, allowing for the bread to fall on the tiled floor.

  “Reflexes on point this morning, Anderson!” I mocked, putting the dishes in the sink and packing away the food.

  “A little warning wouldn’t go amiss,” he argued, retrieving the sandwich and placing it neatly next to his phone. “Today’s gonna to be shit at work. We’re dealing with a fucked up case at the moment.”

  “Child abuse?”

  “Nope, neglect,” he stated, looking truly heartbroken.

  “Poor thing. It’s awful to think what goes on behind closed doors, but at least you’re doing something about it. Just think, the more shit you uncover, the more likely he or she will be put into a safer environment,” I offered, knowing very little about the UK’s care system but thinking it must be better than neglect.

  “Hmm, you’re right. I just feel like I’ll need to unwind a little after it, ya know?” he expressed, having made up his mind with regards to our plans.

  “That settles it then. Let’s get shitfaced!” I sang, slipping on my flattering work shoes.

  “You heard back from that job you applied for yet?” he asked, helping me fight my way inside my jacket.

  “Nothing yet. I’m losing hope,” I sighed, buttoning up. “Maybe you could help me apply for some more this weekend?” I suggested, hopeful in my enquiry.

  Being the last to acquire a decent job was certainly having its effects and although I was realistic in the knowledge that these things took time, I was slowly becoming impatient.

  “Yeah, course I will,” he replied, shoving his own coat on. “Your shit on toast is on the counter, Sasha!” he then yelled, making me smile.

  “Avocado is not shit, you fucker!” she laughed, certainly giving as good as she got.

  “Right, bugger off, you’ll be late for work otherwise,” I stated, shooing him out of the kitchen and into the messy living room. “Christ Luke, what the hell happened in here?”

  The curtains had been half pulled, or should I say half dragged to the centre of the pole and the bag of popcorn appeared to have relocated to the floor where tiny crumbs laid embedded in the carpet.

  Fucking men!

  "Shit, I must’ve knocked the bowl over in my sleep. I didn’t realise, sorry cupcake.”

  “Don’t you bloody cupcake me, get out my home you tramp!” I laughed, grabbing my keys and physically shoving him out.

  “What? I haven’t even brushed my teeth yet,” he protested, to which I pushed even harder.

  “You have your own damn house! Go home, brush your teeth and put on a suit. I’ve made you lunch, what more do you want?” I asked, preparing my leave.

  I shouted to Sasha, telling her I’d see her later and proceed to lock up behind me, mindful of our dodgy neighbours.

  “I’d like some Maya lovin too, please?” he smirked, resembling that of man up to no good.

  “Piss off!” I threw back, bootie bopping him out of the way.

  The term, ‘Maya
lovin’ came from a particular drunken night on the sofa whereby I spilled my guts to Luke and Sasha regarding my overly friendly, slightly assertive and very much married co-worker, Jack. He’d asked me out one night and just as I was ready to join him for a drink at the pub; his wife had shown up to surprise him on their anniversary. It was a blessing in disguise really. Jack was a bit of a ladies man and you should never get involved with someone you work with anyway. Still, somehow the phrase, “Well he’s not getting any Maya lovin now!” fell from my drunken lips, making its stamp on history.

  “Alright, I’m off,” he informed, walking down the corridor in a confident stride. “Later, gator!”

  “Cheerio you hoe!” I yelled back, startling poor Mrs McGregor - mine and Sasha’s elderly neighbour - as she came out to collect her post.

  “Morning dear, I see that lovely gentlemen stayed again,” she commented.

  “I know,” I agreed, hoisting my bag over my shoulder on a slightly sassy, definitely amusing fling. “I can’t seem to get rid of him, Helen. He’s like my annoying brother,” I added, offering her a sly wink as I walked past.

  Except, Luke was anything but annoying. He could completely wreck our curtains and mush an entire bag of popcorn into the carpet and I still wouldn’t give a rat’s arse. He was the pork to my pie, the chips to my gravy. He was the Luke to my Maya.

  ~~~

  At exactly five O’clock, I keenly packed away my things in a ‘Fuck-yeah-it’s-Friday-night-let’s-get-smashed!’ sort of manner and checked my phone to find two unread text messages from Sasha.

 

  I suddenly frowned at my screen and sighed, regretfully so. Today’s soul destroying shift had been more than stressful and I wanted to let my hair down.

  Scrap that, I needed to.

 

  I laughed out loud at the second message and shook my head at her outrageousness, drawing the attention of Jen, my manager.