Beneath This Ink

by Meghan March

  “Whatever you do, remember this isn’t her fault. She had nothing to do with it. If you don’t see that, then you don’t deserve her. And if you do something stupid, you’re going to lose her. And what’s more, you’re going to lose her to me. Because I can give her what she wants. I can make her dreams come true. I can give her a fucking foundation to run. And I will. If you walk away, you better believe I’ll make it happen.”

  The prick didn’t have to state the obvious. Of course it wasn’t her fucking fault.

  But that hadn’t stopped me from doing something stupid.

  I’d never forget the sound of her scream when I’d pulled that trigger.

  Fuck.

  My need to scare the literal piss out of an old man had changed the way she’d see me for the rest of her life.

  Titan was right.

  I didn’t deserve her.

  I’d known it last night sitting on the dock with Lord.

  I knew it today.

  I scrubbed both hands through my hair.

  It was still too long.

  “You need a haircut.” The words were practically stolen out of my brain. I looked up. Vanessa stood beside the ring, only thirty feet away. She was covering her mouth with a hand. “Sorry. I guess that’s not an appropriate opening line in this situation.”

  I barked out a laugh. I hadn’t thought I’d find a reason to be laughing any time soon. Leave it to Vanessa.

  “I think we’re beyond what’s appropriate, princess.” The nickname slipped out, and the reason for calling her that had never been truer. She was fucking regal standing there. To this day, the most beautiful woman I’d ever known. That was a fact that wasn’t changing.

  Part of that regal look was because her posture was so stiff. I hated that she looked so uncertain of her welcome. I hated that what I’d done had thrown up this wall between us. I hated that she had every right to hate me right now. My gut twisted with the thought. Titan’s words echoed in my brain. Fuck that asshole. If there was a chance in hell Vanessa could get past what I had done, I wasn’t walking away. I wasn’t good enough for her before, and I wasn’t good enough for her now. I didn’t have it in me to be the better man—but I sure as fuck could be her man.

  I opened my mouth to speak, but shut it again. I wasn’t good with fancy words and didn’t know how to ask what I needed to know.

  Her heels clicked across the floor as she came closer. Almost close enough to touch. My hands tensed with the need to drag her against me and muss up her perfect hair and tear down the wall between us. But I didn’t reach for her because she was holding out a folder.

  “This belongs to you.”

  I found my voice. “What is it?”

  “The deed you gave me. I never took it to the parish clerk to make the transfer official. It didn’t seem right for the foundation to take more from you than it already has.”

  I stared at the folder but didn’t touch it. That deed had started this whole thing, and she was giving it back. Fuck. Disappointment, swift and sharp, rushed through me.

  My eyes snapped up to hers. “You trying to say you’re done with me, princess?”

  Vanessa’s fingers dug into the folder and the edges bent, but she didn’t answer my question. She continued, “I also came to tell you that the foundation is going to be investigated by the Attorney General’s Office, at the board of directors’ request. It’s likely going to be dissolved, and all the funds dispersed to other organizations. There’s a chance you might even get your parents’ money back, although I really can’t say for sure.” She paused. “Everyone will know what Archer did. I know it’s not the justice you wanted, but it’s something anyway.”

  “I don’t give a fuck about the money or even the foundation—except I’m sorry as hell you’re not getting your shot at running it.”

  She blinked, head jerking back at my response, but I didn’t let her speak. I grabbed the folder out of her hands and tossed it on the ground.

  “You didn’t answer my question, Vanessa.”

  Her teeth sank into her lower lip for a beat before answering. “I think the question is whether you’re done with me. I mean… what Archer did…”

  I shook my head. “Didn’t have shit to do with you. So don’t take that on. You’ve got nothing to apologize for. I, on the other hand…” I let my words trail off, not wanting to highlight once again why I was a total fucking prick. But I manned up and finished, “I killed him. Doesn’t matter that I didn’t put a bullet in him. It was my doing.”

  Vanessa took a step forward, closing the space between us. Laying a hand on my chest, she said, “You’ve carried guilt for something that wasn’t your fault for too long. Don’t make that mistake again here. This wasn’t the first heart attack Archer’s had. He’s been in congestive heart failure for almost a decade. After Titan confronted him, he knew this was all going to come toppling down. He baited you. The things he said… I think he wanted you to pull that trigger so he didn’t have to face up to what he did. If you ask me, he’d already given up on living, and his body reacted accordingly.” She paused. “It’s not a medically sound opinion, by any means, but that’s how I see it.”

  Her brilliant blue eyes shined up at me, and in them I saw absolution.

  If she had it in her to offer me forgiveness for what I’d done, then I’d be a stupid man not to grab it—and her—with both hands and never look back. And for the record, today, at least, I wasn’t a stupid man.

  We stood in silence for several seconds while I gathered my words. They might not be fancy, but they were the truth.

  “I haven’t loved many people in my life, because there’s always been a constant: I’ve never been able to hold on to any of them. Lord and I were ripped apart when we were just little kids. Joy and Andre were gone too soon. I walked into this expecting that I’d never be able to hold on to you. I didn’t want to love you, because not only would it be a certainty that I’d lose you, but when I did, it’d wreck me. But it was fucking impossible not to fall in love with you.” I hesitated for only a moment, taking in the tears shimmering in her eyes, and framed her face with my hands. “So if you’re waiting for my answer: I ain’t done with you. I’ll never be done with you. If you’d hated me for what I’d done, I would’ve found a way to change your mind. Because you’re mine, and I’m yours—and I’m never letting you go.”

  Her tears spilled over, and I caught them on my thumbs. “Don’t cry, princess. You know that shit kills me.”

  The smile that spread across her face clued me in to the fact that these were happy tears.

  “It’s a good thing you’re not done with me, because it would’ve been really awkward when I handcuffed myself to your bed and told you I wasn’t going anywhere.”

  My chest shook with laughter, and I dropped my hands from her face to her ass and hauled her up against me. Vanessa clutched my shoulders as I lowered my mouth to her lips.

  The initial rush of relief I felt at Con’s words was burned away by the white-hot need streaking through my veins. He devoured me with his kiss, but I wanted more. Needed more. I pulled my head away.

  “I want you. Here. Now.” My words were desperate, hungry.

  I needed to feel his claim all the way to my bones. I needed him inside me to reinforce the fact that he wasn’t going anywhere. That what we had was real. Solid. Forever.

  Con’s eyes darkened to a deep blue, and in them I saw hunger that matched my own. He broke our stare, taking in the interior of the gym with new purpose. When his gaze landed on the weight bench, I grinned inwardly. He turned, saying nothing, as he carried me to it. Lowering me carefully until I was seated, Con dropped to his knees in front of me, pulling off my shoes and shoving up my skirt. He dragged my panties down my legs, and I was bared to him. Con’s eyes darted up to mine again before he cupped me between my legs.

  “This is mine. And so is every other fucking part of you.”

  I reached forward and buried my hands in his hair. “Just like ev
ery part of you belongs to me.”

  “Always. Forever.”

  “I love you, Con.” I lowered my mouth to his, wanting his taste on my tongue again.

  Against my lips, he whispered, “Love you more, princess.”

  When our kiss finally broke, Con laid me back, dropped his shorts, and growled, “Better hold on, baby. This might get a little rowdy.”

  I grinned, because when he straddled the bench and thrust inside me, it did.

  When you’ve had the kind of reunion I did with the woman you were crazy in love with, you didn’t question her when she told you to ‘follow her.’ You got on your bike and you followed that woman anywhere she led you. And when those twists and turns took you into the heart of the Garden District and behind the fence of her father’s house, you grabbed hold of yourself by the metaphorical balls and you manned up, regardless of the fact that you once passed out drunk against that very fence. Old insecurities fought their way to the surface, but I crushed them as I lowered the kickstand and swung my leg over the bike. I opened Vanessa’s door and helped her out of the car.

  “Princess, we storming the castle for some reason?” Because this was pretty much the last place I wanted to be right about now. Or ever.

  She smiled and replied, “Sort of. I think it’s long past time I introduced my father to my boyfriend. Or reintroduce, as it were.”

  A fist of uncertainty grabbed hold of my gut and clamped it tight while I fought for some semblance of nonchalance.

  “You really think that’s a good idea? From where I’m standing, it ain’t necessary.”

  Vanessa grabbed my hand and laced my fingers with hers. Her blue eyes shined up at me with love and sincerity. There was nothing I wouldn’t do for her when she looked at me like that. Hell, it really didn’t matter how she looked at me, I’d do anything for her.

  “It’s very necessary. How else would I ever convince you to pick me up at the front door for a date?”

  My eyebrows hit my hairline. “Now you’re fucking with me.”

  She shook her head. “No. I’m serious. It’s time we bring this out of the shadows and into the light where we both deserve it to be.” She squeezed my hand before she added, “I’m not hiding anything anymore, especially not how I feel about you.”

  Well, fuck. When she put it like that, what could I say?

  I leaned down and pressed a kiss to her temple. Eyes squeezed shut, I whispered, “You humble me. And that’s just one more reason I fucking love you.”

  I pulled back, and we walked hand in hand up to the front of the elegant, antebellum mansion. Vanessa pulled her keys out of her purse and let us inside. Her father’s booming voice echoed in the house. “Vanessa, is that you? What did the board decide? That fucking Archer. If he wasn’t dead, I’d kill him myself.”

  I couldn’t help but nod my head absently in approval. Maybe Vanessa’s father and I weren’t as different as I’d always thought. But as she led me deeper into the house and across the threshold into his study, that sliver of confidence was snuffed out.

  “What the hell is he doing here?” Royce Frost was seated behind a desk as large as a ’57 Chevy. It probably cost more than one, if my limited knowledge of antiques was accurate.

  “Dad, you remember Constantine Leahy.”

  Frost’s gaze zeroed in on our clasped hands.

  “And I repeat, what the hell is he doing here?”

  I had to give Vanessa credit, she didn’t falter in the slightest.

  “You wanted to know if I was ever going to settle on a man, and I wanted to introduce you to the one I’ve settled on.”

  “Is this some kind of joke?”

  I straightened, refusing to shrink under his stare. “No, sir. And there’s no joke about the fact that I’m in love with your daughter, and she’s in love with me. I know I don’t deserve her—”

  “Damn right, you don’t.”

  “Daddy, if I were you, I’d watch what you say right about now. I’ve made my choice, and if you can’t be happy about it, then I’d prefer you say nothing at all.” Vanessa’s words were quiet, but firm.

  Frost eyed me with all of the ice his name implied. “You willing to cause a rift between a father and his only child just to get a piece of ass, boy?”

  I dropped Vanessa’s hand and stalked forward, slapping both palms down on the surface of the desk. “Don’t you fucking talk about her like that, old man. I don’t give a damn what you say about me, but you will fucking respect her. I don’t care how old you are, I’ll teach you some goddamn manners myself.”

  I expected him to rise, which he did. He laid both hands on the desk and leaned forward, mirroring my posture.

  “What did you say to me, boy?”

  “You heard me, old man.”

  His blue eyes were an aged and paler version of Vanessa’s, but they speared me all the same.

  “You going to threaten to beat every man who disrespects her?”

  “Without a fucking doubt,” I vowed.

  I expected him to reach across the desk and plant a fist in my face, or maybe reach under the desk and pull out a shotgun, but this time my expectations were off. Instead, he nodded, straightened, and held out a hand.

  “It’s nice to see you again, Mr. Leahy.”

  I stared down at his outstretched palm, shocked that he was offering it to me.

  “Excuse me?”

  “You may not have been my choice, but any man who’d threaten to kick my ass in my own house for disrespecting my daughter is a man I can respect, even if I don’t particularly like him.”

  His words floored me. I was still processing them as we shook.

  “Better treat her right, though. If I hear even a whisper otherwise, I’ll hunt you down like a dog.”

  I wasn’t going to argue with that. “Fair enough, sir.”

  “Then it really is good to see you again, Constantine.”

  The handshake may have only spanned a few seconds, but its impact on me was monumental. It might have been grudgingly given, and provisional, but Royce Frost was showing me his respect. Like I was an equal. My shoulders straightened of their own accord, and I stood taller. The chip Vanessa had accused me of carrying seemed to shrink.

  When I stepped away from the desk, Vanessa moved to my side and tucked her arm into mine.

  “Con will be staying for dinner.”

  “Damn right he will be,” Royce said, studying me. “Going to take me three courses of grilling him to make sure he really passes. Heard you were a military man.”

  I nodded. “That’s right. Army. Special Forces.”

  He lifted his chin. “Impressive.”

  “And that’ll be the end of the grilling,” Vanessa interrupted. “You’ll make him feel welcome or we won’t be coming back for dinner any time soon.”

  “You live here; I think not coming back for dinner would be difficult, Vanessa,” her father pointed out.

  “Not for long. I’m moving in with Con.”

  I jerked my head to the side to look down at her. “You are?”

  Vanessa gave me a playful smile. “Yes. You were just getting around to asking me.”

  “I was?” This was not something she should have dropped on me in front of her father. If he didn’t want to kill me before, now he’d want to for sure.

  “Sounds like we’ve got more to talk about over dinner than I thought,” Royce drawled.

  We left Vanessa’s father’s house four hours later. There’d been no bloodshed at dinner, and I was surprised to find I’d actually enjoyed myself, aside from the discussion about Archer and the havoc he’d wreaked. I was done thinking about it, done dredging up the ghosts of my past. For the first time in my life, I had a future I couldn’t wait to experience.

  When I’d opened the door of Vanessa’s car for her to get in, she’d shaken her head and said, “Nope. I’m riding with you.”

  And she had, waving to her father from the back of my bike as we’d driven away. I think my pipes had r
attled the windows of the neighborhood, but I didn’t care about anything but Vanessa’s arms wrapped around me.

  I parked beneath the lake house and led her out to the pavilion.

  “So we’re moving in together, huh?”

  Vanessa’s eyes danced. “Yes, we are.”

  “And if I said we’d be living above Voodoo?”

  She laid her hand on my chest and looked up at me. “I don’t think you get it yet, Con. I’d live anywhere with you.”

  “How do you feel about the apartment during the week and here on the weekends?”

  “I told you, anywhere you are is where I want to be.”

  I pressed a kiss to her forehead. “I still can’t believe you took me to your dad’s house.”

  “It was long overdue.”

  I glanced around and surveyed the houses on both sides of us. Dark.

  I reached for the hem of my T-shirt and yanked it up and over my head.

  “What are you doing?” Vanessa asked. “Not that I’m complaining about you shirtless.”

  “Something else that’s long overdue.”

  I spun her around and unzipped her dress. She didn’t protest, just craned her head to watch me unzip my jeans and tug them off.

  “We’re going skinny dipping,” I elaborated.

  Vanessa grinned and let her dress fall to the dock.

  “I take it you’re game?” I asked, holding out my hand.

  She reached around her back and unclasped her bra before tossing it onto the growing pile of clothes. Her underwear followed.

  She took my hand.

  “Hell yes, I’m game.”

  We sprinted toward the end of the dock and jumped off the edge into a future neither of us could’ve predicted.

  Not only did I get my second chance, I finally got the girl.

  Shit. I went overboard again. I blew out a puff of air toward my forehead to push the stray hair off my face. It didn’t work. I jammed the knife in the strawberry jam and used the back of my wrist to smooth it away.

  I surveyed the stainless steel surface in front of me. Well, you’d be able to tell it was stainless if it wasn’t completely covered with paper lunch bags filled with peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, applesauce, granola bars, pudding cups, fruit, and homemade chocolate chip cookies.