First Comes Love: A Chronicles of Moxie Novel

by Z. B Heller

  “It is. But I’d like to have some input, not just be told that it’s going to happen. I feel like he’s trying to be a father to me.”

  “You did tell me that the other night in bed you called Raj Big Daddy.” I smiled.

  Ryan almost busted his gut laughing.

  Renee’s response was something one of her fifth grade students would salute her with—the bird.

  “Okay, back to business. We only have a short time to eat before our appointment at the bridal salon, and you have to start pinning down some ideas,” Ryan said as he took the menu from me and replaced it with a magazine.

  “I have a better idea. Why don’t we have a barn themed wedding and I can get married in overalls. The cows can be my bridesmaids and roosters can be groomsmen.”

  “While I always enjoy a nice cock next to me, I think it would be better to keep things more traditional,” Ryan added.

  After we ordered and ate, we rounded out our meal with a not so healthy slice of Snickers cheesecake. I tried to convince Renee we shouldn’t leave the waitress a low tip because she rubbed me the wrong way. But Renee said something about karma and she didn’t want the baby coming out with three heads if we stiffed her and that I was being overly hormonal. I loved my best friend, but she was the most superstitious person I knew. Once she dropped her compact case on the floor, breaking the mirror inside. She cried for two hours, swearing that she was doomed to seven years of bad luck. To ward off the bad luck, she took a whole can of salt and poured it over her shoulder. Too bad it was the wrong shoulder, but I didn’t tell her that.

  We walked to the bridal salon on an upscale street of Chicago. Martha said my dad wanted to pay for the very best dress available. Who was I to reject the idea of a designer wedding dress? Although at this point in my pregnancy I would be happy to get married in sweatpants and a T-shirt.

  We made it to a small building that had beautiful wedding dresses displayed in the large window. All of the samples looked like they wouldn’t fit a woman over a size two. I was sure that a dress for larger women or pregnant women wouldn’t draw in the correct clientele if they were placed next to the petite ones in the window. Inside, the beautiful boutique looked like something out of Barbie’s dream house. Pastel pink wallpaper covered the walls and crystal chandeliers hung from the ceiling. The smell of lilac candles burning was overpowering. There were three-way mirrors positioned in front of couches where friends and family could sit and view the bride as she modeled all the dresses in front of them.

  A woman dressed in a black pencil skirt, crème silk blouse walked up to us.

  “Hello, may I assist you?”

  “Yes, I am here to try on some wedding dresses,” I said.

  “Oh, that’s phenomenal! My name is Sandy. Do you have an appointment scheduled?” Sandy strode to the desk and opened the appointment book.

  “It’s under Moxie Summers.”

  “What a fantastic name. We will definitely have to find a dress that lives up to that.”

  I instantly liked Sandy, even with her sophisticated appearance, she still had a vibrant personality, which made me feel a little more at ease about the situation. Wedding dress shopping was unnerving when you’re pregnant and don’t want to feel judged.

  Sandy came back to us from the desk. “Are you expecting another person?”

  “Umm, nope. Just us.” I waved my hand toward Ryan and Renee.

  “Because I got a phone call yesterday asking when the Summers party would be coming in.”

  I gave Sandy a puzzled look. Who could be calling to ask when I was coming dress shopping? Miles? That seemed out of place considering I told Miles if he saw my dress before the wedding I would take his balls and place them in his eye sockets so he couldn’t see. Before I could ask Sandy if the phone call came from a man or a woman, the door to the boutique swung open, and I nearly lost the Snickers cheesecake I had eaten.

  Martha.

  “What the hell are you doing here?” I clenched my teeth so hard, I was convinced that I would break some.

  “I couldn’t miss my daughter trying on wedding gowns. This is every mother’s dream!”

  Sandy clapped her hands together. “Oh, that is so beautiful—”

  “Martha, you are my stepmother and I wanted this time to be with my friends.”

  “I’m here for your father. He wasn’t feeling good and wanted to make sure that you found your dream dress. I couldn’t say no to him because this wedding means so much to him. This could be the last time we all share a special occasion as large as this.”

  I felt a pounding in my chest as if my heart had broken into pieces. I thought about my dad walking me down the aisle, knowing how proud he would be of me and the woman I had become. I didn’t have the heart to let him down, even if it meant I had to deal with Martha.

  Ryan came up behind me and whispered, “I say we take one of the dresses, wrap it around her head, and run for the hills. Don’t worry, I’ll use that ugly dress in the corner.”

  “That’s really kind of you to suffocate my stepmonster, and I have thought about the idea on a number of occasions, but I’m doing this for my dad.”

  Ryan massaged my shoulders to relieve the stress, but it was a failed attempt.

  “Why don’t we move into one of the dressing suites, and I can start pulling some dresses to look at. What are you looking for, Moxie?” Sandy asked.

  “I think a ball gown that sweeps to the floor would be simply majestic,” Martha added.

  “Martha, you do know that I will be showing when this takes place, right?” I looked at her like she was smoking crack.

  “I thought this would be a beautiful way to accent the joy that was coming to your life,” Martha said with a rueful smile.

  I turned to Sandy. “I was thinking of something tea length. Perhaps a capped shoulder and definitely with some room to grow.” I put my hands on my stomach and looked down at my baby bump.

  “I have a few ideas that I can pull. Why don’t you all have a seat and relax. Can I bring out some champagne?” Ryan and Renee both raised their hands in unison. I grumbled with jealousy. “I’ll just take a glass of water, thanks.”

  “Of course.” Sandy smiled and left the four of us sitting in the dressing room. To say that there was an uncomfortable silence in the room would have been an understatement. But Martha, being Martha, was quick to start talking.

  “I have fantastic news,” she said.

  “You have a meeting you forgot about and have to leave?” Ryan replied.

  “Oh, Ryan. You’re such a jokester. I remember when you pretended to be straight and brought Moxie to her cousin’s wedding. I knew something was up when you pinched one of the groomsmen’s tushies.”

  I put a hand on Ryan’s arm, holding back his reply, and simply shook my head.

  “I have an appointment for us to meet with the best wedding coordinator in Chicago after this appointment.” She clapped her hands and bounced up and down in her seat.

  “Umm, wow. That’s… nice,” I said. I already had an appointment scheduled with a coordinator that Miles and I had picked. I spoke to her on the phone and she had a good idea of what we wanted.

  Sandy came back into the room carrying massive gown bags behind her. An assistant came in after her holding a tray of champagne and water.

  “I knew exactly what dresses to pull when you described them to me. We have a section of maternity dresses and I think we will be able to find the perfect dress. I also pulled some that your mom wanted to see on you as well.”

  “She’s my stepmom,” I pointed out.

  “Let’s try on hers first, and I want to save my favorite for last,” Sandy said with a sparkle in her eye.

  Sandy hung the dresses and unzipped the first garment bag. Tulle poured out and my stomach sank. Sure, as a child I would have loved a big puffy, Cinderella dress. But my style had changed and since I was pregnant I had other ideas in mind.

  Our mouths fell open as we looked at the gown S
andy pulled out of the bag. The bust was surrounded by crystals and tiny buttons ran from the back of the dress down the train, which had to be ten feet long. I felt sick; the dress was hideous.

  “That is stunning!” Martha said with glee. “You must try it on, Moxie.”

  I looked at Ryan and Renee, trying to mentally to ask them to shoot me now. Ryan stepped out while I undressed and put on the monstrosity of the dress. It took Renee, Martha, Sandy, and her assistant to get me into the dress. I could only imagine what it would take when I was seven to eight months pregnant. We would need a giant shoe horn. After it was finally on, Ryan came back into the room and started laughing hysterically.

  “Moxie, your dad would be so happy with this dress. It’s perfect.”

  “Martha, it looks like the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man came over and took a dump on me.”

  “Watch your mouth, young lady. It’s perfect in every way.” She clasped her hands together.

  “We have more to try on, so why don’t we get out of this one and try on the others?” My head dipped forward and I groaned. After the marshmallow diarrhea dress, I tried on several more that I didn’t think were “the one,” but then Sandy unzipped the last bag and pulled out a stunning, white, tea length dress. It had a satin top lace, three quarter inch sleeves and a chiffon shirt that flowed to my knees. The finishing touch was a white ribbon that tied in the back. There were dainty, lace cap sleeves that completed the look of the dress. It was perfect because it was elegant and allowed plenty of space for my pregnant belly. I knew it was the one even before I tried it on.

  Ryan and Renee gasped when they saw the dress. This was the vision I had in my mind. Sandy helped me step into the dress and closed up the back, tying the bow in place. I turned to see myself in the mirror. Some have said that every girl will have that moment when she will see herself in the mirror with the perfect wedding dress and will start to cry. The feelings will overwhelm her so much, she’ll become emotional. I looked at Martha to see her reaction to the dress I loved. She curled her lips with icy contempt, but I ignored her.

  I turned around to everyone else in the room and said, “We have a winner, bitches!”

  After Sandy took some measurements, Martha put a down payment on the dress. We then left to meet Martha's wedding coordinator. I was beyond thankful Renee and Ryan were with me because I needed backup. Miles and I had discussed what we wanted for the wedding and we were on the same page about everything until I suggested we all wear overalls and roast a pig in the backyard. I was kidding, of course, but not the part about roasting the pig. Maybe I would accidentally push Martha into the fire pit with an apple placed firmly in her mouth.

  The wedding coordinator's office wasn’t that far from the bridal boutique so we walked over instead of hailing a cab. The office was located in a new building that had replaced one of the original structures in the area. It looked completely out of place with the rest of the architecture around it. It was sleek and white on the outside with round windows that surrounded every level. The door frame of the building was lopsided and looked like something out of a Tim Burton movie. Burton films scared the shit out of me and I was convinced I was going to have nightmares.

  “I hope they don’t coordinate weddings that look like this building. I’m afraid Beetlejuice will be the officiant marrying us.” I looked at the contemporary art pieces that filled the lobby.

  “That is your one time to say that.” Renee looked at me with wide eyes.

  “What? Beetlejuice?”

  “Shhh! He will appear if you say it three times,” she whispered.

  Ryan’s lips curved at the corner and one eyebrow shot up. Renee could be a little neurotic.

  “No, it’s true. I was at a sleepover once and one of the girls said it three times and then he jumped out at us.”

  “I thought you told me once that it was her younger brother trying to freak you out.” I rolled my eyes at Renee’s absurdity.

  “It doesn’t matter! If you say it three times, bad things will happen.” She wrapped her arms defensively around her midsection.

  I walked up to Renee and stood nose to nose with her and quietly whispered, “Beetlejuuuuice.”

  “Well, helloooo, everyone!” The owner of the shrill voice, a woman with teased, brown hair and a leopard print dress, walked in our direction.

  I turned back to Renee and wrapped my arms around her shoulders in terror. “You were right! I’m sorry I didn’t listen. Make the evil monster go away!”

  “Who is the lucky bride?” The scary leopard print woman asked.

  I pointed to Ryan while he pointed at me. I could only imagine what this lady’s ideas for my wedding were going to include. Visions of plates heaping of cheese cubes doled out by people with hair nets. Gaudy neon hearts, papier–mâché… Was there a Moose Lodge in the area? She probably already had it reserved for us. Granted, I shouldn’t have judged a book by its cover, but the cover screamed tacky so it was pretty hard to ignore.

  Martha grabbed my arm and pulled me forward. “This is the blushing bride, her name is Moxie. And I’m her mother, Martha.”

  “Actually, stepmom, Martha,” I said.

  “It’s fantastic to meet you both, I’m Julie, your wedding coordinator.”

  Wait, back the farm tractor up. I didn’t remember signing any paperwork that we were working with this tragedy of a woman. I narrowed my eyes at Martha, sensing she had something to do to with the decision making process.

  “Julie is the best in the field,” Martha said, trying to defend her actions. “Plus your dad wanted you to have the best wedding. He actually suggested we use her.”

  “How would my dad know anything about wedding coordinators?” I asked.

  “He looked it up on the Internet,” Martha replied.

  I thought this piece of information was suspicious considering that my dad didn’t even know how to use the Internet. But I decided to store this piece of information away because I wanted to make him happy. He probably told Martha he wanted the best and Martha helped him navigate his way around the web.

  “And who are these two darling people?” Julie waved to Ryan and Renee.

  “They’re my bodyguards,” I responded before Renee and Ryan got the chance to talk.

  “They look pretty small and thin to be bodyguards,” Julie said, eyeing them both up and down.

  “Trust me, they might be small, but they’re scrappy. Especially this one.” I pointed to Renee. “She does this thing where she bends down to your feet and bites your ankles. Three people are bound to wheelchairs for life because of her.”

  Renee and Ryan giggled behind me.

  “She’s such a jokester.” Martha gave me a disapproving look. “That is Renee and Ryan. They are the maid of honor and best man.”

  “Okay, well then, shall we get started? My office is this way if you’d like to follow me.”

  The four of us followed Julie into her large office. The room was decorated with examples of different wedding paraphernalia: centerpieces, fake cakes, wedding invitations, and dear God… there were neon hearts. I think I actually heard Ryan’s jaw fall to the floor in disgust. Ryan was a huge fan of the show My Fair Wedding. And took it upon himself to know what was tasteful and god-awful when it came to wedding planning. So for Ryan, this was stepping into hell.

  “Why don’t you all have a seat at the table, and I’ll pull out my portfolio to share some of the past weddings I’ve done,” Julie said as she moved one of the fake cakes with little stairs connecting the three tiers.

  Renee leaned over to whisper in my ear. “How much do you want to bet that she’s only done weddings for the mafia?”

  “If that’s true, I’m surprised they didn’t give her a cement bath and throw her into the Chicago River because it was so awful.”

  Julie returned with her overstuffed portfolio. Thumbing through the pages of her portfolio, I was stunned by the beautiful weddings she had planned. Maybe I didn’t give her enough credit or maybe
I was hallucinating.

  “Before we begin, Moxie, why don’t you tell me what you imagine your dream wedding to look like,” Julie asked while opening up her large notepad.

  “My fiancé and I have talked about having the wedding around June. I know that’s quick, but we didn’t want to wait for the end of the pregnancy.”

  Martha let out a little cough.

  “Yes, Martha?” I said with annoyance.

  “I think your father would like to have a late summer early fall wedding.”

  “Does he realize I’ll be as big as a house by then, and he’ll have to roll me down the aisle?”

  “I know, sweetie, but I’m just stating what your father wants.”

  I rolled my eyes, realizing that this appointment was going to be a struggle if Martha kept this crap up. I just had to keep reminding myself that it was for Dad. I knew it was not Dad’s wedding, but I wanted to do as much as I could to make him happy in the time he had left. Even having Martha around, I never saw that same sparkle in his eye. I hoped that having this celebration would put that bit of happiness back in his soul before he passed on. Tearing up, I a grabbed a tissue from the box that sat on the table.

  “Oh honey, are you okay?” Renee asked and took my free hand.

  “Yeah, pregnancy hormones and the idea of finally getting married.” I lied.

  Whenever I told Julie what Miles and I wanted, Martha was there at every turn contradicting every suggestion. I said that we wanted to keep it relatively small, and Martha reminded me we had to invite all the extended family because they would have invited us. I said we didn’t want black tie and Martha insisted on a formal gathering. Through all of this there was one demand I wasn’t going to budge on.

  “Julie, in a Jewish wedding we have a chuppah. It’s like a canopy that covers the bride and groom during the service. My dad’s sister is taking my mom’s wedding dress and creating the cloth that will hang above us. It’s very important to me that this be included in the wedding.”

  “Moxie, if I would have known that I would have given you pieces of the suit I wore when I married your dad. It could have been a symbol of your two mothers,” Martha said.