Sheikh's Virgin Love-Slave

by Brooke, Jessica

  Or...

  Or he could return to the penthouse. He could order some food delivered to them. Was the Chinese place they loved so much too greasy for her now that she was pregnant? He was troubled he didn't know. And they could simply...forget that the past week or so had happened. They could be themselves again. They could be happy.

  It would feel so good. He could feel himself longing for it even as he thought of it, longing for the warmth that had always come so easily to them.

  He wondered bleakly if that was what had put him in such a foul mood. The thought was uncomfortable, to say the least. Instead of it being a betrayal that had made his heart constrict, that had made that black despair rise up within him, it was merely her absence. There was something in him, that strong blood that had driven his ancestors to conquer, to protect and to rule, that roared in denial of being that much in thrall to anyone else, of allowing himself to be ruled.

  However, he had to admit to himself, if someone had to rule him, there would be far worse choices in the world than Bedelia.

  Jahin put his head in his hands. For the last few days, he had been in a fog. He kept waiting for it to clear up so he could think, so he could act, do what was right, but now as he pressed on, nothing was clear. Every way he turned, there was nothing that would help him.

  Chapter Seventeen

  The day faded and turned to night. Bedelia kept herself occupied by reading up on multiple births, by learning of what she could expect, and occasionally by watching television, but the day stretched out endlessly until it was over.

  She paced in the living room restlessly, looking up at every sound. She heard the guards outside the door change shifts, speaking quietly to one another as one pair left and another arrived. She found herself strangely envious of them, with lives that looked so simple from where she was sitting.

  She contemplated doing another set of exercises, but if she went through the same motions again that day, she thought she might scream.

  The hands on the clock ticked to eight. Then to nine. They hit ten, and she felt something soft and small inside her quiver and shake with pain.

  When the clock struck eleven, Bedelia had to hug herself against the pain.

  He's not coming back here, she thought, and she tried to stop the pain that raged inside from destroying her. She kept her tears back as best she could, but a few escaped anyway, running down her face where she brushed them aside angrily.

  Silly little fool, she thought viciously. Did you think it would be so easy? Did you think that someone like you could simply seduce a man like him into doing your will?

  She wondered what was in front of her now. Would she have the courage to chase him? That had been her plan, but now that she thought of it, she wondered if she had the stamina to do so. Her heart wanted to keep chasing him, but when she glanced down at her growing belly, she wasn't sure.

  Multiple pregnancies meant an increase in the amount of fatigue she was going to feel. She knew that, and now she could feel that. If Jahin wanted to get away from her, then he absolutely would, and there would be nothing she could do about it.

  She winced away from the image that she presented, the unmarried mother chasing after the man who had abandoned her. Her pride wailed in protest, but her heart, her foolish wounded heart, could not see any other way.

  No, I'll find him, she thought. Not tonight, I need to sleep or I will be utterly destroyed tomorrow, but I will find him.

  Despite her resolution, she found that she couldn't go to bed. She dressed herself in a long, embroidered cotton nightgown, and instead of going to the guest bedroom or Jahin's master bedroom, she stayed in the living room. Perched in one pale wing chair, she looked out over the city, which twinkled with a thousand bright artificial lights. The stars above were canceled out by the lights below, but she knew they were up there. They had held silent witness the first time she and Jahin had made love. She wondered what they thought now.

  Bedelia rested her hands on her belly. Even in the last few days, it had felt rounder, firmer. After the initial shock had set in, it had become all too believable that there were children inside her. Well, she understood in her mind, at least. She suspected that it would probably take a little longer before she truly understood in her heart that she was carrying three children.

  "Hey kiddos," she said softly, cupping her hands over her belly. "Some of the articles that I read said I should talk to you. No time like the present to start, huh?"

  She paused as if she expected them to reply somehow, and then she chuckled at herself.

  "So even if I'm just vibrations to you right now, I bet you can feel some of what's been going on lately...and babies, I am so sorry. I am so sorry that this is happening, and I am sorry that you are feeling it the way that you are."

  She felt her voice wobble, and she kept the tears back.

  "Life...life isn't always this sad or this scared, okay? I promise. I promise that I will do whatever I can to make the world as good for you as I can. Your daddy will too, I know that."

  Even as her heart ached, she knew that was true. If his children needed anything, Jahin would move heaven and earth to get it for them.

  "Let...let me tell you a story." She could feel herself getting sleepy, as she did so easily these days. Bedelia knew she should get up and go to bed, but the chair was so comfortable, and if she got into bed, she would have to realize all over again that she was alone in it.

  "Once upon a time, there was a foolish young girl who crossed the ocean and ended up at a horse fair. The horses were all so beautiful that she lost her way and ended up menaced by a pair of wolves. They were going to catch her and eat her right up when a bold sheikh rode up on his jet-black horse and saved her.

  "They...they fell in love, and for a while, the sheikh showed her the treasures of his land. They laughed, and they ate, and they cared for each other so much that it was like a burning brand in their hearts. If this was another story, this is where they would live happily ever after..."

  She wiped her eyes, but right now, she was more tired than sad. It occurred to Bedelia that this was how love died. One day you were in love, and then the next you were heartbroken. That was all the songs ever told you, but the truth was that after heartbroken came tired, so tired. She could barely keep her eyes open, but she kept talking. There was something soothing about the words of their story, hers and Jahin's and their children's, falling into the familiar cadence of a fairytale.

  "But the girl got scared. They were having such a good time, but they both knew that they couldn't be together forever. At first she thought she could be all right with that, but then something happened, and she knew she couldn't be.

  "So she ran. She climbed on the back of an enormous flying bird, and she tried to fly away, but the sheikh was a great hunter. He sent his two fine hunting falcons after her, and when he brought her back, he was so angry that he locked her in a tower."

  Bedelia paused for a moment, taking a deep breath.

  "She thought the tower would have been fine if he had stayed there with her. She could live in a cave as long as the sheikh was there with her. She got so lonely that even though she was carrying three children in her belly, she chased after him. Perhaps if she chased after him hard enough, perhaps if he saw her, spoke with her, touched her, he would remember what they had."

  She was on the verge of drifting off to sleep on the couch when a quiet voice broke in.

  "Did it work?"

  Bedelia was so tired that she didn't even jump. Instead, she only turned to see Jahin stepping out of the shadows. She realized he had entered the apartment while she was speaking, without her being aware of him at all.

  "I don't know," she said softly. Her gaze met his in the dark, and if her heart could have broken any more, it would have. "I hope it works."

  For a moment, it looked as if Jahin was going to speak, but then he only sighed.

  "Come on, storyteller," he said softly. "You can't sleep there."


  She didn't protest as he lifted her in his arms. There was simply something so very right about being held close to him, about hearing his heart beat in time with hers, that she relaxed instantly. She had been so tense, and this was what she had needed to make it stop.

  Bedelia was vaguely aware that he carried her to his bedroom. She remembered the feel of the mattress, the singular scent of his fresh sheets. She murmured with pleasure as he drew the blankets over her shoulders, but when he tried to pull away, she grasped at his sleeve.

  "Stay," she said imploringly. "Please. Just for tonight, I don't want to be without you."

  He was still a long moment, and then with a sigh, he kissed her forehead.

  "All right," he whispered, and a sleepy smile crossed her face.

  She fell asleep listening to the familiar sounds of Jahin stripping to the skin before coming to lie behind her in the bed. His long, lean form cupped hers perfectly, and finally, finally, she was able to fall into a deep and dreamless sleep.

  ***

  Bedelia woke up feeling whole and healthy, and at first she was confused. She hadn't slept well in days, and to wake up feeling so alert and cheerful now was almost strange.

  Then the memories of the night before came rushing back to her, and her eyes widened.

  The bed next to her was empty and cold, but she could hear someone moving around in the main part of the penthouse. She bit her lip, wondering what she should do.

  Finally, she took a quick shower and dressed herself. She thought about putting on an outfit that was alluring and designed to catch the eye, but regretfully, she put the thought aside. It seemed silly and cheap now by the light of the morning. Instead, she pulled out a gray-green dress that made her eyes glow bright, and she took a deep breath.

  "Wish me luck, kiddos," she said softly, stroking her belly, and then she walked into the living room.

  Jahin wore a pair of black silk boxers and a silk robe. Despite its already being mid-morning, he was obviously not going to work, and she felt a small hint of hope.

  Instead, he was seated at the breakfast nook, and there was a full breakfast of bread, fruit and coffee in front of him.

  "Is this a private breakfast, or can anyone sit down?" she asked.

  "Well, I'm afraid that I have a guest coming," he said politely, and at her crestfallen look, he laughed ruefully. "I'm sorry, I think I'm still getting used to...well, never mind. It was a joke, and a bad one. Of course the other seat is set for you, Bedelia. Please, sit down."

  She smiled a little at her own foolishness and took her seat. A brave woman might have simply launched into a new attack, but right now, it felt too good to be doing something as normal as having breakfast with Jahin that she couldn't interrupt it just yet.

  "This looks amazing. I can't have the coffee, but the rest of this is perfect."

  "Ah, I had forgotten about the coffee. What would be better for you?"

  "Anything that doesn't have caffeine, really," she said with a shrug. "Not a big deal. Most of the eating changes I have to make are ones that I should be making anyway. I like my junk food way too much."

  "Ah, so no more spicy kebabs?" he asked teasingly, and she groaned.

  "Don't even mention them. I can have them after the kids are born, but until then, I should really be eating better than that."

  There was a pause while she ate some delicate melon and a croissant, and when Jahin spoke again, there was a thoughtful tone to his voice.

  "There is so much that I never knew about pregnancy. I suppose a part of me always thought it was woman's work, that I would not have to know at all..."

  "Well, that's terrible," she said tartly, but he continued.

  "But now that this has happened, now that you are carrying my child, my children...I want to know all about it."

  She blinked in surprise at him, and when she spoke, she felt oddly cautious. "There's a lot to know, and I'm still learning...but do you want to learn with me?"

  He smiled at her, and she was surprised by how shy his smile was. "I do."

  She had a moment to bask in the warmth, but then he continued.

  "There is...so much between us right now," he said heavily. "Sometimes, it feels as if we will never come out into the light again."

  She started to protest, but he held up a hand, and she fell silent.

  "Let me speak, please... The truth is that we have muddled things, you and I. I have always believed that there is a proper time and place for all things, a rhyme and a reason. We have done things out of order. We have feelings we shouldn't have had, we will have children that shouldn't be--"

  Bedelia lurched to her feet, all but snarling at Jahin. In the back of her mind, she was shocked at how quickly she could go from happiness to rage, but then the rage consumed her.

  "Don't you say that," she cried. "Do not say that about our children, that they shouldn't be, as if they were some kind of mistake!"

  He rose up across from her, putting his hands on her shoulders. She nearly went to strike him, and he grasped her wrists in his hands. After a moment, she realized there was nothing she could do against his much greater strength, and she subsided, glaring at him. Bedelia allowed him to guide her back to her chair, but she still fumed with rage.

  "That is not what I meant, and I am sorry." There was real regret in his voice, so she would believe him for the moment, but still she watched him, suspicious now.

  "I didn't mean that they are mistakes. I meant that... Bedelia, I was taught that marriage comes first, followed by children who are born into a safe and stable place. That troubles me, and there may be problems down the line..."

  She started to argue again, but his next few lines stopped her cold.

  "But right now...there is nothing we can do but enjoy each other. We should simply enjoy what we have right now, Bedelia. I am tired of holding myself back from you. There is simply so much between us that we want, that I am almost afraid that I need."

  It took her another moment to find her voice.

  "What are you saying?" she whispered.

  "Until the children are born...I want everything back the way it was. I want to be with you. I want to forget that the last few days took place.”

  It was everything she should have wanted, but somehow, she found herself objecting. “But they did happen. We can't erase them. We are the people that we are because of what happened.”

  “I know,” he said, and he looked straight into her eyes. She was startled when she saw a hint of pleading there. It shook her to the core, seeing that there was something he wanted that she could grant him like this.

  “What are you asking me?” she asked, finally sitting back down. She felt as if her skin was buzzing with electricity. She felt as if at any moment, she might have simply toppled over from too much exhaustion, too much stimulation, simply too much.

  For a moment, Jahin only looked at her, his eyes lit up with that light she had always thought of as dragon fire. He was impossible to read right now, and before he even started to speak, she was grinding her hands together, trying to figure out what was coming forward.

  "I want you," he said softly. "Pure and simple."

  "There's nothing pure and simple between us," she commented with some bitterness. "Not after I ran away. Not after you decided to hold me here and tried to steal our children."

  He waved his hand, and she fell silent. Bedelia noticed there was something in him that was no longer angry. He was tired, and a part of him longed for her, but right then, the rage that had been such an obvious part of their dealings for so long was banked.

  "I know that very well," he said with a shrug. "I know that better than you do, I think. For the past few days, I feel as if I have been nothing more than a victim of my emotions. I have been pushed here and there by my head, my heart, by you, by everything that I know is true."

  She could at least understand that. Some part of her was pleased that she was not alone in all of this. Another part of her was confused as to h
ow they could ever get through this, together or apart.

  "I want a clean slate," Jahin said finally. "I...I do not know if this is a cowardly thing to ask, and I certainly do not know if it is something that will harm us in the future, but right now, that is what I want most."

  "A clean slate," Bedelia said, looking at him. She saw nothing but honesty in his face, no ploy, nothing that was going to rear up and bite her if she wasn’t careful. "Tell me what you mean by that."

  "I want to stop being angry," Jahin said simply. "I want to simply be with you, and to be a part of things. The children that you are carrying, they are my firstborn. They are...they will be part of my legacy, whether they stay in Muneazil or they return to the United States as citizens."

  She frowned at him. "You are...willing to let them make their own choice?"

  "I am inclined in that direction," he said. "I stayed up last night thinking, and I am not sure if I received more than a few hours of sleep. I told myself that I am going to have children; I do not want to be at war with their mother."

  "This was never a war," she began, but he shook his head.

  "We were treating it like one. And when a mother and a father fight, the children must be counted as casualties."

  She shivered at that. Her parents had stayed together, but plenty of her schoolmates had parents who were torn by divorce and bitter recriminations. She ran her hand over her belly, knowing in that moment that she wanted far better for her triplets. For all of them.

  "So then, sheikh," she said softly. "What does a peacetime truce look like between us?"

  He raised his eyebrows at her.

  "You have been pursuing me," he said with such assurance that she couldn't even begin to deny it. “In your mind, what does it mean to you?"

  Bedelia frowned. In some ways, this was everything she had hoped for, but there was something wrong with it. She didn't quite understand what. It felt empty, and it felt strange, but she pushed that aside.