Adrian's Undead Diary (Book 7): The Trinity

by Chris Philbrook

  Adrian turned to Blake, a steel quality in his posture and voice. “Are you coming with me? I could use a Ranger buddy. Looks like I’ve got some business to deal with.”

  Blake watched as Adrian’s powerful sense of purpose filled his eyes. For a moment Blake felt it was rage boiling over, but Adrian seemed to be fully in control. Blake wasn’t sure what was more frightening; Adrian’s uncontrolled rage, or the fact that Adrian now seemed to be able to harness it.

  “I’m ready,” Blake said with confidence, but he couldn’t be sure that was the truth.

  “Gilbert, anything else?” Adrian asked as he dropped the magazine on the rifle hanging across his chest. He slapped it back in when he saw it was full. Old habits.

  “Yeah. That rifle won’t matter in the Lacuna. You are the weapon, not the things you bring here. Might as well dream you have a slingshot. Remember, your force of will is the most powerful weapon you can bring to bear here. Remember that. Nothing can stand in your way if that’s what you want. You can move mountains if you choose to, but you need to have faith in yourself. God has faith in you Adrian. Remember that.”

  Adrian nodded, and closed his eyes. He was going to dream of righteous fury.

  *****

  It was cold in his dream. Cold enough that even before he opened his eyes he knew he’d be able to see his breath. Cold enough that he could feel the warmth coming from where he knew Blake was standing beside him. Adrian opened his eyes and took in the dull, featureless gray expanse of the Lacuna. He’d named this place. That gave him power.

  Blake’s breathing was hard, labored. Adrian turned to make sure he was okay. Blake looked Adrian in the eye once he realized his leader was assessing him. “This is the place. I can almost tell this is exactly where I came to when I arrived here.”

  “Good. I can’t imagine Old Scratch would have you pop into the boondocks. I’d imagine he’d want you gift wrapped on his front porch.”

  “Thanks for the comforting talk. You’re a real peach, you know that, right?” Blake said with a smirk.

  Adrian laughed and the sound of it made the cold dim. “Yeah. People can’t get enough of my overwhelming positivity and cheer. I’m like a fucking walking holiday of happiness. After this I’m going to beat on some puppies,” Adrian said as he slung his rifle over his shoulder. Gilbert said it was useless, and he believed him.

  “You know the idea that you might actually be the savior of mankind horrifies me when you talk.”

  “I totally understand that,” Adrian said with a grin. He took a few steps on the spongy gray earth, testing the footing. It was like walking on nothing. He felt as if he was simultaneously lighter than air, and yet still pressed down by some all encompassing weight. He felt held. It was a strange sensation.

  “Ready to do this? I’m not sure exactly what’s gonna happen, but I feel like the longer we wait, the worse off we’re going to be,” Adrian said as he made fists at his side.

  “Yeah that sounds about right. Adrian I feel weird man, kinda sick. Like I’m about to puke. Something is wrong.” Blake’s hands sunk to his stomach where he used them to rub at his guts. Adrian saw his discomfort.

  “That’s evil. Trying to fuck with you. Let’s turn the tables and get you freed up” Adrian said flatly. The fear was gone in his voice.

  “Okay,” Blake said meekly as he clutched his roiling insides.

  Adrian closed his eyes and started to shout into the haze of The Lacuna, “Hey you! Can you fucking hear me?! I’m here! I’m here and I’m pissed, and I’m ready, and I'm done playing this fucking game! Send me your fucking best! Step the fuck up and test me!”

  His challenge failed to echo, and was met with damp, cold silence. Adrian focused behind his closed eyes and thought of what the Devil would do to answer his challenge. Flashes of evil creatures, monsters, and villains passed through his vision like a late night horror movie montage. It was like spinning the rolodex of bad dreams.

  “Well, well. Thought I’d seen enough of you and your bullshit. How’d you wind up here?” A man's voice said in the darkness not too far away. Adrian knew exactly who it was. He’d never forget that voice.

  “Hey Sean. Blow me.” Adrian opened his eyes and took the man in. He looked the same, only pale, saturated in the gray that pervaded everything here. His small round glasses were nearly luminescent, preventing Adrian and Blake from seeing his eyes. It was eerie and fitting. The round discs were obscuring where his soul should've been.

  “Thanks but no thanks. What’re you doing here, disturbing my relative peace? Pissing in my backyard after ruining my fucking life?” Sean spat.

  Adrian smiled, relishing the change to confront the villain he'd struggled against for so long. “Normally I am not the type of person to celebrate the bad fortune of others, but Sean, I did not ruin your life. You ruined it yourself. I just gave those people in that school a better chance at a better life, and you didn’t take the easy out and walk out. You got what you deserved, straight up. If that doesn’t sit well with you, then that’s something you need to square away with your damn self.”

  “Fuck you Ring. “ Sean’s soulless glasses almost flared with white light at the statement. “Why are you here anyway?”

  “I’m here to spring my good friend Blake here. I’m under the impression he’s sort of tied to this place, and we need to visit a little bit of justice on this neighborhood. I challenged the dark one, and it looks like he sent you to fight instead of stepping up on his own. Sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but you sir, have been sold down the river, and are about to catch an ass whipping that will be fucking LEGENDARY.” Adrian smiled, and Blake felt a wave of power come off him like heat rising off the pavement. For the first time Blake saw and felt what others believed.

  “Ha. You can’t kill me here. I’m already dead, and this is where I am king. Gimme your best shot you cocky asshole. See how tough you are without that fucking gun.” Sean lowered his head and started walking towards Adrian, malice in his motion.

  “Watch this,” Adrian said softly to Blake as he took off his M4 and handed it to him. Adrian turned towards Sean, and started walking straight at him. In Blake’s mind’s eye he watched as the gray haze parted for Adrian like he was cooking English fog off with nothing more than his body heat. The horrible pain in Blake’s stomach started to settle as the two foes closed on one another. Two eternal forces opposed, representations of good and evil, about to do battle.

  Sean’s first blow came at Adrian’s face much faster than Blake was expecting. It still wasn’t fast enough. Adrian’s instincts were sharpened over years and years, and his training far exceeded that of a normal person. He was expecting the strike. Adrian ducked down and to the right as Sean’s fist sailed high. Adrian’s right hand cocked back and hammered multiple times upwards into Sean’s side, cracking a handful of ribs with a series of sickening crunches. Adrian straightened out and slammed an elbow into the dead politician's face, sending him reeling backward. Sean doubled over and spat red blood onto the gray earth as Adrian circled him. Blake was watching a cat toy with a mouse.

  “Sean why the bullshit? Why turn yourself into this petty king in Westfield? Why use people like slaves?” Adrian asked him, genuinely intrigued.

  “Why do you care? People are idiots Adrian, they’re cattle. They want to be fed out of a trough, without worries, and put away at night into a barn where they think it’s safe. Sooner or later we take them to market when they aren’t useful anymore and we get what they're worth and no more. It’s no different. I’d just rather be the man holding the prod, and not the cow getting brained in the slaughterhouse.” Sean launched his body at Adrian suddenly, slamming into the larger man, sending them both sprawling into the soft, cold ground.

  Sean landed on top and immediately began to rain blows down on Adrian's face and shoulders. Each small fist struck down with a Cobra's venom, almost taking bites out of the warmth that Adrian had projected so confidently moments ago. Adrian reached up with his b
ig hands and deflected several of the blows, but many made it past. His lip split, spilling blood, and one eye was threatening to fuse shut from swelling.

  Adrian reached down along the gray ground and yanked hard on the inside of Sean’s knees, pulling him off balance. With the other hand he shoved down and away on the opposite knee, twisting Sean’s whole body to the side, mitigating his power. Adrian’s hips twisted like a shark twisting in the open sea, and before Blake even realized what was happening Adrian went from being pummeled by Evil's champion, to sitting astride Sean’s stomach, pinning his back to the ground. Adrian sat up tall as Sean hit his thighs ineffectively, his fists bouncing off of the cords of muscle under Adrian’s khaki pants.

  “Sean you stupid prick,” Adrian said as the dead politician squirmed underneath him. The big man spat out a wad of his own blood. “You aren’t the man holding the fucking prod. You never were. You were used just like you used them. You thought you had the prod but you were just the last fucking cow in line. Look at where you are now. You think this is a reward? You wander aimlessly in the cold, with no warmth, or love or friendship. You have nothing.” Adrian brought his right fist back and sent it downward into Sean’s jaw like a jackhammer as Sean tried to fend the punch off. Adrian’s power was too much for the pinned man, and the fist split Sean’s meager defenses like an axe splitting wood. The fist cracked Sean’s jaw and sent broken teeth down his throat. Adrian sat there for a moment as the man under him went limp with pain. Sean’s arms drifted out to the side and he was still, moving only to cough, and spit his ruined teeth out on the cold ground.

  Adrian leaned over and grabbed Sean’s collar, lifting him slightly, letting his head turn so his ear was nearer to his lips. Adrian whispered not to Sean, but to the puppeteer that had been pulling his strings when he had been alive. “Listen to me, and listen good. I’m not afraid of you anymore. I won’t fail at this. I will not give up, and you will not tempt with your bullshit. Right now, you will let go of Blake, and we are walking out of here, free and clear. But don’t forget; I’ll be ready when you come calling again. Mark my words. I am not afraid, and I am waiting.” Adrian let Sean’s head go, and when it thudded into the monotone earth, Sean’s entire body disintegrated into nothingness.

  “Adrian, something is different. I think that worked,” Blake said as Adrian got to his feet. Blake’s stomach felt like he’d purged a terrible presence.

  “Good. Let’s get out of here. Hopefully you’ll wake up soon, and go home.” Adrian said as he walked towards Blake.

  “Hey Adrian.”

  “Yeah?” Adrian said as he felt his mangled lower lip.

  “Remind me to never, ever piss you off.”

  “Noted.”

  *****

  “Why have I not woken up yet? It feels like it’s been days,” Blake asked Gilbert and Adrian, clearly worried.

  The three men were gathered on the porch of Gilbert’s home. Gilbert was rocking gently in an old rocking chair as Adrian sat, his eyes glazed over, staring off into the indistinct distance of the dreamy world. His lip had already mended itself. Blake slowly rocked back and forth in his own chair, almost nervously.

  “Son, time doesn’t matter here. Only events,” Gilbert said. Both younger men turned to him, looking for an explanation. Gilbert felt their eyes on him, and he continued, “We are stuck somewhere. Not in Heaven, or Hell, or wherever we should be going when we croak. We exist outside of the normal flow of things. Only when something important happens do we feel the impending moment. Like seeing a storm on the horizon, and knowing the rain is coming. It might be that your body still needs a bit of healing before you’re ready to wake up. Hard telling not knowing.”

  Blake nodded, apparently happy with that explanation. “Alright I guess. I just wish I was with Kim and little Adrian back at home.”

  The two older men nodded, and Adrian suddenly turned to Blake, something on his mind. “When you get back, when you wake up, you tell them what it is like here, and that I am okay. I’m with Gilbert, and I think I’m going to see some other folks here before I come back. You tell them to fix me up as soon as they can, and you make damn sure Abby and everyone else there is taken good care of. While I am out of the game Blake I am putting you in charge of keeping them safe. You understand me?”

  Blake didn’t respond. He was gone. His chair was still rocking.

  “Hm. Look at that. Guess he had to hear your message before going home,” Gilbert said, not surprised at the sudden turn of events.

  “This place messes with my head something fierce Gilbert. I don’t know how you deal with it,” Adrian said, watching the rocking chair Blake had just been in come slowly to a halt.

  “You wanna see how I deal with it?” Gilbert asked, mischief in his voice.

  Adrian turned, intrigued by the old man’s tone. “Yeah.”

  “As I said Son, we are behind enemy lines. And it is long since overdue for you and I to raise a little hell. I suspect it will be a whole hell of a lot easier for me to wreak havoc with you kicking around. You know I’ve always wanted a sidekick. A trusty sidekick. With a cape, and a mask. I suppose you’ll do just fine.”

  “Ha. If anyone is the sidekick here, it’s you. Remember who God has faith in buddy, words directly from your mouth,” Adrian said with a grin.

  “Remember who you have faith in, kiddo. Let’s get our hands a little dirty.” Gilbert got to his feet with more energy than he’d had in decades, and the two men left the porch, walking with purpose down Jones Road, towards a little bit of work that had to be done.

  October 26th

  Holy shit Blake woke up today, and he was all kinds of loony tunes.

  I’ve spent almost the entire day listening to his ranting and raving, and I tell you what, he’s seen some serious stuff while he was down and out. He didn’t even know where to start, and I don’t even know where to start in recording it all for here.

  Um, okay so they weren’t dead, and they weren’t alive. Both of the dudes were in like this, weird place where the dead go. Blake had a hard time describing it, but as best as I can tell, it’s like being in a dream you can’t wake up from. He also said that it was always June 23rd. Like the afterlife was frozen solid on the day this all began, and when you die, you just go back to that day, and sit there on the sidelines waiting this all out. Blake said he was wandering around, and found Adrian in the orchard, knocked out cold, surrounded by a pool of blood. He also said the orchard was stuck in the summer. Small apples. Weird stuff right?

  I think that’s just about what he said. He also said that Adrian and him were like, hunting down evil and shit in the place where evil lurks. Adrian has mentioned it a few times in passing randomly. He calls it the Lacuna. I looked it up in one of the old dictionaries around here, and Lacuna means:

  'A gap, or missing part.'

  Like in a story, or like an argument, or even more weirdly, like a hiatus, or break. I don’t know where he dug that word up Dad, but for some reason, it creeps me the hell out. I don’t even like thinking that word now. I always dug that Italian rock band Lacuna Coil, but now fuck that. I can’t even listen to those guys again. Adrian has them on this laptop too. I’ve got half a mind to just delete them off the hard drive just for safety’s sake. I feel like we’re inviting badness.

  That’s silly, but I’m kinda freaking out here. Blake had a lot to share.

  So in this dream world, not the Lacuna mind you, Adrian and Blake find Gilbert, and he’s like chilling at his house down the street. He’s got all this good info, and he lays it all on our two heroes like they’re visiting the Oracle at Delphi, and Adrian kinda shits a brick, but he hikes up his skirt anyway, and when they go to the Lacuna to get Blake all freed up from the reins of evil so he can come back alive and stuff, Adrian challenges the DEVIL to a fight, and the DEVIL pussies out and sends Sean. Remember that douche nozzle from Westfield? The d-bag that ran the show and made all those people miserable? I guess the evil or whatever sends him to fight Adr
ian, and Adrian straight up smashes that guy’s face. Then he like, grabs him, and threatens the DEVIL.

  How large do your testicles need to be to threaten evil? Or, alternately, how small does your brain have to be? Either way, Adrian has it covered. Giant brass gonads, and a teeny-weeny brain. He’s double qualified.

  So yeah. Adrian beats this Sean dude’s ass yet again, and then like, after a few days, he talks to Blake and poof, Blake wakes up like he’s been asleep all this time.

  Blake said it was so amazing watching Adrian in the Lacuna. I can only imagine. Blake said it was like watching some magical knight, or a superhero, or like, someone really powerful.

  I’m wondering what the hell we have to do to get him to wake up, and if he does wake up, will he be able to shoot fireballs out of his weiner, and with a wave of his hand turn water into wine, and make vaginas get all lubricated. That’d be perfect. I bet that made you feel awkward Dad. Sorry.

  I’m so nervous.

  Blake said that Gilbert was sure that we’d be getting into some serious trouble here soon. He said that because I was writing in this diary, just like Adrian did, I might draw trouble onto us. Gilbert thought that because Adrian was down and out, we were vulnerable. And you know what, I feel vulnerable. I’m scared Dad. Scared big time.

  I wish you were here to help, but even if you were, you weren’t all that good a shot. I guess it’d be nice just to see you again.

  Blake said that you talked to him and Adrian while he was wandering in the wastes of the dream world, or whatever you want to call it. I’m kind of comforted to know that you’re sort of okay, wherever you are. Not in pain or anything. Blake said Adrian said you sounded sad. I hope you’re not sad and worried about us. Mom and I are doing well, and you can rest.