All a Man Is

by Janice Kay Johnson

  “Scandal broke today in the race for Butte County sheriff,” a young man told them. He was positioned in front of the historic courthouse in Angel Butte. “Staffers for incumbent sheriff Eugene Brock learned that police captain Colin McAllister, who has been leading in recent polls, was denied the job as police chief in Angel Butte when the mayor blacklisted him for reasons no official wants to discuss.”

  The camera focused on a tall man with a craggy face. “Mayor Chandler has endorsed me,” he said tersely. “Feel free to take your questions to him.”

  The reporter said, “Angel Butte police chief Alec Raynor also commented.”

  Alec had joined the other man on the steps. A muffled voice could be heard. “You must know Mayor Chandler’s reasoning.”

  Julia watched with intense interest.

  “I do know,” he said, maintaining what she thought of as his cop face, “and I can tell you honestly that if I had been in the mayor’s position, I would have hired Captain McAllister. I have only the highest respect for his expertise as a law-enforcement officer, his leadership ability and his integrity.” He smiled faintly. “I’d have been the loser, of course, so I can’t altogether regret the decision.”

  The picture returned to the reporter at the courthouse. “Mayor Chandler has been persuaded to speak to us about the rumors,” he said and held out the microphone. The image broadened to include a big, homely, tough-looking man who appeared distinctly annoyed.

  “I gather Sheriff Brock is feeling challenged and felt it was time to start slinging mud.” Muscles flexed in his jaw. “All right. I’ll be blunt. Five months ago, when we first started the search for a new police chief in the wake of Gary Bystrom’s resignation, I was disinclined to hire a candidate from within the department. We had some issues that I cannot discuss without interfering with ongoing investigations. I chose to go with an outsider. I have since apologized privately to Captain McAllister. I have become convinced he would have been a top-notch police chief. My original hesitation had nothing to do with Captain McAllister himself, not personally and not with his job performance. He has my full support in this campaign. That’s all I have to say.”

  The camera cut back to Alec, who was saying, “I’m aware of the frustration many sheriff’s deputies feel with inadequate equipment and salaries, a substandard crime lab and a lack of support from the top. It’s my belief Captain McAllister is exactly what this county needs to upgrade the department. As chief of the county’s largest city, I look forward to working closely with him once he becomes sheriff.”

  “There we have it, Peter,” the reporter said, shaking his head in apparent bemusement. “The full support of Angel Butte’s mayor and police chief—but no real answers.”

  The anchor thanked the reporter, and the channel went to a commercial. Alec turned off the television.

  “That was you,” Liana burst out. She draped herself over his shoulder. “Why were they asking you questions, Uncle Alec?”

  Julia saw him look sideways toward Matt, who had taken the buds from his ears and was listening, too, even if he didn’t want anyone to realize he was.

  Alec hugged her. “Because I’m an important man around here, sweet pea.” More seriously, he explained that he had two captains who worked directly under him at the police department. One of them was campaigning to become sheriff of the entire county. Reporters were asking some questions about him, and of course one of the people they’d want answers from was Captain McAllister’s boss.

  “That’s you,” Liana said in her often solemn way.

  “Right.”

  Julia had been absorbing everything he said, wanting to know what he did every day and about the people with whom he dealt. He’d already told her a bit about Noah Chandler, the mayor, who didn’t sound all that likable. She sensed undercurrents to this news story that she hoped he’d explain when he had a chance.

  Alec smiled at Julia and Liana, then turned to include Matt. “Anybody hungry?”

  “Yeah!” Liana bounced a few times on the bed, bobbing her mother and uncle up and down. Matt didn’t say anything, but got up and shoved his feet into the sloppy athletic shoes that made his feet look enormous. As usual, he left them untied.

  Alec suggested pizza tonight and took them to a place that was already a favorite of his. After their order was in, both kids snatched the money he offered and disappeared into the small video arcade, from which beeps and roars and yelps of triumph already emerged. Matt dropped back, undoubtedly to be sure no one watching would think he was with some little kid, and a girl at that. Julia hoped there was an appropriate game for Liana. She’d have followed to help her get started, but knew Matt would resent having his mommy trailing him. Also—she couldn’t help it, but she wanted time alone with Alec, who was frowning as he took a drink of beer.

  “So, was the television piece halfway fair? Or did they leave out the stuff you really wanted the public to see?” she asked.

  “Huh?” He focused his dark chocolate eyes on her. “Oh, no. It was fine. In fact, I’m a little surprised they slipped my endorsement in at the end.”

  She thought about it. “Do you suppose the news team is secretly anti Sheriff Brock?”

  “That’s a possibility,” he said. “The guy’s scum.” He glanced quickly around as if to be sure no one was close enough to hear, then smiled crookedly. “I didn’t say that.”

  “Of course not.”

  “I confess, I didn’t realize small-town and rural-county politics were as dirty as the big-city version.” He shook his head. “Naive of me, I know.”

  “Oh, we had a hideous mayoral race when I was in high school.” She laughed. “The challenger was a woman, which outraged the guy who had held the office for something like twenty years. According to my parents, half the time he’d run unopposed. He was heard to make some highly sexist remarks that may have appealed to the good old boys in town, but offended female voters. When she roared ahead in the newspaper poll, he dug up the fact that she’d had an abortion many years before. Unfortunately for him, he hadn’t done his research. She did have an abortion, but only after she and her husband did some soul-searching and decided not to go to term with a fetus doctors knew was unlikely to live much past birth. No matter their politics, most people sympathized with her. Mayor Anderson was thereafter doomed.”

  “Deservedly so,” Alec said, amusement curving his mouth.

  “Indeed. Even my father, who is terribly conservative, voted against him. Or so he claimed, anyway.”

  “Your mother?”

  Julia took a deep breath to combat a stab of pain. “Oh, Mom probably voted for him. I doubt she thought a woman should be in office, either.”

  Alec raised his eyebrows and watched her thoughtfully. When she clamped her mouth shut, he stirred. “Isn’t it your mother you have the difficulties with?”

  “Yes. Oh, both, to some extent. They’re...” She tried to think how to explain her parents. “For one thing, they’re older. I suspect I was an ‘oops’ baby. My brother and I are ten years apart, and Mom was forty-two when I was born. She’s seventy-five now, Dad a year older. They were always stricter than my friends’ parents, more rigid. Big on gender roles. To this day, I know nothing about cars or how to get a lawn mower started if it stalls.” She shook her head in frustration. “They were shocked when I wanted to go to college. I had a high school boyfriend who planned to keep working with his father on the family dairy farm. He asked me to marry him, and they were stunned when I said no and not only left for college, but went all the way out to the West Coast.”

  “I didn’t know any of that.” A couple of lines had formed between his eyebrows that made him look perturbed. “You were only nineteen when you married Josh.”

  “Yes, and I blame my parents for that.” She grimaced at his surprise. “Don’t get me wrong, I loved Josh. But we didn’t have to r
ush out and get married. I should have gotten my degree first. But in retrospect I realize that, once I did commit to a man, childhood conditioning kicked in. The little woman should step right into the support role. So much for the great escape from my past. Josh was already navy, and he wanted me with him when he was transferred. I could keep taking classes, he insisted, but, oh, gee, I got pregnant right away.”

  “With the demon spawn,” Alec murmured, a smile forming.

  She laughed. “You didn’t say how the night went.”

  “Let’s just say I have a new appreciation of the Craigslist option.”

  Oh, dear. Their number was being called, and the kids came bursting out of the arcade as if they’d been wandering in the desert for a hundred days and suddenly saw the vision of a feast laid out before them.

  Julia shook her head, although the smile didn’t want to leave her lips. “Have I mentioned that I love him, too, despite everything?”

  “Yeah.” Alec reached across the table and laid his hand over hers, one of the rare occasions when he voluntarily touched her. His voice was a little gravelly, but also...tender. “I know you do.”

  The kids appeared, Matt bearing one pizza and Liana another, the different options the only way Julia had seen to achieve peace when they ordered.

  “Can one of you go back and grab plates?” she asked.

  Liana trotted off. Alec moved over on his side of the booth and Matt slid in beside him. He grabbed a slice of pizza and lifted it, cheese stretching into a long string that kept his slice attached with an umbilical cord to the mother ship.

  “You might want to cut that,” Alec suggested, his tone mild but still firm.

  Her son shot him a resentful look, but wound the string of cheese around his finger.

  Of course, he contributed almost nothing to the conversation as they ate, although Liana chattered happily, having learned to ignore her brother’s scathing glances.

  Alec had finished and pushed his plate away when he shifted on the bench seat and produced a flyer from his back pocket. It was obviously a local effort, photocopied on green paper. Tilting her head, Julia saw a logo for Angel Butte Parks & Recreation at the bottom.

  “These are summer classes and activities, mostly for kids,” he said. “I spotted a few things like ballroom dance for adults. But I know you’ll want to get the kids involved, and this seems like a good way.”

  Matt reared back in outrage. “No way you’re signing me up for some kind of camp for little kids!”

  Julia glanced at Alec, then said only, “We’ll see.”

  She spread open the brochure, Liana pressing close to her so she could see, too.

  “Can I take swim lessons?” she begged. “Ooh, look. A horse camp!”

  Alec smiled at her. “I knew that’s what you’d go for.”

  “There’s a two-week soccer camp,” Julia read aloud, “and orienteering.” She moved her finger on the paper as she read the fine-print description. “You’d like this one, Matt.”

  “I don’t need to be babysat.”

  “Learning to use a compass and make your way through the woods can be useful,” Alec commented. “Your dad would have been an expert. Navy SEALs have to be able to navigate wherever they’re dropped.”

  “This description mentions that the course is based on U.S. Army training,” Julia chimed in, trying not to sound unacceptably bubbly. “Minimum age is...thirteen. Wow, you qualify.”

  “You mean, I could go somewhere without my little sister?” he asked sarcastically.

  Liana couldn’t hide the flash of hurt, but she had enough spirit to stick out her tongue at her brother.

  Alec met Julia’s gaze, his expression rueful, but he kept quiet. She’d seen him biting his tongue enough to know he wouldn’t always handle Matt’s snotty attitude the same way she did, but he was very careful not to act the part of a parent.

  Depressed, she asked herself who could blame him. It was miracle enough that he was willing to do as much as he did. Even to completely uproot and move. When she’d asked Josh to choose between his family and his dangerous, high-adrenaline job, he’d chosen the job. It scared her to think Alec might hate it here in Angel Butte, so far from the high-adrenaline job he’d loved. From what he’d said, he was now stuck behind a desk, probably the last thing he’d ever wanted to do with his life.

  I didn’t ask him, she argued with herself. He offered.

  But that didn’t mean he wouldn’t blame her if he began to chafe at this new life.

  He kept insisting they were his family, but they weren’t really, were they?

  The fact that she wished they were would remain her secret.

  * * *

  HE NOW HAD a new challenge, Alec was disconcerted to realize: keeping his mind on the job now that he had the distraction of family. Alec was known for having a single-minded, intense focus. Back in L.A., Julia and the kids hadn’t affected him so much, because he didn’t see them daily. Apparently, things were going to be different now.

  They hadn’t even been in town forty-eight hours, and whether he was conducting meetings, talking on the phone or working on procedures, his attention was split. Worry about Matt was constantly on his mind; happiness tumbled with the bleak knowledge that Julia was going to be a big part of his life, but wasn’t his.

  This meeting was a good example. Alec rose to usher Naomi Wallace out of his office, hoping he’d actually taken in everything she’d told him. She was the community liaison working for the police department. This was their first meeting of any substance, although of course he’d met her and they had both attended the same meetings a few times. He shouldn’t have put this off for so long.

  He thanked her for letting him know how the police department was involved in both the Fourth of July parade and fireworks and the upcoming arts-and-crafts fair taking place later in the month. “I’ll look forward to Frontier Days,” he lied, but knew Julia would love an art fair that would take over eight city blocks for three days.

  Yeah, throughout the discussion he’d been thinking, I have to tell Julia about that or Good, that’ll be great entertainment for the kids.

  The parade and fireworks slated for the Fourth would be a hit with Liana for sure. He was assured that this one included not only the traditional floats, honking fire trucks with firefighters throwing candy, the high school marching band and a lawn-mower drill team some local men with a sense of humor had dreamed up, but also horses. Lots of horses. The princess chosen by the Angel Butte Merchants Association didn’t ride on a float; she was slated to ride a palomino horse. Liana would be in seventh heaven. He had hopes even Matt would come around, since Alec had been told a motorcycle-stunt and drill team also participating was enough to make the most hardened citizens gasp. The Fourth was always a headache for law enforcement, but he’d already made up his mind to take the evening off. He’d keep his phone with him if he was needed, but he wanted to watch the fireworks with Julia and the kids. The Fourth was a family holiday, and he now had family.

  This meeting, he reflected, was a part of the job he’d been least prepared for. He actually had learned a great deal from Naomi Wallace about his department’s role in special events—closing off roads, patrolling for maximum safety and ensuring activities met city codes.

  Now, by God, he had to get back to his current focus, projecting manpower requirements and documenting his findings in a way he could sell to the city council.

  He’d called up the folder on his laptop and was trying to remember whether he’d received the statistics on calls logged by patrol that he’d requested from Brian Cooper, the captain on the patrol side of the department, when his cell rang. Since he’d been struggling to focus anyway, he glanced at it with irritation.

  The number was unfamiliar. Nonetheless, he picked it up. “Chief Raynor.”

  “We
saw you on television.” The voice was weirdly muffled. Not metallic, as if it was being electronically altered. More as if something was between the mouth and the phone receiver.

  “Who is this?” he asked sharply.

  “You will withdraw your support of Captain McAllister for the position of sheriff.” Muffled or not, the speaker sounded deathly serious. “If you don’t do as we ask, we can make you very sorry.”

  The click was audible. His caller was gone.

  The phone number was local and clearly a landline. After a moment’s hesitation, he called it. It rang half a dozen times with no answer. He redialed. Another half-dozen rings. Again.

  This time he got an answer. “Jerry’s Tavern and Pool Hall,” a man said brusquely. “What can I do for you?”

  “This is Police Chief Alec Raynor. Not two minutes ago, I received a call from this number.”

  “Customers use it sometimes. Maybe it was a wrong number.”

  “No,” he said coolly, “it was a threat.”

  Silence. “I sure as hell didn’t call you.”

  “I wasn’t suggesting you did. I’m asking if you saw who used the phone last.”

  “I’m afraid not. Uh, I’m Jerry. This is my place. I was down in the basement grabbing a keg. There are a couple of locals in here. Let me ask.”

  Jerry covered the phone, but Alec could still hear him call, “Hey, Billy! Marvin, is that you? Yeah, either of you just use the phone?” Their answers were indistinguishable. “Uh-huh,” Jerry said a couple of times. Then, “You see somebody making a call? Just a minute ago?”

  He came back on. “They were playing a game of pool. Neither of ’em could see the hall from there. I had the back door open.” He sounded apologetic. “This isn’t a real busy time of day. I was bringing in supplies from a Sam’s Club run. Afraid pretty much anyone could’ve walked in and used the phone quick, if they were of a mind to.”

  Alec asked a few more questions, but knew it was hopeless. Out of curiosity, he thought he might drive by Jerry’s and see how easily a passerby could have seen a way to slip in and use that phone, unseen.